


Even Darkness Must Pass

by Geektaire



Series: MacDixons [2]
Category: Boondock Saints (Movies), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual macmanus brothers, Canon compliant - to a point, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Demisexual Daryl Dixon, Established Relationship, Multi, Polyamory, Season 4 Rewrite, walking dead/boondock, walking saints
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-08-13 09:06:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 138,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7971031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geektaire/pseuds/Geektaire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to 'Not All Those Who Wander Are Lost' </p><p>Season 4 rewrite. </p><p>Six months have passed since Daryl Dixon's world changed completely. He was now part of a family, he had people that he loved and that loved him in turn. But they are still surrounded by walkers, there are too many people living at a prison, and his brothers and Rick just can't get along for the love of God...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 30 Days Without an Accident

**Author's Note:**

> As promised, first Tuesday of September and here is the first chapter for the S4 rewrite. Got to apologize about not continuing the 25 days of MacDixons, as I explained in Tumblr, I realized I was taking time out of writing the actual sequel to write those one shots... I will try to continue as soon as i have some time to do so...
> 
> Well... hope you guys like it :)

**Chapter I**

**30 Days Without an Accident.**

 

Daryl woke up right before dawn, as he did every morning.  He yawned as he tried to get his mind- the restlessness that he felt every morning- to give him a few more minutes. As he closed his mouth, he sputtered out a few strands of hair that were definitely not his, had somehow ended up inside of his mouth. 

“Asshole,” he muttered as he pushed Murphy away from where he had been sprawled over him. He rolled his eyes when he heard his brother grunt before somehow moving until he had his face burrowed in Carol’s chest. 

The smile on Daryl’s face couldn’t be confused with anything other of what it was. Happiness. Slowly, and with a lot more care than how he had pushed Murphy away, he detangled his legs from where they had been trapped in between Carol’s and stood up. 

The prison had started to warm up again. He usually ran hot, as apparently did his brothers, so they had all started to sleep shirtless much to Carol’s delight. The thick blanket that they had hung to serve them as door was always closed, and people knew better than just barge into their cell.  

He ran a hand through his hair as he approached the blanket, moving it a little bit to let a few rays of light enter their private sanctuary. 

He stretched as he looked back at where his family laid and couldn’t help but feel his heart clench at the picture they made. They had a rough idea of how much time had passed since they had found each other, six months more or less. And he couldn’t imagine living his life like he had been before they came into it. Carol was sleeping in between the two jackasses that were his brothers, the two of them having arrived to their ‘room’ in the middle of the night after their shift guarding the fences was done.  

Silently as only he could, he gathered his shirt, vest, boots and crossbow. He had a job to do, it was early enough that if he got lucky he would be able to get back before they woke. 

He sent a look over his family as he left their cell, the run they had been planning was supposed to take place that afternoon. He sent a prayer to his siblings and his woman’s God to give them some help. But before, he needed to catch them something to eat.  

-.-.-.-

Carol woke up to the feeling of someone’s breath over her face, and she immediately knew who it was. It was time to wake up, he was like her own personal alarm clock and she loved it. 

It had been almost seven months since they had met, and she really couldn’t believe she had lived all those years without them. She couldn’t believe she had spent most of her life without those three men by her side, completing her. 

“I know you’re awake, love.” Carol couldn’t help but smile as she felt his breath on her face, without opening her eyes she reached and ran a hand up his back, loving every second of it until she found his hair. Eyes still closed she used her hand to pull him closer to her, and to get him to kiss her good morning. 

Their impromptu make out session ended when Connor pulled away a few minutes later, still smirking at her flushed look as he pulled her up and basically shoved her out of their room. “You’re late to your chores, sweet dame.”

“And who’s fault is that, you scoundrel?” Connor just smiled even brighter at her as he watched her try to tame her hair as if not give away what the two of them had been doing before she took off to do her morning work. 

“I love her,” Connor said softly, dropping himself back into the bed, grinning even more when Murphy grunted as he fell on top of his sleeping brother.

“Get off you oaf.” 

Connor laughed as he moved to lie on his back next to Murphy instead of over him. He turned his head to look at his brother as they lay next to one another. It had been so long where it was just the two of them, it was hard to remember how scared he had been at the beginning. 

He had been scared of what their feelings meant, he had been scared of what it would be to have basically two strangers in the middle of him and Murphy. He had been scared that they wouldn’t fit, he had been scared that what they were doing was wrong, he was scared that his relationship with his twin, his soulmate, would somehow suffer because of what they were doing.  

He couldn’t help but roll his eyes while smiling when Murphy just moved while half asleep until he had his head on his shoulder and an arm around his waist. He shouldn’t have worried about it, it was like Carol and Daryl were meant to fill a void that neither of them had noticed had been there before. The two of them just fit into their lives, into their hearts so easily it was hard to imagine a life where the two of them didn’t exist. 

“Stop it,” Murphy muttered against his shoulder as he patted his cheek rather forcefully without opening his eyes, effectively slapping him in the face more than once. “Your thinking is not letting me sleep, and that’s saying something because we all know I’m the one that actually thinks between the three of us.”

“Or so you think.” Connor said as he moved his head so he was able to see when Daryl entered their cell, his steps giving away who was approaching their cell, gifting Daryl a smile from where he was watching him upside down. “The jury is still out on that, especially after what you pulled two days ago.”

Connor tried not to laugh at Daryl’s face when he said that. Murphy as usual had been able to convince some of the newer people at the prison that he was in fact Daryl, and had gotten into more trouble than he was ought to for someone his age. 

“He liked it, you love the attention.” Murphy had smirking as if knowing that Daryl was glaring at him. 

Murphy had gotten more than one of the new ladies’ half head over heels with the ‘flirty redneck’ only to have them approach Daryl later on the day not knowing there were two of them. The results hadn’t been pretty. Murphy still sported the black eye courtesy of Daryl.  

“The hell I did,” Daryl growled as he moved to grab his jacket from where Carol hand hung it the night before, taking off the vest before putting it over the jacket once he had it on. “Next time I’m going to make sure you can’t walk properly for a week.”

“Carol won’t appreciate if you hit me in the balls-” Murphy was still lying down with his face against Connor’s chest, not having opened his eyes at all “- I can guarantee you that.”

“She won’t mind as long as I pick up your slack.” Both Connor and Murphy sat up at those words, mouths open at the words that had come out of their brother’s mouth. 

“Are you telling me- “Connor started saying only to be interrupted by Murphy, “that you’re thinking about finally getting down and dirty with our Carol?”

“Did you just…”

“Yes, whatever, but are you saying you’re finally ready?” Connor said interrupting Daryl as he looked perplexed at Murphy’s choice of words. 

“I think so.” Daryl said as he sat down on the bed, his back to his brothers. Both men moved quickly until the he was all but bracketed between them. 

Sometimes simple things like this, sitting this close to one another, filled Connor with pride for how far his little brother had come. Daryl from six months ago, the Daryl they had met when he arrived to the prison would have never allowed them to touch him so close, in a way that seemed so intimate. Their Daryl, this Daryl, sometimes was the one that initiated the contact. 

“You think?” Murphy hugged himself to Daryl’s side as he answered, even if there was a slight question at the end. This was major, this was big. Although Murphy and Carol had gotten ‘down and dirty’ more than once, it was usually exactly that… something quick just to get rid of the need and that was it. What Daryl wanted with Carol in that way, was somewhat different to what Murphy wanted. And the two of them were so happy for their brother to finally seem ready for it. 

“What is the plan? Do you want us here? Do you want us gone? Do you have candles? And rose petals? And what about music?”

“Murphy! Shut up!” 

-.-.-.-.-

Daryl couldn’t help but glare at yet another woman who looked at him in a flirty way as he made his way out of their cell block and towards the outdoor kitchen they had recently finished. He knew it was a fair mix-up, for them to think he was Murphy; after all they looked exactly the same. The only two people that had not mixed them up, for real, ever where Connor and Carol; it was even worse now that he had allowed Murphy to tattoo his neck, as well as his brother not allowing Carol to cut his hair. 

“Morning Daryl.” He nodded as someone greeted him, repeating the movement when even more people joined the first one. The only one that received a greeting from him was Dr. S, the man after all had saved Carol and that made him special in his eyes. 

“Smells good.” The smile that appeared on Carol’s face almost, almost, made him break into one himself. If it hadn’t been from the teenager that was looking at him like he had never seen someone before, he probably would have. 

“You just have to remember, I liked you first.” She was teasing him; she was always teasing him. She knew he wasn’t comfortable with public displays of affection, hence she never pushed for him to show everyone how he felt. She knew he loved her, even if he had never said the words to her, he made sure she knew. 

“It was the other way around, lady.” The chuckle that escaped her was everything to him.  He decided to glare at the boy beside her to try and make him stop staring at him and his woman. “But,” he shrugged as he accepted the plate she was giving him, “they just like to think I’m as friendly as Murphy, just cause we look alike.”

“Stop,” Carol told him sternly as she put a hand on his arm, “Give the stranger sanctuary, keeping people fed, you're gonna have to learn to live with the love.”

Daryl rolled his eyes, stealing a glance at her as they stood together while he ate his breakfast. “I need to show you something,” she pushed her elbow into his side softly, and he just ate his share a little faster. 

“Patrick, do you want to take over?”

“Of course, ma’am.” Daryl glared at the boy as he saw the way he looked at Carol with adoration, just as he turned his eyes onto him. “Mr. Dixon?” Daryl just raised an eyebrow as the boy stuttered slightly. “I just wanted to thank you for bringing in the deer the other day, and the rabbits this morning; they’re a real treat sir.” The boy swallowed as if he was trying to talk himself into saying what came next, “It would be a real honor to be able to shake your hand.”

Daryl watched him as he put out his hand to shake his, shooting Carol a slightly panicked look only to notice she was barely containing her laughter. He looked back at the boy before he sucked on each of his fingers, getting rid of the food he still had there before shaking the boy’s hand. He could see Carol’s shoulder shake slightly from where he was, knowing she wanted to laugh but was too polite to do so in the boy’s face. 

“You’re terrible,” Carol finally said as the two of them walked towards the inner gate, once they were out of prying eyes. “Poor Patrick.”

“Poor Patrick,” Daryl muttered rolling his eyes his voice a little higher as he tried to mimic her. “How about poor me?”

“He has a little bit of a crush, Pookie, a little hero worship.”

“I ain’t no hero.”

Her hand on his arm stopped him as they approached the fence, making him turn to look at her. “You’re plenty of hero,” there was just a softness to her voice that he couldn’t shake. The smile on his face was automatic as he looked down at her. “You’re my hero.”

He knew he was blushing, he looked everywhere but at her as he tried to make himself stop blushing before anyone saw him. He was surprised when her small hands went to the lapels of his worn down vest and pulled him down for a kiss. 

He lost himself in the kiss, moaning once her tongue entered his mouth. It was over too soon, and he was left slightly breathless. 

“About the run today, I don’t think we have enough people to spare for you to take.”

“What?”

“Back to earth Declan, today, the run, not enough people.”

“If you wanted my whole attention you shouldn’t have done that,” Daryl muttered as he moved to stand behind her, sneaking a look around and once he was sure they were alone pulling her back to his front, rubbing his hard on against her back. He knew she was probably preening at the fact that he was in that state, and he couldn’t really be mad at her for that. 

“I’m sorry, Pookie.” She moved away, turning to look at him. Her face was back to business and he tried to focus his attention on the real matter at hand. “We had a build up overnight, they’re not spreading anymore.”

He looked over her shoulder, watching as their people killed walker after walker at the outer fence. “Not even using Connor’s thing?”

“I’m not using Connor’s  _ thing _ for that!”

Daryl realized what he had said, blushing bright red. “Stop.”

Carol chuckled, shaking her head sadly as she moved to stand shoulder to shoulder with him. “Not even using that.”

“With more of us here, we’re calling more of them. It’s worse than last month.” Daryl nodded along her, trying to forget what had happened last month. They had lost good people; Murphy had almost gotten bit trying to save someone. “If enough of them pile up, well you know.”

Daryl sighed, giving her a small smile as he felt her small hand in the crook his arm. “Alright, so I’ll just take Glenn, Michonne, Zach and Sasha for this.” The fact that the three of them were not separating was a given. 

“That’s fair, just come back to me in one piece Pookie, all three of you.”

“Nine lives, remember?”

.-.-.-

“I knew I would find you here.” Connor opened his eyes as he heard the voice coming from behind him. “Hey JC.” Connor raised his head from where he had it down in prayer, looking at the open doorway of the room he had set up as a chapel of some sorts. Daryl was standing at the opening, looking warily at the crosses and other saints that lined the walls. 

 

“Aren’t you about to burst into flames or something?” Connor teased his brother as he stood up from where he was kneeling, making the sign of the cross before putting his rosary inside his clothes as if it was a second nature. 

“Nah, I got some influences now.” Connor chuckled as he and Daryl shared a smile. They would probably never agree on their beliefs, but Daryl was the one person that had helped him the most when setting up his small space together. His brother was just so full of contradictions, but Connor couldn’t imagine him not being like that. 

“We ready to head out?” The run they were going that day was exactly the reason why he had chosen to spend a few extra minutes down there. 

It had been hard, with everything that had happened to keep his faith as strong as it had always been. As soon as the problem with the Governor finally ran its course, or as much as it did without them ever finding it, he had made sure he made his peace with his own mind. 

The world was a harsher place than ever, but he never lost faith in God, and in his teachings. He and Murphy still went and did their own little service every morning, praying to their saints and the Holy Mother of God as often as they had always done it. But if something had changed for them back in Boston all those years ago, it had changed even more after what had happened the year before. 

“Carol asked me to take only the essentials, so it’s going to be more covert operation.”

“Our specialty.”

“Not according to Murphy.”

“Let me tell you something, brother,” Connor threw an arm around Daryl’s shoulders, pulling him in so only he could hear him as the two of them made their way outside. “believe only half of what that ejit says, he’s a liar.”

“You know God is everywhere, dear brother,” Daryl couldn’t help but smirk as Murphy appeared as it seemed out of nowhere to join them. “So you shouldn’t lie.”

Daryl tried to ignore the stares they got as the three of them made their way towards where their weapons and cars were. It was hard. His brothers thrived to be the center of attention, Murphy more than Connor, and they usually tried to rope him into their antics. He wasn’t there yet. He was more open, with them, with Carol, and to a lighter level with all of their extended family. But there were many strangers in the prison now, and he hated how he got stared at half of the time. 

Although more than half was because Murphy had yet again convinced them of his guilt at something he had been the one to do. 

“Is it almost time?” It always surprised Daryl how his brothers could go from goofing around to head in the game in such a short time, as well as how they were able to fight even in the direst situations. 

Daryl only nodded, silently starting to carry what they were going to need towards their vehicles. They would take their truck, as well as another one so they could haul what they expected to be a good loot. 

“Are we taking the kid?” Connor asked, squinting  as the sun hit him in the face while the two of them saw Zach move down towards them, a smile on his face. 

“He’s good, he’s ready.”

“Alright.” Connor pat him on the back before continuing his work. It was nice, to have people, to have family that trusted his choices and didn’t fight him every step of the way. 

Daryl looked up when he heard a wolf whistle, glaring at Murphy where he was standing by the truck laughing at someone thinking for a moment it was at him. Connor motioned with his head behind him, and he looked over his shoulder to see Beth and Zach kissing. He was happy for the kid. 

“Damn romance novel,” Daryl’s tone was gruff as usual, but there was a underhand teasing tone to it that his brothers caught on immediately. 

“Oh Bella, don’t go!” Murphy followed up as he jumped into the back of the truck, pretending to swoon as Zach looked up at him. 

“Shut up.” Zach was trying not to laugh as he watched Murphy. 

“Been there, tried that, it did not take.” Daryl threw a bag to his brother as he muttered the words to Zach, hiding his smile behind a scowl as he continued to check everything was ready. 

“Hey there!” Daryl didn’t look up from what he was doing, noticing that Connor had taken a few steps towards the newcomer’s voice, Bob. 

“I’ve been thinking that I need to start earning my keep around here.” Connor looked at the man standing in front of the two trucks, there was something there that he wasn’t sure he was completely sure he trusted about him. 

“The boys,” Sasha motioned towards the back where the Murphy and Connor were opening staring at him as Daryl continued to move around, “just found you last week Bob, you can take it easy.”

“That’s a week of meals, of a roof under my head.”

“Este cabrón quiere algo,” Connor muttered to Murphy in Spanish as they continued to watch as Bob tried to talk the crew into joining them. 

“Te da mala espina?” The two of them moved slightly to make space in between them for Daryl, as he joined them. They had found out, that although not fluent as they were, Daryl had that easiness with languages that they did. His Spanish was rather good from hanging around Latinos half his life. 

The three of them looked on as Bob continued to try and convince the rest of their team. Glenn stole a look at Daryl, as if expecting him to make the final decision. With a pat on Murphy’s stomach Daryl took off towards the inside of the prison; he needed to say goodbye.

“Carol needs all the help we can get, if you want to earn your keep, go and kill some geeks at the fence.” Daryl could feel the eyes of almost everyone following him, but he didn’t care. They were already taking Tyreese, the man having approached his sister earlier and asking to come along, he knew Carol was right, they needed to have people here in case something happened. 

Daryl made his way towards the innards of the prison, knowing his brothers were not far behind. It was their little tradition, they always said goodbye before a run; and she always was the first one to greet them when they returned. 

He found her where he knew she would be, her schedule imprinted on his mind always. “Hey,” Daryl said as he knocked on the doorframe, watching as her head popped up from behind one of the bookcases that he had helped drag in to make up her library. 

“You ready to go?” Carol asked as she made her way towards him, her hands immediately moving to embrace him as soon as she was close enough to do so. 

He nodded as he buried his face against her neck, breathing her in. He was still in awe sometimes that he was able to have this, have her in his life. He could hear his brothers’ steps as they approached, and chose to give her one last squeeze before pulling back. His forehead dropped to touch hers, he looked at her small smile and closed eyes. “Be safe.”

“Nine lives, remember?” Daryl moved his mouth so he was able to kiss her softly as soon as she muttered the words that had become their own, somewhat. The kiss was short, and sweet, he was still not comfortable enough in broad daylight where everyone could just barge in. His affections were his own, and as long as she and his brothers knew how much they meant for him, fuck everyone else. 

He tried not to laugh as he realized that Murphy had practically latched himself onto Carol’s back as they had been embracing; he moved back allowing his brother to say his goodbyes. He watched with a smile on his face as he saw Murphy come in and smother Carol with kisses all over her face, making her laugh as she tried to stop him. 

His family was sure something. He knew that Carol got weird looks from a lot of the other people living around the prison, especially the elders. She was practically living with three men, and no one other than them knew what happened behind closed doors. Unlike what a lot of people assumed, he was not stupid; but he also knew that he didn’t especially care. If they were happy, and they were, if she didn’t mind, which she didn’t… everyone could fuck off for all he cared. 

While he had been lost inside his mind, Carol had finally gotten Murphy to leave her alone long enough for her to draw Connor into a longer embrace. Murphy had moved to his side, they were standing shoulder to shoulder as they watched Connor and Carol lose themselves in their embrace. The identical brothers were wearing identical smiles as they watched their older brother and their woman hug each other. 

Daryl liked to think each of them brought something different into Carol’s life, that they each filled a small space that no one else could. He was her rock, the unmovable force against anything their life threw at them; Murphy was the levity, it was no secret that he was usually the one that was able to make her laugh almost at will; while Connor brought her peace. 

With one last kiss to each of them, and after giving the sign of the cross to both Murphy and Connor; she returned to her own chores, unable to watch them walk away. 

.-.-.-

“Look at that, seems like Dick Grimes is trying to flirt.” Daryl chuckled as he slowed down the truck so they were stopping right by where Michonne was standing with Rick.

“Look who’s back!” Michonne looked inside the truck, shaking her head as she saw the three men looking at her. 

“Didn’t find him.”

Daryl nodded as he looked forward, before looking back out at her. “I’m glad to see you back in one piece.”

“And I’m definitely glad to see more than one piece.” Daryl groaned as he heard Murphy’s words, dropping his head against the wheel as if trying to forget he had ever heard his brother say that. 

The chuckle from Michonne made Connor and Daryl looked back out to the woman, while Murphy just wiggled his eyebrows at her. Michonne chuckled once more before sighing, moving to rest her forearms against the window where Murphy was, looking at Daryl from there. 

“I’m thinking of going to Macon, look for him there.”

“It’s over 70 miles of walkers from here to there.” Connor glared at Rick from the back window as he saw the man ogling Michonne’s ass from where he was standing behind him, unhappy with the fact that the windows were tinted and the former deputy couldn’t see him. 

“You might run into some unneighborly types, is it worth it?” Daryl was looking right in her eyes, and she could see that he meant it. 

“Andrea is missing you something bad, do you want to leave her alone yet again?” Murphy added softly, just loud enough for her and his brother to hear. 

Michonne nodded solemnly, taking a deep breath as she moved back to give Rick room to look at Daryl. Daryl had to frown to keep the smile that wanted to appear on his face as Murphy tensed up when Rick got close to him; his brother did not like Rick Grimes, at all. 

“We’re heading for that big spot, the one I told you about.” He could hear Connor huffing in the back, the habit of telling Rick what they were doing like they had done most of the last year was one hard to break. 

“I’m going to check the snares, try and get anything we caught before the walkers get them.” Daryl nodded to the other man, moving to change gears and start the truck once again. 

“I’m going with you,” Michonne said suddenly, moving to open the back door of the truck and climbing in as Connor move over to make space for her.

“But you just got back!” Murphy winked at Carl as the young boy almost stomped his feet from where he was standing by the horse Michonne had claimed as her own. 

“I’ll bring her back to you, deputy.” Murphy chose to ignore the glare he got from Rick as he watched Carl smile at him, “and I’ll see if I can smuggle something for our next wager.”

Without waiting for anything else, Daryl put the truck into drive. They had a long day ahead of them.

.-.-.-.

Carol looked out the window of the library as she waited for the kids to start coming in. They had left not that long ago, and she knew the store was at least an hour away. She sighed as she heard the steps of the kids running down the hallway, throwing out a prayer for her boys before her attention was occupied by the littlest habitants. 

It had been Murphy’s idea for her to do this. It was also a way for her to kind of train the kids in secret from Rick and the rest of the council. Sometimes it was surprising how well her men knew her, and this was one of those things. When the subject of schooling for the kids in the prison had come up, it had actually been Daryl who proposed her for that. 

She felt a pang in her heart every time she saw one of them smile at her, especially like Molly and Mika, reminding her so much of her Sophia. But it was exactly because of that, as both Daryl and Murphy had told her, that she needed to do this. She had so much love to give, and those kids needed some kind of normalcy in their lives. And if that normalcy came from knowing how to defend themselves, there was no one better than her to teach them. She who had been as defenseless as they were. 

“Ma’am…” her attention was taken by Patrick, as the teen raised his hand as if he had been in an actual classroom. “I’m not feeling really good; I was wondering if I could be excused.”

“Sometimes you will have to run, have to escape from a situation while you’re not exactly feeling at your best, Patrick.”

The teen grimaced, nodding at her words. She noticed that he did looked more pale than usual. “I just don’t want to puke all over everyone.”

She nodded at him, trying not to laugh at the disgusted faces of the mostly female group in front of her. Movement to her right made her turn and look, a hand already moving towards one of the knives she had in her lap only to stop it when she realized the person standing there was Carl. The boy looked at her, and she couldn’t figure out what was that she saw in his eyes. 

It was just a few minutes later when the lessons were over that Carl finally approached her. She was putting the knives back into where she had been hiding them when he knelt beside her to help clean up. 

“I won’t say anything to my dad.” She hadn’t realized how anxious she was about that until after he had said his due. Rick was still somewhat unstable and as much as he had stepped down from his position of leadership, he still had a lot of pull in the community. 

“Thank you,” she said softly to Carl, looking at him as they finished putting everything away, “you do understand why I’m doing this, right?”

“It’s because of Sophia.” Carl’s face was so sad that she couldn’t help but pull him into a hug. He was growing so fast, not only in height but he was no longer the sweet boy she had met a little over a year ago at the quarry. He was stronger, he was braver, he was everything she knew her Sophia could have been if she had only survived. 

“I miss her; I miss her so much.” Carl let himself go for a moment; he allowed the woman he had come to care for as a second mother hug him in her arms. He had missed this, he missed being hugged, he missed his mother. 

Carol felt as Carl hugged her close, as if trying to hug her with all his strength. She returned the gesture, kissing his hatless forehead. The two of them knelt there in the library for a long while, just feeling. 

-.-.-.-

Murphy loved the moment just before they exited the truck whenever they went out for a run. It wasn’t that he enjoyed risking his ass, or that he enjoyed being the main course on the menu of those things; but he loved to watch the moment where Daryl his baby brother took a step back and Daryl the leader would shine. 

“Are you ready for this brothers?” Connor’s voice from behind Daryl made Murphy turn in his seat slightly to look at him, while he noticed that Connor made eye contact with Daryl through the rearview mirror. He knew they had identical looks of concentration, and without really meaning to, the two of them opened the doors to the truck and jumped down. 

“All right, let’s make a sweep.” Daryl ordered as he cocked back his crossbow, nodding at Connor as he walked through the hole in the fence first, followed closely by the two of them with their guns out and ready. 

“Make sure it’s safe, grab what you can.” Everyone started dispersing, while the three of them stuck together; they had promised their lady after all. 

“The kid is doing good so far,” Connor muttered as they went through what was left of one of the military tents, stabbing corpses in the way just in case. 

“He’s a good kid.” Daryl said; he watched as Zach followed Glenn while the two of them checked another tent. 

“Of course you liking the kid has nothing to do with the fact that kept Beth from following you around, is it?”

Daryl glared at Murphy as he pushed him on his way out of the tent, trying to hide his chuckles at his brother’s words. They were true after all. 

They all reconvened at the doors of the store, pockets fuller than they had been at the start. “We’ll come over tomorrow with more people, once we work out the problem with the fences.” He suddenly hit the glass of the window hard enough to make Tyreese jump slightly, making Murphy and Connor both snicker. 

“I think I got it.” Daryl squinted against the sunlight as he turned to look at Zach as they waited the usual amount of time to see if there were any walkers inside. Connor was resting his shoulder against the window beside him, taking out a cigarette from one of his pockets and a lighter from the other, taking a long drag before passing it to Daryl. 

“You got what?” Michonne was looking from Zach to Daryl, a look of amusement in her eyes. 

“I’ve been trying to guess what Daryl used to do before the turn.”

“He’s been trying for good six weeks now,” Daryl said as he took another drag before passing the cigarette to Murphy. “He hasn’t gotten even close.”

“That’s because he’s not thinking on the right track, brother.” Daryl squinted his eyes knowing that whatever was coming was not going to be good for him; this was Murphy after all. “He’s thinking more straight and narrow instead of glittery and oily.” 

“Asshole.”

“Like his ugly mug would get any attention.” Connor added as he finished the cigarette they had been passing back and forth. “Look at that, no one would ever pay to see that.”

“That’s my same ugly mug!” Daryl couldn’t help but shake his head, a small smile on his face as his siblings continued to bicker between them. 

“I’m pacing myself,” Zach said to Michonne, trying not to laugh as Murphy continued ranting about his ugly mug to Connor, “I’m taking one shot a day.”

“And he ain’t exactly a straight shooter,” Daryl muttered, looking at Connor and Murphy before turning his eyes back to Zach. “Reckon we should tell Hershel he ain’t have anything to worry about?”

“Have you tried guessing stand-up comedian?” Michonne asked Zach as they all tried to hide their amusement at what Daryl had said.

“Nah,” Zach shrugged keeping eye contact with Daryl, “You are thoughtful, you are part of the council, you help people, but still you are kind of surly.”

“Kind of?” Murphy laughed again when Daryl slapped Connor in the stomach hard enough to make him gasp for air. 

“So I’m going to say, homicide cop.”

Zach tried not to frown as both Connor and Murphy started laughing, loudly. “I take that as a no?”

Daryl shrugged, the corner of his mouth rising as if he was trying not to smile. “They just can’t believe you got it right.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, undercover. Boston.” That shut his brothers up. “I just don’t like to talk about it, too much shit, ya know?”

“Really?”

The three brothers busted out laughing, destroying Zach’s hopes that he had gotten it right. “I’ll just keep on trying.”

“You do that, heartthrob, you do that.”

The sound of a walker slamming his decaying body against the window where Daryl was resting against made them all sober up. It was time for them to do their jobs. 

The brothers looked at each other as the doors were opened, Daryl’s bolt went flying to the first of the walkers as Michonne pushed her way inside slitting the two others’ head with her katana. 

“I want one of those,” Connor muttered to Murphy elbowing him on the side as he looked at Michonne like she was a mirage. 

“Continue looking at her like that, and I’m telling on your ass.” 

“Shut up, Murphy.” They all separated as they made their way inside the store. They were there only on a recon mission, to know what was where and in what amounts. 

Daryl took off on his own, Zach fast on his heels; as Connor and Murphy moved in tandem in another aisle. 

“Clear!” Daryl yelled as he reached the end of the aisle, looking at his brothers as they exited the one next to his. 

“Clear!” 

The sound of the rest of their group claiming the store clear reached their ears, and they seemed to relax a little bit. 

They all moved silently around the store, lists were out as one person of each couple would fill the one bag each as they had decided they were taking back for now. Things like milk for Judith, female products and condoms were a priority. 

“What the fuck?” Zach muttered as he reached his hand to touch the top of his head, looking up as he realized water was dripping from the ceiling. He caught Daryl’s attention, pointing up for him to follow his signal. 

Daryl looked up, frowning as he noticed the huge stain in the ceiling. “What the hell…” he started walking towards where Zach was, yelping when he slipped and crashed into the younger man, sending both of them into one of the shelves.

The sound of the shelve going down, the crystal jars on the other side crashing loudly against the floor, made everyone raise their weapons, pointing at where Zach and Daryl were trying to right each other. 

Daryl grunted as he took the hand that suddenly was within his eyesight, letting Connor pull him up. “Is this how’s it going to be, brother? Are you now falling for him?” Daryl glared at Murphy as his brother helped Zach up. 

“Are you going to break poor Beth’s heart? Are you trying to rob the cradle?” Murphy had an arm around Zach’s shoulders, enjoying every second of the look on Daryl’s face. 

“Shut-“

A sudden crash behind them made the four of them jump away and raise their weapons once again. 

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Connor yelled as everyone gathered around them, watching as a walker hanged from its entrails from the ceiling snarling at them. 

“I think we should all get out of there,” Glenn muttered as he side-eyed Daryl where he was grimacing while they all watched. 

“Let’s move it people!” Daryl said as he started backing away from the walker, not letting it leave his sight. 

A crash to their right, followed to another one to their left had the small group looking from one side to the other. And then, walkers started falling into the store like it was raining. 

“Fuck!” Daryl heard Murphy yell shortly followed by another huge crash, as he let one of his bolts fly, killing one of the walkers that had made it to his feet after the fall. 

“Murph!” Daryl yelled looking over his shoulder to the last place he had seen his brother at, “Connor!” The sounds of the walkers continuing to fall, as well as the other members of his group were the only noises he heard. “Murphy! Connor!”

“Daryl!” the person calling for him wasn’t either one of his siblings; it was Zach who was trying to catch his attention from a few aisles away. “I need help! Daryl!”

Zach’s voice was panicked, and it only pushed Daryl to shorten the distance faster. He still couldn’t see his brothers anyway, and the moment he jumped over one of the tipped shelves he found why. The sound he had heard before had been a walker crashing over a shelf, a shelf next to where Murphy and Connor had been, a shelf that had tipped sideways and trapped his brothers under it. 

He could see Connor’s feet moving as he tried to get under it, towards where he could only guess Murphy was. Zach was trying to pull the shelf up, not being strong enough to even move it a little bit. Daryl pushed the boy away, crouching down to get enough grip and yelled as he started to stand up. He closed his eyes, trying to hold on as much as he could. He could hear something that sounded like a shout, and he wasn’t sure it wasn’t coming from him. 

“Daryl!” He could hear someone yelling for him, but he couldn’t pay attention to anything else. His brothers were under the shelf and they needed him to get out. “Daryl, come on!” He finally opened his eyes to see Zach trying to pull him away as he shot a walker that had gotten too close. 

“Daryl! I need you!” The moment he heard Connor’s voice to his back, he dropped the shelf noticing how a walker had gotten squashed under it. Quickly he made his way to Murphy’s free side, trying not to panic even more as he saw that his brother was bleeding from his head and was hanging limply from Connor’s arm. He pushed himself under Murphy’s free side, and together he and Connor ran while shooting with their free hands at the walkers that got in their way. 

They didn’t stop to wait for anyone else, expecting everyone to follow their lead. The two brothers dragged the unconscious Murphy to the back seat of the truck, letting Michonne and Zach climb in the front. Daryl didn’t spare a look at the store as Michonne drove away from the place, there were more important things to worry about. 

-.-.-

Carl had stayed close to her the rest of the day. She had been done with the children after their lessons, and the young man had kept her company. Half hiding from his father’s attempts at normalcy, half in need of some kind of real normalcy that came with him doing chores and helping her with the mundane tasks that were part of their everyday life in the prison. 

The two of them looked at each other with a smile when they heard the sound of motors coming from the road as he helped her put some of the clothes she had taken care of earlier that day to dry. With a chuckle, Carol watched as the boy that acted so much older most of the time ran towards the gate waiting impatiently for the return of the members of their family. 

The moment she saw that it was Michonne driving the truck, and not Daryl she knew something had gone terribly wrong. Her heart started beating frantically as she ran towards them, her hand covering her mouth to try and stifle the cry that left her as she first saw Daryl jump down the back of the truck. 

He looked like he had aged ten years from when he had left that morning. He was pale, and she wasn’t sure it wasn’t blood what was covering his shirt. He didn’t look at anyone, but turned back immediately to catch Murphy as Connor helped him get him off the back of the truck. 

Connor’s eyes sought hers in the multitude that had quickly gathered around them, and she pushed people out of her way until she was right next to her boys. The two of them had the still unconscious Murphy between them, hanging like a rag doll his neck bobbing up and down. 

Quickly but silently they moved him inside, directly to what had now been conditioned as the medbay. Someone, probably Carl, had alerted Hershel and Doctor S of their arrival and the three of them were quickly pushed away from the patient. 

Carol immediately wrapped herself around Connor. He was tense but responsive, hugging her back tightly. She soon felt Daryl’s hand in her back, and all she could do was unwrap one of her arms from around Connor and hold it out for him without leaving Connor’s arms. She felt as Daryl entwined their fingers, and held on tight, as tight as either of them were able to. 

“What happened, son?” Hershel’s voice was calm, and the three of them appreciated that enormously. 

“A walker,” Connor stopped for a moment to take a breath, “it tipped a huge shelf, and it fell on top of him.” 

“The thing weighed a fuckton,” Daryl murmured as he moved closer to his family, his chest against Carol’s back. “It must have hit his head first.”

“And the blood?”

“Blood?” Carol felt the both of them stiffen beside her, apparently they hadn’t noticed him bleeding. 

“There,” Hershel said to the Doctor, as they cutted Murphy’s pants on his right leg up until the knee. Carol felt like she was in a dream, like she couldn’t react other than watch and wait for the verdict. 

“Is he bit?” Daryl was the first one to say what they had all been thinking. 

“No, he’s not.” Connor said, hugging Carol closer to him and shaking his head not looking at the doctors. “He’s not.” 

Daryl couldn’t meet his brother’s eyes, he knew Connor was trying to make eye contact but he just couldn’t. The thought that Murphy, their Murphy, could have been bitten was just too much. 

“No.” Three pairs of eyes focused immediately on Doctor S as he looked at the blood oozing from Murphy’s shin. “He must have hit his shin with the shelf as it fell, the cut is clean and it looks more like a scrape than anything.”

A groan coming from the man on the table made everyone shut up and wait. Murphy opened his eyes slowly, blinking a couple of times as he seemed to try and focus on what was in front of him. 

“Murph?” Connor was the first one to talk, as well as the first one to approach Murphy. Carol let him go, knowing that he was the one that needed this the most. Daryl immediately put an arm around her waist, pulling her to his front. She sighed as she rested her weight against him for a moment, knowing that it brought as much comfort to her as it did to him. “Murphy?”

“Con?” Murphy’s voice sounded disoriented with just a touch of fear in it, and it made Carol want to burst out crying. 

“I’m here, you wob.” Connor’s voice broke as he grasped Murphy’s hand in his, bringing it to his mouth and kissing the back of it. 

“What happened? Where’s Decks?”

Daryl pushed himself and Carol forward as they heard Murphy ask for him, the two of them smiling as Murphy’s eyes fell upon them and a smile, combined with a grimace, appeared on his face. “Why are you looking like you’re about to cry, beautiful lady?”

“Maybe because you scared the shit out of her, you asshole.” Daryl spoke for the first time since Murphy woke up, the tone in his voice was the one they knew it was only theirs. “Of all of us.”

Connor let go of him and moved back, allowing Hershel and the doctor to check him over. His left hand was soon grasped in both of Carols, and her head was resting on his shoulder as the three of them watched as the doctors cleared Murphy. 

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

“It was raining walkers, Aleluyah!” 

Connor, Murphy, and Carol couldn’t help but laugh at the stupidity of the comment. They knew Murphy was going to be alright. 

It wasn’t long before Murphy was released to their care, with the instructions of getting him to rest and to go get any of them if he started presenting any other symptoms. The cut on his shin was in fact a bad scrape, and there was nothing to do other than clean it and keep it clean since their stash of antibiotics was currently running low.  

That night when the four of them went to bed, each of them went to sleep thinking of how lucky they had all been. They had been given one more day to love each other, one more day to enjoy what they had been given. And as they muttered their goodnights, they just held each other a little bit tighter, a little bit closer. And they fell asleep feeling loved, feeling like they were right where they belonged. 


	2. Infected

**Chapter II**

**Infected**

 

Murphy sighed as he heard the sound of Rick’s alarm clock ring. “Turn it off,” he muttered as he burrowed his face closer to Carol’s neck, grunting as he tried to keep her from moving away when she started to rise.

“No,” Murphy whined, still eyes closed as he refused to give Carol a chance to get up. “Stay.”

“People need to eat, Muffin,” her tone was soft and she stopped her struggling for a moment, letting herself be pulled back into his warm embrace.

“And we all know what happens when someone other than her is in charge of food,” Daryl said his eyes closed as he laid on Murphy’s other side avoiding touching his brother. It was too damned hot for touching, especially since both of them seemed to sweat like pigs.

“I don’t care,” Murphy’s voice was muffled from where he was hiding his face in Carol’s neck. “Everyone can starve for all I care.”

“I second that.” Daryl mutters which made Carol chuckle, knowing that out of the three the one that would be willing to wake up incredibly early to go and hunt for the people he didn’t even like, was him.

“Aww, Decks,” Connor moved until he was flushed against Carol’s front, a wicked smile on his face as he looked down at her. “Are you telling me, that you don’t care if anyone starves? Really?”

“Shut up.” Daryl’s response made Carol raise her eyebrows in question at Connor, whose smile just got even more wide.

“Are you telling me that you wouldn’t care if Beth starved? Sweet innocent Beth? Sweet cuddly Beth?”

“Shut up.” Carol could almost hear Daryl’s blush in his words.

“What is he talking about, Pookie? Are you looking for greener pastures?”

“What?!” The indignation in Daryl’s tone made it hard for Carol to keep herself from laughing, she had to resort to hide her face against Connor’s chest to try and muffle the sound. “What? I don’t, what?”

“What is Connor talking about, Decks?” Murphy’s tone was serious for once, and Daryl had no idea what to do. Connor looked over at him and found him sitting with his back against the wall, looking paler than he should.

“I don’t know!” Daryl’s voice was higher as he answered.

“I saw her hugging you last night.” The joke was up, and as soon as he saw Daryl’s face start flaming, his laughter couldn’t be helped anymore. His laughter in turn got Carol, and Murphy going.

“You are all a bunch of assholes.” Daryl muttered as he tried to climb over the pile of people between him and the exit, only to grunt when hands grabbed him and forced him into the middle of the pile without consideration of where he exactly landed.

“Even I, Pookie?” Somehow he had ended up face to face with Carol, and he couldn’t exactly say he had any problems with that.

“You are the biggest one of them all.”

-.-.-.

Carol had left after all. After a few kisses, and some making up to do, she had left the three brothers behind as she went to do the work that was so important for the whole place to be able to stand.

“How are you feeling, Murph? Really?” Daryl didn’t raise his eyes from where he was fiddling with some of the new arrows he had been able to get his hands on, knowing that even if Murphy wasn’t as bad as he was, he wasn’t a fan of making a big deal out of his injuries.

“No headache, no dizziness, nothing.”

“You scared the shit out of us.” There were things that as much as a unit the four of them were, that they just kept for each other. Carol was a worrier, she worried so much about everyone, and it was even worse with the people she loved; so they had realized quite soon that it was better to not exactly lie to her about their injuries… but just try not to worry her as much. So they all knew Murphy could in fact be undermining what was wrong with him.

“I’m honest, other than the bruises and the pain from my leg. I’m good.”

Daryl was about to answer when the first shot rang out. Three pair of blue eyes connected, and without saying a word the three of them jumped into action.

Connor threw Murphy his guns, running out and behind Daryl as soon as he did so. Sasha and Tyreese were leaving their cells armed as well. “We follow the protocols!” Daryl barked at them, pointing to one side, and then to the other watching as his brothers and the Williams siblings moved to different parts of the block.

“Hershel! Beth!” Daryl yelled for the two of them, pushing away the blanket covering their door as he made his way to their cell.

“We know, go!” Hershel yelled as he started getting up, reaching for his prosthetic as Beth clutched Judith closer to her chest.

Daryl didn’t need to be told twice, he waited until his brothers were through having closed the other door before closing and locking that door. Locking Hershel, Beth and Judith inside where it was safe.

The five of them ran out towards the inner yard as soon as they made sure the breach wasn’t coming from within the tombs.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Connor yelled as he pushed Murphy to move faster keeping close to Daryl.

“We locked the doors to the tombs, Hershel is on watch!” Sasha yelled at Rick as the finally made it to the yard.

“It ain’t a breach!” Daryl yelled as he ran behind Rick, taking a moment to notice the fact that Carol was there, joining behind them armed as they made their way into D Block.

“We stick to the plan!” They all followed Sasha’s lead, the one that had any kind of actual training in case of a proper emergency, and the person that had helped draft the contingency plans. They all knew what the plan was, they all knew what they were supposed to be doing.

There was no time to talk, as they all busted into the mayhem that was D Block. Daryl didn’t lose any time as he took a gun from one of the people there, that had just shot one of the walkers there dead.

The brothers stayed close together, the two of them covering whenever Daryl had to stop and reload his bow. “Fucking shit!” Daryl yelled as he had to run between two walkers, knowing that he would be safe, to grab one of the kids before he was bitten.

“Carol!” Daryl yelled as he searched for her, transferring the quivering boy to her arms before returning to his brothers’ side. There were so many. They didn’t stop, trying to help those that were not bitten, taking those that were inside the cells to help them if they could.

And then, there was silence. The only noises were the sniffling coming from inside the cell where they had put all of the children that they had been able to save.

Daryl made a motion for them to go to the second floor, and with Glenn on point, they did. Glenn’s yelp in surprise when a walker reached out of nowhere and grabbed him made everyone raise their weapons.

“Get down!” was all the warning Glenn had, dropping himself to the ground only to hear the sound of Daryl’s bolt flying and the distinct sound it made when it found its target.

Connor patted his brother in the back as they all approached Glenn. “You alright?” Murphy asked as he pulled him up, patting his chest as if trying to help the younger man calm down.

“It’s Patrick.”

There was sorrow in Daryl’s voice that probably only his brothers would have been able to pin point. They knew of the hero worship the boy had had for their brother; they encouraged it up to a point just to watch Daryl squirm. To know that that same boy was now dead? That was definitely something they hadn’t been ready for.

“Let’s spread out,” Glenn said as he started making his way towards the last cell, “we need to make sure.”

Connor watched as Rick started following Daryl immediately, and took a step to follow him, only to meet Daryl’s eyes. His brother shook his head, motioning for him to follow Murphy who had started to look a little bit pale as he made his way towards the stairs. Daryl would be okay, Murphy was just coming out from an injury and might have had over exerted himself.

“Carol?!” Murphy raised his voice as soon as he was on the ground floor, grunting when Connor moved so he had an arm around his waist under his own arm. “I’m okay, Conn.”

“Sure you are, Murph, sure you are,” Connor muttered as he started helping his brother walk towards the entrance of the block, trying not to let his eyes wander to the dead.

“Are you alright, son?” Hershel said as he saw the two of them walking side by side; he was looking over one of the children that had been injured during the attack.

“He just overdid it, old man.” The tone in Connor’s voice was fond, as he gave Hershel a small side smile. “I’m just going to take him back to the block, before coming back to help.”

“Where’s Carol?” Murphy ignored the conversation around him as he tried to move against where Connor was taking him, trying to find their missing Carol.

“I saw her go in there with Ryan,” Karen said as she approached the brothers, “I can help you take him back to the cell block.”

“I don’t need any help,” Murphy muttered as he pushed himself away from Connor, taking a step towards the door before staggering slightly. Karen gave Connor a look, to which the oldest triplet nodded and watched as the woman kept an eye on his brother as he made his way back to their cellblock. Murphy was right, they needed to check on Carol.

Hershel pointed him to the cell that apparently belonged to Ryan Samuels, and Connor made his way to it.

“It’s happening, isn’t it?” an unknown male voice said, and Connor took a step into the room.

“You’re in shock, you need to lay down.” Carol was kneeling by the man’s side; he was pale and sweating profusely and Connor knew just from seeing him that he was not going to make it. He took a couple of more steps, nodding to Carol the moment she turned to look at him once she noticed his presence.

“Lizzie, and Mika.” Connor moved closer to the two of them, until he was able to kneel beside Carol. Ryan didn’t stop looking at her, it was like she was his last hope. “You care about them, I’ve seen it.”

The hand Carol wasn’t using to touch Ryan’s head found Connor’s, and he clutched it as tightly as she clutching his.

“I don’t have anybody else.” Ryan’s voice was breaking, and Connor couldn’t help but look away. The man was dying. He lowered his head and started softly praying, soft enough to be able to continue hearing what was going on around them. “Kids on their own? In this? They don’t stand a chance.”

Connor felt the moment Carol realized what the man was about to ask her, about to ask _them_ really. Her hand was holding so hard that he could feel his bones grate against each other, but he did not pull away; he would never be able to pull away from her. “Could you watch after them?” Ryan’s eyes left Carol’s for the first time, to look at Connor before returning to Carol. “Like they were yours?”

“Yeah, I can.” Carol’s voice was barely above a whisper, and even without looking at her, Connor knew she was crying.

“We will.” Connor added, raising their hands and placing a small kiss over it. He needed her to know that she wasn’t alone, and they would do this, together.

Ryan groaned, closing his eyes and contorting as a wave of pain hit him. Carol tried to help somehow, doing small shushing sounds trying to comfort him but being unable to.

“Ryan,” Carol stopped to swallow, trying to keep the knot she felt in the back of her throat from keeping her from talking, “you need to say goodbye to them, ok?” Her hands were on his face, caressing it as they cried. And in that moment he could see her anguish, Connor could see how the pain from losing Sophia hadn’t really disappeared but it had just turned manageable.

“I’ll go get them,” Connor said softly as he rose from his kneeling position, taking a moment to press his lips to the side of Carol’s head, breathing her in.

He would have thought she hadn’t even noticed him saying anything, if it wasn’t for the light squeeze of her hand as he was about to let go. They were in this together, always.

-.-.-.-

Daryl watched from the catwalk as Connor left D Block; his brother had looked up at the last minute and there was a look on his face that he hadn’t been able to decipher, and that scared him a little. His attention was brought back to the matter at hand as Rick stabbed the walker from the last cell furthest to the right side, with him at his back.

“Daryl,” Rick called out for him, not looking at him as he kept his eyes on the dead man. His hand was back reaching for something, and Daryl knew what it was, throwing the keys to his hands with his precise aim. “Go get Hershel and the Doctor, they’ll want to see this.”

Daryl glared at his back, before turning and quickly but as naturally as he could- trying not to cause even more panic- he made his way down the stairs. He first saw Hershel patiently trying to calm one of the injured children.

“Hershel,” Daryl tried to smile at the crying child, recognizing him as the boy he had grabbed and shoved  at Carol in a hurry. “Rick needs you, and Doctor S.” Hershel, as usual was able to read between lines and hurriedly sent the boy on his way and quickly went to look for the Doctor.

Daryl felt like a weight left his chest as he watched Connor come back in, the two Ryan girls walking in front of him.

“Go on, your Da is right there.” Daryl approached him slowly, together watching as the two girls held hands as they tried to appear as if they weren’t crying.

“He bit?” Connor looked at his brother as he spoke to him, and Daryl could see the anguish at his words. Without saying anything Daryl put an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close to touch his forehead against the side of his head before moving back.

“Carol’s with him.”

“How is she?” They all knew how kind hearted their woman was, and how every loss in a way brought back the pain from her biggest loss of all.

“He asked her to take care of them,” Connor sighed closing his eyes before he used the back of his hand to get rid of the couple of tears that had started to fall. “She said yes.”

“Of course she did,” Daryl said softly, watching the shadows behind the curtain move. The sound of Hershel speaking loudly got his attention, only to see the older man looking at him as if waiting for him.

“Don’t leave her alone.”

“Never.” Daryl heard Connor respond softly as the two parted ways, Connor back into the cell where Carol was, and him leading Hershel and the Doctor back to Rick.

The two men followed him silently, as if already bracing themselves for the worst. Daryl stopped once or twice to make sure Hershel wouldn’t trip as they had to navigate their way over dead bodies, sighing when the men behind him seemed to recognize the dead at their feet.

They finally made it to the last cell, and Daryl let the doctor walk in first.

“No bites,” Rick’s breathing was labored and Daryl couldn’t help but think of the Rick six months before. “No wounds.” He looked around the cell, wincing slightly when he noticed the small details that made each of those cells their own, what made that cell ‘home’ for the dead man at their feet. “I think he died on his own.”

“This here,” Doctor Caleb pointed to the blue tint in the otherwise decomposing skin around the dead man’s mouth, “that blue tone, he suffocated to death.”

“And the blood?” Daryl asked pointing with one of his arrows at the blood on the walker’s chin and shirt.

“He probably started convulsing at one point, he could have bitten his tongue.” Caleb looked over his shoulder to him, shrugging slightly, “that’s the best I can do with what we have.”

“I’ve seen that before,” Rick muttered as he looked up from the dead man, “some of the walkers at the fences, they caught my attention because of the blue.”

“So it’s a walker’s sickness?” Daryl frowned as he realized that Bob had followed them, remembering that the man had medical training too.

“This happened before, either a bacteria or a virus.” Caleb sighed as he stood up.

“Patrick looked good yesterday morning, he was helping Carol with breakfast.” Caleb nodded along Daryl’s words.

“Then probably viral, those are the ones that spread the fastest. Some kind of flu virus would be my guess.”

“Someone locked him just in time.” Daryl threw Hershel a look, like if anything had been done ‘just in time’.

“Nah,” he looked down at the man lying at his feet, a sad upturn of his mouth, “Charlie slept walked, so he would lock himself up before going to bed every night.” Daryl could feel what he now knew was anxiety start to build up in his chest, and he started fidgeting trying to make it go away. “This is fucked up, he was just having barbeque with us yesterday, how can someone die that fast because of a cold?”

“I had a pig that died that fast,” the glare Daryl threw to Rick at the comparison was not noticed by any of them. “I saw a sick boar in the woods.”

“Pigs and birds, ticks and mosquitoes- that’s how most diseases spread.”

“And having so many people in one place? That makes it a perfect target for these things.” Bob looked at them, the calmness in his posture unnerved Daryl. “These things like to run in close quarters, and we can’t get any closer than this.”

“You need to get rid of those pigs,” Hershel said to Rick, watching as the younger man nodded at his words.

“Everyone here, we have all been exposed.”

.-.-.-.

“Hey,” Connor whispered as he gently pushed Mika and Lizzie inside, making fleeting eye contact with Carol before her attention was taken by the two little girls walking in.

He couldn’t see their faces, but he could see Carol’s, and it was heartbreaking. He knew that to them, her face was calm and gave them strength; but to him, he could see the anguish in her eyes.

“Dad?” Mika’s tiny voice seemed to echo in the small cell, as she slowly made his way towards her father’s head. “Daddy?”

“We have to go get Doctor S.” Carol couldn’t do anything but nod sadly at the little girl, as her voice broke looking at Carol like she could make everything alright, like she could just change what was happening in front of them.

“Honey…” Carol took Mika’s hand, squeezing it lightly from where she had backed up to give the girls space, “he’s been bit, the doctor wouldn’t be able to do anything to help him.”

Mika started crying as silently as she was able to, trying to get her small chest to expand enough to get some air through. Connor watched with sadness in his eyes, as the two of them tried to say goodbye to their father.

A slender hand grabbing her brought him back from his own goodbye four years ago, how Murphy had pleaded to Noah not to leave them, how they had lost the father that they had found so late in their life.

“Take care of your sister.”

Connor brought Carol close to his chest as he felt her start shuddering beside him, letting her hide herself in him for a moment. He could feel her tears on his neck, and he just hugged her closer.

“Dad?”

“Dad?”

It was young Mika’s voice that made them finally take a step back- there were things to be done; there were always things to be done.

“No!” “Dad?”

“Come on,” Carol said as she took a couple of steps closer to the girls, putting a hand on each of their shoulders, “you know what I’m supposed to do, what we’re always supposed to do.”

He could see that every movement, every word was just a front. A front to try and keep herself strong for those girls, trying to keep strong for everyone, trying to keep strong for herself.

“You go ahead, love,” Connor took her arm as she was pushing the girls outside, “I’ll do what it needs to be done.”

“Conn, no.”

“Love, you don’t need to do this, let me do this for you.”

“I-“

“Go with the girls, they need you.”

“We’re going to wait outside, ok?” He gave her a small smile as she turned to continue ushering the girls outside, what neither of them expected was for Lizzie to turn and made her way towards Connor.

“We should do it.” Lizzie was standing next to Connor, eyeing the knife he had pulled from his scabbard before looking at a crying Mika.

“No,” Mika stepped back, her voice breaking, her eyes looking for Carol’s. “I can’t.”

“And you don’t have to.” Connor was glad to see that his Carol was breaking through the front she put to others, as she ushered Mika outside, hugging the young girl to her as she started sobbing.

Lizzie watched them go, before turning to look at Connor putting her hand over his on his knife. “Lizzie, are you sure?” There was something entirely wrong with the situation, and Connor wasn’t exactly sure what to do about it.

“Carol taught us, I can do it.” There were no tears in her eyes, there was a strange calmness in her whole disposition that to be honest freaked the fuck out of Connor entirely.

“It needs to be done right now,” Connor tried to dissuade her. It was her father after all; he would not take whatever weird thing the girl needed as closure but there was just something not right with this scenario. “It can’t wait.”

There was an easiness with how the girl approached her father’s body, that he had seen a couple of times before. There was this complete lack of emotion that took him back to that same man he had just been thinking before. They needed to watch over that little girl, he just knew there was something more going on there.

Connor’s knife fell from Lizzie’s hands as the girl started to hyperventilate, before she turned on her heel and sprinted out of the room. He knew Carol was right outside, she would be able to catch her; there was a task to be done right there.

He sighed as he knelt at the man’s bedside, closing his eyes in reverence as he plunged the knife into the man’s skull. He stood there for a moment longer, praying for him, praying for his daughters, praying for them all.

-.-.-.

Murphy opened one eye as he heard movement outside their cell, he had been shadowed by Karen all the way up to the entrance of the block where he had gotten rid of her before getting his ass off to their bed and nodding off for a bit.

He wasn’t trying to do too much, while his leg did ache he felt generally alright. Connor worried too much sometimes, that was just it.

“You have to be quiet, alright?” Murphy moved so he was pushing himself up using his arms as he heard Carol’s voice right outside. “Murphy was hurt last night, and he needs to get better.”

“I’m perfectly fine woman, no need to whisper.” Murphy tried to make sense of how bad the situation from the way Carol was carrying herself as she pushed the blanket away and entered their cell, he immediately knew something was not right. “What’s wrong?” Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and there must have been something in his face because she was fast to reassure him that his siblings were alright.

“Daryl is with Rick and Hershel, and Connor is waiting for us outside the block; I just needed to find a place where Lizzie and Mika could get some alone time without anyone bothering them.” She looked dead tired, Murphy held out his hand for her to help him up and used that to his advantage to pull her close to him once he was standing up.

“What happened?” He whispered into her ear, keeping her close as he felt her chest constrict a couple of times as if she was trying to keep herself from starting to cry again.

“I can’t explain more than once, and I need Connor,” Carol said as she pulled back, putting a hand on Murphy’s cheek before stretching to place a peck on his lips. “I love you.”

She didn’t give him a chance to say the words back, before she was pulling him behind her. “You can take a nap in there,” Murphy looked down at the still crying Mika and at the rather stoic Lizzie, “I need to talk to the council, but you’ll be able to get some peace and quiet in there. Remember what I taught you, ok?”

Lizzie nodded, not looking at either of them before she pushed the blanket away and walked into their room. Mika, while Murphy had been watching her sister, had launched herself into Carol’s arms and was hugging her as hard as her little arms allowed. Murphy could see the tears making their way down her chubby cheeks, and he couldn’t help but feel bad for the little girl. The little girl that he knew reminded Carol so much of her own little girl.

Mika didn’t say a word as she finally let Carol go and moved to follow her sister inside. Murphy watched as she stood just outside the cell, as if bracing herself for something and he found that curious. She must have felt his eyes on her because she turned slightly, and he gave her a sad smile that she returned; that girl had one of the sunniest dispositions he had ever seen and it hurt to see her little face so overwhelmed by whatever had happened before.

Finally, she took a deep breath before entering their room, and once Carol made sure the two of them were settled they finally made their way towards the tombs to join his siblings. Hand in hand they walked together, not giving a fuck about anyone seeing them. There were times when that mattered, and that moment wasn’t one of them.

“Took you two forever to get here,” Connor muttered as he hugged the two of them when they entered his praying space. That was one room they knew they would be left alone for a while, especially after what had happened that morning.

Carol didn’t comment on how Connor kept his arms around them for longer than usual, she understood, or at least she thought she did, what he was going through. “Love you Conn,” she whispered to him as he rested his head against hers, her words soft and only for him. His arms tightening around her waist let her know he had heard it, and she knew that was his way of letting her know how much he loved her too. Her three boys were a mess when it came to emotions, all of them were if she was honest.

The sound of the door locking behind them let them all know that the last missing piece of their little family had finally arrived. Carol disentangled herself from the hug with Connor and Murphy and made her way to Daryl. Just like there was always going to be a special relationship between Murphy and Connor that Daryl nor her would ever be able to touch, there was just something between her and Daryl that was just theirs; and that didn’t mean she loved the other two any less.

Carol felt like she was finally complete, like she could finally breathe fully as Daryl’s strong arms pulled her close. He was hugging her tightly and her hands immediately went to tangle in his hair as he hid his face in the side of her neck. She felt movement at her back, and the rest of the anxiety in Daryl seemed to disappear as he felt his brother's’ hands patting him softly over his back.

“It’s bad,” Daryl looked up from where he had been hiding in Carol to look at his brothers in the eyes, “things are going to get bad, fast.”

“What do you mean, brother?” Connor asked as the four of them finally moved to sit on the bench they had dragged in there so whoever wanted to come to pray could sit and contemplate.

Daryl didn’t sit, choosing to stand and pace in front of the three of them. “Patrick wasn’t bit; he was sick.”

They all heard the sharp intake of breath coming from Carol, the boy had been part of the orphans they had taken in and in a way she had felt responsible for them; if they let her she would feel responsible for every single one of them, adults and children alike. Murphy moved his hand until he was grasping one of hers, letting her pull their joint hands so she could cradle them to her chest.

“He was not feeling well yesterday, I tried to push him to fight through it.”

Daryl shook his head, trying to come up with the words to express to her what he wanted to; but as usual the words wouldn’t make enough sense inside of his head for him to actually say them. He turned his eyes to Connor, only to have his oldest brother give him a small smile and nod at him.

“Don’t even think about it, love,” Connor’s voice was steady and Daryl couldn’t help but being a little jealous of his brother and his capacity to say what he wanted and not come out as a mangled mess, “this is not your fault, you did nothing wrong.” His eyes met Daryl’s as he put an arm around Carol, squeezing her between him and Murphy; he got this, they were a team and he got this.

“Did we lose someone? One of ours?” Murphy words reminded them, that as much as they liked and cared for the people from Woodbury, they were not ‘their’ people.

“No.” Daryl moved slowly, crouching in front of Carol, putting his hands on her knees to keep his balance. Her eyes met his, and he couldn’t help but thank his brothers’ God for her, for them all. “You alright?”

“No,” her voice was small, but he could see her strength in her eyes. She was letting them in, and only them. With a sad smile Daryl raised his hand and caressed her cheek softly, his heart beating even faster as she turned her face and dropped a small kiss over his pulse point. This was what mattered to him, this was what he was willing to put everything in the line for.

“Ryan Samuels,” Carol straightened a little from her slumped down position and the three men let her have some space, “he was bit, he, he-“ she took a deep breath as tears started to run silently down her cheeks again, “he asked me if I could take care of his girls for him, he asked me to take them on as if they were my own.”

She wasn’t sobbing, but she was definitely close to it. Daryl dropped into his knees in between her open legs and hugged her. He felt as she brought him as close as she was able to, her face now being the one hidden in his neck. He could feel her tears in his neck and he knew that the moment he pulled back, they would all be able to tell he had been crying too.

“We’ll take care of them, love.” Daryl could hear and feel Murphy move so he was wrapped around both him and Carol as much as he could, and Daryl couldn’t be more grateful. “They’re part of us now, love. We’ll take care of them, don’t you worry about that.”

Slowly they all started to calm down, Daryl was barely able to feel his knees by the time Carol finally pulled away, her breathing once again under control. He sat himself down right there, at her feet, instead of braving trying to get up and face planting in front of the three of them; he knew better than that, he would never live it down.

The mood was morose even among them, there was something in the air that had all of them fidgeting more than usual. Change was coming, and sometimes change was good- as he more than anyone could tell, but Daryl couldn’t shake the feeling that this change wasn’t going to be a good one.

“It’s almost time,” Carol said softly from where she was sitting her back to Connor’s chest as he hugged her to him. “Are you ready?” The question was meant for him, but somehow it felt like she was asking all of them.

Silently he got to his feet, holding his hand out for her to grab and pulling her up as soon as she did so. Carol was waiting as usual for him to drop her hand, Daryl had gotten a lot better with showing them, her, his affection but it was usually when it was only them.

Her free hand caressed Connor’s cheek, and then the top of Murphy’s head as Daryl pulled her towards the exit. Never dropping her hand from his larger one.

They moved silently through the corridors as they made their way to the room where Hershel and the others were waiting for them. They didn’t need words, they didn’t need anything other than each other presence to calm the battle inside their hearts and minds.

When they arrived to the library there was almost no one there. Glenn was the only one already sitting there, and the knew better than to comment on the fact that Daryl had yet dropped her hand.

“Hey,” Daryl greeted Glenn as he moved so he was sitting straddling the chair next to the one Carol chose for herself, moving the chair until he was able comfortably still gripping her hand in his, now both lying over her knee under the table.

Glenn had barely looked up, many things in his mind as he got lost once again in whatever needed to go through. Slowly every one of the council members made its way inside the room, the vibe was tense and Daryl tried not to start fidgeting gripping Carol’s hand a little harder to keep himself from doing so.

Sasha was the last council member to arrive, and they all soon were sitting around the table. They were all silent, everyone knowing what had happened but no one sure of where to begin.

“Patrick was fine yesterday morning,” Carol was the first to take the plunge, and Daryl saw as she focused on the table, unable to meet anyone’s eyes. “And today he’s dead.”

“You say yesterday morning,” Hershel said as he leaned forward a little, looking at Carol. “I wasn’t aware he had been sick at all.”

“He claimed to be feeling nauseous, and feeling like he was going to vomit around four; I should have told him to go see you.”

“That gives us, give or take twelve hours,” Glenn said as he looked from one council member to another. “From when he started having symptoms to when he turned, he needed at least a couple of hours to have turned so many of them.”

“We need to separate anyone who have been exposed.”

“That’s everyone in that cellblock, that’s all of us, maybe more.” Daryl’s thoughts went immediately to Judith, the baby had no vaccines for anything, they all needed to stay away from her immediately.

“We know that this sickness is lethal-“.  Hershel chose to ignore the muttered ‘no shit’ coming from Daryl. “We don’t know how easy it spreads, is there anyone with symptoms that we know of?”

“We have to do something.” Daryl noticed how Carol’s voice was starting to rise in volume as Hershel was about to continue on. “We have to work under the impression it’s airborne, we can’t give ourselves the luxury of not doing so.”

“It’s not only the illness, people die and they become a threat.” Daryl agreed with Carol completely, but he could see others weren’t as sure of what was going on.

“We need to get them out of cell block D, put them somewhere else.” Hershel’s voice was the same calm one they all knew, and Daryl was thankful for the man for once.

“What about cell block A?” Daryl asked.

“Death row?” Glenn looked like Daryl had just asked him to send them outside of the fences.

Daryl shrugged, “it’s clean, it’s closed from the other blocks, we can ask Doctor S if he thinks it will be alright.”

“I’ll help Caleb get it set up.” Hershel was just finished saying when the sound of someone coughing was heard from the outside.

Daryl was the first one on his feet, putting an arm back as if trying to keep Carol from getting too close as he walked towards the door. As if the threat was something more tangible than an airborne virus.

“You okay?” Carol looked at Daryl frowning as they heard Tyreese ask the person coughing up a lung; Daryl shook his head as Carol moved from under his arm to get out the door first.

“Stubborn woman,” Daryl muttered only for her ears as he followed her promptly.

“You sure? You don’t sound so good,” Carol said to Karen and Tyreese as the two of them turned to look at the sound of their steps.

“I’m just taking her back to my cell so she can rest.” Daryl walked closer to Carol’s back, so his front was almost flushed to her back as he saw the annoyed look Tyreese threw her way.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Hershel said as everyone looked at the two people at the end of the hallway.

“Why? What is going on?” Daryl couldn’t help wanting to step in front of Carol, although he knew she wouldn’t exactly appreciate it, but there was a threat there and he needed to protect her, he needed to protect all of them.

Glenn was the one that finally answered the question, he took a deep breath before looking at Tyreese with a sad look on his eyes. “We think it’s some kind of flu, that’s what we think killed Patrick.”

“We need to start quarantining people, those that are presenting symptoms need to stay away from those exposed, and those that haven’t been we can only try to put them where no one has been lately, away from all this.” Carol moved her hand back until she found Daryl’s, needing his strength right there; all of them were at risk, especially if it was as they suspected and it was airborne.

“It killed Patrick?” They all tried to mask their faces, but they all knew what this probably meant. Or at least Carol thought they all did.

“No, no, but she’s alright.” Tyreese said, and Carol couldn’t help but feel bad for him, she turned slightly and made eye contact with Daryl, things were going to get ugly eventually. “Now that we know what is it, we can treat it, right?”

“Don’t panic.” Hershel words seemed to have some calming effect on Tyreese as Karen took his big hand in hers. “But in the meantime we need to get you away from everyone else and I’ll ask Caleb to come and look at you.” Hershel took a step closer to them, but then seemed to remember himself and stopped, “and I’ll see what medications we have that could help you.”

“David,” Karen said as she coughed once before continuing, “from the Decatour group, he was coughing this morning too.”

“I’ll go get David,” Glenn muttered as he started moving in the opposite direction from where Karen and Tyreese where, “there are some empty clean cells by Connor’s prayer room, I’ll meet you there.”

“Come on,” Sasha said as she made her way through the group and all the way to Tyreese and Karen’s side. “I’ll help you get settled.”

Carol and Daryl moved aside and towards each other as the three of them walked pass.

“We’ll need to call another meeting later today.” Carol noticed then how sad Hershel really was, he had been trying to keep everyone calm with his words before, but now? With just Daryl and her? There was no need to keep pretending.

“Alright, I’ll get started on the dead ones.”

“Wear gloves and a mask, be careful.” Daryl nodded to him, watching together with Carol as he followed where Sasha had ushered Karen and Ty before.

Silence once again fell upon them, and Daryl couldn’t help but be glad that it was only them now. “Hey,” he said softly as he used their linked hands to bring her close to him once again. Crossbow over one arm, and her hand in the other he was only able to give her a half hug as she wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her face against his shoulder. “We’re okay, we’ll be careful and we’ll take care of each other.”

“I’m just worried about the girls, they were with Patrick a long time yesterday.” She pulled back, to be able to look up at him.

“They’re strong.”

Carol nodded, standing on her tiptoes to be able to place a soft kiss on his lips. “Please be careful.”

“For you? Always.”

.-.-.-

“Are you really feeling good?”

“For fucks sake Connor, stop it.” Connor stopped as he felt Murphy’s hand on his chest. “There are more important things to worry about than that.”

“Are you fucking stupid?” Murphy didn’t back down when Connor pushed against his arm, getting close enough that he could feel the spray of his spit as he growled at him, “are you really telling me I shouldn’t care about what happened yesterday?” Connor didn’t notice but he had started to push Murphy back, “are you fucking telling me that I shouldn’t check on you after you fucking passed out yesterday?”

“Nothing happened!”

“The fuck it did!” A final push had Murphy slamming against the wall and seeing red. He pushed himself from the wall and took a swipe at Connor, he grunted when his older brother moved out of the way using his own movement to tackle him and slam him against the wall once again. “You are such a stupid idjit, are you fucking serious?” Connor voice was loud and not caring if anyone heard them at the moment.

Murphy grunted when he pushed Connor off of him once again, he was reading to jump over his body once again when a voice stopped both of them in their tracks. “Would you two stop it!” If it had been anyone else, they would probably not had stopped until one of them had finally called it and they both had felt better; but it was Carol, and they both knew how she detested whenever they fought.

They were both still looking warily at each other as they heard her make her way quickly down the hallway towards them, her steps were hurried as if she felt like she needed to be there in case one of them called of their cease fire and it all started all over again.

“I have no idea what happened,” Carol said as she finally stood in between the two of them, looking at Connor first before making eye contact with Murphy. “But this is not the time, you can’t be fighting right now, I need you not to be fighting right now.”

Murphy felt his anger leave him as he saw Carol standing in between him and Connor, her chest heaving and her voice breaking every other word as she looked from him to Connor. She was right, she was right as she usually was.

“What was this about?”

Connor felt like a scolded little boy, he knew Murphy was tense, and a tense Murphy was a Murphy that was quick to act… not so quick to think before actually acting. The three of them apparently shared that trait.

“Misunderstanding, love.” Murphy locked eyes with Connor over Carol’s head, as the two of them moved towards her in synch. The squabble was over, he was still mad at Connor for trying to baby him, but they would work on that later. There were more important things to worry about right then. “Nothing to worry about, we’re good.”

“Better than good,” Murphy muttered as he smiled pulling Connor close in a hug, leaving Carol sandwiched in between them.

“You better be.” Was her muttered replied as she molded herself to Murphy’s front, enjoying the feeling of peace and safety being in their arms gave her.

“Where’s Daryl?”

Carol breathed them in deeply, as if trying to ingrain their smell into her memory. “He’s taking care of the bodies, wear a mask and gloves when you go out to help him.” Connor smiled against the back of her head, as she patted his hand where it was wrapped around her. She knew he would be out there helping his brother as soon as possible.

“Anything for me to do?” Murphy asked as Connor pulled back, doing the same and letting her walk in front of them.

“I think I have the perfect task for you.”

-.-.-.-

“There’s something not quite right with that girl,” Connor said in a matter of greeting as he stood next to the open grave Daryl was digging. Daryl grunted as he squinted up to look at his brother from behind the improvised mask he was using. “We need to keep our eyes open on that one.” Connor was not looking at him, instead he was looking at where he could make out Carol was standing with the two Samuels girls.

“She’s just a little girl,” Daryl said as he went back to digging the hole, moving to the side as he saw his brother’s legs dangle down from his periphery.

“And everyone told Noah it was _just_ rain, and we all know how that turned up.” Daryl sighed as he looked up again to meet Connor’s eyes, there was true concern behind them and he knew his brother wouldn’t be acting like this if it wasn’t real. “There’s just something about that lass, as wee as she is, there’s something that I can’t explain.”

“Alright,” Daryl dried the sweat in his forehead with the back of his forearm, his eyes straining from his brother to where Carol was standing talking with the girls, only to see Lizzie run away from the fence and from Carol. “We’ll keep an eye on her, we can’t let anything happen to them.”

Connor nodded, smiling behind his own makeshift mask. Daryl scoffed as he realized what he was doing, shaking his head before pointing at the space between then, “Dig.”

“Sir, yes, sir.”

They worked in silence for a while before Connor saw a figure approaching.

“Heads up, your best friend is here.”

“Shut up,” Daryl growled as he continued digging the hole, trying not to let his brother get a rise out of him. Truth was that he respected Rick, he might not completely understand what he was doing; nor agreed with his decision to dislike his brothers, mostly Murphy so much, but he respected him. Rick had been able to get them out of some difficult situations, the man had lost it for a while but he seemed to have found himself once more.

“You guys need any help?” Rick looked from one brother to the other, trying to catch either of their attention.

“Nah, we’re good.” Daryl stopped, moving out of the way as Connor continued digging. He grunted as he used his arms to get off the hole, moving to the side and starting a new one.

“If you’re here to help, there’s another shovel over there,” Connor muttered as he frowned looking at Rick. It was kind of clear the mind had not expected him to be there, that he wanted to talk to his brother without anyone else around.

Daryl glared at his brother over his shoulder as continued digging. “I’m glad you were in there today,” Daryl said as he looked at Rick, leaning over his shovel as he tried to regain his bearings.

“Much help I was without my gun.” Daryl felt like kicking his brother as he saw his intentions to open his mouth and say something to Rick once again. He was usually the most sensible out of the three of them, but he just did not like Rick Grimes at all.

“Nah, you were,” Daryl pulled down his mask, not willing to have a full conversation with his face hidden, “you deserve the time you’ve taken for yourself, for your kids.”

Carl had apparently been the main motivator for Rick stepping down, but it hadn’t really changed much with the kid. Their relationship hadn’t been the same after what had happened with Lori, and Rick seemed to resent Murphy for how close the two of them had become.

“We wouldn’t be here without you.” Daryl could feel Connor’s glare but he ignored it, Connor didn’t know what they had all gone through that winter before the prison, they didn’t understand his respect for Rick because they had only known the Rick standing before them. This Rick was a broken man, but it was one of the first persons to ever value him, Daryl, and he would always be grateful for that.

“Nah, it was all of us.”

“But it was you first, back in the farm? During that winter? We made it this far because of you. Are you going to help us figure this one out?”

“I screwed up too many times-“

“No shit,” Daryl glared at Connor as he heard his muttered words.

“Those calls I had to take, it got me started going down that road, it almost cost me my daughter,” Rick stopped to take a breath having either forgotten or not caring about the fact that he had one brother too many as a witness to this conversation, “it certainly cost me Carl.”

“He’s still there, he’s still your boy.” Daryl looked at Connor as his brother spoke, just waiting to see if something would come out of him butting in.

“He’s not the same boy he was, those decisions cost me that,” Rick said as he shook his head, not looking at Connor as he did so.

“No one is; you know?” Daryl said softly as he looked at his brother, “the person that we were? This shit changes you, but Carl? He’s still good.”

“I can’t, I can help with anything else, but not with that.”

Daryl nodded, before he moved to pull his mask up to start continuing digging. “What is worth, it’s good to see you in the middle of it when things go to shit.”

“Daryl! Rick!” Maggie’s voice yelling for them made the three of them look up and towards where she was standing, only to see her waving her arms at them as the fence behind her was pushed in by walkers, barely still standing.

“Ballocks!” Connor said as he started pushing Daryl to run behind Rick towards where Maggie was waiting for them. Their day had just gotten even better.

.-.-.

Murphy sighed as he watched Carl make crosses from pieces of wood on the floor of their common area, the boy was alone and Murphy mentally thanked Carol for giving him this task. His friend needed some comforting and he was definitely up to the task.

Carl looked up as he heard his steps as he went down the stairs and showed him what he was working on. “Do you know if Patrick was catholic?”

Murphy chuckled as he moved to sit down beside him on the ground, legs crossed as he picked up two other pieces of wood and started on his own cross. “Nah, he told Connor he was a practicing atheist.”

Carl sighed, and started tugging at the pieces of wood he had just nailed together. Murphy put his hands over his, stopping him from doing so. “But it would still be a nice touch for him to have marker for his grave, even if he didn’t believe.”

Carl sagged in his effort, dropping his head and letting himself drop against Murphy’s side. “I’m sorry you lost your friend, lad.” Carl nodded, still looking down at the cross in his hands, not moving from where he was resting against Murphy.

“He used to call me young Sir, he used to say I was too much of a grown up to hang out with boys like him.”

“You are still a wee lad, no matter what has happened.” Murphy ruffled Carl’s hair, making him groan in annoyance and pull away from him.

“Stop it.”

“No, really. You might have lived things the other kids haven’t, but you’re still a kid, remember that, don’t let anyone take that away from you.” Murphy had moved to he was able to catch Carl’s eyes, being completely serious.

“Kids don’t survive in this world, Murph. I have to survive, for Judy.”

“You survive, that’s your job, I agree.” Murphy put his hands on Carl’s shoulders squeezing them, “but that doesn’t mean you can’t be a kid when you’re able to, and I will fight any of them if they try to make you work like a grown up when it’s not yet time for you to be one.”

“My dad doesn’t trust me with my gun because I am a kid.”

“Your dad doesn’t trust you with your gun because of his own shit, you did what you did that day because you had to. You shot that kid in the arm when he took too long to lower his gun, you do what you have to do to survive.”

Carl nodded as he heard his words, moving to grab two other pieces of wood to start another cross. “Did you know what Carol is teaching the other kids?”

Murphy grabbed a hammer and started on his own cross. “Yeah, she’s teaching them to survive.”

“Does my dad know? Their parents?”

“Nope,” Murphy said as he nailed the two pieces together.

“Why?”

“Because they won’t understand, or maybe some will… definitely not your pa though.”

Carl nodded, continuing working.

“Are you going to tell him?”

“I don’t want to lie to my dad.” Carl’s confession made Murphy smile sadly, in the end the boy still wanted his father’s approval any way he could get it.

“Not asking to do so, just don’t say anything.” Murphy grabbed two new pieces as he finished with the cross he had in his hands, he sighed. “Do you understand why she’s doing it?”

Carl nodded, biting his lip. “Sophia.”

“Sophia.” Murphy repeated the name, both of them understanding that everything Carol did for those children was because of her own child, because of the pain and guilt she carried and will carry for the rest of her life.

.-.-.-.

Daryl watched from the inner gate of the prison as the two little girls that had been with Carol walked back towards the prison hand in hand. He started walking down the road, giving them a small smile as he passed by them, trying not to think about Connor’s words as Lizzie’s expression didn’t change at all.

He continued his way towards where he could see Carol was still standing, her back to him looking outside the fences. She was so deep in thought that she didn’t even reacted when he finally stopped beside her, his hand slowly moving to press against the small of her back.

“You okay?”

She sighed as she turned to look at him, her eyes bright with unshed tears. “Gotta be.”

“Nah,” Daryl said as he took a step closer to her, his hand moving until he was grasping her other side. “I reckon you don’t have to be anything you don’t want to.”

“Is that so?” her voice was soft as her hand moved to grasp his on her hip, and as she moved so her head was resting over his chest.

“Yeah, it’s a rule.”

“Says who?”

“It’s common law, love.” Both Daryl and Carol jumped as they heard Connor’s voice from behind them, with Carol elbowing the oldest MacManus as he moved to stand on her free side.

Silence enveloped the three of them, or as much silence as there ever is with the sound of walkers groaning and moaning surrounding them.

“I’m afraid.” Carol broke their silence a few moments later, feeling as Connor moved closer as if him and Daryl would be able to keep things away from her by force of will. “I’m afraid for the girls, of what is going to happen to them.”

She knew neither of the men surrounding her would lie to her, that they weren’t the type of person to say things and not mean them. She was not surprised by the fact that neither of them jumped to the chance to reassure her, to tell her that everything would be alright; that nothing would happen to them.

“We’ll be here with you, whatever it happens.” Connor said softly as he put an arm around her back, all the way around until he was fisting his hand on the back of Daryl’s shirt.

“No matter what,” Daryl murmured into her head as he completed the circle sandwiching her between the two of them. “Always.”

“We should go back,” Daryl said as he moved back after a few moments, looking over his shoulder to check if they were still alone out there. It wouldn’t be long now, Rick still had to set the pigpen on fire. “We have a long night ahead of us.”

“And Murphy will not stop his bitching if he knows we were cuddling without him.” Connor added as he started on his way back, his arm still around two of his favorite people.

“And Murphy will definitely never stop bitching if he knows that.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.

Murphy groaned as he felt the bed moving. “Shhh, shhh,” he could feel Carol’s small hand patting his chest softly as if trying to lull him back to sleep, “Go back to sleep.”

“Nah,” he whispered as he felt Carol move over him to try and get out of bed. His arms automatically moved to try and keep her in bed with him. The night had been long as they had predicted, with both Connor and Daryl spending most of it out of their bed.

“Go back to sleep,” Murphy smiled as he felt her breath over his face, just as she moved and kissed his lips softly. “I love you, get some more sleep.”

The next time Murphy woke up he was alone, the next thing that woke him up wasn’t a kiss but a man’s scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya know the drill... please comment guys, let me know what ya'll think of this.
> 
> Find me in [ Tumblr ](http://geektaire.tumblr.com)


	3. Isolation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who was able to finish the chapter with 36 minutes to spare on her Tuesday?
> 
> Yep.... sorry, better late than never... right?
> 
> Also, want to apologize in advance. I was so bad at writing this week, that my lovely beta 'onequarterbritish' was only able to beta about the first 3k of this. So basically, what you're reading, that's my sucky grammar. I will put up the edited version later on the week.... k?
> 
> Well... enjoy

**Chapter III**

**Isolation**

 

The scars on his wrists never went away. Over ten years had passed since that day and the scars still lingered; he could still see the lines where the steel of the handcuffs had cut deeply enough to have needed stitches.

He still had nightmares about that day. Nightmares were all he could do was stand there as he heard the gun go off, as he was left alone in this world.

More often than not, his nightmares were different now. Images of Murphy, Daryl, and Carol becoming one of those things haunted him some nights, and tonight it had been one of those nights.

Murphy was still out of duty, as much as he hated that. Daryl had taken it on himself to stay on watch, no one wanting a repeat of their wake up call that morning. And Carol had decided to stay with Murphy after tucking the girls in into one of the free cells on their block.

He hadn’t been able to sleep. He had had watch on the tower, had finished at four as their usual rotation was, but instead of going to their bed where he knew he would find Carol and Murphy; he had decided to go and spend some time praying to whoever was willing to listen.

He missed it, he missed the early mornings at church with his brother. He missed the feeling of respite that confession would give him; the feeling of being looked over by something bigger than them, bigger than them all.

He understood people’s faith faltering at times like these. But he had been taught that at times like these was when God would somehow shine through; as hard as it seemed. And he liked to think so, he saw God shining through in every night spent with his family in bed, in every stupid fight he had with Murphy, in every smile they were able to pull from Daryl, in every kiss he could get from Carol.

Connor sighed as his thoughts were interrupted by hacking coughs once again. Since he had arrived at the unofficial chapel, Karen’s and David’s coughs had gotten worse. He hadn’t seen anyone down there with the two of them when he had walked by their rooms a good half an hour ago, and he really had no idea what the plan would be when it came to them. They were supposed to be staying as far away from them as possible, but to leave them completely unattended? That was just plain cruel.

Connor blinked when there was a respite on the coughing, only to hear what sounded like someone trying to muffle their cries. There was only one person coughing now, and he knew what that probably meant. He did the sign of the cross, standing from where he was kneeling, walking towards the door as he put the rosary Daryl had gotten him inside his shirt as he walked towards the previous deserted hallway.

“Carol?” Connor asked softly as he hurried down towards where the huddled figure of Carol was trying to muffle her cries as she sat in front of the closed door of the room where David and Karen were. “What’s wrong?”

Carol big blue eyes looked up, her chest heaving as she tried to be able to breathe through her tears. It was then when Connor realized that she was clutching something in her hands- the knife Daryl had gotten for her own protection.

“Is it time?” Connor asked as he rested his forehead against hers, his hands on her cheeks as he used his thumbs to wipe away the tears.

“They’re suffering so much.” He could barely make the pained breaths from the people inside the cell now, “I wanted to help.” Her voice was pained, her voice was small and defeated. Connor felt a little anger soar through, why had they been left alone? Why weren’t Doctor S or Hershel there with them?

“Why are you here? Where are Doctor S? Hershel?”

“I don’t know, I think, I think they’re still tending to the wounded,” Carol said as she started to calm down, Connor’s presence usually had that effect on her. “I went down to the toilets, and I could hear them coughing all the way to the bathrooms.”

“They’re not coughing anymore.”

“Fuck.”

-.-.-.-

Murphy first thought was that it was happening again. The moment he heard the inhuman yell he was out of bed at once, running out grabbing a weapon as he ran past whoever was in his way. He stopped dead in his tracks as he saw the big form of Tyreese almost dragging Rick behind him, still yelling incoherently.

“Someone killed them! They’re dead!” Murphy frowned, following behind the two men as they made their way into the tombs away from the general population.

“Wait!” Murphy said as he trotted to yank Rick back from Tyreese, realizing for once he had not seen his family since he woke up. “Who’s dead? What’s going on?”

“Someone murdered Karen and David,” Rick said as he pulled away from Murphy continuing on his way behind Tyreese.

“Daryl,” Rick called him over as he passed him as he was leaving the shower room. “We need you.” Daryl raised his eyebrows to his brother as he joined him walking behind the two men, Murphy just shook his head letting him know he had no idea what was going on.

The smell of burnt flesh made both Connor and Daryl grimace as Tyreese pushed the door to one of the inner courtyards open. There in front of them were two charred bodies, of who they could only assume were David and Karen. Someone had taken the time to make sure the two of them were burned, while there was no blood traces anywhere.

“Are you saying you found them like this?” Daryl and Murphy stood next to the other, as the former cop examined the bodies.

“I came to bring flowers to Karen…” Murphy couldn’t help but feel bad for Tyreese whose voice slightly broke as his eyes never left his girlfriend’s remains. “And I didn’t find her in her cell; I followed the smell down here.”

The four of them turned to look at the door as Carol pushed it open, with only Murphy keeping his eyes on her as she moved to stand between him and Daryl. She didn’t look surprised at what was in front of them, and he was sure going to ask about it later on.

“Someone dragged them out here and set them on fire!” Carol jumped slightly as Tyreese raised his voice, her hands grabbing at the twin’s wrists as an unconscious reaction. Daryl looked at her before taking a step forwards and standing between her and Tyreese. “They killed them and set them on fire!”

Murphy frowned as he saw Carol take a small step forward, as if she was going to say something, at the exact same moment Tyreese turned and approached Rick threateningly. Daryl didn’t even think about it, he was at the much bigger man’s back as soon as he moved, waiting for him to do something rash.

“You were a cop, you find out who did this and you bring them to me!” Tyreese tone was one that left nothing to the imagination; a man that big could do a lot of damage to whomever was put in front of him. “You bring them to me!”

“We’ll find out who did this-“ Daryl sneered when Tyreese pushed him away as he tried to calm him down, his attention never wavering from Rick’s face.

“I need to say it again?!” Tyreese asked Rick, taking a small step back.

“No, I understand.” Rick started muttering as he looked down and away from the bigger man. “I’ve been where you are, you saw me, it’s dangerous.”

“Karen didn’t deserve this! David didn’t deserve this! Nobody does.”

“Hey man, let’s-” Daryl said as he went to pull Tyreese back only to gasp as Tyreese turned on him grabbing him by the lapels of his shirt and slamming him into the closed gate behind him.

“We’re not going nowhere until we find out who did this!”

Daryl put out his hands to stop Rick, Carol and Murphy as he saw the three of them move quickly towards him. His eyes were on Murphy, telling his brother to calm down and not do anything rash. He shook his head signaling to him to stop whatever he was planning on doing, knowing that it would probably make the situation worse.

“That’s not how we do things here, Ty.” Murphy said as he took a step forward, standing in front of Carol. The man was volatile and he couldn’t let anything happen to her. “We’re on the same side, we all want to know what happened here.”

“They were murdered!” Tyreese screamed as he finally let Daryl go and turned on Murphy now. Daryl immediately moved to stand close to his brother, throwing Carol a look for her to move closer to the door, just in case.

“Hey…” Tyreese attention was taken from Murphy as Rick tried to approach Tyreese once again, “I know what you’re going through, we have all lost someone.”

“Shut up,” Tyreese said in a low voice that made both Murphy and Daryl move closer to Carol.

“She wouldn’t want you to be like this.”

“Shut up.”

“Think about it-“Rick didn’t finish his sentence because Tyreese slammed his fist against his face. Daryl immediately moved to help Rick while Murphy moved back to keep Carol protected as the two men started exchanging blows.

“Stop!” Carol said from behind Murphy as he just kept pushing her back, and further away from the frail. “Daryl! Stop this!”

Daryl reacted at her call, and threw himself at Tyreese back, grabbing him and pulling him off Rick. “Man, stop!”

The four of them saw as Rick got off the floor, the side of his face where Ty had hit him was bleeding. There was a look on his face though, it was a look Daryl hadn’t seen in a long time. He barely had a chance to react, letting go of Tyreese at the last minute to keep himself from being thrown down along with him.

Daryl found Carol’s and Murphy’s eyes over the frail, the three of them exchanging identical looks of bewilderment. Rick Grimes was beating the living shit out of the mourning man.

“Rick!” Daryl yelled as he approached his friend, grabbing from behind just as he had done with Tyreese. The only answer he got for his troubles was to be pushed away just before Rick’s fist slammed into the side of his face throwing him down to the floor.

“Oh no, motherfucker.” Murphy had been looking for an opportunity to clock Rick Grimes for months, and the man had just given him one in a silver platter.

Rick was still looking down at Tyreese, looking like he was about to start on the man that was groaning and crying on the floor again. He never saw Murphy’s fist coming.

.-.-.-

They had to take the two men to Hershel. Daryl had glared at Tyreese as Murphy helped him up, while Daryl had thrown Rick over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. Carol had watched as her boys helped the injured men all the way back to Hershel’s infirmary feeling like there wasn’t enough air in the world for her to be able to breathe.

She had been about to come out clean, she was going to tell them what had happened. But then Tyreese had reacted so violently, he was so big and strong and she knew that if he tried to do anything to her both Murphy and Daryl would get in the way. And both of them were completely innocent in all that, and she would never forgive herself if something happened to them because of a choice she took, because of something she did.

“Hey,” Carol jumped when she felt someone softly touch the back of her arm, turning quickly only to see that Connor was standing there. He had gone to get himself cleaned up, and she hadn’t had any idea of what had happened. She had no words for him, she just turned and launched herself into his arms, burrowing her face in his neck trying to keep herself from trembling any harder.

“What happened?” Connor asked her softly as he ran his hands up and down her back, feeling her tremble in his arms as he had felt her few times before.

“Someone killed David and Karen last night,” Daryl said as he joined them after leaving Rick in Hershel’s care. “Ty found out and went fucking nuts.”

“And then this idjit’s best friend-“ Murphy elbowed Daryl on the side, “-fucking lost it, and ended up clocking Decks here.”

“He fucking did what?” Daryl shook his head as Connor tensed up.  Seemed that it didn’t matter that he was more than able to protect himself, Connor had taken the big brother thing very seriously since they had met six months before.

“Don’t worry, I knocked his ass out.”

Daryl chuckled before turning his attention back to Carol in Connor’s arms. She was more shaken that he had thought she would be, after all she was no newbie to how violent men could get. He hated the fact that she had more than firsthand experience at that.

“You alright?” Daryl asked softly as he approached her, his hand moving to caress the back of her head. She nodded as she turned her face to be able to look at him from where she was still somehow hiding in Connor’s arms. He could see there was something else there that hadn’t been before, but he was patient, everything could wait.

“You guys should get some rest,” Murphy said as he moved closer to the three of them, pushing at Daryl’s and Carol’s back lightly. “You three barely got any sleep, go, get some shut eye and I’ll go wake you up in a couple of hours.”

“Murph,” Carol said as she pulled away from Connor’s arms, trying to look stern at the look Murphy was giving her.

Murphy smiled at her, taking her hand and pulling her to him. His lips found hers, smiling as he deepened the kiss and got her to moan lightly. “Go,” he whispered to her as he pulled away from the kiss. “Go and dream of me.”

Daryl and Connor flipped him off at the same time as they pulled Carol back between them. Murphy only laughed.

Murphy was still chuckling when he turned on his heel and made his way down towards the other side of the prison. He was being honest when he said the three of them needed to rest, and he was no stranger to taking over his family’s duties since he was the one not being able to sleep for once.

His head had been pounding since the moment they had all stepped into the light earlier on. He had thought it was just the smell together with the harsh sunlight that had befallen them as they stood outside. He hoped it was like that.

“Hey.” Murphy looked up as he reached the room where they kept the cleaning supplies, finding Sasha standing in the middle of the hallway.

“Hey,” he returned the greeting as he opened the door and looked at whatever Carol had stashed in there. There wasn’t much, but they would have to make due. There was some bleach left, and he took those bottles out with him. “You alright?” He asked the former firewoman as he turned to find her standing in the same stop he had left her before.

“Yeah, just a little headache.” Sasha answered as he took some of the bottles out of his arms. “I was helping Doctor S tend to the wounded all night.”

“Shit,” Murphy said, jumping back when he let one of the bottles fall from his arms. Sasha frowned as she looked at him, he looked a little pale. “You don’t know.”

Sasha stopped where she was crouching, looking up at him from there. “What?”

“Tyreese is in the infirmary, something happened last night and Karen and David are dead.” Tact had never been something the MacManus were good at, that was for sure. “Tyreese and Rick got into a fight, you might want to go see him.”

Murphy couldn’t help but noticed how Sasha was looking a little pale, but he tried not to say anything. He tried to smile at her as she passed him the bottles, their hands tangling as he tried to get a good grip in all of the bottles at the same time. He sighed, sending out a prayer to God for him to take care of them all.

For now, he had shit to do.

-.-.-.

The three of them had fallen silently into their bed. They hadn’t cared where or how they slept, only moving far enough inside the bed that they wouldn’t fall off.

Daryl was the first one to wake up as usual, maybe an hour after the three of them had gotten there. There was a lot of things to do, people to see, things to worry about. But it could all wait, it could all wait for the five minutes he would take for himself to enjoy the moment, that was all the would needed for himself.

When everything had changed six months ago, after he found his brothers, after Merle died, he had never thought he would get what he had right now. Merle had been all he knew, and somewhere inside he had expected Connor and Murphy somehow turn into the same mess than Merle and him were. But they hadn’t.

The two of them, Connor and Murphy, had filled a place in his heart, I his soul, that he hadn’t realized it was always missing. It was like he hadn’t realize that he had been looking for them all this time, like the place at his back, at his side, had always been reserved for them without he even having any idea of their existence.

And Carol… He couldn’t help but look down at her, lying in between him and Connor, and let a small smile appear on his face. Carol was the one thing that made everything make sense. She was his guide, his north start. She had been the first person in this world to show him he was worth something, to show him that he could be more than he was, she was the first person that had loved him for him; and not because of some sense of duty.

His Ma had loved him because he was her son, Merle had loved him in his own twisted way because he was blood, he was his little brother. But Carol was the first one that had loved him for him. And yes, he knew she loved him even if she hadn’t said it to him directly. His woman thought she would make him run if she did, so she cared to do so at the same time she told his siblings, and he was okay with that.

Truth was, that as strange this relationship the four of them had fallen into; he would not change a thing. He loved them, the three of them were absolutely everything to him. He had never thought he could have something like what he had in that room every night, he never thought he deserved to be loved as he was.

“You’re thinking way too loud, brother.” Daryl shook his head before burrowing his face in Carol’s hair as he heard Connor mutter sleepily from her other side. “Just go back to sleep.”

“Is that another one of your weird triplet thing?” Daryl couldn’t help but chuckle as he heard Carol speak, trying not to groan as the little minx moved back even more ending up completely flushed against him, not caring about the state of his morning wood.

“That’s just him and Murph, love.” Connor’s voice was still barely above a whisper, “it’s their weird monozygotic twin bullshit.”

“He’s just jealous cause he’s different.” Daryl made sure they could hear the sarcasm at the use of that word.

It was moments like this exact one that made everything he did worth it. The opportunity to have a family to tease even in the darkest moments, to have them accept him, to have them love him? That was everything to him.

“I am in fact the better looking triplet after all, isn’t that right love?”

“I plead the fifth.”

“And of what crime are you being accused of, love?” The three of them turned to see Murphy standing at the opening of their room, a smile on his face.

“Of loving your ugly mug, that’s the biggest crime of all.”

“Daryl, sweetheart, you’re not helping your case.” Daryl blushed and hid his face in Carol’s hair as he realized what had actually come out of his mouth.

Carol couldn’t help but laugh along Connor and Murphy when she felt his chuckled against the back of her neck.

“As much as I hate to interrupt this, the council is calling for a meeting.” The announcement sobered them all up immediately.

“More sick?” Carol asked as she pushed Connor into standing up, doing the same and moving to make room for Daryl to follow.

“Sasha, and a bunch of the people on D block.”

“Jesus Christ.” Connor said as he ran a hand through his hair. “Dead?”

“Some of the people Dr. S was treating during the night.”

“Well,” Carol said as she gave Connor a sad look, “let’s get to it.”

Daryl took her hand and squeezed it softly, dropping it before they left their room. Carol gave a last smile to the two remaining brothers as she hurried to catch up with Daryl. The mood was somber across the prison. The echoes of people coughing making both of them look at each other warily. Things were going to get a lot worse before they got better.

They were the last ones to arrive.

Carol frowned when she saw that both Andrea and Michonne were standing in the room, since neither of them were usual members of the council.

“It spread…” Hershel started talking as soon as the two of them sat down, Daryl again to her right sitting on the chair backwards. “Everyone that survived the attack on cell block D, Sasha, Doctor S? Everyone is starting to present symptoms.”

That explained the absence of Sasha from their table, Carol shot Daryl a quick look, seeing how Michonne was watching the two of them warily.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Daryl muttered, dropping his forehead to rest it against the backrest of the chair he was sitting on.

“So what do we do?” Carol was fast to add, her right hand gripping unconsciously Daryl’s knee under the table.

“First things first,” Hershel said stopping to sigh as he looked at both of them, “we keep everyone who presents any symptoms in isolation in cell block A, we need to have everyone wear masks, washing hands, plenty of fluids. We need to try and contain this as much as we can.”

“What else?” Daryl’s left hand moved to cover Carol’s over his knee. He needed the reassurance of her presence as much as she did.

“I can ask Rick to help me make a log of who was where and when? We can keep those that haven’t had any contact away from everyone else.” Daryl squeezed Carol’s hand trying to calm her down, she was getting riled up and he knew nothing good would come out from that. “But what are we going to do to stop this?”

“There is no stopping this.” Daryl couldn’t help but glare at the older man sitting at their table, he looked already defeated. “If you get it, you have to get through it.”

“So it just kills you?” Michonne asked as she moved to stand next to Andrea, putting a hand over her shoulder.

“I’m no doctor, but all we can is try and treat the symptoms and let their own immune systems work.” Hershel looked at her, before looking at everyone else on the table. “We need antivirals, antibiotics, hell we need everything.”

“We’ve been through every pharmacy nearby, and then some.” Daryl looked around, frowning when he noticed how pale Glenn was looking.

“That veterinary college? In West Peachtree Tech? People might have not thought to scavenge for medications there.” At their questioning looks, Hershel hurried to continue. “Some of the medications used to treat some of the most common animal diseases they are used on people too, we can use those to try and treat this.”

“That’s 80 miles out,” Daryl said as he nodded, he couldn’t bear to look at Carol but her hand squeezing his leg told him more than anything. “It was dangerous before, well not anymore, I’m taking a group we’re not wasting any more time.”

“I’m in,” Michonne said moving away from where she was standing at Andrea’s back.

“You haven’t been exposed to this, if you go with Daryl you will.”

“He’s already given me fleas.”

“It was ticks,” Carol corrected her sharing a fond look with the younger woman. Michonne would have his back, she was a little less concerned. Everyone stood up as soon as Daryl did.

“I can guide you, I know where everything is kept.”

“Man,” Daryl said as he put a hand out to stop Hershel from continuing while shooting a quick glance at Carol seeing his same fears reflected on her eyes, “you know how it is out there, we will probably have to make a run for it.”

“I can draw you a map.” Daryl nodded, turning to start making his way outside to get everything together for their run.

“Wait…” everyone stopped where they were, waiting for Hershel to continue. “There’s something else I think we should be doing.”

“I think we should try to protect our most vulnerable, our children.” Hershel nodded, looking down at his hands. “I propose we put them up in the administration building for the time being, away from everyone who’s sick.”

“What about the elderly?” Glenn asked.

The silence that followed was his answer.

Carol didn’t have to run a lot to be able to catch up to Daryl, she knew where he was headed.

“Who are you taking with you?”

“Zach, Bob, and maybe Connor or Murph?” Daryl answered as the two of them hurried outside, understanding how important time was at that moment.

“Why not both? I would feel a lot better if the three of you went together.”

“Don’t want to leave you alone,” Daryl said softly as he moved to push the heavy metal door open for her to pass.

“Don’t worry about that, just worry about coming back.”

“You know I will.”

“You better.”

“Carol?” Carol stopped as someone called her name as soon as she stepped outside. Daryl continued moving towards where their vehicles were parked.

“Go, I’ll be there to say goodbye.”

He only nodded before continuing on his path, he had a mission and he needed to get everything together, fast.

.-.-.

“This is bullshit!” Carl yelled as he threw his backpack across his room. Murphy watched as Rick turned and left the young boy in his cell was he was basically throwing a tantrum. His screams could be heard through the whole cell block.

“And what may I ask, is in fact bullshit?” Murphy asked as he leaned against the door of Carl’s cell, watching as the boy picked up his orange backpack from the ground.

“They are sending me with the babies, Murph, the babies!”

“Alright lad, stop.” Murphy put up a hand indicating for him to do so, “and rewind, who is sending you where? With whom?”

“My dad is sending me the administrative building, with the rest of the kids.”

“Why?”

“Because of the flu.”

“And then why are you doing this?” Murphy motioned with his hands to the mess that was Carl’s cell, and the boy had the audacity of looking properly chastised.

“It’s not fair.”

“It’s not fair that you are being sent to take care of those that can’t take care on their own?”

“I could help here! He’s just treating me like if I was a kid!”

“That’s the thing Carl,” Murphy said as he took the few feet that were separating them, putting his hands on the boy’s shoulders, “you are a kid, as much as you want to think you’re not, you are a kid.”

Carl sneered at his friend, moving back to get space between them.

“But being a kid doesn’t mean you can’t help, and that’s how you would be helping.”

“Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid Murph, just don’t.”

“Do you think that I would treat you like you are just another stupid wee lad? I know you Carl, I know what you are capable of, you know this.”

Carl looked away from Murphy, not being able to handle keeping eye contact with his friend.

“Just think about it Carl, what happens if hell breaks loose again? What happens if we can’t get there in time?” Murphy took a couple of more steps in, getting closer to Carl. “What happens if one of them gets sick? If they turn before we’re able to get there? Are you willing for us to lose every one of them? Beth? Judy?”

“That’s not fair Murph.” Murphy smiled sadly as Carl’s voice broke at the idea of something like that happening to his little sister.

“This is how you show that we can trust you with this, doing what you are asked to do lad.”

Carl nodded, his head still down. Murphy sighed, pulling the boy in for a hug that they both definitely needed. Murphy cleared his throat, coughing a little bit as he pulled away.

“Now, start getting ready, your dad will come for you in no time.”

.-.-.-

“Move it asshole, we’re going on a run.” Daryl said as soon as he got into their room, throwing his bag to Connor’s chest as his brother stood up quickly.

“Where?”

“Veterinary school, gotta get the meds for this shit.”

“Who else is going?” Connor had started throwing things into the bag without waiting for any instructions from him, and Daryl was glad.

“Already talked with Zach, Michonne, gotta find Murph, you and me.”

“Carol knows?”

“She said she would come by to say goodbye.” Neither of them stopped to even look at each other, knowing the other person’s movements by memory.

“Provisions?”

“Yep, I’ll go get the car ready, be ready to leave in half an hour.”

“You got it.”

Daryl left his brother in their room, seeing Murphy as he was leaving Carl’s cell.

“Go to Connor, he’ll explain.” The urgency in his voice made his brother not say a word, running up the stairs to talk to Connor.

Daryl moved as fast as he was able, picking up the keys to Zach’s car and then the boy himself as they made their way out for to check the car before they left.

“We could leave right now, I know my car better than anyone,” Zach muttered as he followed Daryl, grumbling at the thought of him not taking proper care of his vehicle.

“We gotta check, better to be prepared.”

“If I guess boy scout, would that count? I mean can you be a full time boy scout? Can that actually be a profession?”

“Zach,” Daryl said as he popped the hood of the car up, moving to check the oil quickly.

“Yes?” Zach answered as he looked on.

“Shut up.”

“Everything ready?” Daryl looked up as he heard Michonne walk towards them, throwing her things through the car’s open window.

“This son of a bitch is a quarter down,” Daryl muttered giving Zach a look, to what the younger man just shrugged and moved to get the oil from where they keep it.

Michonne chuckled, moving so she was leaning on the side of the car peering down at where Daryl was fumbling with the engine

“I’m glad you’re here.” Daryl said without looking up.

“Where else would I be?”

“Running off?” Daryl looked down at his oil smeared hands, trying to keep himself from fidgeting as he felt her eyes on him.

“You know that’s not what I’ve been doing.” Daryl shrugged, still not looking up. “Daryl,” Michonne said raising a hand but stopping short from touching him. “You know why I had to do that.”

He finally looked up, nodding but certainly not looking entirely convinced. They had gotten to know one another in the few trips he had joined her hunting for the Governor, and he knew the real reason why she was trying to stay away as much time as she was able to.

“Is it going to be like in the good old days?”

Daryl shook his head, peering up at her his messy hair hiding his eyes. “You’re getting the full treatment, three for the price of one.” He couldn’t help but smirk as he looked down at the engine as he heard her laugh, there had so little to laugh about these days. “And Bob and Zach.”

“Gonna be tight.”

“It would be my divine pleasure my warrior to spend so much time in such close quarters with you.” Daryl snorted as both him and Michonne looked to the side to see Connor walking in, two big bags over his shoulder, his smirk firm in place.

“Do you kiss Carol with that same mouth?” Michonne asked, and Daryl couldn’t help but smirk at the woman’s words. She was the most observant out of them all.

“I sure do.”

-.-.-.

Murphy had a bad feeling about this whole thing. He had been told by Connor what they were off to, and he had been put in charge of getting the few meager medical supplies they could scavenge for this, which wasn’t much. Some ace bandages, and some medical tape, that was basically it.

His heart had been racing since his brother had given him his task, and he was sweating a lot. He had had to move all over to see what he could find, without leaving Carol and everyone else staying there without nothing to work with.

Murphy touched his chest as he felt a pang there, as he made his way towards Connor’s chapel. They still had a few minutes to go before Daryl’s deadline and he wanted to pray a little. He wanted to find Carol and buried his face in her neck, but he knew she would probably be busy.

He stopped in his tracks as he heard a muffled voice coming from the close chapel. He frowned as he slowly opened the door, his face relaxing as he saw Carol kneeling in front of the small altar Connor had put up, bent down in prayer.

“Please, please,” Carol’s voice sounded small, tears falling down her cheeks, “please, I know I don’t deserve it, but please, don’t take another one, please.”

“Carol?” Murphy smiled at her as she turned, startled. Her blue eyes were red, as she tried to wipe the tears that had fallen down her cheeks. A fake smile appearing on her face as she tried to pretend nothing had happened.

“Hey Muffin, you ready to go?”

“Don’t do that, love,” Murphy said softly as he crossed the room in three steps, dropping into his knees by her. “Do not try to pretend with me, you know you don’t have to.”

Her smile fell, and Murphy pulled her close as he saw her mouth start to pout knowing she was about to start crying again.

“Lizzie is in isolation.”

Murphy pulled back, feeling his heart speed up as he looked down at her. “She’s strong, love; I’m sure she’ll put through.”

“I can’t lose another child Murph, I can’t.”

Silently Murphy pulled Carol back into his arms. What could he say that would actually help the grieving mother in his arms? What was there to say when there was a piece of her very own soul missing that no one could ever fill again.

“I come here often, to pray for forgiveness.” Murphy could feel her breath in his neck as she spoke, and he tried to calm down the shudder that was trying to take over his whole body. “Forgiveness for having being such a bad mother, for having failed Sophia in the most basic way; and it eats at me, the fact that I wasn’t able to protect her, just like I’m unable to protect Lizzie right now.”

His arms tightened around her, feeling as she slowly started to calm down. “I love you,” Murphy said whispering into her ear. “And Connor loves you, Daryl loves you; we love you and I know Sophia loves you from where she’s watching over us, over you.”

“I wish you would have met her.”

“So do I, love, so do I.”

.-.-.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come with you?” Connor frowned as he looked over Daryl’s shoulder as the former army medic shuffled closer to the car where him and Daryl were still waiting for Murphy to arrive.

“We’re full,” Daryl scoffed as he threw some of his stuff into the car. “And I’m sure Hershel could do with the help.”

“But what about knowing what you need, having someone who has an idea of what they’re looking for would be beneficial.”

Daryl finally stopped what he was doing, putting a hand into his pocket and pulling out the list Hershel had given him. He looked at it, squinting his eyes a little bit before turning to Connor. “What does it says there?” Daryl asked Connor.

“Zanamivir.” Connor read looking from his brother to Bob, frowning.

“There, that’s all we need.”

Bob made a face, still standing there as if he was going to continue arguing his way into the already full car when Tyreese walked up to them. Daryl took a few moments to look at the man, his eye still half closed, his whole body exuding anger as he stood glaring at them.

“I’m coming with you.”

Michonne and Zach turned to look at Daryl, Connor not taking his eyes from the huge pissed off man standing in front of him and his brother.

“Man, I get it, but we’re already ready to go,” Daryl’s voice was calm as if he was trying to pacify a wild animal.

“My sister, my only sister…” Tyreese took a step closer to Daryl and Connor, and Connor couldn’t help but shift on his feet and take a step closer to his brother’s back. No one was hitting Daryl on his watch “she’s in there, and someone killed Karen because of this, I’m not giving them an opportunity to do the same thing to her.”

“And believe me, I will put a bolt through the brain of the person who dared to do that,” Daryl felt the way Connor tensed behind him and tried to throw his brother a wondering look, “but right now we need to do this, as fast as we can.”

“I’m getting my gear,” Tyreese said without waiting for the other man’s response. Turning on his heel and stalking his way back towards the prison.

“Fuck!” Daryl yelled, turning and kicking the car’s tire. “He’s gonna get us into fucking problem.”

“Calm down, Decks.” Connor’s voice was low, only for his brother to hear. “You need to keep your head cool; we need to get through this.”

Daryl nodded, taking a deep breath. Connor clapped him on the back, smiling a little bit as his brother didn’t stiffen at the touch. It had taken them a long time to be able to get to this point.

“I’m going to go look for Murph, he’s taking too fucking long.” Daryl nodded, as he turned back to finish the last minute preparations for their run.

Connor hastened his pace as he heard something bang just around the corner, stopping suddenly as he watched as Carol kicked an overturn water container before she sat down at the steps of their outdoor kitchen.

She was crying. Quickly Connor made his way across the yard and sat himself down beside her, opening his arms knowing that what her next move would be.

“I’m so sick of crying all the time,” Carol muttered as she tried to control her tears as she let Connor pull her close to him. “I just cried all over Murphy not ten minutes ago.”

“That’s what we’re for, love.” Connor said as he rocked her from one side to the other.

“Did we do the right thing, Con? Is this God’s punishment to us for doing that?”

“Doing what love? For putting them out of their suffering? Because let me tell you love, if I had been choking on my own fluids, I swear to God I would asked you to do that myself.”

“Don’t say that,” her voice was broken and Connor couldn’t help but move her so she was sitting on his lap. “I could never do that, don’t ask me to do that.”

“I won’t, love,” Connor took one of her delicate hands that were bunching up his shirt in her fists and brought it to his lips. “I trust you to do what is right if the time comes, I trust you so much, love.”

He moved so he was able to kiss her forehead, sighing at the feeling of having her in his arms.

“Connor! Carol!” Maggie’s screams from inside the prison made the two of them jump up and run inside, barely noticing how Daryl had joined them shortly after.

“What’s wrong?” Carol asked as she approached Maggie, who was looking at something on the floor in the common room.

“Oh no,” Carol said as she felt onto her knees, a few feet in front of a pale trembling Murphy who was sweating and who was covering his mouth. She started to crawl her way towards him, looking over her shoulder to a frozen looking Connor and a heartbroken looking Daryl.

“Don’t come any closer!” Murphy barked at her, the hand not covering his mouth out making her stop where she was still a few feet away from him. “I don’t want you to get it too.”

“Muffin,” Carol said softly as she pushed his hand away and crawled the remaining distance. “I was just with you, remember.” The moment she put her arms around him, it was like all the fight had left him, just letting her cradle him into her chest.

“You’re burning up, sweetheart,” Carol said softly as she pushed his sweat matted hair out of his forehead, dropping a kiss on it. Her eyes immediately sought Connor’s, finding more terror in them that she had ever seen in her life.

“We need to leave, now!” Daryl barked, throwing a look at his brother before pulling Connor by the shoulder trying to drag him outside. “Connor, we need to leave, now!” Daryl said, his jaw clenched as he turned to his oldest brother, finding him still unmoving.

“Connor!” Daryl stopped, shaking his brother by his shoulders to try and get him to snap out of it.

“Daryl!” He hadn’t even realized that Carol had gotten Murphy up on her own, and she was now helping him stand almost falling under his weight.

“Decks,” Connor said softly, his eyes back on his brother pale form wincing as the middle triplet chest heaved with his coughs. “I can’t.”

Daryl sighed, dropping his forehead to rest on Connor’s shoulder, trying to get deep breaths to stop his own chest from heaving. It only took a couple of seconds for him to get himself under control. He took a deep breath before he took a couple of steps, standing right in front of Murphy and Carol.

“You better not kick the bucket before I return, you fucker.”

Murphy chuckled, wincing when that chuckle transformed into a hacking cough. Daryl watched him, feeling like his own lungs were the ones burning with the need of oxygen and not those of his brother.

“Take it easy, little brother,” Connor said as walked past Daryl to put himself under Murphy’s other side, grabbing him around the waist and starting to walk him towards where they all knew he needed to go. “Come back to us, Decks.”

“I will.” Daryl answered as he watched his brothers walk slowly away, feeling like a part of his very own soul was leaving him as he watched.

“The same applies to you,” Carol was beside him now, looking on as Connor practically carried Murphy away. “You better come back to us.”

“I will,” Daryl said softly as he turned to look at her, her eyes still on the door his brothers had just disappeared through. “I promise you.”

Daryl moved quickly, dropping a kiss on the top of her head before turning and walking away. Only to be stopped by her hand on his wrist. He said nothing, looking at where she was grabbing him before she looked back to her face. There was a determined look on her face, and he wanted nothing else but to kiss her, but he knew it wouldn’t be the smartest thing right then.

“Daryl,” Carol said stopping only to try and keep her tears from her voice, “I can’t do this without you, without any of you three. Please come back to us, to me.”

“I will,” he could feel his throat closing up, when they had woken up after their nap, he had never thought it would come to this.

“Please take care,” Carol raised his hand, the one she had in hers and kissed the back of his, grime and all. “I love you.”

Her words were barely above a whisper, but he knew he had heard them. It wasn’t like it was the first time she had told him, told them, that she loved them. But it was the first time she had told him, and him alone. It wasn’t followed by her declaration of love to their own little family, or to his brothers. It was for him, and just him.

“Now go!” Daryl noted how some of her strength had come back after her declaration, as if letting him know had given her the second push she needed to get through this.

“I, I…” He had no words to express what he felt, and she knew that.

“I know.” Her smile was sad, but there was love in her eyes. He gave her a sad smile of his own, before turning on his back and leaving. He was going to get those medications, if failure was not an option before, it was even less now. He had to save his family, and he was going to do just that.

-.-.-.

“Remember when it was you helping me walk across some jail cells,” Connor asked Murphy as the two of them slowly made their way towards the cell block that was being use as a quarantine.

“Bollocks, you were fucking heavy.”

“And you’re such a daunty little thing, aren’t ya?”

“Fuck this,” Murphy muttered as he tried to stand more on his own feet, only grunting when they failed him and he fell more into Connor.

“Stop being a fucking wanker,” Connor said as he crouched and put his free arm under Murphy’s knees, pulling him to carry him.

“Fuck you,” Murphy muttered as he let his head drop on his brother’s shoulder.

“Whatever Murph,” Connor said softly as he continued on his way. “Is not like it’s the first time I carry you like this.”

“That is a story I really need to know.” Both brothers raised their heads to look at Carol, who had obviously been crying but was not standing at the door of their destination, keys in her hands.

Murphy tried to say something, only to have another coughing episode to start. Connor and Carol shared worried glances, over his head.

Carol felt like she was going to start crying once again, as she moved to open the door to the cell block.

Connor gave her a small smile as he moved to take his brother inside. There was no need for words, he knew she understood his position. Where Murphy went, that was where he was going to be at. Always.

“Take care of him?” Carol asked softly as she moved to start closing the door. Tears were running down her cheeks, as the chorus of coughing people echoed inside.

“Always.”

-.-.-.-

She felt so impotent. Connor and her had done everything within their power to try and stop what was happening, and nothing had come out of it. As much as Connor had said that they had done the humane thing, the Christian thing, it still felt like this, especially after having Murphy fallen sick too, was some kind of punishment from God for all of their bad deeds.

And to make it even worse, the fucking water hose was probably full of muck and she was being unable to get Hershel the water he needed. The water everyone needed.

There was no one else. Everyone was either sick, or busy with something. Except for Rick, Maggie and her; and she had no idea where the other two where.

Silently, her hands still shaking because of the anxiety the whole situation was causing her, she set up the walker distractors Connor had come up with, and dashed to do the dirty work no one else was up for doing it.

She saw Rick, she saw the walkers, but they needed that water. That water could mean the difference between life and dead for some of those people, and she was not going to be the reason for another one of them to die. She refused to not do anything and letting them die.

Rick was furious once she was back in, but if she was honest, she did not give a rat ass about him. The only three people that she would care about what they thought weren’t there at the moment, and one, if not two of them were going to need that water. And she had gotten them that water.

She could feel his eyes on her back, glaring as she moved to pump up more water. They all had a job to do, and she was going to do it.

.-.-.-.

The car was silent as they cruised away from the prison. Daryl’s hands had been shaking so bad, that he had thrown the keys to Zach before throwing himself into the passenger seat and slamming the door behind him.

No one asked why Bob and Tyreese were coming instead of his brothers, and he thanked both Zach and Michonne in his head for it.

The silence was killing him. He usually was a man of few words, but the tension in the car was just making him want to be back with his brothers and Carol at the prison, and he couldn’t let himself think of that.

“Hey,” Daryl said as he turned slightly to look at Michonne who was sitting in between the two men. “You know I didn’t mean that? About you running away…”

“You did.”

“Is just the trail went cold, you know I wanted to catch that son of a bitch more than anyone.”

“I know,” Michonne nodded slightly, “but I also know that you were right, I was running away.”

“I’m still sorry.”

“That’s a first, a man apologizing for being right.”

“Pffft,” Daryl said turning towards the front again, putting up his foot to rest against the console.

“The feet.” Zach said as a second nature, not even looking at Daryl as he did so.

“Fuck you.”

“Let’s see if there’s something on the radio,” Michonne said as she moved between the seats, starting to fumble with the radio. “Hand me one of those cds over there.” She said continuing to fumble with the radio, pointing towards the space in front of Daryl.

“Sanctuary…” the word was heard in between static, making everyone jump slightly.

“Was that a voice?” Bob said from the back seat, quickly being shushed by Daryl as he took over Michonne moving the radio dial.

“everyone….survives… keep alive.” The three people basically up front now looked at each other, just before Zach looked up ahead again, slamming the brakes and turning the wheel as he slammed into a walker standing in the middle of the road.

“Shit!” Daryl said as Michonne was lunged towards him, righting her so she was sitting on his lap.

Zach continued swerving through the walkers on the road, coming to a half a few yards later.

“Fuck my life.” Daryl muttered as they saw the thousands of walkers standing between them and their mission.

“Shit, shit, shit!” Zach started screaming as the group of walkers closest to them realized they had live people close and started jumping over the front of the car.

“Back!” Zach didn’t need to hear it twice, changing gears and slamming the pedal to try and get them out of the mess they were in. They were able to back up for a few yards, slamming into some of the walkers until suddenly they stopped.

“We’re jammed!” The panic in the boy’s voice made Daryl start to think, they had to get out of there or they were going to be goners.

“We run towards the ditch!” He yelled, pointing towards his side of the car. “You go first, Zach you follow her!”

“You two!” He turned quickly to look at a panicked Bob and at an oddly calm Tyreese. “You run to the woods like the devil himself was on your tail.”

“Ready?!” He looked at Michonne who nodded to him, before she slammed the door open. At the same time, he pushed the sunroof off shooting at the first walker that tried to grab him. He slammed his knife on the next one as he slid down the windshield.

“Zach! With Michonne!” He looked quickly to see where his young charge was, happy to see him close to Michonne.

He threw a look over his shoulder to see where Tyreese and Bob where. But before he could he had to turn and continue on his way. The number of walkers was incredible, and as soon as he took one down, there was another already on its place.

He could hear Bob yelling for Tyreese behind him, but he didn’t dare to turn and look until he reached Michonne and Zach in their position closer to the woods, in the outskirts of the herd.

“Ya, alright?” He asked looking both of them over quickly, before reloading his crossbow and shooting a walker that was getting close to Bob.

Tyreese had gotten out of the car, and Daryl watched as the man yelled at the walkers attracting them towards him.

“Ty!” Bob yelled, as he made a move to go and try and join Tyreese. Daryl stopped him with a hand on his arm. There were too many of them, they still had a mission to complete.

“Come on,” Daryl said as he started herding what was left of his group towards the woods. Not daring to look over his shoulder at where Tyreese was still yelling at the walkers surrounding them. There was nothing else they could do.

They weren’t in the clear yet. As they made their way through the woods there were still walkers appearing out of nowhere. Daryl grabbed Zach by the backpack he was wearing, pulling him out of the way of a walker that was creeping out on him.

“This way!” He yelled at them, making a turn and running until they stopped seeing walkers around. He was the first one to let out a deep breath, looking over his companions for injuries as they all tried to catch their breaths.

“Wait!” he said as he reloaded his crossbow when he saw Michonne ready to start running again. A rustling in the bushes made them all stop, pointing their guns towards whatever was about to appear.

Daryl raised his crossbow, ready to drop the two walkers that appeared. Only to stop when one of them dropped suddenly, the huge form of Tyreese standing behind it.

“Lucky Motherfucker,” Daryl muttered as he watched Tyreese kill the other walker, before he joined them.

“Let’s move!” They had no more time to lose, they needed to find a way to get into that building, and they needed to do it at once.

-.-.-.

“Jesus Christ, this tastes disgusting.” Murphy muttered as Connor helped him sit up to drink the tea Hershel had brought him, not so long ago.

“Shut up you ponyboy and drink your fucking tea.”

“Fuck you.” Murphy muttered as he took another sip of the tea.

“I miss mam’s tea.” Murphy said softly a few minutes later, after another coughing spell finally passed. He was lying down, with his head on Connor’s lap, his brother running his hands on his shaggy sweat matted hair.

“I miss mam’s food.”

“I don’t miss mam’s food.” The two of them shared a couple of chuckles, before Murphy groaned as he turned on his side, hiding his face on Connor’s stomach.

“You’re going to be just right, Murph.”

“Con?” Connor hated how young his brother’s voice sounded. They were old for fucks sake, but at that moment, he felt like they were eight all over and he had had to sneak back into their room because Murphy was sick and their mam was trying to avoid Connor getting sick too.

“You should have gone with Decks, he needs you more than I do.”

“Declan can take care of himself, he’ll be alright.”

Silence reigned once more in their cell, and Connor thought Murphy had fallen asleep once more.

“I’m glad you’re here with me.”

“There was no way I was going to be anywhere else.”

-.-.-

Carol sighed, looking at the sky and seeing it was barely midday. She was down by the pump, getting more water. The sick needed fluids, and there was definitely more sick than healthy by then. She tried not to get mad, but neither Maggie, Andrea, nor Rick had been there to help so far. It had fallen to her, once again, to pick up their slack.

The weight of the two water containers she was carrying was almost too much for her, her shoulders were protesting at the amount of weight she was carrying. But she continued on, they needed to get this water boiled and ready for them to be able to consume. It wouldn’t be of any good if they caught salmonella just after they made it through the flu.

“That was a stupid thing you did?” Carol sighed, turning slightly to look at where Rick was standing up the stairs looking down on her. Nothing new there. “Out there.”

Carol huffed, turning to continue on her way. She did not had time for games. “They need water, I get them water, simple as that.”

And to think that a year ago she would have never thought of doing something like that? Talking back to someone that exuded power like Rick. She had her boys to thank for that.

She looked as Rick started walking down the stairs, his eyes never leaving hers. And she wasn’t sure she liked what she see. There was that unhinged look in his eyes, the one he had gotten that morning, and she wasn’t sure it wasn’t exactly aimed at her.

“You know, you do a lot for us, for the kids.” Carol had to keep herself from giving him a smart ass answer, something that she had clearly picked up from Murphy. “Sacrifice a lot.” Carol took a step back as Rick took one closer to her.

“I do what needs to be done.” He knew. There was something in his eyes, in the way he was looking at her, he knew.

Rick took a step closer to her, lowering his voice even though there were the only two people out there. They could be the only two people still healthy for all that it was. “Is there anything you wouldn’t do for this people?”

He already knew the answer. She would die for her people. She would kill for her people. “No.” Her voice was strong, as she turned on her heel and started making her way back to the people that needed her.

“Carol,” Rick said as he watched her walk away from him. His voice sounded somewhat sad, as if he knew the answer already. She stopped, but didn’t turn to look at him.

“Did you kill Karen and David?”

Had she? She had plunged the knife into the back of David’s head when he had been wheezing and turning blue. She had been the one to let Connor know what was going on. She had been the one to take the first step by standing outside their cells hearing them as they slowly drowned on their own fluids.

“Yes.” The answer was a simple word, but there was nothing simple about what she had done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was a wild ride... wasn't it? 
> 
> I know, I know... I'm sorry (I actually am). I think I avoided finishing this cause I knew what was coming... and well... we know how great things get from here... don't we all?
> 
> Please don't doubt in leaving me a message, or dropping by in [ Tumblr ](http://geektaire.tumblr.com) I love getting to know you guys, and hearing your comments and everything.


	4. Indifference

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my usual beta [ Onequarterbritish ](http://onequarterbritish.tumblr.com) has been a little bit of trouble with beta-ing cause she's been (inher words) 'teaching sassy teenagers about anthropology' and she will try to be back for the next chapter... so I have  Alannastara  both to thank for beta-ing this chapter as well as for all her nice words of encouragement as well as the trading of cute MacDixon AU headcanons ...
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy, please remember that I love you so so much.

**Chapter IV**

**Indifference**

 

“How is he feeling?”

“You know Murph, he’s a fucking drama king.” Connor said as he leaned into the window separating them, his hands pressed into it as he looked at Carol from inside the containment area.  At her worried look he continued. “He’s doing fine, his fever went down a little bit with the tea that the old man gave him, he’ll be back to causing mayhem in no time.”

Carol nodded, sighing as she moved to put a hand over where his was pressed against the other side. “And you?”

“I’m fit as a fiddle, love, don’t worry about me.” She nodded again, moving back as she crossed her arms over her chest. “How are you doing? Did you get some sleep? Hope we’re not running you too ragged out there.”

“I have just been bringing water from the well and boiling it, nothing major.”

“I know that face, there’s something else.” Connor gave her a look from across the window and Carol couldn’t help but smile.

“Just had a small run in with Rick, he’s a dick.”

Her smile grew a little bit more as she heard Connor laugh at her words, shaking his head as he tried to sober up as the people behind him started coughing once again. “Murphy is going to bitch so much at having missed that.”

The sound of shuffling had Connor turning to look over his shoulder, to see as Lizzie made her way towards the window. The girl looked pale, but yet the look on her face had not changed from that cold exterior he had seen the day before; she might be sick, but he still had a bad feeling about that girl. He looked back to see Carol, and any thoughts of saying anything to her about the girl flew out of his head.

There was that look again in her eyes, the one he had seen the day before. Carol had taken completely into heart what Ryan had told them the day before, and he was not going to cause any more angst in her heart at that moment. There would be time for that later.

“You alright, darling?” Connor asked as he moved a little, to let the girl see Carol standing on the other side of the glass.

“They told me to come down here.” Lizzie slowly approached the glass, eyeing Connor from the side of her eyes.

“Are you okay?” The girl nodded and Carol did as well. “Good.”

Connor was looking at Carol’s face all the time. There was something he had never seen before there, and he couldn’t pinpoint what it was exactly. But that didn’t help to calm the anxiety he felt bubbling in his chest.

Carol was not meeting his eyes, her attention was fully on the little girl at his side.

“I wanted to see you…” Connor looked down at the girl at his side, trying not to flinch as Carol’s more pragmatic side made an appearance. “I’m going on a run with Rick.”

“What?” Connor said, looking up to her so fast his neck hurt. Carol acted like she hadn’t heard what he said, her attention still on the girl at his side.

“Do you think Daryl’s dead?”

Those words made both Carol and Connor visibly flinch.

“What?!” Connor said once again, looking down at the girl who only had eyes for Carol. He felt like shaking her to stop her from saying such things.

“No!” Carol’s eyes finally met his, and he knew what he was seeing in her eyes was a reflection of what was in his. “He just had to go far away to get the medicines,” Carol’s eyes didn’t waver from his, and Connor gave her a small nod. “It’s just going to take him a while to get back.”

Connor put a hand on Lizzie’s shoulder, nodding to the girl as she looked up at him.

“We lost all of our food from cell block D, so we need to find more… anything we can find, really.” Lizzie nodded, looking down at her hands while Connor tried to muster a smile for Carol. For the first time he felt like something inside of him was breaking in half, the need to stay with Murphy barely stronger than his need to go with Carol.

“No one has died yet,” Lizzie said, and Connor could see Carol frown at the dejected tone in the girl’s voice.

“Yet?”

“I think a lot of people are going to die, that’s what always happens.” Connor’s hand on Lizzie’s shoulder tensed at the girl’s words. “It makes me sad, but at least they come back.” There was not an ounce of sadness in that girl’s voice, and Connor yet again vowed to himself to talk to Carol about the girl after this worked out.

“Lizzie…” Carol’s attention was fully on Lizzie then, worry clear in her posture. “When they come back, they’re not the same as they were.”

“But at least they’re still there, they’re something.”

“Lass,” Connor interrupted her before she could continue. He could see that both of them were getting riled up, and that wasn’t the best thing for either of them at that moment. “Why don’t you go back and get some rest, you still need to drink your tea from the old man.”

Lizzie frowned up at Connor, before seeking Carol’s approval through the glass. Carol gave her a nod letting her know it was alright with her. Lizzie started walking back where she came from, looking over her shoulder towards Carol when she was about to stop being visible. Carol gave her a small wave, mustering enough energy to give her a small smile.

“She’s just scared,” Connor whispered looking at Carol once Lizzie was out of hearing range. “She’s afraid of what’s going to happen to her, to everyone.”

“I was scared once too,” Carol said, her eyes looking at the ledge of the glass window instead of meeting Connor’s eyes. “But I had to push pass that, I pushed, and pushed, and pushed until one I was not.”

“That’s a vile lie…” Carol flinched, looking up at Connor like he had slapped her. “You are trying to convince yourself but that’s not the truth, you are afraid, but that doesn’t mean being scared is a bad thing.”

Carol’s eyes filled with tears, and Connor saw as she started to try and make herself smaller. As if that could keep the fear at bay. “Being scared is what keeps us alive, so be scared but don’t let fear rule what you do.”

“Connor,” Carol’s voice was barely above a whisper as tears started to fall down her cheeks. Connor moved so his hands were again resting against the glass, his forehead against it too. Carol moved to copy his actions, on the other side. “Please be careful, please I’m begging you.”

“I knew I would have you begging at some point in our relationship.” Carol couldn’t help but chuckle as she rolled her eyes, her tears still falling down her cheeks.

“I love you Con.” Their blue eyes met through the glass, “I love you so much.”

“I know, love.” Connor smiled at her, moving one of his hands to touch where her cheeks would be if it wasn’t for the glass. “And I love you so much too. Please be careful.”

“I will. Tell Murph I love him?”

“If I have to…”

-.-.-.-

Daryl tried not to stare. They had been able to find a cave which they had huddled in during the night, barely sleeping when they had the chance. He woke everyone up as soon as the sun rose, letting them sleep long enough to keep from falling all over themselves. They needed to get to those medications, and fast.

Tyreese was down by the small stream they were somewhat following, and he couldn’t help but look at the man as he took off his bloody shirt and tried to clean it somewhat. Zach and Michonne were trying to come up with a route to try and get to where they had to be.

Daryl looked up to the sky, sighing as he calculated the time of day. It was a little after midday, they had been too long away from the prison for his taste.

His mind went back to his brothers: he hoped Murphy was doing alright; and also that Connor hadn’t fallen ill with whatever that damned thing was. He realized then that his free hand had unconsciously moved to touch the tattoo on his neck, the tattoo that for him marked him as one of them.

He remembered the care Murphy had taken while using the pen he had rigged up to be able to tattoo without a gun; he remembered Carol’s small hand in his as he hissed at every poke of the needle in his skin. He remembered the smile on Connor’s face as he said that they matched, the impish look in Carol’s eyes as she took in her three tattooed men, the laughter in Murphy’s voice as he tried to convince Carol to get one of her own.

“Hey.” Zach’s voice got him out of his own mind as he moved to stand by his side, following his eyes to the man by the creek. “Michonne and Bob think they got a route.”

“Alright,” Daryl said before he cupped his hands around his mouth, “yo, Ty! Let’s go! Vámonos!”

He took the bag from Zach’s hands, shouldering it as he followed Michonne who was leading the way. Daryl looked over his shoulder as he heard Zach stop to try and wait for Bob who was still calling for Tyreese to join them.

“We don’t have time for this bullshit,” Daryl muttered to Michonne as he huffed and continued down the path, knowing that she would follow. “We’re already running way behind schedule.”

“Daryl, he’s grieving.”

“And if we don’t move we will all be grieving,” Daryl said spit flying from his mouth as he glared at Michonne. They had stopped to glare at each other, only noticing that Zach had finally caught up with them when the boy stepped on a bunch of dry leaves.

“Let’s move it!” Daryl said without a second glance. Murphy had been sick for a good 18 hours by then; his brother needed the medications and he needed them fast.

-.-.-.

The tension in the car was unbelievable.

They had left the prison behind, a few miles between their home and them, and not a word had been exchanged between the two of them. She could see how hard Rick was gripping the steering wheel and it made her even more anxious than she already was.

She felt her eyes start to water, looking up to try and keep the few treacherous tears that wanted to make a run for it from falling. Rick kept throwing her glares when he thought she was not paying attention, and she was sick of them. She was tired, she was worried, and she had barely slept the night before.

Having their bed just for her had felt all kinds of wrong. She had been so uncomfortable inside what had become their sanctuary, she had taken her blanket and moved to keep watch at the door of the administration building. No one was getting through to those kids as long as she lived.

“You know,” Carol said as she looked outside, trying to blink back tears once again, “Andrea wanted to come, there’s a lot of stuff I could have been doing back home.”

“Someone had to stay back, keep everything under control.”  Rick’s voice was rough, and it made Carol shudder.

“You mean someone other than the actual person that knows what to do? Or do you mean someone you can trust?”

Silence was her only answer.

She waited a few minutes. She had no idea how he knew she had been involved. Connor and her had made sure everything was clean, and that there was no blood trace in case the disease was spread through it. She had been on her way down to make sure that the bodies were still burning when she ran into Ty, and then everything had gone down.

“They were drowning in their own fluids.” She was looking out the window, to the Georgia woods as they drove by. “They were suffering, I made it quick.”

She was not going to drag Connor into the mess. If Rick wanted someone to yell at? Someone to blame for a decision that had been made in a moment where no one else was available to make them? That would be her.

Rick’s silence made her wonder for a moment. She had seen her friend change; she had seen how he could get in moments of high stress. A fleeting doubt ran through her head, what if she didn’t make it back to prison? Would Rick dare to do something to her while on the run? Had there been more than him not trusting her in his decision to leave Maggie at the prison?

“We needed to keep the disease from spreading,” Carol dared a look at Rick, looking away just as fast. “They were the only ones sick, burying them wouldn’t have done anything to keep the disease at bay, they had to be burnt.”

She really had no idea from where the feeling of explaining their decision came, and then, in that moment, when she realized that what she was doing was trying to give Rick excuses, she fell silent.

She owed nothing to Rick. She had made the call, and she would face the council’s consequences once things were back to normal. Rick had no idea of the circumstances. Rick had no right to judge her. Rick had no power over her.

They were both still silent as Rick turned and entered the housing development.

-.-.-.-

Murphy’s fever flared up once again. Connor sighed as he changed the wet rags he had been using for his brother’s forehead and stomach once again, trying not to cry because of how pale he looked.

He tried not to react as Hershel walked past the cell they had taken over, knowing that the old man was running in between all of the patients. He knew that he should be out there, helping Hershel, that’s what his duty as a good Christian should be. But he ignored him. When it came to his brothers, he was not a good Christian.

“How’s he doing?” Connor looked to the cell opening only to see Glenn leaning against the bars, looking in at where Murphy was lying down. He looked probably as bad as his brother, but he was not following Hershel’s suggestion of actually getting rest.

“Probably as good as you, lad.”

Glenn made a face, as he moved until he was able to slide down the wall his knees up to his chest as he looked as Connor touched Murphy’s forehead once again. Once it felt like he was satisfied with his work, Connor moved to sit by Glenn.

“You should be getting some rest too. Maggie is going to kill you if you let this son of a bitch kill you.”

“You sound just like Daryl when you say that,” Glenn said, looking at him with a smile that looked more like a grimace.

“Little brother is gonna come through, man, he’s gonna get you those meds.”

“It might be too late,” Glenn murmured as he turned back to look at Murphy’s sleeping form.

“I have faith it won’t.”

-.-.-.-

They had been walking for at least a mile. The five of them had fallen silent, the weight of the implications of them failing the mission, as well as the dangers that lurked inside the forest of Georgia, kept them all at bay.

Even usually chatty Zach was walking silently, his guard up while he watched Michonne’s and Daryl’s backs.

Daryl was trying his best to keep his mind on the mission, to keep his thoughts focused and alert. He was not really doing a great job at it.

A million thoughts were running through his head, things he could have done to try and prevent what was happening, things that could be happening at the moment now that he was gone, things that could eventually happen if they didn’t get back on time. Every thought that came into his mind added a weight to his shoulders. By the time he looked down at the ground he was walking on, he was feeling like the weight of the world was on his shoulders.

His eyes found it immediately. There, in the middle of that lost path in the woods of Georgia, in the middle of the leaves and common rocks. There was a small green rock right in his path, almost as if he was meant to run into it.

He felt a small smile try to make its way to his face as he crouched down to pick it up, noticing that Michonne had stopped as well but paying no mind. The weight of the jasper stone felt right in his hand, like it belonged. He chuckled, putting one of his fingers in his mouth and using his saliva to clean it a little bit, just to make sure his suspicions were right.

“Is that jasper?” Michonne said, making him squint up at her, grunting his response before he continued cleaning it. The salty flavor of dirt in his mouth was no deterrent, as he used his saliva once again to try and clean the small stone. He could feel as Zach and the rest of them finally started to catch up with them.

“I like the color; it brings out your eyes.” He shook his head, chuckling a little as he looked up to see Michonne smiling down at him.

“It’s Carol’s favorite color,” Daryl grumbled as he got back to his feet, starting to walk down the path once again. “It’s also her birthstone.”

“Wait,” Michonne stopped him with a touch of her hand on his arm, laughter in her eyes as she looked at him, “are you telling me, you, Daryl Dixon, know about birthstones.”

“I know shit.” Daryl’s words made Zach start laughing, shaking his head as he looked back to see where Bob and Tyreese were at.

“But you...” Michonne hurried to catch up with him when he started walking at a fast pace again. “are picking up pretty rocks for a girl?”

“You could be doing it too, if you stay at that place for longer than a few hours.” Daryl didn’t get an answer, and he didn’t really expect one as he hurried down the path. They were almost there.

.-.-.-

It felt like the settlement was haunted. Carol looked hurriedly at Rick as they each moved on their own once they had gotten out of the car. The silence felt constricting, it felt like there was something just under the surface that was terrifying. It felt like every single time they were out of the protection the prison gave them.

They both approached the car in front of theirs, opening the driver side doors and peering inside. The car was something Carol would have wanted to have before the end began, something she could have used to drive Sophia and her friends around, something she would have probably never gotten.

“You’re acting like they’re not going to come back.”

“It’s wiped clean; it couldn’t have been here for more than a day or two.” Rick said as he pointed to the clean windshield, and Carol couldn’t help but feel her temper rise.

“You know I’m talking about Daryl and the rest, this is about them, in case they don’t come back?”

“Until they do, we have to act like they aren’t.” Carol felt the tug on her heart once again, throwing a quick prayer for her hunter, for him to come back to her. “Meds, cabinets, first aid kits first; anything that Hershel could use.”

“We get in, we get out.” Carol didn’t feel any safer by Rick taking command of their run, not like when she had been following Glenn or any of the others; but there was no time for that now. “And if we can eat it, we take it.”

Carol nodded following silently behind Rick. She threw a look around the houses, the eerie feeling had not gone away.

.-.-.-

Murphy had finally gotten sick, not literally though, of Connor’s hovering. His fever had gone down a little bit, and he had been able to drink some more of that tea without puking his guts out, so Connor had finally caved in and had gone to help Hershel with his rounds.

The state of some of the other people, especially those that were elderly, was so different from how his brother and Glenn were doing. He had even taken some time off to go tuck in Lizzie, knowing that it would be something Carol would have done has she been there.

He had been tending to one of the elders when he heard someone knocking on the door. He felt like his heart was about to burst out of his chest at the implication of that, as he hurried to help the older woman lie down once again. Someone else was sick. And the only people he knew were out there were Andrea, Maggie, and the kiddies.

He hoped it was not any of the children.

“Carl?” He asked out loud as he looked through the door’s window, looking around when the boy made a shushing motion with his hands, pointing him towards where their unofficial visiting place was. Connor looked around, making sure there wasn’t anything important going on before he practically ran towards where he knew Carl would be waiting for him.

“What in Christ’s name are you doing here, Carl? You’re supposed to be staying away from this!” Connor would feel bad about the way the boy jumped up when he first started talking later, there was no time for that right then.

“How’s Murph? Is he alright?” Those words melted away all the anger Connor could have against the boy, any thought of scolding him for not doing what he was told was swept away by those two questions.

“He’s still in there, being his usual bitching self,” Connor answered, trying to muster up enough energy to smile at his brother’s young friend.

“Con…” the seriousness in the boy’s voice made him sober up. And in that moment he could see what Murphy had told him more than once that the boy could be. He could see both the young man and the little boy that were inside of Carl Grimes; and he felt the stirrings of the protectiveness he only usually reserved for Murphy, Daryl and Carol. “How is he, really?”

“His fever goes up and down, he’s been coughing so much he’s been puking his guts out.” Connor sighed as he rested his forehead against the glass, closing his eyes. “He had a really bad spell like an hour ago, it was almost like he was choking and there was nothing I could do.”

Connor didn’t dare to look at Carl. There was a feeling of impotence in him, the feeling of helplessness that he couldn’t do anything for his brother, for Murphy! For the only person that had always been there for him, for his soulmate; that he just couldn’t dare to look at someone that loved him too, couldn’t dare to look and see shame or disappointment.

“He told me not to tell, but I caught him cheating when you guys were playing cards the other day.” Connor frowned, pushing back and looking at Carl. The boy looked sad, but there was a certain mischief in his eyes that reminded him of Murphy. “He told me that he would kick my ass if I told, so tell him he has some ass kicking to do.”

“I will lad, I will.”

\--.-.-.-

They needed to find a car, and fast. Daryl had fallen behind, to cover the group’s back and at the same time stay away from a pissed off Michonne. He knew his comment would get on her nerves, but he also knew it was something that needed to be told.

He was bad at this whole thing, at having people that care for him and that he cared for in return. But he had them, and he was for once in his life somewhat happy and loved. And he had made the mistake of not telling them before he left, and he was trying oh so hard to stay in a good mindset about it but he couldn’t help but think. What if?

What if they came back and something had happened to his brothers? What if he came back and something had happened to Carol and he wasn’t able to say those words, words that he felt to the bottom of his heart, back? What if something happened to him and they never got to hear those words from him?

That’s what prompted him to pick up that stone for Carol, that’s what made him tell Michonne that. He wanted his friend not to have regrets, and in this world? Regret was the one thing they could not afford to have.

They approached the rundown town and he started to truly be on the look-out. He stopped, letting the others move ahead, to investigate the weird form the bushes had on the outside of the structure they were passing.

“Did you see something?” He absentmindedly heard Bob say something to him, answering as he moved towards the bushes. He couldn’t help but smile at the stroke of luck as he found a car underneath it.

“Get that shit off it, I’m going to see if it starts!” Daryl told the others as he turned to find them all looking at him, carefully once he made sure there were no walkers inside, he tried to open the driver’s side door cursing when he was unable to.

“Gonna try the other side,” he mumbled as he saw Zach looking at him. The boy just gave him a look that he chose to ignore, what did the little shit know anyway?

The door opened, and without caring about the rest of them, he put his bag down and threw himself under the console. “Please turn on, please turn on,” Daryl muttered to himself as he pulled out the cables, hearing as the rest of the guys uncovered the car from under the plant.

“Fuck!” He sighed as he dropped the cables, getting out of the car, and grabbing his crossbow. “We need to find a new battery,” he said, while looking at the ragtag group that he had with him. It appeared that the thought of not having to walk anymore had brightened up Michonne considerably since the woman had stopped openly glaring at him.

He shrugged looking around, noticing the dirty window for the first time. He approached it, putting his fingers on his tongue before trying to wipe it clean to be able to see inside. “Son of a bitch!” Daryl yelped, ducking slightly as a walker inside the store slammed itself to it.

“We have some company inside,” he said over his shoulder, “let’s go.”

They walked around the structure, looking for the way in. He stopped once they were facing where the doors to the store should be, now fully covered by vines after almost two years of not being in use.

“We need to find a path, a way to get inside.” Daryl started to pull at the vines, grunting when a big one gave away. The rest of them started to help, Michonne pulling out her sword and Tyreese his machete to start hacking at them.

“Go easy on them, we don’t know what we can find.” Daryl said loudly to Tyreese, as he started hacking at the vines without a care.

“Asshole,” Daryl muttered to Zach as the two of them continued to pull at the plant to try and find where the door was.

They all stopped to look as Tyreese pulled his machete out after getting it stuck, only to have a bunch of wires trapped on top of it. Daryl huffed, pushing at Zach’s shoulder to make the boy go back to work.

He was still looking at Zach when two arms appeared from between the vines and grabbed him by his shirt. “Ahhhh!”

Zach grabbed Daryl by the backpack he was wearing, pulling him away from the walker that had suddenly appeared from between the vines. Michonne turned and hacked the walker’s arms off as he made a move to grab Zach’s arm to bite.

Daryl quickly pulled his knife out of his sleeve, stabbing the armless walker through the head. Pushing Zach behind him and turning to look at him. “You okay?” He asked Zach as he moved to watch what was going on with the other two walkers.

He watched as Michonne helped Bob with his, while Tyreese clearly didn’t want any help with his. He felt his blood was boiling as he watched Tyreese grab onto the walker and not let go, even as all of them yelled at him to do so; falling down to the ground with the walker still over him. It wasn’t until he grabbed the walker and threw it off him, with Bob shooting it in the head that peace and quiet returned.

He felt like he was about to explode. He could feel Michonne and Zach’s eyes on him as he paced by Tyreese’s prone form. He wanted to wring that man’s neck. He was just putting all of them in danger.

He saw Tyreese start to kneel up, and quickly helped him up before slamming his hands against his chest. “What the fuck are you doing?” He knew better than everyone there how bad Tyreese could get, he knew he was unstable, he knew he shouldn’t have brought him. “Are you fucking stupid? Or do you not fucking care about what we’re doing here? Is that it?”

Down inside himself, he knew not everything was Tyreese fault. But there was this feeling of impotence within him, that he had no idea how to express than how he had always expressed everything. Through violence and anger. “Do you want to die? Do you? Cause if that’s the fucking case, I’m gonna fucking leave you right here, right now.”

He went to push the unresponsive man back once again, only to be pulled back by whom he knew was Zach. He pulled away from him, huffing and puffing; moving back to pace by himself a couple of more times.

He needed to get back home, now.

-.-.-.-.-

She tried not to let her guard down around the two kids they had just found. Because that was what they were to her, kids. They had been so scared as they looked down to the barrel of Rick’s gun, that she couldn’t help but want to help them, that was just who she was.

“And how did this happen?” She tried not to worry about Rick at the moment, he was prowling around the house, looking for whatever it was that Rick looked for.

“Greenhouse around the corner,” the boy, Sam, looked at her like she was doing something great for him, and she tried to avoid his eyes.

“We were looking for a place to crash…” the way Sam looked at the girl, Anne, was like she was his sun, and the longing for her men was brought back tenfold. She wanted to get back to the prison as soon as possible, she had to get back to the prison as soon as possible. “The roof has broken down, so it’s been getting rain, it’s full of fruit.” Carol continued cleaning the boy’s wound as she heard Anne’s words. Fruit, wasn’t that a discovery?

“We were there, when the skin eaters showed up.” Sam started goofily chuckling and Carol frowned as she looked down at him.

“They’re killjoys man…” his blue eyes looked up to her, actual joy in the middle of the shithole that was their lives and she looked back to his wound, “always fucking up the whole world. I used to think everyone was an asshole before all this went down.” He was looking down at where he was fiddling with a loose threat of the tablecloth and Carol couldn’t help but think of someone else who had once thought the same way. “Now I love people; you know? People that are alive.”

Carol gave him a small smile, moving her back slightly so Rick was unable to see her. There was just something that was rubbing her the wrong way about his presence there and she really didn’t need another lecture from him for being nice to strangers. “How did this happened?”

“They were coming through the door, tripped as I was getting out through the other side…” Carol started pressing lightly around the joint, frowning when she felt around it. “I pulled out the glass, but the shoulder is still hurts like a bitch.”

“That’s because it’s dislocated.”

“Can you fix it?” The hope in Anne’s voice was palpable and Carol couldn’t do anything other than help.

“Let’s get you lying on your back…”

-.-.-.-.

“Have you eaten anything, old man?” Connor smirked when Hershel glared up at him, from where the man was taking a moment respite from tending to all of his patients. “You haven’t, haven’t you?”

Hershel silence was enough confirmation to him, so he entered the cell that Hershel had taken to using during the small reprieves he took for himself, offering a granola bar and a bottle of water to the old vet.

“You are a saint, Connor MacManus.”

“Thought you didn’t believe in those…” there was a playful tone on Connor’s voice, to which Hershel tried to respond.

“Are you really trying to piss me off right now, lad?”

Connor’s smile became a little bigger at the awful Irish accent Hershel used on the last word.

“You need to work on your Irish accent, we don’t sound anything like that.”

“I’m sorry, what were you saying? Were you actually speaking English? Enunciate correctly, boy.” Connor sighed, chuckling as he sat himself next to Hershel on his bed. The man looked weary, tired; he had clearly barely gotten any sleep the night before, not that he was doing any better.

“You need to rest, old man, can’t have you getting sick on us too.”

“I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”

“Well, if you don’t it might come sooner than we both wish for…” Connor muttered as he clapped Hershel on the back as he stood up and made his way towards the cell door. “I’ll make your rounds now, get a couple of hours of sleep, I’ll wake you if anything changes.”

“And if…”

“I know old man, I’ll do it, don’t worry.”

-.-.-.-

Zach and Bob followed him inside the store. He was still vibrating with anger over his confrontation with Tyreese.

He had needed to get away from Tyreese, he wasn’t sure he wasn’t going to put a bolt in his ass if he didn’t. Yes, he was mourning, but they couldn’t waste any more time because of his tomfoolery. They both had siblings that needed those medications urgently, they could not waste one more minute.

Having Zach at his back helped him calm down a little bit. Bob he did not know, but Zach, Zach he trusted. They cleared the store, thanking whoever was out there that all of the walkers had tried to eat them at the door and they hadn’t had any surprises while looking for the battery.

“There it is,” Daryl muttered as he put the flashlight he had been using in his mouth as he picked up one of the unused car batteries in one of the racks. He took out his hunting knife, using it to open it and flashing light into it.

“The cells look really dry,” Bob muttered from over his shoulder.

“Nothing a little still water won’t fix.” He motioned with his head towards the front, “let’s go.”

The two men followed him as he made his way through the shelves looking for the water. Daryl grimaced as he shone the light down on the floor, looking at the dry remains of someone’s puke. “That’s puke,” he called out to the other two, making a face as he looked at the empty antifreeze container a few steps away. “those fucking douchebags in the vines, they fucking opted out.”

The idea of doing that chilled him to the bone. He wasn’t sure why he had so little care for people that did that, why he hated it so much. Maybe it was because he knew what it did to those left behind, maybe it was that he had always had that hope even deep inside about something better happening eventually. It had only taken the end of the world for it to happen, but it had.  

“Are they douchebags because they wanted to leave together?” Bob asked as he moved to follow Daryl, Daryl looked over the shelf just to make sure Zach was still with them.

“It does if they could have gotten out,” Daryl grunted as he moved to pick up the gallon of still water he found on the shelf, making a face as he stepped over the dried puke. “Their family might still be waiting to see if they had made it, who knows?”

“Everybody makes it, until they don’t.” Daryl ignored Bob, as he continued walking forward. “People are like dominoes, one falls and the others just follow.”

“Right,” Daryl said as he raised his flashlight once again, “but then again there’s always the possibility of something else, you can’t just give up.” The had reached the corner of the store, Daryl rounded it only to find a trapped walker under a fallen shelf. “Come on,” he said to Bob as he pointed the light to the walker.

The two men silently approached the dead man until their boots were by his head, the walker feeling their presence started opening and closing his mouth even more. Bob watched as Daryl stretched himself over the dead man trying to reach something on one of the shelves behind the counter.

“This are Murph’s favorites,” Daryl muttered as he came back with a hand full of Snickers, giving the walker a last look before he stuffed them in his bag, “See, it does sometimes get better.” Turning and leaving both medic and walker behind. They still had a job to do.

.-.-.-

Carol tried to ignore both Sam and Anne’s grateful looks as their eyes followed her as she moved around the house, taking every single thing she could think they could use back home. Their story fit the two of them so good, she wanted to let them come back with them. But at the same time, she knew they didn’t have time at the moment for distractions.

The fact that Sam had taken the burden of saving her from everything that was trying to hurt them since she had gotten hurt, made her think the two of them would be good additions to their home. But at the same time, more people meant more risk.

She could hear Rick asking them more questions as he pretended to scavenge around the house, and she tried to ignore her resentment at his lack of actual work.

“I think we got everything we were going to get from here…” the bag she was carrying was almost full, as she closed it and moved it towards where Rick was. If he was not helping with scavenging, at least she was going to make him carry it. “We should move on.”

“So did we pass your test?” Sam’s voice made her stop and look at him, before her eyes found Rick’s. If it was up to her she would take them with them, but she wasn’t stupid, she knew Rick needed to have his ego stroked and she let him make the call.

“We’re in a prison 8 miles north…” she felt like a weight fell off her shoulders as Rick turned and directed his words to the young couple “if you come back with us we can’t promise you safety, and there’s an illness, a flu, it’s bad.”

She wanted to glare at Rick at the look he gave him when he turned after bringing up the flu; but it was not the time nor the place to confront him about it.

“We’ve lost a lot,” Carol said as she shouldered her half full backpack, “kids too.” The thought of Patrick and his sweet hero worship of Daryl coming to her head at that moment.

“Yours?” It was like a stab to her chest, to think of her kids. Sophia had been lost long before this happened.

“No, thank God.” She approached the two of them, her face a blank mask. “But one of my girls, she has it, and one of my…” she stopped herself, taking a deep breath before she continued “Murphy, he got it too.”

“I’m sorry,” Anne said quickly, taking a step closer to her.

“They’re strong, they’ll make it.” She hoped she was able to project as much certainty as she tried to convince she had. She couldn’t lose them, she wouldn’t.

“You have walls and a fence? We’re in!”

“You’ll get along with Murphy just fine.” Carol stopped herself from commenting any further, although it was the truth. Murphy made sure to befriend almost everyone, and he would definitely have a blast having yet another young man to corrupt.

Sam and Anna smiled at her words. “Whatever you need us to do, we’ll do it.”

“For now we need you two to sit tight, we’ll circle back before dark.” The feeling of dread came back to Carol’s chest, before dark? That was hours away, they needed the medications back at the prison now, not four hours from now.

“Or you could help us sweep the neighborhood, we could finish faster.” She could feel Rick’s judgment the moment she finished her sentence, but she didn’t care. She wanted to get back home as soon as possible, she needed to get back home now.

“We can do that; I can see if there’s anything left in the greenhouse.” Anne said, turning looking from Carol to Rick.

“And I can hit some houses.”

“It’s nice of you to offer, but your shoulder is…” Sam interrupted Rick before he could finish.

“I can make do with my other arm, and if we see it’s cake we’ll do it, if not, we’ll just roll.” The last part of Sam’s sentence was delivered while looking at her, and Carol felt a little regret at putting them in danger just to be able to get back home sooner.

“I mean,” Sam looked at Rick up and down, “you don’t look so good yourself, man.” Carol made note of that moment, knowing Murphy would probably get a kick out of it later on when she told him about it. “Are you righty or a lefty?”

“We would cover more ground,” Carol said as she looked at Rick. “We need to get back there as soon as possible; Hershel needs whatever medication we can find.” Rick was shifting his weight from one leg to the other, and she could see him tightening his jaw. “We can’t afford to go back by nightfall, they could all be dead by then.”

Having said her due, Carol walked past Rick. Rick would do whatever Rick wanted to do, that was clear to her. She was not going to waste one more minute of her time. She was going back home in two hours, whether Rick wanted them to go, or not.

.-.-.-.-

Connor only found out about the first death after it happened. He was actually not in Murphy’s room, having chosen to sit with one of the elderly for a moment, reading to them from the Bible when the defeated form of Hershel walked by.

He had left Mrs. Smith and moved to join him.

“Who was it?” Hershel jumped slightly, turning to look at Connor,  the look on his face pure and unadulterated anguish.

“One of the old people from Woodbury,” Hershel said turning to Connor, his voice low. “I need to take care of him before he reanimates, I was on my way to get my knife.”

“Don’t worry, old man,” Connor said softly, pulling at the knife he carried at his waist. “I got it, go look after the others.”

“Son…” Connor looked up sharply at his words, he hadn’t been called that since his own old man had passed away. “Please don’t let the others know, they don’t need this.”

Connor nodded, making his way towards the side of the cellblock Hershel had just came from. He didn’t care if he had to be the one to do the work no one else did, he could try and find solace in putting those good people to rest once and for all. He just hoped that Hershel would be able to handle it too.

-.-.-.-

Daryl looked at the sun once more, this whole thing had taken him longer than he hoped it would. While he was stripping the car from the old battery, Michonne, Tyreese and Zach went back in to take everything they could find of use from the abandoned store. They were still in there, shoving things into bags and making a lot of noise out of it as he tried to hurry as much as he could.

Bob stood by, watching him work. After having spent six months with his brothers, having this much quiet unnerved him, it felt uneasy. So for the first time probably ever, Daryl Dixon found himself making small talk.

“You never talk about them,” Daryl muttered as he balanced the cigarette in his mouth to be able to talk as he used a wrench to tighten the bolts around the battery. “About the group you were with before?”

“You never talk much about your siblings, fair trade…”

Daryl chuckled, using a hand to push some of his unruly hair out of his face. “Not much to say, they’re both annoying as fucking hell.”

“You’re lucky, I hope you know that…” Daryl looked at Bob as he pulled away from the engine, putting his blade back into the sheath at his waist. “When you found me on that road, I almost kept walking.”

Daryl nodded, as he picked up the gallon of water from the floor. “Why is that?” He said his voice still muffled by the cigarette in his mouth as he moved to start pouring some of the water into the car battery. “

“Two times, two different groups. I was the last one standing.” Daryl did turn to look at him at his words, concerned etched on his face. “It was like I was destined to see it happen over and over again. Like some kind of curse.”

“You were going to opt out?” He motioned with his head towards the store, where they had seen the old walker and the antifreeze.

“Don’t know, thought about it. It’s just when it’s just you out there with the quiet, all the regrets, all those that you couldn’t save, they come back to haunt you.”

Daryl nodded, moving towards the driver’s side and getting into the car. “You should just hang out with my brother Murphy, you would never hear quiet ever again.” Daryl said just before he disappeared underneath the console, laughing the moment the car turned on. They had wheels.

.-.-.-.

It took him three houses to speak to her again.

She had started a routine by then. She went into the house, they cleared it and then she started shoving things into the bag. Anything that looked remotely like medicine went into the bag, no checking labels, no checking expiration dates, there would be time for that later.

“You think I did the right thing?” Rick asked as she was going through the bedside tables of the main bedroom of the third house. There were so many ways she could answer that question, but she knew it wasn’t the moment to anger him even more. “Letting those kids come back with us?”

“As you said,” Carol said as she opened another drawer, “they’re kids, I think it’s the humane thing to do.”

“But do you think that is right?”

“There’s no right and wrong answer right now Rick…” she stopped to look at him where he was standing at the bathroom’s door, “we need people after everyone we have lost so far, they might be good additions to our home.”

“But was it right?”

She sighed as she moved to open another drawer. “Look at us, we’re looking for any scrap of medication that could be the difference between dying right then or in a few more hours. We’re way past thinking in simple terms like right and wrong.”

“If they’re strong enough to help us survive this thing, then yeah, they’re welcome to join us.” She knew she was getting snippy, but there was no time to get philosophical right then. She had to get back to Lizzie and Murphy, she just had to.

“And if they’re not?”

“Then we have nothing to do other than to pray they are.” She turned back to her task, hearing as Rick threw the pill bottle into his bag with more force than necessary.

Carol took a deep breath, closing her eyes and asking God for strength before she opened them. “Rick…” Carol said as she walked the few steps towards the bathroom door, peering down at Rick as he shoved more things into his bag, “what the fuck?”

The use of the foul language did draw Rick’s attention to her and she saw him clench his jaw. “Are you going to get off your high horse any time today? Are you really going to treat me like shit because of what I did?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“Is not about what you have to say, it’s about facing reality, facing our reality.” Her breathing was starting to get faster, and she knew she needed to calm down before the tear works started. She had always been an angry crier. “We need to survive, we might not like what we have to do; but that’s what should be our priority, to get our family to survive.”

Rick was looking at her like he had never seen her before in his life, but she needed to get her point across. “In these times, you can be a farmer Rick; but you can’t _just_ be a farmer.” Their eyes met, and there was so much hatred behind his eyes that Carol felt fear at being in his presence for the first time.

“You were a good leader…” she could see in his eyes the fear of the situation leaving his grasp and she knew she had to find the way to bring him down from there, “better than I ever thought you would be. “

“I never murdered two of our own.”

“You just killed one!” She didn’t mean to raise her voice, but the look of utter disgust he was giving her was too much.

“He was trying to kill me!”

“And so were they.” She was still looking down at him. She would not back down though. “They were a danger to everyone in that prison, a danger to Judith and Carl. They would have killed us all…” Carol chuckled humorlessly, “probably will anyway.”

“You don’t know that.”

“What do you think Rick? What did your detective work tell you?” Carol sneered as she stood and moved back, the anxious energy the whole conversation was causing wanting to come out in any way. “What? Do you know that I killed them in cold blood? Did I drag them out while still alive and light them on fire while I enjoyed their screams of pain?”

“You killed them.”

“They were dying…” Carol said as she opened her arms, “they had been left down there, completely alone. Did you know that Hershel and Dr. S never went to see them even once during that night?”

Rick posture and glare did not change at all as heard her words. “If that would have saved Carl and Judith’s lives, wouldn’t you have done the same? You don’t have to like what I did, I as sure as hell don’t, you just accept it.”

.-.-.-.

“What in God's heavens are you doing out of bed?”

Murphy looked up from where he was sitting on the ground playing checkers with Luke.  
The smile he braved for his brother did nothing to relieve some of his anxiety, it being more of a grimace than an actual smile.

“Just having a friendly tournament with the babies…” Murphy’s smile grew as Luke complained over being called a baby.

“You should be resting, no need to have you out of bed.” Connor looked at Lizzie, who was looking bored as she looked down at where the two males were playing.

“I will, as soon as I finish destroying Lu…” Murphy was unable to finish his sentence because of a coughing fit. Connor tried to smile at both Luke and Lizzie as he patted Murphy’s back, trying to help dislodge whatever that was causing the coughing fit from his lungs.

“Come on, you big oaf,” Connor muttered as he put Murphy’s arm around his shoulders and heaved him into standing, throwing another reassuring smile to the kids as he moved them both outside and towards Murphy’s cell.

“You have to stop coddling me, Con,” Murphy said once the fit had passed and he was sitting on his cot. “Sasha and Glenn are well worse than I am, and they’re out there helping.”

“Well, Sasha and Glenn don’t have an older brother who’s completely healthy that can do whatever they can for them.” Connor muttered as he pushed Murphy until he was lying down,“ and Hershel has told them to take it easy too, they don’t listen to the doctor’s orders.”

“Then why should I?”

“Murph, please don’t do this.” Connor’s back was to Murphy as he stood looking towards the rest of the cellblock, trying to mask his face at the sounds of the sick around him. “Please don’t make me watch you die.”

Connor waited for Murphy’s rebuttal, and was shocked to hear none. He looked over his shoulder, expecting that the only reason why his brother was silent was that he was asleep, only to find Murphy looking right at him.

“Alright, I promise.”

Connor smiled, the first real smile he had managed in the whole day. “Good.”

.-.-.-

“Park right there,” Michonne said as she pointed to an almost empty parking lot two blocks from where they were supposed to be going. “We don’t want to get trapped, if for some reason the place is overrun.”

Daryl did as he was told, silently bracing himself for what was about to come. They had finally made it, they were just a few blocks away from the veterinary school and probably from finally getting the medications. Eighty miles had taken them almost twenty-four hours to get there, and he just hoped it didn’t take them another twenty-four to get back.

“We travel light, be prepared for anything. Silent as possible.” He instructed before he started trotting down the street. They had already lost too much time.

Tyreese was carrying the map, pointing to them where to turn just as he had been doing ever since they finally got back onto the road.

“Seems like we’re getting closer,” Daryl muttered as he looked around the three story buildings in front of them.

“The building we want is over there,” Tyreese said as he pointed to a building not far from them. They went in.

The school was silent, no humans, no animals, but not walkers either. Daryl kept his crossbow up as he opened doors, knowing the rest of the group was behind him. The map Hershel had drawn for them was a little outdated, but it still worked.

It took them about ten minutes to get to the labs, and thankfully they hadn’t had any run-ins with the living or the dead. “Let’s make it quick,” Daryl whispered loudly as they all made their way into the first lab.

The five of them separated, moving around, putting anything that looked of importance into the bags they were all carrying. Daryl just shoved anything that looked important into his, Hershel could later see if it would be useful or not. He looked around to see where everyone was standing, doing a quick headcount just to make sure he hadn’t lost anyone.

Michonne was at his right, while Zach was at his left a few tables between them. Tyreese was closest to the door, while Bob was way in the back. He didn’t look for anyone as he moved onto the next lab, knowing that everyone knew what they were supposed to be doing; how they had already planned this whole thing.

They moved to the next lab; they had many of them to go through.

-.-.-

She had stormed away from the house and Rick in anger. He had quickly caught up with her, but she refused to talk to him. He was judging her; he was judging a decision she had made when there was no one else to do it; just like he had done so many times before.

Carol tried to take a deep breath as she walked across the backyard of the house they had been at, knowing that it would lead back to the houses they had started at. She felt like she was about to start yelling at Rick, or start crying and neither were an option at the moment. She would rant once she was back inside the walls of the prison, once she made sure they were both back alive.

“Hold on one moment!” Rick said as he moved towards some tomato plants that the family living there had clearly been planning on using before it all went to shit. They were full of ripe tomatoes, and as much as she wanted to smash every single one over Rick’s head, she couldn’t afford to be petty when there were so many mouths to feed.

She crouched down, pulling out plastic bags from the side of her backpack, starting to put the fresh produce inside the bags without even glancing at Rick.

“How did you know how to put his shoulder back in? Did Hershel teach you that?”

Carol sighed, understanding what those questions were; a kind of peace offering. “The internet,” she looked up at Rick, a place inside of her rejoicing in the uncomfortable look in his face as he was reminded of her awful past. “It was easier to do it myself than to tell the nurses that I had fallen down the stairs, for the third time that month.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it, the past is the past.” Carol wanted to talk about anything else but him, she never wanted to even think of Ed. Ed didn’t deserve her thoughts, he didn’t even deserve her anger. Ed was a thing of the past, and she was determined to keep him there.

She went back to picking up produce, letting the silence sit for a while. It wasn’t a comfortable silence; it was the car situation all over again.

“Is that why you don’t say her name? Because the past is the past?” Carol looked to see Rick looking down at her, pity in his eyes. Pity that she did not need, nor want.

“None of your fucking business,” Carol said as she stood up, shouldering her bag as she started to move away, leaving Rick behind.

“Sometimes I wake up and expect to have Lori lying down beside me, reminding me that it’s my turn to pick up Carl from school.” She was still standing, her back ramrod straight as he spoke to her like she was a wild animal about to attack.

“Rick, stop.” Carol said softly as she hung her head, trying to breathe deeply.

“Every Sunday, she made this pancakes that were awful…”

“What do you want me to tell you Rick?” Carol said as she turned around to face him once again. “Are you expecting me to tell you my life story because you think I’m someone I’m not? Are you trying to see if I have some redeeming qualities after I have spent the better part of the last six months helping keeping everyone you love and cherish alive? Is that it?”

Rick stayed silent, and Carol didn’t care to wait to hear what he had to say. She turned on her heels and started marching down the backyard. It was almost time anyway for them to go back home.

Rick almost slammed into her back when she stopped suddenly. There in the middle of the backyard as they turned from the other side was an overturned basket. A basket with different kinds of fruits in it.

They hadn’t been as strong as they thought they were.

-.-.-.

“Are they back?” Connor asked as soon as he saw that Maggie and Glenn were talking to each other. He saw the annoyed look Maggie threw at him and he did not care at all.

“Who?”

“Carol, is she back?” His voice was full of hope. It had been hours since she had told him about Rick’s decision of going scavenging. For him it was a stupid ass decision, but he couldn’t say anything about it. He was inside there, he had no idea how things were out there for them. How precarious their situation had become? He had to trust Carol’s judgment, it had never led him astray after all.

“Not yet,” Maggie glared at him from behind the glass. He glared back.

“Man,” Glenn said trying to give him a smile over his shoulder, looking paler than the last time he had seen him not that long ago. “Would you mind getting Hershel here? Maggie wants to talk to him.”

Connor nodded, giving Maggie one last look. He would let Hershel know that he was being looked for, and then he would get back to work. They had a lot to do if they were trying to keep those people alive long enough for either Carol or Daryl get there.

They couldn’t stop fighting just yet.

-.-.-.-

He was going to kill Bob.

If they didn’t get him out of his face, he was going to grab him by the neck and push him into the next herd they got close to. The man had not only endangered his own life, but he had almost taken both Zach and Michonne with him, and all for a bottle.

Daryl stabbed another walker that got close enough in the head, as he led the group towards where they had parked the car. He had told Bob that he would put him down if he drank one sip of that bottle before they got the medications back to their people, but he was not sure he would be able to keep his promise. He wanted to wring his neck at that same moment.

“Daryl…” he felt Zach’s touch on his shoulder, looking at the direction the boy was pointing at. There was a herd of about twenty walkers wandering just on the other side of a chain link fence, they weren’t in imminent danger, but being careless about them could lead them to it.

“No firing, just knives from now on,” Daryl whispered, looking over his shoulder at Michonne and Tyreese. He couldn’t even look at Bob, he couldn’t process what had happened and what almost could have happened because of something like alcohol.

He looked at the walkers, before looking at his group. And at his signal, they ran.

-.-.

The sound of his wedding band against his gun was driving Carol insane. They had gotten to the house, after seeing the remains of Anne being eaten by the walkers, with just a few minutes to spare. They had been waiting there for almost fifteen minutes, and Carol couldn’t take it any longer.

They hadn’t said anything to each other since their little talk in the garden, and she really didn’t have anything else to say to him. He had no right to bring up her daughter, he had no right to look at her like she was the worst thing to ever happen to them, he had no right to forget what he himself had done in defense of their family.

“It’s been too long.” She finally broke the silence that had enveloped them, raising her head from where she had been looking at the table to look to the other side of the room.

“We should give him a couple of more.” Rick’s voice was deeper than usual, rougher than usual, and it sent shivers down Carol’s back. And not the good kind either.

“He might be fine, he really might be,” Carol said as she stood up, taking a step closer to Rick, “but it doesn’t matter, because we have to leave, we have to get these medications back to Hershel, now!”

She and Rick kept eye contact, silence and tension their only companions in that house. There was something shimmering just under the surface, but Carol had no way of explaining what it was. Carol frowned, before turning to pick up her backpack and one of the plastic boxes they had filled with their findings. “I’m sorry, it was a nice watch.”

.-.-.-

“Carol is way better at this than you are,” Murphy said softly as Connor tried to help him back into the bed from helping him to the toilet.

“I’m also sure you bitch a lot less to her, than you do to me.”

“That is actually true.” Murphy moved so Connor could sit at the head of his cot, resting his head on his brother’s lap once he did. “I miss her, it seems stupid but it’s been like a day and I miss her and Daryl.”

“It’s not stupid…” Connor said as he pulled the Bible he had on the floor and opened where he had left off. “I miss them too. It’s weird without them.”

“Con?”

“Shut your whore mouth Murphy Malachy, don’t you even dare to say it.” Connor didn’t take his eyes from the Bible, his jaw clenching knowing that his brother did tend to dabble in dramatics once in a while.

“But Con…”

“No.”

“I love you…”

“Shut up and get some rest.”

.-.-.-.-

Daryl turned the jasper stone in his hand over and over again. They had to stop a few miles from the school to try and come up with a route to get them back to the prison safely and quickly. His anger was still shimmering under the surface, and he just felt so tired, that he decided to leave the route planning to Zach and Tyreese.

The way the stone looked in the light mesmerized him, the soft blue hues he could see when the light hit it just right that reminded him of Carol’s eyes made him feel at least a little bit at peace.

“We’re taking the highway one hundred,” Tyreese said to Daryl as he opened the back door to let Zach go in first.

“I heard,” Daryl answered, still not taking his eyes from the stone. There was a certain anxiety creeping into his chest, that he had no idea where it came from. They had the medications, they had a route to take them home that even if it took them more hours that he wanted, would take them home. There was no real reason for him to feel like he did.

Michonne got into the driver seat, and Daryl moved and closed his door, not taking his feet off the dash nor his eyes from his stone.

“You were right about what you said before,” Michonne said softly to him, neither of them making eye contact, “I was running away.”

“The trail went cold; I don’t need to go out anymore. The thing is, I know she doesn’t feel the same way, and being out there, that’s the only way I can handle being so close to her knowing that she will never love me back like that.”

“If that’s what it takes,” Daryl said as he looked at her squinting from under the hair on his face, “I will take you out hunting every fucking day.”

“Good,” Michonne whispered as she closed the door and turned on the car, driving off as soon as Bob and Tyreese got in.  

“Good.”

.-.-.-.-.-.

They moved the plastic crates and bags into the green car in complete silence. The walkers that had snacked on Anne hadn’t seemed to realize that only a block away there was some fresh meat for them, so they had been left alone while they put everything they had been able to scavenge back into the car.

Carol knew Rick was mad at her, that he probably was blaming her for the death of Anne and the disappearance of Sam; but even if she did feel guilty, she was also convinced she had been right. Nothing could assure them that staying for two hours in that house would have meant they would have been safe and sound, nothing.

Rick stood behind her as she put her bag into the trunk of the small car, patting her hands on her pants when she finished. Without looking at him, expecting him to close the trunk and get on driver’s side, she moved towards the passenger door.

She frowned when the door didn’t open the first time she pulled at the handle. The second time was done with a little more strength, since the poor car had gone through hell and back already and could just started being tricky; the third time she did it, she knew what was going on.

“They might have lived.” Rick said to her as the answer to the unasked question when she looked at him. “Karen and David, they might have lived and now they’re dead.” He had taken a few steps towards her and Carol stood her ground.

Carol couldn’t help but shake her head and chuckle. “You keep telling yourself that, Rick.” There was no mirth in her voice, even if she was chuckling every now and then.

“It wasn’t your decision to make.”

“Then whose was it? Yours?” Carol took a step closer to Rick, her voice hard as she looked at him. “No one else from the council was there, I was there, it was my call.”

It was like he had not heard a word of what she had said, he kept on advancing on her and Carol finally took a step back. “When Tyreese finds out, he’ll kill you. He damned near killed me over nothing.”

“You did more damage to Tyreese than he did you, Rick.” Carol could feel the dread trying to take over her head, and she tried to keep it down. She tried to take a deep breath even if she felt like there was something keeping her lungs from expanding, her hands had started to shake she realized then.

Rick shook his head. “When the others find out what you did, no one will want you there.”

“Are you even listening to yourself? Do you have any idea of what is going on in that prison nowadays? Or are you so concerned about your vegetables and your pigs that you don’t realize what’s happening under your own nose?”

“Do you think that maybe having Daryl on your side would keep the rest of them from hating you? From wanting you gone?” Rick sneered at her, taking a step closer to her when she took a step back. “And if they don’t come back, if everybody dies because of this flu? I won’t have you there, not close to my children.”

“Are you so delusional you think you wanting me gone will keep me gone? Why do you think I would listen to you?! You chose to step down, you chose to step away from making the hard choices.” Carol was almost yelling at that point, taking the ground she had lost by backing away from him a little by little until they were almost face to face. “You have no power over me, Rick, and you can’t keep me away from my family!””

“Your family is dead, Carol.” The words froze her in her place. “Sophia is gone, and you can’t even say her name out loud; and you want me to have you close to my children? When you don’t even care about what happened to yours?”

Tears started falling down Carol’s cheeks, as her breathing started getting more labored. “You have no right!” Even she was surprised when her hand shot out and slapped Rick, the force of her blow making him stumble back a couple of steps.

Her breath caught in her throat as the look of utter hatred appeared on who she had once thought was her friend. He sneered at her, as he slowly pulled his Python from his holster cocking it as he pointed it right at her forehead. “I won’t have you back in the prison, I will leave your bag here, you have enough in it to get you through a couple of days.”

Carol couldn’t take her eyes from the pistol trained at her. Her heart was beating a mile a minute, her breathing labored and her whole body shaking. “Rick,” she whispered as she looked from the gun to his face, her hands up showing him that she was unarmed.

Rick took a couple of steps back, enough to be able to grab her bag from the trunk and throw it to the grass beside her feet. He never took his eyes from her. “I’m going to leave this place, and you won’t follow me.”

Carol couldn’t put two words together, the idea of her friend, who once had been their leader was going as far as pointing a gun at her face had rendered her speechless. There were just no words that she could think, she wasn’t even sure she was comprehending the whole situation.

“I’m going to tell Maggie and Andrea what you’ve done…” Carol’s face turned into a grimace as a sob tore through her chest, “and they will know that the orders will be to shoot you on sight.”

Her body couldn’t take it anymore. As soon as those last words left Rick’s mouth she crumbled into a heap, as ugly sobs tore through her chest.

She was still crying when Rick drove away, leaving her behind.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *peaks out from behind a barricade* good chapter... wasn't it? 
> 
> Please come and yell at me over at [ Tumblr ](http://geektaire.tumblr.com) I'm always happy to hear from you... 
> 
> I love you.... I really do.


	5. Internment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Better late than never... right guys?
> 
> Ok, sorry... this was a wonky week. It's a long one, and I hope to be back on my regular schedule next Tuesday. 
> 
> Thanks to Alannastara and Memoriesinatrunk for all of their help with this chapter. you guys rock.

**Chapter V**

**Internment**

 

It had been over twenty-four hours and Daryl wasn’t back yet. It had been over twenty-four hours since they had left and not only had Daryl and his group not returned, but now Carol and Rick had gone to find some medications, and they had yet to return.

They had lost three people already; he had taken the task on himself of trying to keep Hershel from the hardest part, of taking the bodies out in the back and setting them on fire. He had been doing his best, alongside Glenn and Sasha, to help those in need. But things were not looking good, not at all.

Both Glenn and Sasha looked ready to drop. He felt bad for a moment, since Murphy was not looking as bad and he practically had him not doing anything. But both, Sasha and Glenn were being stubborn asses; he had told them more than once to get their asses back into their cells and get some damned rest. But they would not listen to logic, nor him, nor Hershel.

“I didn’t know you that well, good lad,” Connor whispered to the body of Peter, part of one of the last groups that had arrived to the prison. “But something tells me, Saint Matthew’s words might have brought you some respite.”

“Come to me, all you who labour and are overburdened and I will give you rest.” Connor said, his voice softly as he started to get the body ready to burn. “Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart and you will find rest for yourselves.” He did the sign of the cross over the man’s head as he pierced the back of his head with his blade. “For my yoke is easy and my burden light.”

“This is the word of the Lord.” The last sentence was muttered as he brought his lighter to the man’s clothes, walking away as he watched it catch on fire. He bowed his head as he stood there, between the remains of the two others that he had already burnt, and the one man currently burning.

His eyes getting lost in the flames, trying not to think how he had been doing the same thing not thirty-six hours before. How he was missing Carol’s small hand in his as both mourned for those that they had needed to lay to rest.

With a sigh, Connor turned to head back inside. He pulled the mask he was wearing down since he was doing it mostly to keep the smell out of his nose rather than to keep himself from getting whatever the hell this thing was.

He heard the coughing as soon as he reentered the pavilion. The coughing had progressively gotten less and less, since more and more of the people in there were getting sicker and sicker. Some of them, like Mr. Doublemeyer were in fact getting better. The devil did look after his own it seemed.

Movement on the catwalk made Connor look up, only for him to start getting mad once again, seeing Murphy’s back as he looked into one of the cells. “What the fuck did I tell you, Murphy Malachy!” Connor said, his voice low as he took two steps at a time, climbing up the stairs.

Murphy looked at him quickly, before making a hand motion for him to hurry and join them. Connor noticed how pale and sweaty his brother was looking, putting a hand on his waist as if to stabilize him once he got to his side.

“Henry, calm down, we’re trying to help you.” Connor watched as Sasha and Glenn tried to keep Henry from moving too much while Hershel tried to intubate him.

“Hey, lad, let me,” Connor said, as he pushed Glenn back softly, taking his place as he did so. He dropped to his knees, putting one hand on each of Henry’s shoulders applying all of his weight into him. Henry looked at him, panicked, but Connor tried to be as gentle as he could.

Sasha took hold of one of his hands, while he pinned the other one with his knee. Glenn wormed his way in so he could keep Henry’s neck extended enough to make it easier for Hershel to put in the tube. Henry stopped thrashing once Hershel started pumping air into his lungs using the bag, his lungs expanding with every push of the bag.

There was a feeling of uneasiness around all of them after that. Connor looked first at Hershel, then at each of the other three. Sasha and Glenn were white as ghosts; they were sweating with big bags under their eyes. A combination of the sickness, as well as their lack of rest, was probably the reason why they were looking far worse than Murphy was.

Murphy meanwhile was also pale and sweaty, but he looked stronger than the other two; or maybe it was just his wishful thinking.

Hershel continued to squeeze the bag that was making it possible for Henry to stay alive, while Henry himself was barely able to open his eyes. There was blood coming from his mouth, and Connor couldn’t figure out if it was because he had already been bleeding or if it was from Hershel’s procedure.

Glenn and Sasha were still panting trying to catch their breath around him, and for a moment Connor felt anger towards Hershel. He understood the need to try and save everyone, but it was just wishful thinking on Hershel’s part to think Henry could be saved. They had no way to keep that man alive, but he wasn’t about to say that in front of his friends who were also sick, in front of Murphy.

Sasha and Glenn had started to cough, since their lungs had been trying to get as much air in as possible. He softly pounded on the back of Glenn’s back, as if that would help to get whatever it was in his lungs out more easily.

“You two go drink some of that tea, now!” Hershel met Connor’s eyes over Henry’s body. Connor could see the fear in the older man’s gaze, and he nodded to him softly. He was trying to convey to Hershel that he was there, and that he was not going anywhere.

Connor sat back until his back was to the cot, and he patted Glenn’s foot softly where he was sitting on the cot above him.

“Some council meeting, huh?” Hershel looked first at Glenn and then at Sasha as the two of them took a sip of their tea.

“We’re two members’ short.”

“Well, we could all just say that we mistook Murphy there for Daryl,” Hershel said nodding when he saw Glenn pass some of the tea to Murphy, who was leaning his side against the cell’s door while occasionally coughing.

“And I don’t think Carol would mind me taking her place.”

“She will kick your ass out of bed though.” They all laughed as Connor blushed slightly, mock glaring at his brother.

“You just want her all for yourself.”

“I’m a triplet, I’ve been having to share absolutely everything with your ass since we were in the fucking womb.”

“And before you say something that I will be entitled to tell Carol about- “ Hershel interrupted Connor when he was about to answer back at Murphy, “I think we should make some decisions before the rest of them come back.”

“Before Carol comes and kick their asses,” Sasha said, stopping to couch before trying to smile at them, “for talking about her like that.”

“I hereby declare, we’ll have spaghetti Tuesdays,” Hershel looked at Glenn, then a Sasha, “every Wednesday.” Sasha gave him a look, “but first we would need to find some spaghetti.”

“You’re such an old fart, Hershel.” Murphy said fondness in his voice before he turned to cough into the crook of his elbow.

The only noise heard was Murphy’s coughs as the four people inside the room avoided each other’s eyes. The situation was fraught; if help didn’t arrive in the next few hours, who knew how long would they have left? Who knew if there would be any of them left by the time they did, if they did?

“You okay to take over?” Hershel asked Sasha, knowing that she was the one with the better knowledge of what to do in those cases. Sasha nodded, dragging herself closer and putting her hands around the bag as soon as Hershel let go of it.

“If you start to feel lightheaded, you call out for someone. We’ll do this in shifts.” Hershel used the wall and Connor’s hand as help to stand up, moving to take his bag with him.

“You going to help me do the rounds?” Connor didn’t know if the question was for him, or for Glenn, but he started to move to get up as well.

“Sasha?” Connor said softly, putting a hand on her shoulder giving her a small smile as she looked up at him. “I trust my brother with my life, and I know you feel the same about Ty. They’ll come back to us, and they’ll come back with the meds you need.”

Sasha just nodded, her attention back to the man in the floor in front of her. Squeeze, count to six, squeeze; repeat.

“How long will that keep him alive?” Glenn asked Hershel, as Connor moved past them towards where Murphy was standing outside of his cell leaning against the banister.

“As long as we’re willing.” Connor closed his eyes as he finally got to Murphy. He would let Glenn help Hershel for a few patients while he got Murphy settled once again, after that, he would send Glenn’s ass into bed even if he had to tie him into it. He was not losing any of his friends to this thing, not if he could help it.

“It’s inevitable, isn’t it?” Murphy said as he looked at Connor, giving him a half smile as he chuckled. “We’re all heading towards the same place Henry is.”

“Shut up,” Connor sneered as he put a hand over the back of Murphy’s neck, shaking him a little in anger. “You shut up, and you get your ass into that bed, and we wait for Declan to get his ass here and get you your fucking medicine.”

“You’re thinking the same thing I am, Con.” Murphy allowed Connor to start pushing him inside the cell. “You’re thinking that there’s no use to doing that to Henry, to keeping him suffering for longer since we know that if he’s at that stage, he’s not going to get better now.”

“We don’t know a thing, and if you are thinking for a second that I would not spend the rest of my life squeezing a bag every six seconds if that means I keep you alive, you are fucking dead wrong.”

“I love you too, Connor.”

“Shut the fuck up and go to sleep.” Murphy was still smiling, his eyes closed when Connor left him there. He stopped right outside the cell, rubbing his face as he tried to get himself to wake up a little bit more. He was dead tired, he had barely gotten any sleep in the last day, and he was exhausted.

“Not here.” He heard Hershel’s words coming from one of the cells in the lower level, sighing as he started climbing down the stairs, glaring at the floor as he slipped the last couple of ones because a slight miscalculation.

“What are we going to do…” Connor arrived as Glenn was getting in Hershel’s space, his voice still barely above a whisper but anger clear in it. “when in a few hours, when Henry is dead, we have to carry him from up there, across the block and towards the back?”

“We’ll work it out when we have to, lad,” Connor said softly as he rested his hands on the gurney, his body balanced forward so he didn’t have to raise his voice much.

“What happens if the next one is me?” Connor closed his eyes, hanging his head as he heard the fear in his friend’s voice.

“It won’t be,” Hershel said, his voice full of determination. “So, help me get him on this gurney, so Connor can take him out.”

“Hershel, we got this, go look at the others.” Connor said, moving aside to let the old man pass. Hershel looked from Glenn to him, before grabbing his bag and leaving the two of them alone with the body.

Connor moved inside as soon as Hershel was out of the way, pushing Glenn softly towards the feet so he would carry the grunt of the weight. At his nod, the two of them groaned as they pulled on the dead man’s weight long enough to be able to drop him over the gurney.

“Glenn,” Connor said, stopping him as he was about to push the gurney out. “After you help me, you are going to go to bed and get some fucking rest.”

“I can help.”

“I know, but Maggie needs you to be okay, we need you to be okay, so go get some sleep, or God help me I will go sit on you until you pass out.” Glenn chuckled a little bit, wincing when it turned into coughing soon after. Connor just patted his back as he moved to the front so he could start pulling it out.

“Where are you going?” Connor closed his eyes, grimacing before opening only one eye to see Lizzie standing there, behind Glenn looking at the two of them.

“Hey sweetheart.” Connor moved towards Lizzie, giving Glenn a look telling him to wait for him as he passed him. “What are you doing out of bed? You should be resting.”

“Is he dead?” There it was again, that glint in her eyes that made Connor really uncomfortable.

“Come here, darling,” Connor said as he opened his arm, pulling her close to him once she was close enough. “He is, he got very sick and he passed away.”

“But he’s coming back?” There was something joyful in her words, and it just reminded Connor that he really needed to tell someone else about this.

“No, he isn’t.” Connor saw Hershel move out of one of the cells at the end of the block, and signaled him to get closer. “Hershel is going to tuck you in, and he’s going to get you some more of that tea of his… that okay?”

“But I want to stay with you.”

“But I need to help Glenn, can you please do this for me, darling?” Connor tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear, as he looked into her eyes. She was slightly pale, but she definitely looked a lot better than the adults did.

“But Connor…”

“Please Lizzie.” She reluctantly nodded, letting Hershel pull her closer to him and towards one of the free rooms. Connor watched her go, giving her a smile as she looked back before disappearing inside the cell.

“This is such a fucking mess,” he muttered to Glenn as he moved back to his job at hand. “Such a fucking mess.”

“You’re telling me, man,” Glenn said as he panted a little because of the effort that it was taking him to push the gurney.

“You are going back to bed this instant, and don’t even dare to not listen to me.”

Glenn just raised his hands in mock surrender, smirking when Connor grunted as he had to double his efforts to push on his own. He was still standing there when Connor finally got the gurney around the corner and out of sight.

“It’s just you and I, old man, just you and I.”

It took less time every time he did it. He didn’t know if it was because he was getting the hang of it, or if it was because it was getting easier but it was. Connor sighed as he pulled the mask down, turning and leaving the body still burning as he made his way back inside.

“I think I told you what would happen if you were still out of bed by the time I got back.”

Glenn glared at him, shushing him as he motioned him to get closer. Connor frowned as he moved to rest his back next to Glenn, looking at him in concern.

“Maggie wanted to talk to me, she’s out there with Hershel.”

“Why are you here then?”

“I don’t want her to worry.” Glenn was not looking at him, finding his hands a lot more interesting than him at the moment.

“She loves you Glenn, she’s going to worry anyway.” Glenn shook his head, looking pained as he stopped and rested it against the wall for a moment. At his concerned look he just muttered “dizzy.”

Connor sighed, moving across Glenn, evading his hands as he moved down the corridor to where he could hear Hershel and Maggie talking.

“Daddy, you look tired.” Connor couldn’t help but smile as he saw father and daughter talking. He was sure they all looked like shit; it had been shitty couple of days.

“I am, but Connor is making me take enough breaks, he keeps threatening all of us with sitting on us if we don’t.”

“And don’t doubt that I will if you don’t listen, old man.” Connor gave Maggie a sad smile as her eyes met hers, as he approached the two of them.

“I don’t doubt it, you menace.” Hershel’s voice was full of affection, before he turned his attention again to Maggie. “It’s hard in here, but we’re holding it together. They should be back any minute now.”

“Is Carol back yet?” Connor asked, his voice hopeful as he reached the glass that separated them from the outside. Maggie sighed, shaking her head, and Connor felt dread fill his already aching heart. Something had happened, he was sure of it.

Hershel patted him on the back, not looking away from Maggie. “We’re going to make it; don’t you believe that?” Maggie nodded, tears in her eyes. “Just hold on a little while longer, okay?”

Connor moved away as he left the two of them to continue their talk in peace. He needed to see his brother, he needed to check on Sasha, and he needed to pray to God to keep his family safe and sound. Him and Murphy were doing their best in there, he just hoped Carol and Daryl were doing the same wherever they were.

.-.-.-.- 

She had no idea how long she had stayed there, how long she had laid on her knees sobbing after Rick drove away from her, leaving her behind.

She cried for what had just happened, she cried for the friendship that had just been destroyed, for the family that had crumbled into ruins in front of her; she cried for sweet, innocent Anne that had died because she hadn’t been strong enough, she cried for naïve Sam, who reminded her of both Murphy and Zach, a little bit, with his easy smile at a time of peril; she cried because she was stranded miles away from home, not knowing if her boys were alive or dead, and not knowing if she was ever going to be able to find out.

Either her crying, or the sound of their fighting had called a few walkers over. Their shuffling feet and hungry moans finally got her attention, making her stand up on shaky feet, with blurry eyes.

“I can do this,” Carol muttered to herself as she checked to see that she still had the gun that the boys made her carry all the time, as well as her trusty knife in her belt. There were only three walkers, she noticed as she checked around for more, so she used only her knife, keeping noise to a minimum.

She waited until the one closest to her tripped over her bag before she slammed her knife down on his skull, raising quickly just in time to deflect the next one as it threw itself at her. She drove her knife into the second one, letting it fall and freeing her knife as she turned to the third. This one was less decayed than the other two, which meant that it moved better.

It had been a man before the turn, burly and big. Probably as big as Tyreese at one time. His abdomen was empty of its contents, and he was missing one of his arms. Using that as an advantage, Carol sidestepped him to the side where he was unable to grab her, using his own weight to make him fall, before slamming her knife upwards in the back of its neck.

She was panting once she was done with the three of them. The bodies littered the front yard of the house they had waited for Sam at, one of them lying partially over her bag, over the bag that was supposed to get her through the next couple of days.

Grunting, she pushed the walker’s body away from the bag, cringing when she saw that it’s blood had started to soak into it. “Fucking great.”

She chuckled at that, she was muttering to herself, and what was worse, she was muttering curses at herself. Daryl and Murphy would be so proud of her.

She put the bag over her shoulder, turning to look at the position of the sun. Nightfall would be in a couple of hours, so she had a couple of options. She could try and find a car, see if she could make it to the prison and pray that Rick was bluffing; or pray that someone who would not shoot her was on watch. Or, she could try and wait it out, knowing that her boys would come looking for her as soon as they found out.

If they find out.

Carol felt tears threatening trying to take over once again, but she sniffled and started moving inside the house. She needed to prepare for the night, she was not going to spend all her time crying and waiting for her boys to get to her. She would let Rick have his way, and then she would get back and if he didn’t want her there, good. She would take her things and leave, but not like this, not without at least saying goodbye to her girls. And she hoped, although she was almost sure, that she would not be leaving alone.

-.-.-.

Andrea and Maggie had been trying to disperse the walkers at the fence for close to half an hour now. Andrea had let her know, as soon as she had finished talking with her father, that they were getting swamped again, and that if they didn’t do something, the fence was going to come down. If that happened, she had no idea what the two of them alone would be able to accomplish.

“Come on!” Maggie grunted as she slammed the pole into a walker’s eye, just to have another take its place.

Maggie looked longingly at the prison from her place at the fence. It had been four hours since Rick and Carol had left, and a little over 24 since Daryl and his group had done the same. Andrea and her, the only two ‘grown ups’ that were still standing, were doing the best they could. But it was too much.

Between having to get fresh boiled water through to her father and Connor, trying to scrape together enough food for both the sick and the children, as well as trying to keep up with the number of walkers that were hovering around the fences… she truly had no idea how Carol was able to make everything seem so easy. Andrea traded her, water duty for fence duty.

She looked at Andrea, watching as she killed yet another walker, moving to the next without saying a word. It had taken a long time for them to be able to trust her completely again. At least it had taken a long time for Maggie to be able to trust her. Still to this day, they barely talked to each other.

“Do you hear that?” Andrea asked, as she stood on her tiptoes to try and see over the walkers pushing against the fence, Maggie did the same thing, taking off running when she saw the first glance of the green car. Rick and Carol were back.

Maggie hurried towards the door, pushing the first fence open part of the way, knowing that Andrea was close behind, before practically jumping and hanging off the rope that opened the mechanism for the outer gates to open. The car drove right in, as Andrea opened the fence the rest of the way.

The world started to swirl around her as she stood frozen on the ground, looking at the back of the car. The car that only had Rick on the front seat.

“Maggie!” Andrea’s yell made her react, pulling at the other rope closing the gates. She was still in shock as Andrea closed the fence, jogging to her side quickly.

“Was Rick alone?” Andrea’s voice was barely above a whisper. There was no way something had happened to Carol; it was just not possible. The thought was unimaginable. 

Rick threw open the door, getting out of the car and immediately moving towards them. “Carl, Judith, are they alright?”

“Yes!” Andrea said, as they finally reached each other. “Where’s Carol?”

“Sasha, Glenn, Hershel?”

“It’s bad, but they’re fighting. Connor hasn’t gotten sick either so he’s helping my dad; Daryl’s not back yet-“ Maggie frowned when Rick turned on his back and started to make his way back to the car. “Rick! Rick! Where’s Carol?”

Both women started to follow Rick as he walked away from them, stopping when he did, watching as he slowly turned towards them. “It was her.”

“What?” Andrea said. Frowning, she took a step back as Rick took another one closer to them.

“She killed Karen and David.”

Maggie was lost. She could hear Andrea at her side, as she moved even further away from Rick; but she couldn’t think. She didn’t know what to think.

“She said she had killed them because they were a threat.” Maggie shook her head, frowning as she heard Rick’s words. “She killed them in their sleep, because they were a threat against the ones she loves.”

“She killed them in cold blood.”

“Rick,” Andrea said as she took a step closer. “What did you do?”

“I told her to stay away,” Rick answered. 

Maggie shook her head, as if trying to get rid of the cobwebs that were not letting her think straight. 

“I told her she could not come back here, and that I would tell anyone that is on watch what she’s done and that she’s considered a threat against all of us.”

“Are you even hearing yourself, Rick? This is Carol we’re talking about!” Andrea said as she took yet another step closer to them.

“We don’t know her anymore, she’s changed.” Rick said sneering, his right hand dropping to his side to rest over his gun. “She’s not to come into the prison, and if she tries to force herself in she knows you all have permission to shoot on sight.”

“Rick,” Maggie whispered, shocked.

“No! You have no idea what she’s done. She burned them! They were dead and burning when we found them! Do you want that to be Glenn? Or maybe Carl if he ends up sick too?”

Maggie had no words; she shook her head sharply. Rick glanced first at her, and then at Andrea, nodding to them both before he turned to go back to the car.

“I’ll tell your dad, don’t tell anyone else yet.”

“Rick!” Andrea said as Rick had started to get back into the car. “You should tell Hershel not to tell Connor and Murphy.” Rick closed his eyes at the mention of the Irishmen’s names, but nodded sharply to let them know he understood.

“Did she say she did it?” Maggie said just before Rick got into the car, taking a step closer hope in her stance, hoping that this was just a misunderstanding.

Rick nodded, looking at the two women in front of him once again. “Would you have let her come back?”

Both stood in silence as they watched him drive away.

-.-.-.

“Do you want to me to pray another rosary for you?” Connor asked the unconscious form of Henry as he pressed on the bag, watching as his chest rose and fell with it.

“We’ve already done it twice.” Another breath. “It’s okay too if you want to rest, no one will be mad with you.” Press. “Hershel might be a little sad, but you’ve been a champ, you’ve been able to hang in here longer than I expected.”

Connor looked up when he heard Hershel’s steps, nodding to the vet as he looked into the cell. “Glenn?”

“Finally getting some sleep, I reckon.” Press. “He’s in Murphy’s room, top bunk.”

Hershel nodded, sighing before heading off.

“You and me lad, you and me until you’re ready to go.”

He was halfway through another rosary when he looked up to see Murphy watching him from the door. Connor just sighed, shaking his head as he continued to keep Henry alive.

“I’m feeling better.” Connor didn’t answer. He was pissed at his brother, and he was mad at himself; he was tired, and hungry, and he just wanted to be back in his bed with his family around him. He wanted Carol, and Daryl.

“I really am.” Murphy moved to kneel next to his brother, putting his hand on Connor’s shoulder softly. “I’m not coughing as much, and I’m almost sure my fever broke. I’m sweating like a pig.”

“Murph.” There was so much pain in Connor’s voice that Murphy couldn’t do anything but drape himself over his older brother, being careful to allow him to keep on supplying Henry with air to breathe. He tucked his head into Connor’s neck, sighing in contentment at the closeness they had.

“You don’t feel hot anymore,” Connor murmured, turning his head so he could drop a kiss on top of Murphy’s head.

“Told ya.”

Connor had no idea how long they sat like that, silent as they watched Henry’s life start to leave him a little by little with each minute that it passed. The sudden sound of someone dropping downstairs made the two of them jump.

“Go,” Murphy told Connor as he put his hands over his on the bag. “I’m doing better, but not yet there. Go help Hershel.”

“You sure?”

“Go.” Connor smiled at Murphy, rubbing his hair as he left him back there. His brother was going to be okay, he was sure of that now.

Connor got to Hershel just as the older man hesitated to plunge the knife into the skull of his patient. “Don’t worry, old man,” Connor said, startling the older man enough to make him jump. “I can take care of this from here.”

“Henry?”

“Don’t worry, Murph is with him.” Hershel raised his eyebrows at his answer. “His fever broke; he’s feeling better.”

Connor pushed the gurney away from him, towards the other hallway, the one that would lead him to the back. How many more would die before his brother was able to get here? He sent a prayer for him to hurry the fuck up, as he grunted pushing the metal door open with the gurney. 

-.-.-.

“Hershel?”

Hershel jumped, startled for the second time in less than a minute, using the hand that didn’t have a knife to wipe the tears that had fallen down his cheeks.

“He’s the fifth one we’ve lost.” Hershel suddenly felt all the anger, everything he had been trying to keep inside burst. “Connor is the one taking care of them,” he pointed at where Connor had left, “he’s been doing that, taking them and putting them to rest so I don’t have to. We’re burning them behind the block, burning them!”

Rick sighed, using his bandaged hand to rub his forehead.

“It’s what it’s come to.”

“Are you okay?” Rick asked, his voice rough, his eyes unfocused.

Hershel was giving his back to him, still looking at where Connor had disappeared with his patient. “I talked to him yesterday, we talk about Steinberg.” He sighed again as he turned to Rick. “He told me a quote. ‘A sad soul can kill faster than a germ’. That boy.” His voice broke as he pointed again towards where Connor had left. “He’s been keeping me afloat. He’s been doing all that, keeping them from coming back so I don’t have to. So I don’t have to see it, so they don’t have to see it.”

“They’re not seeing it, Hershel,” Rick said as he pointed at him. “They’re seeing you, and him, not giving up, but fighting for them.”

“I don’t know how much longer we can fight,” Hershel said, looking defeated. “Some of them are getting better, but most of them are not.”

“We just keep fighting.” Hershel nodded at Rick’s words, looking at the man in front of him. Night had fallen by then, and the darkness surrounding Rick was more marked than before. There was something nagging him in the back of the head, at the way Rick was looking at him, but he couldn’t think about it right then. He couldn’t think about it.

“When we get through this, it’s not going to be how it was, is it?” 

Hershel shook his head as soon as he heard Rick’s words. There was no going back, the loss, the horrors of having to put down people they knew, people that in a few cases weren’t breathing but their pulse was still there. Nothing would ever be the same again.

“No.” Hershel watched as if the word, as if the fact that he had dared to voice what he was thinking, broke any hope Rick had. Rick sighed, pacing slowly from side to side in the small room. 

“Did I make a mistake? Was I living in denial?” Rick asked. 

Hershel could see as his friend was unraveling before his eyes, and he didn’t know what to do.

“You got a break, you deserved it. We got lucky, we all did,” Hershel said, pausing. “I still believe there’s a plan, I still believe there’s a reason for all this,” Hershel said. 

Rick shook his head, running his hands through his hair pulling at it. “Do you think this is a test?”

“Life has always been a test, Rick.”

Hershel watched as Rick moved closer to the glass, resting his hands on his knees as he let out a big breath, before he raised his face to look at him. “I need to talk to you about Carol.”

Hershel’s heart constricted at the words uttered by their former leader, his eyes immediately going towards where he knew Connor was, before looking towards where he knew the rest of them, including Murphy, were. “Is she dead?”

“She killed Karen and David.”

Hershel sighed, resting his hands against the glass, letting his head drop as he tried to take a deep breath. The whole situation was beyond anything he would have ever imagined. There they were, in the middle of the end of days, with the added hardship of a flu epidemic spreading among their ranks.

“What did you do, Rick?” Hershel raised his head to look at the former deputy. When Rick didn’t answer Hershel moved to stand up straight, “Did you kill her?”

“What?!” Rick cried out as he took a step back, looking at Hershel as if he had slapped him. “Of course I didn’t, why would you even say that?”

“Where is she then? We both know she left her little girl, as well as those two boys that she seems so fond of, in here. She would have been here as soon as she was able to.” Hershel was glaring at Rick by then. “Where is she?”

“Did you not hear what I just said? She killed two people in cold blood! Two of our own!”

“You will lower your voice, right this second.” Hershel watched as Rick raised his hands, nodding and taking a deep breath. “And I know perfectly well what I said, but I didn’t know! None of us did!”

“You didn’t know what? That it was her?”

“That they were dying, Rick.” Hershel’s voice was barely above a whisper by then, “we left them there, on their own, no medical attention, no medication. They were drowning without any respite.”

“You don’t know that,” Rick sneered as he took a step closer to the glass, the glass fogging with his breath, “you can’t know that.”

“What I do know, is that we have had five people die already.” Hershel’s eyes never left Rick’s. “Five people with many more soon to follow, people that I have cared for, people that have had the meager medications we were able to give them.”

“Karen and David?” Hershel shook his head, scoffing, “they were dead the moment me and Caleb chose to prioritize the injured over them. Those deaths? Knowing Carol? That was a mercy.”

“I won’t have her here.” Rick’s face was still transformed into something, or someone, unrecognizable. “I won’t have her here, together with my children.”

“That’s not your decision to make Rick.”

Rick scoffed, turning his back onto the glass, his back shaking as he chuckled humorlessly.

“I’m not going to say anything to the boys right now, because there’s so much going on and we can’t afford to have them go on their own to look for her.” Hershel could see how Rick was breathing harshly, and he didn’t care. “But as soon as Daryl arrives here? I’m going to make you tell them what you’ve done, and you will have handle the consequences yourself.”

“I made a decision that no one could have made,” Rick said, his back still turned to Hershel. “She doesn’t care for anyone, she can’t. She turned cold after what happened to Sophia.”

“Oh, Rick.” The change in Hershel’s voice made the younger man turn, frowning. “Are you sure you’re not just projecting what you feel into her, I know for a fact that she might not be talking to you about her little girl, but that woman? She cares more about the people here that you could ever imagine.”

Hershel glared at Rick. “Please tell me Rick, what are the names of the children, all of the children that we have here? How many grandkids did Missus Lopez have before the turn?” Rick’s frown deepened with every question Hershel asked him. “What is Glenn deadly allergic to? In which University was Zach studying before everything happened? What is Judith’s favorite baby food flavor?” 

Hershel’s eyes never left Rick, “Carol knows all those answers; if someone has gone cold, it is definitely not her.”

Rick was still standing there when Hershel turned on his feet and left him behind. He needed to keep Murphy and Connor occupied, if not, Rick would probably not survive the night.

The state of the inside of the cellblock broke Hershel’s heart. The fact that there was less movement, less people coughing, less loud breathing was not a good omen in this case; unlike any other flu, it was hitting the young adults harder. Out of the five dead so far, eight if you counted Patrick, Karen and David; only one had been over the age of forty. Even right now, both the kiddies and the older ones, including Murphy since he was over forty, were showing signs of improvement, while Glenn and Sasha just looked worse and worse with each hour that they passed without medications.

Hershel sighed as he passed one of his patients’ cells, seeing the older woman leaning over, coughing. With a heavy heart, Hershel pushed her cell door closed. Doing the same thing with the next, and the next.

He still had a job to do, and he was going to do it until he couldn’t anymore.

-.-.-.-

“What are you doing?” 

Murphy frowned, looking up from where he had been lost watching Henry’s chest rise and fall as if hypnotized, to Lizzie standing there peering down at him.

“I’m helping Henry breathe.”

Lizzie nodded, moving to sit down on the cot in front of Murphy, looking at the dying man with cold eyes. Murphy coughed a few times, making sure he never lost count of the seconds between breaths.

“I want Carol,” Lizzie said softly, looking out the door and towards the dark night. Night had fallen upon them and Murphy had barely realized.

“I want Carol, too.” Murphy answered, an easy smile on his face. Lizzie smiled back, and Murphy winked at her. He really wanted Carol. He wanted her to just cuddle him into her arms as he slept, to wake up fighting over boob rights with Daryl, watching as Connor made her blush like only he could.

“Are Connor and Carol going to take care of us now that my dad is dead?” Lizzie asked him, swinging her legs where she was sitting. There was something incredibly disturbing for him to see her talk like that, like nothing was happening while they were surrounded by so much death.

“We are all going to take care of you and Mika.” Murphy couldn’t forget the easy smiles and sweetness that was Mika.

“But my dad only asked Connor and Carol. Aren’t they like married?” 

Murphy choked on his own spit, coughing trying to get himself to be able to breathe again, cursing when he lost count and took a couple of seconds too long to press on Henry’s bag.

“They aren’t.”

“Really?” Lizzie asked, frowning.

Murphy wanted her gone. How was he supposed to explain to an eleven-year-old that yes, they were as good as married in his eyes… but so were Carol and himself? As well as her and Daryl? There was no way he would get himself into that mess.

“Are you okay?” Glenn asked, the bags under his eyes really worrying Murphy.

“You should be in bed.”

“So should you.” Glenn said as he dropped himself into the ground next to him.

“Got the go ahead from the big brother. You, on the other hand, look like shit.”

“You aren’t supposed to curse in front of the children.” Glenn said, using his hand to cover his mouth as he started coughing once again.

Murphy just gave him a look. “I don’t give a fuck about that.”

“I’m telling Carol.”

“Please don’t.”

-.-.-.

She would have to stay in the same house where they had found Sam and Anne. After killing those three walkers, she dragged them to the front entrance of the house, using their bodies as a barricade to keep her scent from the other walkers roaming around.

She knew that house was secure, she knew she could properly secure one of the bedrooms on the top floor. It was too late anyway to go somewhere else, to try and find another safe place to sleep for the night. And also, Rick knew where she was, in case he took pity on her situation and told someone where she was.

He was wrong anyway. She may deserve this, he might be right and she might not be a good influence on his children, (not like he was exactly a good influence on them anyway) but he was wrong when he said no one would care. Her boys would.

Carol wiped a lone tear that had fallen down her cheek as she closed the main bedroom door behind her, dropping her bag as she used her small flashlight to try and find some of the tealight candles she had stored in there earlier that day. She wondered how Murphy was doing, it had been more than twenty-four hours since his symptoms started. Was he still alive? Had he coughed himself to death?

Murphy’s death would mean that Connor would leave soon after. She had to stop looking into her bag as a sob tore through her chest, pushing her hands against her mouth as if that would keep the emotions at bay. Her sweet Connor would never be able to live in a world without Murphy, and she understood that. She knew he loved her, just as much as she loved him. But Murphy was his soul mate, Murphy was first in his heart and in his soul. There was no Connor without Murphy.

She tried not to think about their goodbye that morning. How she hadn’t been able to touch him one last time… what if that was the last time she ever got to see him? What if he got sick while trying to help Murphy? What if she never got him to hold her in his arms, to whisper in her ear that he loved her? What if she never got to kiss that spot just under his ear that she knew would make him smile and giggle like a five-year old again?

Carol tried to take a deep breath when her vision started to swirl. She couldn’t pass out. The tears were still streaming down her face but she had to stay calm, she had to ground herself and remind herself of everything she had learned, of everything they had taught her. As well protected as she had left herself, barricading the doors behind her, she still couldn’t give herself the luxury of passing out. She just couldn’t.

She closed her eyes, as she counted her breaths. She tried to picture their faces waiting for her, and she needed to get back to them. She needed to be able to hug Murphy, kiss Connor, and tell Daryl once and again how much she loved him.

Daryl.

She couldn’t think of Daryl just when she was finally starting to breathe normally. She would get herself back to them, she would get her hugs, her kisses, and her love confessions from them all. She was strong enough to make it, and she was not going to let anyone, even less Rick fucking Grimes, tell her who cared and who didn’t care for her.

-.-.-.-.-

Connor felt like he was finally able to breathe once he was back inside the cell block. The stench of death, of burnt flesh was still deep in his nose, on his clothes, everywhere.

“Hershel?” He asked, as he walked further in, the silence starting to get eery. He threw a look at the cell where he had left Murphy, seeing the shadows of whoever was there with him project outside the cell. He was safe, he could breathe a little easier.

“Connor?” Hershel’s voice came out of one of the cells on the lower level, and Connor hurried to join him.

“Jesus Christ.”

“Do not swear the name of the Lord in vain.” Hershel muttered as he pushed the needle into Sasha’s arm, Connor quickly taking the bag from him and raising his arm to help the fluids get into his friend faster by means of gravity.   

Hershel sighed, grabbing Connor’s hand to get up and sit on the cot once he finished placing the line. “She’s just dehydrated. She didn’t have her older brother keeping her well hydrated and in bed.”

Connor smiled a little at Hershel; it wasn’t a mean barb, it was just the truth. As much as the two of them had told Glenn and her more than once to keep it down, to take it easy they refused to listen. “Do you want me to get her on the bed?”

Hershel shook his head, extending his hand to get Connor to give him the bag. “Go check on Glenn for me, please? Keep your promise if you have to.”

Connor nodded, giving Sasha one last look as she laid on the floor, and turned to leave the cell.

“Connor?” Hershel’s voice made him stop, turning to gaze at the tired looking old man. Hershel seemed to be searching for something in his face, in his eyes; and he apparently did find it. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it, old man.” The gesture on his face, a barely there smirk made Hershel think of Daryl for a moment. Weird that even with them being the two that did not look alike, there was still something that reminded him of the fact that this man was just a third of a whole, that his whole world encompassed two other persons. And if he was honest with himself, he knew that wasn’t true. That Connor’s, Daryl’s, and Murphy’s world was not just each other, but Carol as well.

Hershel watched as Connor went up the stairs, praying to God to keep Carol safe wherever she was. For Him to keep her safe for long enough for them to get her back. Only he knew what would happen if she wasn’t.

.--.-.-

He had ended up in the back seat. They had been driving for almost five of those seven hours, taking shifts in the driving to give the others enough time to get some rest. That’s how he had ended up on the back seat as Tyreese and Bob took care of the last two hours of the drive.

Daryl gazed into the clear night sky, looking as trees passed them by, lit only by the full moon in the sky. It would have been a good night to hunt, clear enough to maybe bag a hog or two. Clear enough to be able to see any danger incoming. He would have taken the three of them this time, first time for the four of them to go out on an overnight hunt together.

They would have had fun.

“Pretty night, kinda romantic… thinking of someone?” Daryl glared at Michonne over Zach’s head. The boy was lost to the world, having fallen asleep upright and slowly falling into his side until he had his head on Daryl’s shoulder.

“Shut up.” Michonne’s grin made him make a face at her before turning back to look outside the window again.

“Hey, sure, you can ask about my love life, and as soon as I try to talk about yours you clam up? Not cool.”

Daryl shrugged, stopping when Zach made a noise of discontent at being moved. Daryl sighed when they passed a ‘Welcome to Hill Valley’ sign. He frowned when he saw a light far away in one of the houses, hoping for the poor soul living there to hurry and snuff it out. There were many things more awful than the dead ones nowadays.

“Are we almost there?” Zach’s voice, rough from sleep, made Daryl jerk from the half asleep state he had fallen.

“How old are you, eight?” Daryl scoffed as he pushed Zach away from him, glaring at Michonne as she smiled at him. He was not going to accept it, but he had a soft spot for the kid.

“I’m gonna tell mama Carol you’re being mean to me.” Michonne’s smile grew even bigger at Zach’s teasing words.

“Please don’t.”

-.-.-.-

Connor took the steps two at a time as he made his way towards Henry’s cell. He was walking by Murphy’s cell, not paying attention when his brother suddenly crashed into him.

“Weren’t you with Henry?” Connor said as he grabbed Murphy by the shoulder to keep him from crashing.

“I had to put Lizzie to bed, and had to take a piss.” Connor frowned at Murphy’s hand that had started to pat his cheek. “Glenn’s got it-”

“Murphy!” The two brothers looked at each other before running towards the cell at the end, finding Glenn giving chest CPR to Henry. “I checked for his pulse, couldn’t find one!”

Murphy fell on his knees at Henry’s head, taking over the use of the bag while Glenn continued with the compressions. Connor watched them, watched Glenn closely more than anything.

“Come on,” Glenn muttered as he continued pressing on Henry’s chest, he took a deep breath, getting ready to start compressions again. When he made a noise that chilled Connor to the bones. “Con-“ Glenn half said, half coughed as he started coughing, his lungs rattling with every cough as he felt on his side.

“Connor!” Murphy yelled for his brother, looking between the man’s life he had in his hands, and his friend lying next to him.

Connor said nothing, he just dropped to his knees, turning Glenn to his side. “Go get Hershel, Murph.” He said calmly as he patted Glenn on the back.

“But Henry-“

“Murph, get Hershel.” Murphy didn’t wait any longer, he got on his feet and ran down to get Hershel.

“Sorry Henry,” Connor said softly as he continued to pat Glenn on the back trying to help him breathe a little better. Making sure he was still conscious. “God will have mercy on your soul.”

Glenn was still coughing, when Connor saw as Henry’s hand started to twitch. He moved his hand towards his belt, going for his knife.

The knife he had left at the burning site.

“Fuck!” Connor yelled, watching as Henry started to reanimate right in front of Glenn and him. “Glenn,” Connor shook him, trying to get him to stand up. Glenn was still breathing, but he was in no position to get up.

“Connor…” Connor looked at the open door, only to find Lizzie looking at the three of them with a look of wonder in her face. “Go get Murphy!” Lizzie nodded, running away. There was a lot of noise going on outside the cell and Henry was already on his feet.

“Fuck this shit,” he muttered as he got to his feet, using the fact that the newly reanimated Henry had his mouth shut around the tube and was unable to bite him. He body slammed the walker into the cot, using his weight to keep him down.

“Fuck,” Connor muttered as Henry thrashed under him, using his knees to keep his arms away from him. He really didn’t want to get a scratch on himself. Panicking he looked around looking for something sharp to finish Henry off, at the same time looking at the unmoving form of Glenn on the ground.

“Fuck!” Connor yelled in frustration when Henry almost bucked him over, looking as something appeared on his field of vision. He stretched, groaning as he tried to do so and keep Henry down at the same time. He didn’t look twice at what it was, grabbing it and slamming it into Henry’s eye. Sighing when he finally stopped moving.

He didn’t bask in his glory, jumping off the now truly dead man and getting to Glenn’s side immediately. Glenn’s breathing was labored, but his pulse was still there. His heart was beating fast and he was hot as hell, but he was still alive.

He was going to kill Murphy for taking that long.

A shot rang out.

.--.

“Hershel, we need you-“ Murphy was panting, running down the stairs as Hershel walked his way, when he saw the walker approach the vet from behind. “Watch out!” Murphy yelled before throwing himself to Hershel, pushing him away just as the walker tried to take a bite of him.

“Oh shit!” Murphy yelled as he tried to use his longer arms to keep the walker away from him, her jaws snapping at him to try and take a bite.

“Everyone! Stay in your cells!” Hershel yelled at the rest of the people in the block as he started to try and find something to kill the walker with. Watching as the walker pushed Murphy into the floor, on his back.

Hershel turned on his back, getting back into the cell where he had left Sasha to get his knife, when he heard the gunshot.

“No!” Murphy said, as he got to his feet, watching as the younger woman that had helped him get the walker off of him, Nancy, fell on her knees blood tainting the front of her shirt from where she had gotten shot.

“Murphy!” Hershel said, at the time he threw the knife at the younger man. Murphy caught the knife as it was falling, turning it in his hand only to slam it into the eye of the walker that had just taken a bite out of Mike, the man who had shot Nancy.

Murphy quickly moved and slammed the knife into the walker that was now snacking on Nancy, sighing softly as he looked at the glassy eyes of the blond woman. She had been one of those women he had roped into confusing him and Daryl, she had been a good person.

“Murphy!” Murphy felt like he could breathe a little better, when he heard Connor start to run down the stairs to his side. Just as a few more walkers started to come out of the cells towards the commotion.

“Jesus fucking Christ, what the fuck happened here?”

“Mam would have had your hide for that,” Murphy said, as he coughed a little bit passing the knife to his brother as a walker approached them.

“Hershel!” Connor said as he slammed the knife to the walker’s head, “Go to Henry’s cell, Glenn is not doing so well!”

Connor covered both Hershel and Murphy long enough to get the older man climbing up the stairs, before he returned his attention to the matter at hand. “Lizzie!” Connor yelled, remembering the orders he had given the younger girl, who he hadn’t seen yet. “Where are you?”

He grunted when Murphy, still coughing, used a walker’s momentum to throw it in front of Connor, for him to slam the blade into their skull.

“Lizzie!”

“She’s safe, she’s with me!” Connor didn’t even turn to acknowledge Hershel, knowing that everyone else up in the second floor had been either well enough not to worry, or locked in their own cells. They were safe.

“Go,” Connor told Murphy as he took on another walker. “Go help Hershel with Glenn.”

For once Murphy did as he was told without talking back, moving up the stairs, having to stop every so often to cough but getting by.

“Holy shit,” Connor muttered as he moved to close Sasha’s cell door. She had barely moved, her sleepy eyes looking at him in between her stupor. “You’ll be alright, pretty girl.”

“Everyone inside their cells!” Connor yelled as he started closing the gates, one by one. The scared looks of the sick causing him to try and hurry along. “Come on people!”

A walker threw itself to him as he went to close the door of his cell, slamming him into the stairs before he was able to throw it away. “Motherfucker,” he muttered as he slammed the knife to its brain. There were more than he expected.

“Dad!” He looked as Maggie slammed herself into the door of the block, on the other side from where he was. “Open the door!”

“We’re okay!” Connor said as he pushed a walker inside the cell, closing the gate and keeping it locked inside. When he turned to look at Maggie again, she was gone.

-.-.-.

“Hershel,” Murphy said, putting a hand to the wall to keep himself from falling as a coughing fit caught him. He tried to take a deep breath, but felt his lungs tighten even more as he saw Glenn lying on the floor, Hershel over him.

“We need another blade for the laryngoscope, Caleb has them! Go!” Murphy didn’t need for Hershel to say it twice, he moved as fast as he could towards Dr. S’ cell.

“Doctor S!”

Murphy jumped back when the walker who had once been Caleb made a grab for him. “A knife, a fucking pole, a gun,” Murphy started to mutter as he tried to look for something to kill Caleb with, but there was nothing.

“Lizzie!” Murphy said out loud, as he ran to the other side of the catwalk, to the cell that Lizzie and Luke had been sharing. Luke was huddled in a corner, as Lizzie looked outside by the bars. He didn’t wait and think, Murphy didn’t even ask for it, grabbing the knife from Lizzie’s belt, where it was almost proudly on display, before dashing back towards Doctor S’ cell.  

The walker snarled, and when it tried to make a grab for Murphy, he took his arm, and knifed it in the eye. He stopped moving immediately and with a grunt, Murphy opened the door.

He had no idea what he was looking for, so he grabbed the medical bag, the case that he knew had the shotgun and ran out of the room. They had family to save.

.-.-.-

She in theory knew It wasn’t a bright idea to have a candle lit in the middle of the night, the house wasn’t far from the road and in the darkness, a candle was like a beacon for people to follow. But she couldn’t stand the darkness, not right now.

Carol lay on her side, looking as the flame flickered. She was numb. She was lost. She wanted nothing more than for all this to be a terrible nightmare. She would wake up in the middle of a pile of bodies, warm, not knowing where she stopped and the other began. She would not be alone.

She wiped her cheek as a tear fell, she couldn’t stop crying and it pissed her off. There was nothing to be afraid of, she was going to get on a car first thing tomorrow morning, and she was going to make her way to her boys. To her family.

And if somehow Rick convinced everyone that she was the antichrist? That she was the worst thing that could have ever happen to them? She knew her boys would leave with her, and with them she could take her girls. And Zach.

Carol moved and put out the candle. It was time to sleep, and when she woke up; she would go get her family back.

-.-.-.-

Murphy all but threw the bag to Hershel, watching and moving from one foot to the other as he looked for the piece of equipment to intubate Glenn.

“Your brother used the other one on Henry,” Hershel said, causing Murphy to focus on the dead walker on the cot with the laryngoscopy blade sticking out of his eye.

“Glenn, Daddy?!” Murphy barely got out of the way as Maggie dropped to her knees at Glenn’s head. He looked at the two of them, before looking over the rail to look for Connor.

He watched as he took down another walker, and Murphy started to make his way towards the stairs. There couldn’t be many more left, they hadn’t had that many people in there. Had they?

By the time Murphy reached Connor, his brother was drenched in walkers’ blood. There were at least ten bodies, that Murphy could count right then, littered around them. Connor looked like that he had no idea who was friend and who was foe.

“Connor,” Murphy said softly, raising one of his hands as if to touch him as he approached him slowly, like he was a wild beast.

“Murph?” Connor’s voice sounded lost, and Murphy didn’t care that his brother was dripping with undead blood. He used his hand to pull Connor into his arms, hugging him close. Connor dropped his knife, clenching his fist around the back of Murphy’s shirt.

They were going to be alright.

-.-.-

When his father had come and got him, Carl’s first thought hadn’t been concern for his father’s safety. He had thought the worst had happened, that Murphy had passed away.

He hadn’t, his father had only wanted him to go and help him and Andrea get rid of the walkers. His father was finally giving him respect, he was finally seeing him like the responsible person he was. His father was acting sketchy.

Carl couldn’t help but being proud of the three of them, as they had gotten rid of all those walkers. But he couldn’t help but being even more proud of Daryl and his team. They were back, and they had the medicines that they all needed. Things were going to be alright.

-.-.-.

She could hear the shuffling of the walkers as they walked past the house she was staying in. The main bedroom, where she had barricaded herself in, was the one that overlooked the street and she could hear them moan and drag their feet on the asphalt.

It was the second time she woke up since she had tried to fall asleep. She had no way of knowing how much time had passed, since her only watch was somewhere across the room, where she had thrown it away in a fit of anger earlier that night.

It hadn’t been fair to her, at that moment, that she had something in her possession that reminded her of Ed, of someone that didn’t even deserve a thought from her, and nothing from her boys. The drawing that Daryl had given her, the stupid ‘kiss me I’m Irish’ shirt that Murphy got her from God knows where and that he would love to see her wearing; the necklace that Connor had gotten her for what she knew was Mother’s Day, although he hadn’t said it precisely, with Sophia’s birthstone. She had broken the clasp to it, and Daryl had promised to fix it for her.

All those would have been better than getting stuck with Ed’s watch.

Carol sighed, pushing herself to lie on her back looking at the dark ceiling. She would wait until first light, and then she would go and get her things, her family, and leave the prison forever once and for all.

-.-.-.

Daryl finally understood what people said about how amazing it felt when you got to go home. He hadn’t, until the moment he saw the guard towers from the prison in front of them. There was just a feeling of right, the moment he laid eyes on the prison, that he had never felt before. He was home, he was back. Now, he just hoped his family was alright.

Carl smiled at him through the window as he opened the door for him, and Daryl couldn’t help but smile back. The kid was safe, one less person to worry about.

As soon as Bob stopped the car, Daryl was out.

“Sasha? Is she okay?” Tyreese asked, taking a step towards Rick. Daryl wanted to ask about Murphy so bad, but there were walkers everywhere, some of them were dead, but more were starting to shuffle slowly through the hole in the fence, towards the inner yard.

“Go,” Zach said, as he pushed him lightly on the side, making Daryl look at him, confused. “We got this, go look for your brother.”

Daryl felt lost; he knew he was needed out there, but his heart was telling him to go and make sure Murphy was alright.

“Go!” Zach said, pushing Daryl harder on the back to get him going, before Zach moved towards the bins and picked up a rifle. Daryl threw a look at Michonne, to see her nod at him before he took off running behind Tyreese. 

His heart was beating wildly, the crossbow in his arms feeling like it weighed a ton, instead of the usual seven pounds. 

“Daryl!” 

Daryl’s crossbow hit the ground.

He was so busy launching himself into Murphy’s arms that he didn’t even realize that he had dropped it. Murphy was walking. Murphy was in a good enough state that he was apparently carrying a water bucket, that they almost caused to spill in the commotion. Murphy was alive.

Daryl tried to keep his emotions at bay. He felt his eyes start to burn with unshed tears, and his chest started to heave. His brother was in his arms, and he just couldn’t seem to let go.

He felt Murphy’s hand move to cradle his head to his neck, letting his older (by seconds, probably) brother console him as Daryl let all his worry go. “It’s okay, Daryl,” Murphy said, as he leaned into the one-armed hug. “I’m okay; you’re back.”

It took him a little while to calm himself enough to be able to talk, pushing his brother away as he quickly moved his hands to try and wipe away the tears that had managed to fall down his cheeks. Murphy’s hand quickly moved to rest on the cheek that was identical to his, using his thumb to wipe away the tears. “I’m alright, we’re alright.”

Daryl smiled, nodding before pushing back and jumping up and down a couple of times, as if that would help him keep his emotions in check, as he huffed and puffed a once or twice.

“Good?” Murphy asked him, looking a little pale still, and coughing once in awhile. Daryl nodded to him, before moving to pull his brother’s head closer and dropping a kiss on his forehead.

“Gotta go help everyone with the walker situation outside, everyone doing okay?”

“We will be.” 

Daryl sighed, nodding before turning on his heel and walking back through where he came from. The sooner they got rid of those nasty fuckers, the sooner he could be back in his bed with his woman and his brothers.

He couldn’t wait to get some sleep.

.-.-.-

Murphy was not going to say it to Daryl, since the man looked like he was barely being able to stand, but he was worried for Connor. His brother had probably not gotten any sleep since the whole thing had started, three days before, and after killing all of those walkers? He wasn’t sure he was doing as well as he initially thought.

Murphy got up the stairs, after having passed Sasha and Tyreese at her cell, and used the opportunity to check on Lizzie, as he walked past her to his and Connor’s cell. The girl was finally sleeping, and he truly hoped she stayed that way.

She had asked for her knife back, and he had told her he would get it to her later. Right now he didn’t want to think about the fact that it was still embedded in Caleb’s eye. The man had been a friend after all.

“Hey Con,” Murphy said softly, as he entered their cell. Connor was still in the same place where he had left him, sitting on the ground with his back to the wall. He was looking at his bloody hands, not looking up when Murphy arrived.

Murphy felt his heart break. His brother, his protector, had done the thing that he had always been good at. Protecting him, protecting others. He had done the headcount after he had gently taken Connor back into the cell, and his brother had had to kill at least twelve people that they had known. Twelve people that they had shared bread with, prayers, dreams and nightmares with.

There was a reason why Connor had kind of just checked out. After almost 72 hours without sleep, plus everything he had had gone through while taking care of him, and having to do the dirty work so Hershel didn’t have to?

It was time for someone to take care of Connor for once.

Murphy couldn’t help but think of Carol, wondering where she was. She probably was out there, saving all of their asses. He knew her, and that was the only reason why she wouldn’t have been in there as soon as Maggie had broken through. The whole situation must have been worse than Daryl had made it seem.

“Decks is back, ya know?” Murphy said softly, as he sat himself cross-legged in front of Connor, taking one of his hands in his and starting to clean the walkers’ blood from it. “He’s okay, gave me a bag full of shit that I left outside. I should give it to Hershel, I guess.”

Connor didn’t say anything back, and Murphy was too afraid to look up from his brother’s hand. He continued babbling, about everything and anything, as he moved up Connor’s arm, starting on the other one as soon as he finished with that one.

Murphy gently pulled Connor to stand, grunting at the effort that took to get his brother on his feet. “You’re such a fat ass, Con,” Murphy muttered, as he gently unbuttoned Connor’s shirt, pulling the bloodied garment off him and dropping it, with a look of disdain, on the floor of the cell. Connor’s chest wasn’t as bad as he thought it was going to be, taking only a little effort to get him fully clean.

Then he helped him out of his pants. “I just hope Lizzie doesn’t walk in right now, no one needs to see your pasty white legs, those would definitely give her nightmares.” Murphy swore he saw Connor’s lips twitch, as he pushed his brother to sit on the cot wearing now only his black briefs.

“Oh Con,” Murphy said as he sighed. Connor’s face was splashed with blood, and he softly started cleaning it. “You need to get some rest, get some sleep, sweet brother.”

“Murph?” Connor asked softly, as he finally looked up at Murphy, and Murphy couldn’t help but smile.

“Sleep now, Con, I got this.”

Connor nodded, letting Murphy push him to lie down on the cot. Murphy climbed onto the small cot so they were lying flush against each other. They were alive, they were going to be okay.

-.-.-.

Daryl watched as the sun started to appear above the tops of the trees surrounding the prison. His back was covered in sweat, as him, Michonne, Zach, Bob, Tyreese and Andrea had spent all night making sure the fences would stand.

“Have you told her?” Daryl asked, as Michonne took the feet of the walker that he had been trying to drag, and helped him carry it to the back of the pick-up truck where they had been putting all of the other bodies, to take them away and burn them.

“Have you?” Michonne answered back, grunting as they dropped the dead weight. She couldn’t help but smile at the glare he was giving her, pushing on his shoulder as she walked past him, towards the prison once again. “You should follow your own advice.”

“She knows,” Daryl grumbled as he moved to pick up another body.

“Sometimes, as much as actions do speak for you, words are needed.”

“You should follow your own advice.” Daryl responded, with a smirk.

“Shut up.”

Daryl could still hear her chuckling as she started walking back towards the prison. He was shaking his head as Zach threw the keys to him, getting in and driving off to the drop site. The dashboard said it was a little past 8 am. It had been a long night, after an even longer day.

“Saw your brothers, they were passed out sleeping, dead to the world.” Tyreese said, breaking the silence as they got out of the truck, and Daryl jumped into the bed of the truck to start unloading the dead bodies.

“Good.” Daryl started pushing the bodies off the truck, grimacing at the disgusting sound they made when they hit the ground. “You saw Carol?”

“Nah, man. I only saw them because I was looking for Hershel.” Tyreese looked on as Daryl kept on pushing the bodies from the truck, resting his forearms on the side of the truck. “I think she was with the little girl.”

“Lizzie.” Daryl said as he sighed, having thrown the last body off the truck finally.

Tyreese nodded, as Daryl crouched in the bed of the truck, panting. “That should be the last batch of the ones outside, I guess,” Tyreese said. 

Daryl nodded, wiping his nose with the back of his forearm, as if that would take away the stench of death that was common with the walkers.

“I need a shower.”

Tyreese only chuckled as he moved to the passenger side, while Daryl jumped from the bed of the truck to the driver’s side. The drive back was silent; he tapped the wheel as if doing that would make time go faster. He needed to see Carol, to see Connor, with his own two eyes.

He just needed to see all of them together.

The gates were opened by Bob, and Daryl frowned when he saw Rick and Carl out there in the vegetable patch. Carl waved at them as they passed, but Rick didn’t even acknowledge them. And Daryl tried not to think too much about that; something new must have crawled up Rick’s ass, and he had no time, nor patience, at the moment to deal with it.

Hershel was out in the sun by the time they made it through the inner gate.

“How’s Glenn?” Tyreese asked as soon as they were out of the truck. Daryl had heard the whole thing from him: how Glenn and Sasha were the ones in a worst situation, and how his brother apparently was doing a lot better than them if he was out walking.

“He made it through the night, he’s breathing on his own. Maggie is with him. He seemed stable enough for me to get some air.” Hershel did look a little too pale for Daryl’s taste, but he was definitely not going to say that to the man’s face.

“He’s a tough son of a bitch,” Daryl said as he watched Tyreese trot away, up the stairs and towards his sister.

“Yes,” Hershel said, smirking.

“You’re a tough son of a bitch,” Daryl said playfully to Hershel as he walked past him, towards were Tyreese had disappeared.

“I am.” 

Daryl couldn’t help but chuckle at Hershel’s response. He took a step closer towards the block’s entrance when he stopped, and turned around to look at Hershel.

“How about Carol?” He watched as Hershel stopped and turned to him, “Is she up in ‘A’ block with Lizzie and the boys?”

Daryl saw something pass through Hershel’s face, and dread tried to overtake him. “No, talk to Rick about her.” Suddenly he felt like he couldn’t breathe, and something must have shown in his face since Hershel was quick to respond. “She’s okay, just talk to him about it.”

Hershel hadn’t finished his sentence, and he was already running inside and towards their room. She wasn’t in cell block ‘A; the only other place she could be was in their room.

She better be in their room.

-.-.-

The sound of birds was what woke her up. Carol opened her eyes to see an unknown wallpaper, on an unknown wall, of place that was definitely not hers.

She had woken up late. She had to get her bearings together and get back to her family.

She had to get back to the prison. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all your support guys, your comments are what keep me going with this.


	6. Too Far Gone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was on time!!!! YAY!!!!
> 
> Thanks to my amazing betas Onequarterbritish, Alannastara and Memoriesinatrunk for being patient with me and my AU ramblings. You're awesome guys. 
> 
> Also especial thanks to StaceyecatS, EmpressMcBride,and CatLea for all your support. :)
> 
> Sorry beforehand
> 
> Also, tags have been updated

**Chapter VI**

**Too Far Gone**

 

“You should stay away from the gas; I know it gives you headaches.” Michonne tried to keep the smile off her face when Andrea motioned her to stay back, while she and Hershel grabbed a can of gas each and started to throw it all over the pile of walkers they had just gotten to.

Daryl and Tyreese had spread the piles up, around the prison, and this one was one of the first ones.  

Hershel threw the torch onto the pile and the three of them watched the walkers catch fire. Michonne couldn’t help but look from the fire to Andrea, standing just a few feet away from her. Daryl was right, she should tell her. She would tell her later, today.

Michonne smiled as Andrea turned and caught her eyes, her heart skipping a beat. Andrea motioned with her head, back towards the truck. They still had more bodies to burn. Silently she followed her, like she would follow her everywhere.

She was looking at Andrea, when everything went black.

-.-.-.

“Morning, Asshole.” 

Connor groaned when he opened his eyes; his head was pounding and he felt really warm on one side of his body. He couldn’t help but smile though, since Murphy’s face was suddenly there looking as full of mischief, as usual.

“Shut up,” Connor muttered, as he put a hand over Murphy’s face, pushing him away. Smiling as his brother yelped when he fell on his ass onto the floor.

“I’m not going to kick your ass only because you look like shit.”

“Like you look any better, princess.”

-.-.-.

When Michonne came to, she was sitting in between Andrea and a window at the back of an RV. Her head hurt, and she was disoriented, but she quickly realized her hands were bound in front of her.

“What happened?” She whispered as she searched for Hershel, before looking at Andrea. “Are you alright? Did they hurt you?”

“I’m okay,” Andrea said, smiling softly at her. She tried to raise her hands, touching Michonne’s forehead her hands came away with blood that she showed Michonne. “He only hit you.”

“He knew who was the bigger threat after all.” Hershel muttered from where he was sitting on the floor.

“You okay?” Michonne asked, as she leaned over Andrea to look at Hershel. Andrea used her shoulder to steady her when her dizziness became apparent.

“Do you think I would harm him without reason?” 

Michonne’s expression morphed into that of pure anger.

“I should have never stopped looking for you.”

“Stay still,” the Governor said as he moved to pull something out of his pocket, chuckling when he saw both Andrea and Michonne tense only to show them it was a band aid. Michonne tried to move away, as he pushed into her and pressed the band aid onto her head.

“No one will hurt you while you are here.”

“Somehow I don’t believe that.” Michonne didn’t take her eyes from the man in front of her as Hershel spoke with him. He was dangerous, and she was sure he was there to kill them all.

The governor pulled a pack of sausages from his pocket, throwing them at Andrea’s lap. “You should eat; it’s going to be a long day.”

“You need to send a message to our people, if your intention is to ransom us for something.” Michonne said, moving so she was sitting at the edge of the seat. “And you know how Rick reacts to strangers; if you send one of yours, they’re going to die.”

The governor chuckled, looking sadly at Michonne. “Michonne, I want you to know, Penny, my daughter. She was already dead, I know that now. I don’t want to hurt you; I don’t want to hurt anyone. I want the prison; I have people I need to keep alive.”

“Bullshit.” Michonne was still glaring at the Governor and she didn’t realize at first that it hadn’t been her speaking her thoughts who had said that, but it had come from the woman beside her.

“I know you, Blake,” Andrea said with a sneer. “I know you, and you’re a sociopath, you don’t care about people, you care about power.”

“I need to take that prison, and you three are going to help me take it. No one has to die.” The Governor continued as though Andrea hadn’t said anything.

Michonne chuckled, shaking her head. “I’m going to kill you.”

“No you won’t.”

“I’m going to put my sword through the one good eye I left you with. I should have killed you when I had the chance.”

“Stop.” Hershel’s voice had the power he had intended, making Michonne stop in her tirade. “You want the prison?” Hershel asked Blake, as he looked up at him from where he was still sitting on the floor.

“I do…” 

Michonne was still sneering at the one eyed man; she felt Andrea move to press closer to her side. 

“And I’m planning on taking it as peacefully as I can.”

“Governor-“

“Don’t call me that.” 

Michonne was sure her face couldn’t possibly express more confusion than it did at that moment. From where she was sitting at the edge of the seat, she was able to see Hershel and she just felt the need to grab him by his lapels and try to make him see. There was no way that man was going to do anything peacefully, there was no way that man, the man who killed so many, would be able to coexist with them in peace.

What would they tell Daryl, Connor, and Murphy? Would they go and tell them, yes, live with the man that murdered your older brother? Did he actually think that possible?

“These people that you want to live at the prison, do you love them?”

“Hershel,” Andrea interrupted before Blake could talk, “he’s incapable of love.”

“I do love them!” Blake said, raising his voice as he looked down menacingly at Andrea. Michonne moved on her seat, getting ready to pounce if he made a single move against them. “You are a good man, Hershel.” His tone of voice was back to a moderate one, “better than I am, better than Rick.”

Blake took a step away from them, still looking down at them. “But Rick and I would never be able to live together. Me and Michonne would never be able to live together.”

“If I don’t kill you,” Michonne said, her voice low. “I know for sure there are three men in that prison that will not rest until you are six feet under.”

Blake looked at them, his eye cold and calculating. He shook his head, moving towards the RV’s door. 

“If you’re willing to take the prison as peaceful as possible,” Hershel said, stopping Blake from leaving the vehicle and having him turn to look at them again. “That means you’re ready to hurt whomever is there to get it. My daughters are in there. If you know what it feels like to lose a daughter, why would you cause the same thing to happen to someone else?”

“Because he’s a monster.” Andrea’s eyes never left Blake’s, a promise passing through them.

“My name is Brian, by the way.”

-.-.-

She wasn’t in her cell.

As soon as those words had been uttered from Hershel’s lips, Daryl ran towards cell block C, towards their home. Only to find it empty.

The kids were still up in the admin building, the sick were on cell block A, and everyone capable of doing what needed to be done were outside.

She wasn’t there.

He had refused to accept that, to accept that something had happened to her and she wasn’t in the prison anymore. So he had looked.

He had gone through every single place he could think of, he had gone to the infirmary, the laundry room, her library, Connor’s chapel.

She was still gone.

He had eventually run back to their room, going through their things, trying to find a clue of where she was, what had happened.

What worried him the most, what had him sitting down almost defeated on their bed, was the fact that her necklace was still sitting on what worked as their bedside table. The necklace with the pink sapphire that Connor had gotten her, a pink sapphire for Sophia’s birthstone, was still on it where he had left it.

The clasp had broken three days before; he had told her he would fix it and then had forgotten about it. If she had left on her own accord, she would have never left it behind. She would have never left  _ them _ behind.

He was still sitting on their bed his head down as he watched the forgotten necklace hang between his legs, their combined scents all around him, when he heard footsteps coming up the stairs.

He knew those footsteps, and that person owed him answers. He heard as Rick stopped outside their room, the blanket was thrown over it, and he didn’t dare to enter. He was glad, he would not have him tainting their space, her space.

Daryl stood up, grimacing as he ended up standing directly in front of the mirror Carol had insisted they needed on their room. His eyes were red, and he frowned as he noticed that. He still had the chain of her necklace in his fist, so he put it inside his pocket. He would get it back to her, he would.

“Daryl?” Rick’s voice resounded through the block, and Daryl felt as his anger started to return.

“Where is she, Rick?” Daryl growled, enjoying when he saw Rick take a couple of steps away from the opening of their cell as he suddenly appeared in front of him.

He could see Rick getting ready for a fight, and the need to start pacing was too strong to handle.

“I left her…” Daryl frown got even deeper as he heard those words coming out of Rick’s mouth. “I left her at a settlement we went to scavenge for medications yesterday.”

“You what?” Daryl shook his head as if trying to comprehend what he was hearing, it was something he had never expected to hear, and his brain wasn’t entirely processing her. “You willingly left her there? Alone?”

“She killed Karen and David.”

“Wait, what?” Daryl shook his head, glaring at Rick as he tried to connect what he had just been told. There was just so much, too much going on for him to process at the moment.

“Carol killed Karen and David.”

“I heard that, you asshole,” Daryl growled, starting to pace. “So what?”

“So what? Tyreese would have killed her if he found out.”

“You leave Tyreese to us.” Daryl sneered as he took a step closer to Rick.

“She killed two of our own.” Daryl took a deep breath, the sneer still on his face as he heard Rick talk. “She couldn’t be here, man!” Daryl clenched his jaw as he tried to control the need to punch something, to punch Rick. His vision started getting blurry, but he was not going to allow Rick to see him cry, so he moved a couple of steps away, leaning against the banister.

“They were already dead.” He could feel Rick’s eyes as he looked down at his hands, clenching them open and close. Trying to remember the feel of her small hand in his.

“What?” Rick’s voice was full of incredulity, and Daryl felt the need to bash his head against the wall. Rick’s, not his.

“If she killed them, it was because they were probably already close to dying, or because they begged her to.”

“Are you even listening to yourself? If she killed them? She confessed to me, she did it Daryl, she killed them.”

“You don’t know her.” Daryl said as he looked up from where he had been leaning his forehead against his hands on the banister. “You have no idea of what she’s capable and what she’s not.”

“As if you are. She said she did it, that it was for us.”

“Of course it was for us!” Daryl exploded, taking the few feet between him and Rick in a couple of strides, taking his friend by the lapels of his shirt and slamming him into the wall. “Everything she does, is for us.”

“You don’t know what she’s capable of Daryl, you don’t know her!”

The moment Rick spat out those words, he knew he shouldn’t have. Daryl was still grabbing onto his shirt with his left hand, when the right one slammed into his left cheek. Rick’s vision swarmed as he was pushed into the wall once again before suddenly Daryl moved back.

“You have no fucking idea of who she is, I do.” Daryl was pacing again, his hands shaking.

“Daryl…” Rick said as he took a step closer to Daryl, his hand reaching out to touch him.

“Do not fucking dare.” Daryl had stopped, his back to Rick.

Rick didn’t listen, moving to put a hand on his friend’s shoulder.

Daryl didn’t tell him twice. He just turned and struck Rick on the nose.Rick was still on the ground when Daryl jumped over him and ran down the stairs. He needed to get his brothers, they had somewhere else to be.

.-.-.-.

She got lucky, the first car that she tried, the one right outside of the house she spent the night at? It worked on the first try.

“Fucking finally.”

Carol smiled, chuckling as she shook her head and put the car into drive. Who would have thought, once upon a time Susie homemaker Carol Peletier could swear as the best of them? That happened by spending six months with her boys, she couldn’t wait to see what happened if she spent years with them.

She drove around the roundabout, looking at the house that gave her shelter through one of the worst nights of her life. She hoped she would never have to return to this place. She hoped she could burn it all to the ground.

She pushed the on button on the car’s sound system, driving as the silence was chased away by the music. Her head started to bop along, smiling when she noticed what she was hearing. She had to remember to take the cd before she left the car behind, Murphy would definitely enjoy having Wicked on his musicals collection; on  _ her _ musicals collection if Connor asked.

Carol sighed as she accelerated. She had a couple of hours ahead of her, she wanted to get there before it was too late for them to leave. She was not willing to spend another night between the prison’s walls. That she was completely sure of.   

-.-.-

He practically ran all the way back into cell block A. His hand still hurt, from where he had punched Rick, but his mind was not stopping to think about that.

Rick had done it again. He had yet again used the fact that he wasn’t there to disrupt his whole life. He had been a coward and used the same kind of logic he used when he had left Merle on the rooftop back in Atlanta. He had been judge, jury and executioner all at once, without waiting for someone else to have a say.

Rick had better not cost him Carol, because if he had, he would burn this world to the ground.

His chest felt tight, and he now knew what that meant. He stopped at the entrance of the block. He needed to calm down, he needed to be able to breathe because he would not be of use to Carol if he passed out. He at least had the mind to grab his crossbow before leaving Rick back there.

He wasn’t sure he wouldn’t have killed him if he had tried to touch him again.

Daryl laid his back against the wall of the entrance to the cell block A, dropping his head against the hard concrete as he tried to calm the wheezing in his chest. He closed his eyes, trying to will the tears away as he pictured Carol. He could hear her telling him to calm down, to breathe along with her. His free hand was trembling as he put it over his heart, just as she had done millions of times before. In and out.

It took him a couple of minutes to be able to calm down enough to not feel like he was going to pass out. He finally entered the cellblock.

People were still coughing, but the general vibe  wasn’t of death as it had been before. Light was shining through the windows on the second level, he noted as he took the steps two at a time trying to get there faster.

He passed a few cells, some now empty of the walkers that had had before. Some empty of patients that had moved to other places on the prison. Until he found the one he was looking for.

“Con?” Daryl said softly, as he saw his brother on his knees, head bowed as he touched his hands that were clasping the rosary he had gotten him in one of his runs, to his forehead. The moment Connor heard Daryl’s voice, he jumped in surprise before closing the couple of steps between them and embracing him.

“Con.” Daryl felt his throat threatening to close up again, but they didn’t have time for that. There was something more important to think of right then. They would hug it out later.

“Con!” Daryl said more forcefully, as he pushed Connor back, keeping his free hand on his shoulder.

Daryl’s eyes searched for Murphy, finding him standing close to them, and he nodded as he took a deep breath. He needed to tell them, and he needed to tell them now.

“Carol-“

They had to brace themselves against the side of the cell when the earth shook.

“What the fuck was that?”

“Come on!” Daryl said as he shouldered his crossbow, running out of the room knowing his brothers wouldn’t be far behind. He had a really bad feeling about this.

-.-.-.

They watched from the inside of the truck as the tank fired into the north tower. Michonne’s wrists were raw from trying to loosen the knot on the rope they were using, her shoulders hurting from how hard she was pulling.

She knew this man; she knew there was no way they were going to be able to make it out of there alive if she didn’t do something.

“Andrea!” Michonne whispered yelled at Andrea, who was at her side in between her and Hershel, elbowing her on the side to try and get her to react. Both Hershel and Andrea were in shock, having seen the tank blow up part of their home, with whomever had been in that tower along with it. “Andrea, we need to get out of here!”

Andrea nodded, taking a deep breath before she dropped on her knees in the space between seats and started to try and loosen Michonne’s knot with her teeth. Michonne was breathing fast, her hands were shaking and as she tried to let anger consume her instead of desperation. The knot was too tight.

“I can’t!” Andrea cried, as she finally let the tears that were threatening to fall loose. She moved to rest her face against Michonne’s lap, closing her eyes as she felt her friend’s hands run softly through her hair.

“We can still get out of this, girls,” Hershel said, still looking towards the front, his voice calm amidst their desperation. “He said he didn’t want to hurt anyone.”

Michonne couldn’t do anything but bend so she could rest her forehead against Andrea’s head.

“We’re not giving up,” Michonne whispered only for Andrea. “I’m going to make sure that bastard is dead, and you’re going to get out of here, do you hear me?”

“Rick! Come down here!”

-.-.-

People were running all over the prison, getting into their way as they tried to get out towards the yard. Murphy had to stop more than once, Connor crashing into his back as one of the kids just ran in between them.

“Come on!” Daryl yelled at them, turning to look at them as he pushed the door open, keeping it open for his brothers to run past him.

“What happened?” Rick said as he almost crashed into Daryl when they reached the common area, him coming from where their cells were.

“Got no fucking idea,” Murphy said as he followed Daryl, pushing on his brother’s back when he stopped to let Rick pass before him.

“Let’s go!” Rick barked at them, running ahead, pushing the metal door with enough force that it banged against the wall leaving it wide open for all of them to pass.

They all ran behind Rick, Connor pausing to put an arm around Murphy’s back as he stopped to cough. Murphy wasn’t in mortal peril anymore, but he definitely wasn’t in top shape.

“Get back!” Daryl looked over his shoulder to look at where his brothers were, as he reached the rest of their group where they were hiding behind the base of the tower. Connor motioned him to look forward, as he pushed Murphy forward to join them a moment later.

“Rick! Come down here.”

“Is that a fucking tank?” Connor whispered, as he took a look over Daryl’s shoulder.

Daryl couldn’t say anything; it was a tank. A tank with the fucking Governor standing on top of it. Daryl gave Connor a short nod, glaring at Murphy as his low “Sweet merciful Jesus.”

“We need to talk.”

Murphy moved so he was at Carl’s back. The boy was breathing fast. “It’s okay lad,” Murphy murmured when Carl jumped startled at his presence. Carl closed his eyes, moving back a little bit so his shoulder was touching Murphy; that seemed to help him settle as the two of them watched Rick get closer to the fence.

“That’s not up to me anymore! There’s a council now, they run this place.”

Daryl glared at Rick, before looking quickly at Connor who was now standing right beside him. Nothing good would come out of this if the Governor wanted to speak with Rick only, God knew how the former deputy would react.

And he sure wasn’t thinking that when he left Carol behind. Daryl took a deep breath; he couldn’t be thinking of that right then. There was a fucking tank waiting to decimate them all, if he was honest with himself, he was grateful Carol wasn’t there to see this. This meant she had a chance, a chance to outlive them all.

“Is Hershel on the council?”

-.-.-.-

Michonne knew their time was running out. She, unlike Hershel, did not believe for one moment that Blake was going to let them go; she knew him, she had seen into those eyes and seen the complete blankness in them. He was a sociopath; he did not care about what happened to them. He would kill them all.

“Andrea, listen to me.” Andrea nodded, her head still against Michonne’s lap. “He’s going to try and get us out there, to make a spectacle for everyone to see.”

She could feel Andrea’s tears wetting her pants, and she tried to swallow the lump she was feeling at the back of her throat. “Please,” Michonne’s voice broke, “I need you not to say anything to aggravate him, I need you to be alright, please.”

“Is Hershel on the council?” The two of them startled as the truck’s door on Hershel’s side suddenly open, a woman gently helping the old man out of the truck.

“It’s happening,” Michonne whispered as she saw someone approaching her side. She hurriedly nudged Andrea’s forehead with hers. “I love you,” she whispered kissing her quickly on the lips before being pulled out of the truck.

“What about Michonne?”

Michonne didn’t dare to look back at Andrea, choosing to raise her head and keep a blank look on her face as she was guided to stand next to Hershel, in plain sight of the others.

“Or Andrea?”

She was too much of a coward to look at Andrea, but something on her chest loosened when she felt her take a step a little closer to her once they were standing together, so they were touching as much as they were allowed.

“Are they on the council too?”

-.-.-.-.

Connor closed his eyes in pain as he saw them pull first Hershel, then Michonne, and finally Andrea out of the cars. Lining them up in front of the tank for all of them to see.

“We need to kill this son of a bitch,” he heard Murphy mutter from behind him, and he nodded in agreement.

“I don’t make decisions anymore.”

Connor put a hand on Daryl’s back, he could see his brother was trying to keep himself calm but it was too much. The hand on Daryl’s back did seem to calm him a little bit, and truly that was all he could do at the moment.

They watched as they forced the three of them to kneel, one of theirs behind each one with a gun ready to use if needed.

“You are making them today, come down here, and let’s have that talk.”

“Fuuuuuckkkk,” Murphy moaned as a coughing fit hit him yet again, suddenly followed by Sasha that was out of bed once again.

“You need to go there,” Daryl’s rough voice broke the relative silence that had fallen upon their group. “We don’t know if that tank has anymore charges, but you need to go and stall.”

“And we’ll do what? He needs to get my dad back!” Maggie yelled at Daryl, taking a step closer to him to which Connor moved to stand in between them.

“He never said we wouldn’t, Rick needs to go, talk to him, calmly,” Connor said, pausing to give Rick a look, who was looking down at his pistol to see how many bullets he had left. “We need him to see what the fuck is it that he wants, see if his followers are as fucked up as he is, or maybe they just don’t know.”

“But my dad!”

“I’m going,” Rick said, finally looking back at the scared group of people around him. “I’m going to get him back, Maggie, I will.”

“Dad?”

Murphy closed his eyes, as he felt Carl move away from him. He knew Carl well enough to hear the panic in that lonely word, and he would do anything in the world to keep that pain and fear away from his little friend if he could.

As he watched Rick approach Carl, he realized something.

Carol wasn’t there.

“Where’s Carol?” Murphy asked, whispering as he approached both Connor and Daryl, who were now next to the fence as they looked at the army waiting for them.

“Wait, what?” Connor said, frowning as he looked around. Maggie and Beth were next to them, their faces pressed against the fence their eyes never leaving their father’s form. “She must be with the kids, there wouldn’t be anyone else there.”

Daryl didn’t say anything. He grinded his teeth as he kept his mouth shut, he would tell them once they went through this. There was no need to get his brothers in a frenzy as they were about to face possible death.

She was safe, that was what mattered.

He was not even going to think otherwise. She was safe, away from the tank, she was just waiting for them to go and bring her back home.

She was safe.

“She’s safe.” Daryl muttered as he moved to open the gate for Rick to leave. Carl immediately took a place beside him, watching as his father started to make his way down the hill and towards their enemies. “She’s safe.”

“Good,” Connor answered as he and Murphy moved to arm themselves from their stock. Daryl closed his eyes for a moment as he felt them move away from him. He would tell them later; they would be mad at him but they would understand. They needed to be alive to be able to go back to her first.

“He’s going to be okay,” Daryl said to Carl softly, as he saw Zach move and stand on his other side, between him and Maggie, eyes on the Governor and ready if anything went down.

They all needed to get out of this alive.

-.-.-.

Michonne could feel Andrea trembling beside her as they watched their family get ready. They all watched as Daryl opened the gate for Rick, and as he started walking down the path that would lead to them.

Her mind was going a mile a minute, trying to figure out a way to signal Rick, signal the rest of them but it was futile. She just hoped the others had any type of plan.

She really didn’t want to die today.

-.-.-

“Stay here,” Daryl muttered to Zach, “do not lose him from your sight. Let me know when they start talking.” Zach gave him a crisp nod, his eyes settled on the Governor on top of the tank.

Daryl walked back to where his brother, Tyreese and the rest of them were. “We need to start moving people like we planned to, to the woods through the admin building.”

His eyes searched his brothers, getting the approval from them he didn’t know he was looking for. “We don’t have the numbers to take him on, and if he wants the prison in exchange for them?” he made a head motion towards where they had their people kneeling down. “I say Rick should give it to him.”

“When was the last time someone checked the stuff on the bus?”

“The day before the big spot run, we were low on rations then, we’re low on rations now.” Sasha answered, she was still looking pale and Daryl tried not to glare at Tyreese for not helping her. She looked far worse than Murphy did, and he felt like he wanted to wrap Murphy in blankets and sent him on his way.

“We’ll manage, if things go south I want everyone to head to the bus, let everyone know.” Daryl sighed, starting to move around the siblings to get to the weapons bin, he needed to arm himself.

“What if not everyone makes it to the bus? How long do we wait?”

“As much as possible.” He answered as he reached the bin, taking the handgun Murphy passed him checking it before moving to put in on the waistband of his pants, in his back. He put the strap of his crossbow across his chest, keeping it on his back; before accepting the rifle Connor had ready for him.

“If things go south, you go and get on that bus Murph.” Daryl said quietly as he stood between his brothers. “We meet in the cabin in the woods if we split up.”

“Are you daft? I’m not leaving you, neither of you.” Murphy sneered as he looked at the side of Daryl’s face, while Daryl took another handgun and checked it for ammo.

“You’re still sick, Murph,” Connor said as he put his hands on the edge of the bin, not looking at Murphy either. “We will find you if something happens.” Connor pushed the bin towards Bob, glaring at the man that had been looking at them intently, he made a motion for him towards the rest of them and he watched as Bob started to hand out the weapons.

“You two are fucking mad!” Daryl grabbed Murphy by the arm, pushing him against the fence as he looked around the people still inside the fence. Everyone was worried by other things to notice their commotion, and he was glad for that.

“Listen!” Daryl said sharply as he shook Murphy, “shit is going to go down, and we need to know you are safe, we need you safe!”

“What about Carol?”

“Rick ba-“

“Daryl!” Zach’s hurried whisper made the three of them turn to look at him in unison. “He’s there!”

“Stay safe!” Daryl said quickly, dropping a kiss on Murphy’s forehead before moving to stand at the fence once again.

-.-.-.

“Let them go.”

Michonne’s eyes were on Rick who didn’t look at them. His eyes were glassy, and he looked scared. Her arm brushed Andrea’s and there was nothing else she wanted the most but to be able to pull her into her arms for one second, just for one.

Andrea whimpered beside her and Michonne had to try really hard to keep her own tears at bay. The man beside Andrea pushed the noose of the rifle deeper into her back, and Michonne wanted to kill him. She was going to kill him.

“I’ll stay down here, we’ll talk as long as you want, but you let them go. You have a tank; you don’t need the hostages.”

Michonne couldn’t focus on Rick’s words. She knew what was going to happen. She knew what was coming. She tried to look at Hershel, moving her face just enough to be able to see him. He was calm, he looked at peace.

He knew what was going to happen too.

-.-.-

Daryl looked around him. He was standing on Zach’s left, Murphy next to him with Carl in between him and Connor. They had been able to get everyone capable to holding a weapon armed, while the rest of them had gone in and started rounding up the sick and the children, getting them ready to leave.

“We need to do something,” Carl said as they all kept their sights set on the Governor and his group. They were too far away to hear what was going on, but not too far away to take a shot.

“Your dad is handling it.”

“I can get him from here,” Murphy said, his eye on the sight of his rifle, only looking up to see the flames at in the tower to check for wind. “I’m pretty sure I can kill him from here.”

“Take it.” Carl said, not a doubt in his voice.

“Don’t.” Daryl said at the same time, looking up from his rifle putting a hand on the barrel of Murphy’s. “Don’t do it, Murph.”

“Why not? He could end this, right now.” Carl asked, looking at Daryl as if he was crazy.

“Or he could start something else lad, we have three people down there, what do you think will happen if their leader just drops dead out of nowhere?”

Everyone was listening to Connor’s words, as they looked while Rick and the Governor continued to talk.

“It would be signing their death warrant.”

“Atta boy,” Connor whispered to Zach before returning to his sight. He knew Murphy could take the shot, but that would only bring hell on earth to the four down there. They needed to give everyone their best shot.

They needed to survive.

-.-.-

She knew the sound of her sword leaving its scabbard better than anyone. So when she saw Blake jumping off the tank, followed by that sound. She knew it was done.

Michonne turned her head to look at Andrea, their guards too preoccupied by what was going on to prevent it from her. Andrea’s blue eyes met hers, and she felt as a tear fell down her cheek.

The end had come.

-.-.-

Maggie and Beth cried out when their father’s head was pulled back, Michonne’s sword at his neck.

“I’m taking the shot,” Murphy said, his voice flat as he moved to position the rifle once again.

“Do not take the shot!” Daryl barked at his brother, watching as Rick moved closer to the fence, saying something to the people behind it.

“I’m taking the shot.”

“Do not take that shot! Rick’s got it!” Daryl said again, breathing hard as they watched Rick continue to talk to the man and talk to his people.

They watched as the Governor started to pull the sword back, slowly.

Murphy shot rang out a second later.

-.-.-.-

Michonne threw herself over Andrea’s body as soon as shots started being fired. She didn’t even dare to turn towards were Hershel had been. She knew perfectly well how sharp that sword was.

She needed to get Andrea out of there.

“Move!” She yelled at Andrea, as she started pushing her away from the middle of the fray, moving as fast as they both could across the front of the cars and trying to get to safety.

“Andrea! Move!” Michonne yelled again as people continued to shoot around them, towards the prison. “Move!”

Andrea didn’t move.

-.-.-.-

After Murphy’s first shot, he didn’t stop firing.

He had hit the man on the upper chest, while Rick’s shot a moment later had hit him on the shoulder on the same side.

The Governor was not dead yet, and he wouldn’t stop until he was.

He felt Daryl freeze up momentarily, as Maggie and Beth cried around them. The old man was dead, there was no going back. It took Daryl a couple of seconds before he too started opening fire, and then hell was let loose.

Bullets were flying all around, and Murphy never stopped firing back. He was still firing when Connor pushed him down, when a bullet got too close to comfort.

“Fuck,” Daryl said as they all watched as the tank started to move in. It was time to run.

.-.-.-

“Andrea, please,” Michonne cried, as she tried to push Andrea from where she was slumped, face down in the grass. She didn’t move.

A shot hit the grass beside her. She was still breathing heavily, and crying when she got to the back of the truck that had brought them here. She was shaking so bad that when she tried to cut the ropes that kept her hands behind her, she cut her hand with the plate.

Her hands were bloody and shaking when she brought them in front of her, they were shaking when she took down a man running close to her, took his gun and shot him.

She was still shaking while she sat behind the vehicle and cried.

-.-.-

They followed Daryl’s lead. The five of them, together with Sasha and Tyreese were the only ones left still shooting at the newcomers; everyone had fled away from the fence and were trying to get out of the prison anyway they could.

Connor couldn’t blame them, really.

“Murphy!” Connor yelled, in between shots, as they started to follow Daryl as he moved to a better covered position. Murphy ignored him, as he pushed Carl in front of him keeping him between Zach and himself.

“Murphy!” Connor yelled again, grabbing the back of Murphy’s shirt and keeping him from moving any further.

“What?!”

“Carol!” The look of panic Connor saw on Murphy’s face; he was sure it was just a reflection of his own. “You need to go find Carol, get her to safety, her and the kids!”

“I…” Murphy stopped, shaking his head as he tried to make sense of what was being asked of him, “Connor…”

“Murphy, go!” It was not a question; it was an order.

Murphy looked lost, first at Daryl who was still next to the fence shooting at the incoming army, before looking back to Connor.

“We will find you, go get Carol to safety.”

Murphy nodded, taking a deep breath before turning and running towards the inside of the prison. It was what they had agreed, they all had promised that if there was ever the need to flee; if for some reason they had to run away. One of them would make sure Carol made it.

They would all be willing to die as long as Carol made it through. They needed her to make it through.

He didn’t realize he was crying until he got inside the prison.

-.-.--.-.-

Connor watched Murphy start running inside the prison for a moment, before he moved to cover Carl’s back.

The four of them spread out, taking down as many men and women as they were able to.

They all jumped when the tank fired against the prison once again.

“We need to get rid of that,” Connor muttered as he passed some of the ammo he had filled the pockets of his cargo pants with to Daryl.

“Where’s Murphy?!” Daryl yelled, ducking again when another missile from the tank hit one of the prison’s walls.

“I sent him to get Carol and the kids out,” Connor answered as he moved to peer over a crate to try and find a good spot to shoot. “He’ll get them out, told him we will join him later.”

“Son of a bitch!” Daryl said as he stood quickly and fired more rounds before ducking once again.

“Is he inside?!” Zach asked, covering his head as more fire fell upon them.

“We need to move from here, we’re sitting ducks.” Daryl said before he pointed at his left. “You two go that way,” he pushed Carl towards Connor to the safer place, closer to the back of the prison. “Zach and I will cover you.”

Connor and Daryl’s eyes met for a moment, and Connor couldn’t help but know that his brother was not saying something.

“Go get Murphy, get the fuck out of here.”

“But my dad,” Carl said, looking at Daryl desperately.

“We’ll find you, he’ll find you!”

Connor pulled Carl by the back of his shirt and forced him to follow him as soon as Daryl stood up to shoot, covering them.

Daryl would be able to find them, he had complete faith in his brother.

-.-.-

“Carol!” Murphy yelled as soon as he got into cellblock C, “Carol!”

Dust fell from the ceiling as an explosion was heard, the tank had hit somewhere in the prison. He had no time to lose.

“Carol!” He reached their room, only to find it empty. He had to lean on the wall as he started coughing, the dust flying around not helping at all. “Carol!” he yelled again as soon as he was able to breathe once again.

He could hear screaming, but there was no answer. Quickly he grabbed the first bag he could find, and started shoveling anything that was of any importance inside. He grabbed Daryl’s quiver, Connor’s bible and the book he knew Carol was using to keep her small gifts. Before leaving the room, he grabbed Daryl’s poncho, shoveling it inside the bag as he ran down.

He needed to find Carol.

-.-.-.

Daryl and Zach were giving them enough cover to be able to make their escape. He was going to take Carl, and get him out through the breach at the end of the prison. He knew that was probably the way Murphy would  get out through, so they would regroup and come back for Daryl.

He was thinking about that when he heard the sound of the wind breaking as the missile flew over their heads. He barely had time to push Carl down before the wall of the second floor closest to them exploded.

Everything went black.

-.-.-

Daryl watched as his brother ran away pushing Carl in front of him. There was no time to lose, he needed to get cover for him and Zach; and they needed to get rid of the fucking tank.

“Here!” Daryl said to Zach signaling him to follow him as he moved further towards the now burnt tower. There were some crates there, some metal cabinets that would provide them enough cover to regroup.

“You okay?” Daryl asked Zach, as soon as he made sure they were covered enough.

“Yeah.” Daryl gave the boy a nod, he looked pale and shaky but he trusted him. He trusted Zach to have his back, and he was going to make sure they got out of this one. He was going to get his brothers, and then get Carol and they would all be okay.

They had to.

The grunting and shuffling made Daryl close his eyes for a moment. The last thing they needed it right then were walkers, but of course they were getting walkers. Of fucking course.

“Stay here,” Daryl whispered to Zach, moving slowly to grab his knife. Before waiting until the walker was close enough to get it on his skull.

“I got an idea.” Zach said, smirking as he showed Daryl some metal poles he found on the ground. Daryl raised an eyebrow, it sounded like something Connor would do, but as the first shots sounded against the cabinet; it could work.

-.-.-.

Murphy knew there was no way he could make it outside once again, so he took into the tombs. He ran as fast as he could, stopping just when he felt his lungs giving out on him; only to start running as soon as he could once he was able to breathe once more. He couldn’t find her.

When he tried to make it back towards cell block C he found his way blocked by debris. He was trapped.

His only way out was through the back, through the admin building. He got to the admin building, he had needed to climb to the second floor to be able to pass. He looked out a window and saw the tank.

Murphy pressed his hands against the window, trying to look for his brothers in the middle of the battle being fought down there.

He found Daryl close to the fence, Zach at his side.

He couldn’t find Connor.

“Where the fuck are you, you wanker?” Murphy muttered just before he noticed Carl off to the side. He knew Connor would never leave Carl behind. It wasn’t until then that he noticed that Carl was standing over someone’s corpse.

His heart stopped beating.

He didn’t notice the tank pointing towards the admin building.

-.-.-

When Connor started to come around, it was only to the feeling of being dragged.

“What the fuck?”

“Connor!” Connor squinted up, wincing when the light got to his eyes, to see a worried looking Carl peering down at him. “Connor! Come on!”

Connor shook his head, closing his eyes and opening them again trying to make the dizziness go away. Carl was still calling for him, pulling at his arm.

“Connor, come on, get up!”

It was then when Connor remembered where he was, what was happening.

“What the fuck happened?” He asked as he was finally able to put his feet under him, getting up with the help of Carl.

“We almost got blown away, we need to go.”

Connor looked around. There were bodies everywhere, but none of them looked like his siblings. “But Murphy, Daryl.”

“He said he would find us, come on!”

Connor nodded, his vision swirling around him enough for him to let Carl help him move.

He needed to sit.

-.-.-

Zach was covering his back, as Daryl made his way closer to the tank. The prison was being overrun by walkers, but he needed to get rid of that tank.

The tank was able to shoot one last time towards the admin building. Daryl dropped the walker he was using as shield, before he pulled a grenade that Connor had given him, pulled the pin and thrown it into the tank’s muzzle.

He pulled one of his handguns out as he covered Zach from the walkers for him to join him.

The last of the Governor men standing got out of the tank.

Zach shot him on the head.

The two of them heard running steps coming from behind them, they turned around pointing their weapons, only to find Beth running towards them.

“Beth!” Zach said as he pulled the blond into his arms, feeling as she sagged against him in relief.

“I was trying to find the kids, to get them to the bus, but I couldn’t find them!”

“We need to go,” Daryl said as he looked around. His brothers were not there; he had made sure of that.

He needed to go find them.

“We got to go.”

The two teenagers followed him.

-.-.-

Connor had gotten Carl to let him sit; the gunshots had stopped for a moment, and the boy had let him sit down for just a second.

“Carl!”

Carl turned to look at Connor, as if asking for him to tell him it was true what they were hearing. That it was not a hallucination.

“Carl!” Connor staggered onto his feet, trying to follow Carl as he shot out running at the second time they heard his name being called out.

Rick fucking Grimes had made it through this. Connor had to close one eye to keep his double vision from fucking up his aim, as he killed one of the walkers getting close to them while Carl killed the other with the shotgun.

Rick Grimes looked like shit.

Connor couldn’t help but send a prayer to the heavens for his brothers, and Carol. He was going to find them.

He had to find them.

-.-.-

Murphy woke up at the sound of two lone shots. His head was pounding, and he had no idea for how long he had been out.

There was a hole in the office where it hadn’t been one just a few minutes before. He had been lucky. The blast had thrown him away against a couch. He grabbed onto the bag he had apparently dropped while he was taking his impromptu nap, and got out of that office. His only way was through the back, and he had to get there.

He knew he was bleeding, his head was killing him and he was almost sure he had a dislocated shoulder. But he needed to get out of there, he needed to find Carol; and then his brothers would find him. His brother, Daryl, would find him.

He couldn’t stop now, he couldn’t stop and try to make sense of what he had seen. He couldn’t let himself try and process what he had seen right then. Because if he did, if he let himself think about it? if he let himself think about what he had seen? Then that would make it real,  and He would never get out of there alive if it was real. And he owed Carol, he owed Daryl to get out of there and back to them. He owed it to Connor. 

-.-.-.

Carol was two miles away from the prison when she finally noticed the smoke.

“No!”

She hit the pedal to the max. She needed to get there. She needed to see for herself.

It was probably nothing; they were burning the dead from the flu.

Murphy was alright. Connor was alright. Daryl was alright.

They were fighting with each other; they were ganging up on Daryl. They were waiting for her to get home.

Her boys were alright.

They had to be.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry?


	7. After

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BEWARE CHANGE IN RATING. 
> 
> For those that want to avoid the M rating part. It starts where the phrase is in bold and italics, and ends at the end of that scene. 
> 
> Also, want to apologize for the delay. It's been a rough week for everyone involved in this project. Hopefully next chapter will be out on time. Also, all the mistakes are mine, this has not been beta-ed.

**Chapter VII**

**After**

His lungs felt like there were a thousand nails inside of them, his vision blurring as he jumped over a knocked down tree. He was sure the walkers could follow him based on how hard he was breathing only.

Murphy didn’t know how much longer he could continue.

He had lost all sense of time. He had run out of the prison, escaped through the back of the admin building only to run into a small herd of walkers that was making its way towards the noise made by their battle. They weren’t that many, fifteen at the most; and if it had been him and his brothers they would have been able to take them.

But he was alone.

He was sick.

He was sure he was going to die.

A coughing fit made him fall into his hands and knees, he needed to get up and continue running, he needed to continue going; his lungs didn’t agree with him. He could hear the shuffling and moaning from the walkers around him, some were still following from the prison, others were now noticing him as they made their way towards the prison. He was not going to make it.

Murphy yelped when a walker suddenly fell beside him, he was still coughing when he pulled his rifle and rammed it into the walker’s head. He stood up, using the trunk as support to get up. He needed to continue on, he needed to find Daryl and Carol; he owed it to Connor to at least let them know what had happened.

Connor would have kicked his ass if he gave up that easily.

Murphy looked around him, a group of nine or ten walkers were shuffling his way, he coughed once more, taking a breath as deep as he could before his lungs started seizing on him, before he started walking as fast as he could away from them.

Under his breath he started softly praying. Praying to his mam to give him strength, praying to God to look after Carol and Daryl so he could find them. He prayed to Connor so he could keep going.

He was crying.

Murphy was looking over his shoulder to see where the walkers were, when suddenly there was moaning to his side, and he was barely able to raise his arm, push the walker away and continue walking.

There was more moaning around him, he didn’t want to use what he had left of his ammo because he was sure he was just going to attract more of them. But if he couldn’t find something soon, he wasn’t sure he was going to make it, even if he did use it.

Murphy slipped as the earth suddenly dipped, the sounds of walkers behind him got closer as he quickly composed himself. He was looking over his shoulder as he ran, he didn’t notice the change in surfaces as he stepped on the road, too preoccupied by the walker behind him.

He was still too busy trying to get rid of the walker that had caught up with him to do anything about the car coming towards him, all he could do was throw the walker under its path and brace for impact.

He looked to the sky just before he was hit. The blow was harder than he thought it would be.

-.-.-

Carol was driving as fast as she was able to. The wagon wasn’t made for speed, and she slammed her hands against the wheel as she took a curve faster than she would ever had if this had been before the end of the days happened.

She was avoiding walkers as best as she could, knowing that at her speed, a walker could be the reason for her death. And she had to get to the prison, she had to get back home.

She took yet another curve, having to slow down a little bit since it was a steep one, when suddenly there was something, someone in the middle of the road.

Carol hit the brakes, her car skidded to try and stop the momentum of the vehicle but it was of no use. The car jumped when one of her front wheels ran over something, before hitting whomever it had been standing in the middle of the road.

She knew who it had been, she just didn’t want to believe it.

“Murphy!” Carol screamed as she got off the car, leaving the door open not caring about anything but reaching the slumped form in the middle of the road.

She dropped to her knees beside him, pulling out her gun from the back of her pants and shooting the two walkers that were getting too close to comfort. She didn’t even wait to see them drop.

“Murphy, Murph.” Her voice was breaking as she softly touched him all over, she didn’t know where she had hit him, she didn’t know if he was alive.

Shaking, she moved her hand to touch the side of his neck, letting out a small cry when she felt his pulse strong under it. He was still out cold though.

“Wake up, Murphy,” Carol said as she shook his shoulder, her hands moving once again to touch his neck, his spine to try and see if there was anything broken.

He was still not waking up.

There was shuffling and moaning coming from both sides of the road, making Carol look away from Murphy to see how close they were.

“Murphy! Wake up!” She was starting to get desperate. Murphy was not giving any signs of waking, so Carol took matter into her own hands.

Running she opened the door to the back seat, before running back, her knife out as she took one of Murphy’s hands and started to drag him towards the car. She couldn’t help but thank god that she had somewhat slowed down, she had hit him but it could have been worse.

Carol looked warily at the walker that got into the road a few yards away from them.

“Murphy, come on!” Carol said as she pulled him, as fast as she could. She loved her men, but there was no way in hell she would ever be able to carry either of them. They were too damned heavy.

The walker shuffled quicker towards them, and Carol dropped Murphy’s arm to grab her knife and slamming it to the walker’s head.

She left Murphy lying next to the car, running to get the bag he was carrying before returning to him. She threw the back to the passenger seat, before moving back to him. More walkers started to walk into the road, noticing the two of them fast enough to worry Carol.

“For fucks sake, Murphy,” Carol muttered as she moved Murphy’s legs so they were bended at the knee, before she used all of her weight pulling at both of his arms to get him to sit, and then off the ground. She was barely able to keep the two of them off the ground, throwing her shoulder into his side getting him to fall into the back seat.

She knew that she shouldn’t be moving him, he could be seriously injured, his spine, his head; but there was no time for that. She would have to pray and hope that they would get lucky. She needed them to get lucky.

Carol run around the car, shooting three walkers that had gotten too close to the other side of the car before opening the other side of the back seat and reaching across to pull Murphy in. She closed the door once she was satisfied, before running back around bending his legs at the knees so he could fit in and closed the door.

She yelped when she turned around to find a walker almost on top of her, using another one of her bullets to get rid of it.

Carol got into the driver’s seat, closing the door and not waiting a minute longer. She threw the car into reverse, turning to look over her shoulder as she avoided and nicked walkers before she was able to have enough space to make a U-turn.

She had to find another way to the prison, something was not right if Murphy was out there running on his own.  

Carol extended a hand towards the back, patting over Murphy until she found his arm and then his hand. She drove with one hand while clutching Murphy’s with the other.

She had found one of them, now she just needed him to wake up.

.-.-.-

When Murphy woke up, his head was killing him. He groaned as he moved, blinking fast as he tried to touch his head. Only to find himself unable to move one of his arms, something was keeping it in place.

Terror filled his veins as everything suddenly came back. He had been running away, he had been trying to get away from the walkers, when suddenly everything went back.

“Murph, Murphy.” His eyes opened fully when he was able to process the words that were being said to him. The person who was calling out his name to him.

He moved to sit up quickly, hissing as the pain on his side overcame the one in his head.

“Easy, Muffin, please don’t hurt yourself.” He noticed then that they were in a car, that he was in the back seat of a car being driven by his Carol. He was not walker food, he was alive, he had found Carol.

Suddenly it was too much. Tears started to stream down his face, as his breath hitched as a sob erupted from his chest. His lungs started to protest as soon as he started sobbing, making him start coughing as he tried to get enough air in.

Carol hit the brakes in the middle of the empty road. She didn’t even turn the car into park, before she had turned the engine off and was climbing over the middle of the seats to the back.

Murphy didn’t care about the fact that he had basically been run over not that long ago, he pulled Carol to him as she climbed over, clutching her close to him as soon as she was within reach. His chest was still heaving from his sobs, as he rested his head on her chest his arms wrapped around her so tight that there was barely any space in between them.

Murphy cried for what felt like hours, as Carol cried softly into his hair, her hands running through it as she tried to comfort him.

He cried himself into such state that he was barely able to keep his eyes open when Carol finally realized he had stopped.

“I love you,” Carol whispered into his ear, as she moved back letting him pull her down to lie down in the back seat with him.

She wanted to know what had happened, but at the same time she didn’t. She could imagine on her own. They were together now, that’s what was important.

She kept watch as Murphy fell asleep on her arms, she would let him rest for a little while. He looked pale, he was all sweaty and the side of his face was slightly swollen. He would let him sleep for an hour and then she would get the whole story out of him.

Murphy was laying on top of her, his head burrowed under her chin as he clutched her to him like he was afraid to let go. She dropped a kiss on top of his head as she hugged him closer to her.

She felt her eyes start burning with tears, where were Daryl and Connor? Why was Murphy alone?

Carol tried to sleep for a little bit, while Murphy’s breath caressed her neck reminding her with each one of them that he was right there with her; that he was alive, that she wasn’t alone.  She could hear the sounds of the night, the sound of animals, bugs; and thankfully not the sound of walkers.

From where she was lying down, she could get glimpses of the time on the dashboard. When an hour passed, she knew it was time to wake Murphy up. Night had fallen, they were out in the open but she had to wake him even if she couldn’t bear the thought of disturbing his rest. Her love probably had a concussion, and she had no idea how grave it was; there was no way of knowing how grave it was.

“Murphy,” Carol whispered into his ear as she ran her hands up and down his back.

“Murphy, love,” she smiled softly into his hair as she tried to keep her tears at bay as she used the term of endearment the three of them liked to use with her the most. “Wake up, I need you to wake up.”

Murphy just groaned, moving to try and burrow himself further into her. “I need you to wake up, baby, I need to make sure that hard head of yours still intact.”

“I’m the smart one, just remember that.” Murphy muttered, groaning as he moved to sit up. The world was spinning a little bit, so he groaned dropping his head against the headrest.

“Don’t go to sleep once again.” He didn’t dare to open his eyes, feeling as Carol moved around him as if searching for something. “What does it hurt?”

“Everything?” Murphy said, opening one of his eyes trying to make sense of where she was exactly with the little light the full moon was giving them.

“Here…” Carol said as she turned around from where she was leaning towards the front passenger seat, penlight in one hand and a couple of pills on the other.

“I don’t want to be knocked out again,” Murphy muttered as he watched the light disappear again as she turned towards the front once again.

“It’s just ibuprofen.” Carol passed him a water bottle, not taking it back until he had drunk at least half of it.

She had turned off the penlight, but he could feel her eyes on him from where she was sitting in between the two front seats. He could feel where their knees were barely touching, and he just couldn’t stand their separation any longer.

“Carol?” There must have been something in his voice, because he had barely finished calling out her name when she was gently moving to straddle him. She kept most of her weight off his lap, on her knees until he put his arms around her waist and pulled her into him.

“What happened, Murph?” Her hands were caressing his cheeks, and he just couldn’t stop the tears from forming once again. He let out a deep breath, closing his eyes as he felt her kiss his forehead and keep her lips there.

Her arms were around his shoulders, and he just couldn’t help when his breathing hitched once again with a sob.

“I lost them,” Murphy’s voice broke as he started his retelling. “We realize we couldn’t find you, so Connor sent me to go get you.”

“I looked everywhere for you, why couldn’t I find you?” Carol moved back, putting her hands on Murphy’s cheeks and raising his face so she could look into his eyes. He sounded so lost as he recounted how he hadn’t been able to find her in the middle of what had happened to them. She could barely see him, but she knew him. He needed to know.

“Because I wasn’t there.”

“What?” Carol closed her eyes, feeling as tears started falling down her own cheeks and her chest to heave as she felt Murphy move back. His hands were on her shoulders, keeping her balanced but other than their lower halves, they were not touching anymore. “What do you mean that you weren’t there? Where were you?”

“Murphy,” Carol’s breath hitched as she tried to continue her sentence, “Karen and David…”

“It was you?”

“They were already dying, Karen had stopped breathing so Connor kept her from turning, and David’s breathing was so shallow you could barely notice it.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t Connor tell me?” There was betrayal in his voice, and that only made Carol cry harder.

“I was going to tell you all, but then Tyreese attacked Daryl and everything happened, you got sick, Daryl left and I just couldn’t.” She was outright crying by then, sobs racking her body as she sat there in front of Murphy with her head down knowing that she wouldn’t be able to handle if there was even a hint of disgust in his eyes. “I’m so sorry.”

“You weren’t in the prison at all, weren’t you?” Carol couldn’t help but cry harder. His hands on her shoulders were not allowing her to move as she wanted, so she just sat there, crying while on his lap.

“Where were you?”

“Rick-“ Carol had to stop to try and control herself, “Rick kind of figured it out, he left me when we went to get the medicines.”

Carol tried to move her arms, to hug herself as she tried to move away from Murphy. His silence was killing her, and she didn’t know what she would do.

“I’m going to kill him,” Murphy muttered before he pulled her as close to him as possible, burrowing his face in her neck as he felt her start crying against him. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there, love, I’m sorry, please forgive me.”

Carol couldn’t believe what it was happening, and she just couldn’t comprehend what Murphy was saying. She had thought she had cried everything she had in herself the night before, but she hadn’t.

“Murphy…” They had been sitting there, in the dark in silence for a couple of minutes. The two of them having calmed down enough to be able to breathe normally. Carol had her head on Murphy’s shoulder, as she continued to straddle him in the back seat. “I know something must have happened, and you said Connor sent you to get me…”

“Last time I saw Daryl was alive, him and Zach were watching each other’s backs.”

The fact that he didn’t mention Connor was enough for her to start crying again. She moved back, her hands once again tracing his neck until she was cradling his face in them. There was nothing but pure unadulterated pain in his face, as he grimaced trying to keep himself from starting to cry again.

“I love you,” Carol said as her face reflected his. There was nothing else she could say, what could she tell him after losing his twin, losing his other half? There was nothing in this world that could express what the two of them were feeling.

What losing Connor meant.

“It’s Connor,” Murphy said between breaths, “how am I supposed to live without Connor?”

“I know, baby,” Carol muttered as she started pressing kisses whenever she could reach trying to bring him some comfort, trying to console him in any way she could.

When she kissed the side of his mouth, he chased her lips. When their lips met for the first time in almost a week, there was no tenderness, there was no playfulness which was something that usually plagued their kisses. It was raw love, and need what drove them.

“Murphy,” Carol said breathy in between kisses, as Murphy’s hands started to wander. “Murph,” she moaned as Murphy bit her lower lip harder than necessary.

 ** _“I need to feel you,”_ ** he whispered as he moved from her lips and started kissing her jaw, the side of her neck. “I need to feel something other than this,” his voice broke, unable to finish the sentence.

Carol understood. She knew didn’t need to know what _this_ was, she knew what he was feeling. And if she could give him that, if she could help him forget for at least a moment, she would give it to him. She would move the earth for him.

She moved back, never far enough that he couldn’t continue kissing her, groping her. She moved far enough to be able to get rid of her boots, pants and underwear; before moving again to straddle Murphy’s legs.

The only sounds were those of their moans and grunts as they moved. Carol undid Murphy’s belt, pulling his hard cock out of the pants just long enough to line him up and lowering herself into him. There was no romance, there was no fun and teasing in that.

The pace she set was unmerciful, and it didn’t take her long to have him come inside of her.

When it was done she didn’t move. Murphy was still silent; he was still inside of her.

He gave her a small sad smile.

He wasn’t alone anymore.

.-.-.

He didn’t know how much longer he could keep on running. He watched the back of Zach and Beth as they ran in front of him, and away of the prison.

Their home had fallen; their family was scattered to the four winds. The only thing he was absolutely sure of was the fact that Carol hadn’t been in that prison; she had not been part of that massacre.

Because that’s what it had been. They had had to defend their home, defend their lives against the Governor’s men. And their home had fallen, by the hands of those maniacs as well as the walkers that had fallen upon them after.

They had been lucky; his brothers had been lucky. Some of the others hadn’t. He could still see the looks of panic, of terror in the face of the people they had seen on their way out. People he hadn’t been able to help over putting a bullet on their heads as he tried to keep the two kids in front of him alive.

People he hadn’t been able to keep alive.

Daryl jumped over a log, pushing Zach forward as he moved to steady Beth who had stumbled. They couldn’t stop, the horde that was behind them was too big for them to take on. They needed to get more distance between them.

They needed to survive this. He owed it to Hershel, he owed it to Rick. He owed it to Carol to find her and get back to her, he owed it to himself.

“Come on!” Daryl said as he sprinted forward, ahead of Zach as the boy looked after Beth. The girl had caused them more problems than helped, if he was honest. But he wasn’t going to tell his boy to leave her behind, he would never leave someone behind if he could.

His lungs were burning, and he tried to hide the fact that he really needed to stop for a minute to get enough air into them. He was too old for this shit; his lungs were probably blackened by all the smoke from all the cigarettes he had consumed in his life. He didn’t regret a single one of them. Or maybe he would, if that lack of breath was what made him walker chow.

They were able to run through a creek, steep enough to maybe stop the walkers for a moment, even enough to get them off their trail. He wouldn’t bet on it though, so he kept on pushing them. Long enough to get across another group of trees and find themselves in an overgrown clearing.

He looked back to make sure they were following, and he dive right through it. They ran, as long as he was able to. They ran until they couldn’t anymore.

He dropped his crossbow and dropped first to his knees and then onto his back, heaving as he looked at the cloudy sky above. It was starting to get dark, he noticed as he closed his eyes for a moment, hearing as both Zach and Beth sat around him; he would need to decide what he would do, they needed to regroup.

He needed to come up with a plan to get them to their checkpoint.

“You alright?” Daryl said still lying on the ground, turning his face to look at Beth and then a Zach. The scared teenagers didn’t say anything, only nodding at him.

“Good, good.” Daryl muttered as he closed his eyes once again, patting Zach’s boot absentmindedly as it sat beside his arm. His vision was swirling around him, and he truly couldn’t remember the last time he had eaten.

He couldn’t really remember for how long they had been running if he was honest. He squinted as he looked to the sky, a few birds flying about, the sun way into the west. They had run most of the day. They had until there was no more energy for them to do so. They had run until they were somewhat safe.

He felt his eyes start to burn, and he tried to sniff back the tears that he knew it was only a matter of time before they demanded to be let out. He took a couple of deep breaths, he clenched his hands in the grass around him, trying to center himself.

There would be time for all that once he found his brothers, once he found his brothers and together they went to get Carol. Later, he promised himself; he would let himself feel everything later.

“Daryl?” He opened his eyes, noticing how more time had passed with the sun even lower in the sky now, “are we moving?”

He nodded to Zach, as grunting he sat up. He was glad his vision staid steady as he moved to stand up. He really didn’t need to pass out right then, it would almost be a death sentence if he did. Once he was up he turned to look at his companions, looking at the faces of two terrified young people.

Zach might have been in university when it all started, but the boy was barely over eighteen. In his eyes, both of them were little kids. Little kids that he had to protect. He felt his heart clench as he remembered the fact that he hadn’t even tried to look for Carol’s girls when everything went down, he just hoped somehow they had gotten out.

He couldn’t begin to think what he would say to Carol if they didn’t, he wouldn’t be able to face her if he couldn’t find them. He was a coward; he had run instead of looking for his brothers. He had run instead of looking for the girls.

He just hoped his family could forgive him. He just hoped his cowardice didn’t cost his family their lives.

Daryl motioned with his head to the two teenagers to follow him, shouldering his crossbow as he took them through the clearing. They needed food, they needed water, and they needed somewhere more safe to camp out the night.

He looked at Beth from the corner of his eyes, looking as Zach pulled her close to him with an arm around her back. He was sure a breakdown was coming, he was close to breaking down himself and he hadn’t seen his father being partially decapitated in front of him. He needed to get them to a safe place, Zach might be able to handle his own but Beth was a sitting duck out there.

They continued to move in silence, the two of them following his footsteps as they wandered in a more measured pace. His first priority was to find a place where they could spend the night, the next one would be to get them something to eat.

Then tomorrow morning, he would start tracking whomever he could find. While never forgetting that his brothers knew where they were supposed to meet if something like this ever happened. He just hoped the two knuckleheads would remember it.

He had nothing but hope nowadays. He had hoped to say what he felt to Carol, he had hoped to share his bed with his family again, he had hoped that everything would be again. He had nothing but hope in things that would probably never get to happen nowadays.

It didn’t take him long to decide where they would stay for the night. It wasn’t because it was the most secure place, it was because he just couldn’t do it any longer that night. He just needed to get away, he needed to make sure the two of them were safe and he needed to get away.

“Here,” Daryl grunted, taking a look around watching as Beth immediately sat in the middle of the small clearing while Zach moved to copy him. He nodded to him, getting a small smile in return.

“I’ll be back.” He didn’t wait to hear anything from them, his mind already on getting away from them. He barely heard Beth saying something behind him, with Zach quickly shutting her up.

His boy would keep her safe, he needed to kill something. And they needed to eat.

He walked, and walked, until he could feel the silence and peace of the forest start to fill his whole self. He stopped beside one of the biggest trees he could find, he closed his eyes, lowering his crossbow and resting his arm against it.

He dropped his head, taking a breath as deep as he could. His heart was hammering and he tried to focus on his breathing. Carol had taught him this, something she had learnt herself during the years of her marriage with that son of a bitch had had been her husband; he needed to focus, calm down his breathing and then his mind would follow suit. He couldn’t break down right then, they didn’t have the privilege of breaking down in the middle of nowhere.

His family was out there; he couldn’t give up. Not for anything.

The sound of leaves rustling had him turning around quickly, his arm with his crossbow up and pointing at where he had heard the sound coming from. He let the bolt fly before he even could think twice, hitting the weasel that was trying to run by him dead.

He sighed, stretching to get rid of the crick on his neck before moving to pick their dinner up. It was small, but it would have to do for the three of them.

He couldn’t be bothered with looking for anything else. Dropping the weasel next to the tree, he moved to sit down with his back to it. The sun was starting to disappear behind clouds and the late hour.

He pulled out his knife and started to skin the weasel. Keeping himself busy kept him from thinking about what had happened too much, it kept him from thinking about what he could have done differently; kept him from wondering if his brothers, if Carol, were still even alive.

By the time he had finished skinning the weasel, the woods had started to surround themselves in darkness and shadows. He might be a great survivalist, but he was not stupid. They would have a better chance staying together, and with the time he had spent on his own. He was sure he would be able to handle being around Zach and Beth again.

As silently as he usually moved in the woods, he made his way back to where he had come from. He didn’t realize until then how far he had actually gotten, how out of it he had been when he had left.

Zach had gathered enough tinder to get them a decent fire, and at seeing him carry the skinned weasel he moved to pick up some longer sticks so they could cook it. Daryl didn’t have any words left in him, as he worked silently as he lighted the fire, and divided the weasel enough so they could cook it.

None of them seemed interested in talking, and Daryl thanked Connor’s God for small miracles.

Night fully fell on them, and with a full belly Zach who was sitting between Daryl and Beth, closer to Beth, moved to lie down. “You take first watch?” Zach asked, closing his eyes as he saw the barely perceived nod Daryl gave him as he lost himself in the fire.

It was chilly, but not yet cold enough to bother him sitting that close to the fire. He had only had his vest and crossbow on when it had all came down, he closed his eyes as he tried to get rid of the image from that morning from his head.

There was no use in crying over what had happened, there was no use in praying he had once told Carol; he was going to find his brothers, and together they would go and find their woman.

He would not let anyone else convince him otherwise.

“We should do something,” Beth muttered from across the fire. Daryl didn’t feel like talking, not having words for the young girl. Her old man was dead, and he could have prevented it.

He should have let Murphy take the shot.

“We should do something!” her voice was louder, and Daryl wanted to snap at her and tell her to shut up. Sound like that could travel a long way in a night like that one. The light of the fire itself was cause enough to cause concern.

“We aren’t the only survivors, we can’t be.”

He was going to get them going at first light. The cabin in the woods, with the moonshine was about twenty miles away or so. They would walk until they dropped if they needed, until they got there, and then he will wait. If his brothers weren’t there by the third day, then he would leave Zach and Beth there and he would go look for them. They would be safe there.

“Rick, and Michonne, they could be out there.”

Murphy would be easier to track, and also his priority since he would probably be the one that had a worst time finding the cabin, his sense of direction was shit. Connor would probably get lost a couple of times, but he would get there. And as soon as he got them, they would leave looking for Carol.

“Maggie and Glenn could have made it out of A block.”

They would have to do something about the rest of them. Maybe leave some kind of message somewhere to point them in the right direction. Maybe even go back to the prison to try and reclaim it, although it was probably not worth it anymore.

His eyes were still on the fire, his mind just jumping from one thought to the other. He needed to see how much ammo they had, he had his bow but they needed supplies. He had gotten lucky with that weasel earlier.

“They could have.”

Daryl shook his head lightly as he saw Beth incline forward, only realizing then that she had been talking to him all the time. Zach was pretending to be asleep, his breathing wasn’t deep enough to fool him into thinking he was really getting some rest. Neither of them would probably get any rest that night.

His silence seemed to bother Beth, and he really didn’t give a shit about that. He had things to plan, he had thoughts to avoid. He never was one for meaningless words. He wanted his family, he missed his family, he didn’t want to talk about it. He missed Carol’s soft touch, only then thinking how it had been two days since he had last seen her; how her last words to him had been how much she loved him, how he hadn’t been able to say it back.

They had thought they had all the time in the world back then. They had been fools, he had been the foolest one of them all.

“You’re a tracker, you can track.”

Daryl took a deep breath, still not looking at Beth who was now standing up. He didn’t want to talk to her, he didn’t want to tell her to sit the hell down and shut the fuck up. The girl had just seen her father murdered, she sure didn’t need a grumpy asshole telling her to stop acting like she was.

But he wasn’t sure he wouldn’t say that if he opened his mouth.

“Come on! The sun will be up soon, if we head up now…”

He only saw the hand coming towards him, and he reacted. His chest was heaving when he looked up from where he had thrown himself to the side, away from the small hand of Beth that had tried to touch his shoulder. He hadn’t had a response like that in many months.

“Are you fucking stupid? Or what?”

Daryl looked from Beth’s extended hand, to an irate looking Zach, who was now standing up a few feet behind her.

“You don’t do that.” Zach said, his voice low as he took a couple of steps so he was standing between her and Daryl. “You don’t tell Daryl what to do, and as sure as hell you don’t go out looking for people when you can barely see ten feet ahead of you.”

Daryl moved so he was sitting with his legs crossed, pretending that the two teenagers weren’t fighting just a couple of feet away from him.

“It’s going to be light soon.”

“In like five hours!”

“Fine! Then I’ll go myself!”

“Are you fucking crazy?!”

Daryl barely moved out of the way when Beth came barreling down, bending down to pick the knife that Zach had stuck into the ground before walking away in a random direction.

“Beth!” Zach yelled after her, starting to trot behind her. He didn’t even look back.

Daryl sighed, looking at the fire once last time before he slowly stood up. He pushed some of the soil around the fire in, grabbing some of the leftover weasel that Beth had left in one of the sticks by the fire before grabbing his crossbow and starting to walk following their steps.

“Fucking romance novel,” he muttered as he followed them silently. He hadn’t even liked teenagers when he himself had been one.

.-.-.-.-

Connor looked over his shoulder, to see Rick shuffle behind them as Carl made sure they put as much distance between them and the prison as they were able to. He wanted to say something, Carl was moving faster than his father was able to, with his arm around his shoulders to keep him from falling on his face.

He might have gotten a mild concussion from his personal meeting with that wall, and his balance was busted. If Carl left him on his own, he was sure to fall on his side as the whole world started, or better continued, to move around him.

The boy was hurting, and in his mind the only person to blame was Rick. Connor wouldn’t tell him not to blame Rick, since in his mind although he wasn’t the only one to blame, he was sure he could have done something else… but it was past time to try and blame people for what had happened.

The prison had fallen, people were dead. And they had to live with that.

Meanwhile Carl was fuming as they made their way away from the prison, away from the remains of a life that they would never be able to return. Towards God knows where, and his mind? His mind was still too slow to comprehend that he was being taken further away from where he had to go, right then, all the could think was that he needed to keep Carl alive. For Murphy.

Rick was clearly having a hard time trying to catch up, and Connor felt somewhat bad for him. He had seen the empty bloody car seat that had prompted Carl’s mood. The man was also mourning for his lost daughter.

“Lad,” Connor said softly, looking at the top of Carl’s hat as the boy kept his arm secured around his waist but didn’t stop to look at him. “Shouldn’t we wait for your old man; he’s awfully beat up…”

He got his response in the form of Carl’s silence. Connor sighed, letting the boy set the pace. He had nothing to say to Rick, he had nothing to say to Carl. Silently, he threw out a prayer for his family to be alright. They had to be.

“Carl, slow down.” Rick said from a few feet behind them, and Connor started to slow down before being prompted by Carl to continue at the same pace.

“Carl, stop!” Connor closed his eyes as the boy stopped. Rick had no idea how to speak with his son, Rick basically had no idea of anything at this point.

“Lad, just stay calm, don’t say-“

“We need to stay together.” Connor closed his eyes, grimacing when everything started to swim around him once again. “We got to find a place, food, supplies.” Connor heard Rick finally catch up with them, and he opened one eye to look at him. Rick truly looked like shit.

“Lad…” Connor said softly as he felt Carl stiffen as his father approached them.

Rick didn’t even cared to try and let Connor speak. “We’re going to be alright,” he said as he started moving his hand to try and touch Carl.

Carl did not want to be touched. Not by him.

“Alright?” Carl scoffed, as he started to move pulling Connor along. “We just lost our home, we just lost Hershel, we just lost Judy,” Carl’s voice broke as he said his sister’s name. “We just lost everything, and you’re saying we’ll be alright? Are you fucking kidding me?”

“Do not use that language with me!” Rick said from behind them, where he had fallen behind once more.

“I don’t give a fuck what you want!”

Connor was glad Rick was behind them, since he was sure he wouldn’t appreciate the smirk on his face at the boy’s answer. Murphy would get a crack out of hearing about that.

“Murphy is going to hate having missed that.” Connor muttered a few minutes later, as they reached the road and started to walk over it. He felt Carl start to stiffen once again, and he just knew what the boy was going to say. “Don’t even think about saying it,” Connor’s voice was so full of conviction that Carl finally looked at something else than the road to look up at him. “I’m telling you right now, Carl Grimes, that if something had happened to Murphy? Or to Daryl? I would know it, I feel it in my bones, lad, they’re alive, and we’re going to find them.”

“How can you be so sure, how after everything we’ve seen, after everything we’ve lost?”

Connor looked back, seeing that Rick was far enough to not be able to hear them. He didn’t slow their pace, since Carl definitely didn’t want to speak with his father right then.

“Because I have to, because I have to believe that God still has a bigger plan for us, because I believe that my prayers go somewhere, because if I don’t…” he couldn’t finish his sentence, his voice breaking as the words got stuck in his throat.

“Can you…” Carl took a breath, looking back towards the road before continuing, “could you say a prayer for Judy? Just in case…”

“Lad,” Connor’s arm around Carl shoulders pulled him closer to his side, “I already pray for her, and for you, every single day.”

“But maybe an extra one?”

“I sure will.”

The silence after was less charged with anger, and he could feel how slowly that anger started to dissipate a little bit from Carl’s body. After another half an hour of walking, he started to put less weight on the boy, once he was having less moments of vertigo.

“You okay?” Carl asked as he moved away at his signal, still not caring about where and in what state his father was, as he tried to catch up to them.

“Yeah, seems so.” Connor did look back at Rick, grimacing when he saw him limp as fast as he could to try to catch up. As they continued walking, Connor started to slowly slow down their pace allowing Rick to catch up a little bit. It would be of no use if they got too separated, Rick was right in that, they needed to be able to protect one another; with the limited ammo that they all had.

He was not getting as dizzy, although his head was still killing him. “There’s seem to be something up ahead.” Connor said, pointing at where they could see a house just behind some trees where the road did a turn.

“I always wanted to learn to ride one of those,” Carl said softly as they started walking towards what they could see now was a restaurant, seeing a bunch of bikes parked outside. “We could check those to see if they start, we could move faster.”

“Oh lad,” Connor said, chuckling as he threw an arm around Carl’s shoulders pulling him in a half hug, “I reckon neither your father nor I are in condition to drive one of those…”

“You would have to ask Decks to teach you, one of these days.” Carl gave him as much of a smile as he could, as Connor mentioned his brother. He was trying as much as he could to try and keep the boy’s spirits up. He did believe everything he told him, he just knew that his brothers were out there looking for him.

But he had to worry about the two with him first.

“Whoa,” Carl muttered as he saw Connor sway as they reached the porch of the bbq restaurant, hurrying to push him to sit as he started to fall sideways as they walked.

“The dizziness might not be completely gone, it appears.” Connor crossed his eyes, feeling the need to vomit as everything turned around him even with his eyes closed.

“Just stay here.” Rick said, as the two of them watched Carl open the outer door. “You wait with him, keep an eye on things.”

“Are you kidding me?” Connor had to close the eye that he had opened because of another dizzy spell but he couldn’t help but feel like laughing at Carl’s inability to take any of his father’s bullshit at that moment. “You should be the one to stay out here, I’ve done this before, Murphy taught me how to do this.”

Connor noticed how Rick clenched his jaw at the mention of his brother’s name. And he couldn’t help but finally allow himself the grimace of pain as he watched the two of them walk into the establishment. He was hurting all over, his head was pounding and he was sure he had at least one broken rib if not more. But Carl needed to see that there was someone on his side, he couldn’t imagine what it would have been between the two of them if he hadn’t been with them.

He moved until he was still sitting, but he was able to rest his back against one of the wooden pillars, letting his head drop as slowly the dizziness started to disappear completely once again. “Probably concussed,” he muttered to himself once the silence around him became too much.

He was not used to the silence. He was not like Daryl who could spend hours upon hours in complete silence, and not because he didn’t have anything to say, but because he had learnt to control himself that way.

He had grown up beside the infinite chatterbox that was Murphy after all. He could give as good as It gets. He smiled when he thought of usually silent Daryl, becoming not so silent during the last six months. How the three of them had slowly but surely gotten him out of his shell, and gotten him to become probably what he was always supposed to be.

Or at least he tried to imagine it like that.

He tried not to think about the death and destruction they had just lived through. He raised his face towards the sky, as a few of the clouds cleared enough to let some of the late afternoon light pass through.

“Hope you are in peace, old fart.” Connor muttered softly, smiling sadly at the sky as he thought of Hershel. “You were one of the good ones.”

The sound of a shot from inside the restaurant made him jump up, steadying himself on the pillar as he made sure the world wouldn’t start spinning around him before he pulled his berretta out and walked as fast as he could inside the building.

“Here,” Carl said as a greeting as he threw him a half opened carton of cigarettes, chuckling when he had to juggle it between his free hand and the hand with the gun on it. He couldn’t help but smile when he noticed that there were at least six packs left on the carton. He would definitely save some for when he found his brothers.

He would find his brothers, there was no doubt in his mind that he would.

“Thanks lad.” He was already pulling a cigarette out with his mouth, putting his berretta away before pulling out his worn down zippo lighter. There were four things that were on his person at all times usually. His gun, his knife, his lighter and his rosary.

He still had all four of them since running from the prison.

That was all he had from the prison.

He could feel Rick’s judgmental eyes on him, as he started stashing some of the packs in his pockets, throwing the rest inside the food bag the other two had collected. He didn’t even look at him, at Rick. He had nothing to say to him.

He was with them just because of Carl, he would stay with them just because of Carl.

He felt like he needed to tell himself that more than once, to convince himself that there was a reason for what he was doing. Like he was convincing himself that every moment he spent without looking for his brothers wasn’t because he didn’t want to, but because he had someone else to look out for.

Like he needed to justify himself.

They started walking again after they finished scavenging everything they could from the restaurant. The place had been at the outskirts of a town that he was sure him and Daryl had gone through once during one of their hunting trips. They could probably stay there for shelter that night.

The silence was giving him a headache.

“Once, when we were like ten…” Connor started talking, about anything, about everything, as him and Carl leaded the way. He could still hear Rick shuffling behind them, but with a hand behind Carl’s neck; he continued walking forward and telling him stories of him and Murphy at his age.

It was like he was trying to keep his mind, and Carl’s, out of what happened by talking. Like he just couldn’t handle the silence, because being silent meant he had time to think. And to have time to think meant that he could start speculating over what had happened to his family.

If he was silent he could see Daryl being eaten by walkers, he could see Carol being taken by a group of unknown people as she cried for him, he could see Murphy collapsing in the middle of nowhere since his brother had still being sick when all this had gone down.

So he talked, and he reminiscence about his past.  

He heard Rick calling them to stop, and he did, waiting patiently as the man once again had to catch up to them. He was right though, that house would be as good as any other.

They secured the house, and he couldn’t help but snicker when Carl once again got into his father’s face about his attitude. He watched as Carl moved to the second floor, leaving him and Rick alone for the first time.

“I’m going to check to see if there’s any painkillers left, lad, we both seem to need them.”

“Is this a joke to you?”

Connor stopped where he was, on his way out of the room, to look back at the beat up and sorry looking Rick Grimes. “Excuse me?”

“Are you going to continue encouraging him to be reckless? To be disrespectful?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He knew he shouldn’t answer back, he knew what this was. Murphy did it all the time. Rick was looking for a fight, he wanted something or someone to let his frustrations on. He wasn’t going to be that something. “Fuck of, Grimes.”

Connor left Rick barely standing in the foyer. He could barely look at him in a good day, he could do so even less that day. He made sure he was alone, as he walked towards the back of the house.

He entered the downstairs bathroom, finding it illuminated enough to allow him to close the door behind him. He closed the door, and pulled down the toilet seat. And he sat down over the toilet seat, and he cried.

He was glad Carl was upstairs, and Dick Grimes was too self-absorbed to look for him.

He cried until the light gone down. He cried until he had nothing else inside of him.

Now, he had work to do.

He had to find them all.


	8. Inmates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry guys... this was going so good, I had 2/3 done by Sunday night and I was writing the last 1/3... but then the premiere happened and it was like it sucked all the inspiration out of me. It took a long while for me to be able to get back on the saddle and write. I had already been struggling with 4B but that? that just numbed down the muse and stopped it from writing. 
> 
> I think seeing some pics of Reedus and Sean this weekend helped a lot.... 
> 
> Again, this is all me... all mistakes... all...

**Chapter VIII**

**Inmates**

 

She didn’t want to open her eyes. Light was hitting her right in the face, and she could feel the car moving, but yet, she did not want to open her eyes and face reality.

A reality where Connor was dead, and they had no idea where Daryl was. A reality where half of her soul was gone never to come back. Where she now had two angels looking after her, Sophia and Connor. A reality where her Murphy had lost half of his self.

She finally opened her eyes when she felt the car starting to slower down. Murphy was of course up front driving, while she was in the back seat wrapped up in what she now could recognize as Daryl’s poncho. It still smelled like him.

“Fuck!” Murphy muttered, dropping his forehead against the wheel, not having noticed that she was awake. Carol silently moved to sit, the poncho still wrapped around her before she put a hand on his shoulder and pushed herself into the passenger seat.

“Fuck.” She echoed at the scene in front of them. Their home, the prison, was in ruins. There were walkers in and out of it, none of them realizing that there were overlooking them. The scenery brought tears into her eyes.

She turned to look at Murphy, who had finally raised his head and was also looking out. He looked like he had aged ten years in the last two days. Her sweet mischievous Murphy was barely recognizable, the grief of the loss of Connor was visible in his face. Was visible in his whole self.

“Murph?” He looked at her, and she wanted to weep even more. He gave her as much of a smile as he could muster, and she could see he was barely able to keep himself from crying.

She would not make him break down, she would be strong for him, for Daryl. But especially, she would be strong for Connor, she was going to make sure his brothers continued on, she was sure that he would have wanted that.

“Do you think we could make it?” There was a silent portion to that question, one that he didn’t need to voice. Could they risk going into the prison to look for Connor’s body? He sure deserved a proper burial, as close to the catholic funeral he would have gotten if he had gotten killed during their stint as the saints all those years ago.

“Murphy,” Carol said as she tried as hard as she could to keep her voice from breaking. Murphy turned back to look at the prison, his face morphing as he tried as well to keep his tears at bay. He took a deep breath, before putting the car into reverse and speeding out of there.

The walkers had started noticing them there. They had barely made it less than half a mile away from the prison when Carol noticed something on the side of the road.

“Stop!”

The car skidded to a halt. Carol barely waited for the car to stop when she was throwing the door open, running from the car without any other word, not even stopping at Murphy’s panicked cries. She fell on her knees as she reached what she had seen.

Murphy approached her a couple of seconds later. She didn’t say anything other than turning and showing her the well-worn pink blanket she was clutching in her hands.

“Judy.” The word sounded like a prayer from Murphy’s lips, and Carol couldn’t help but let a small smile appear on her face. Judith was alive, she was alive, and she needed to be found. Just like Daryl did.

Carol closed her eyes, dropping her forehead to her hands, feeling like crying again when the soft fabric that she still was clutching touched her skin. Their family, what was left of it, was scattered around and she was really trying to keep her hopes up. As hard as it was when she remembered who was gone.

Who they would never get back.

“We have to find her,” Murphy said, making Carol whip around and look up at him from where she was crouching. He was looking towards the woods, away from her. “Whoever has her could need our help, we can’t leave them out there alone.”

Carol nodded at, looking down at the blanket as she braced herself. They would use the little tracking abilities they had both learnt from Daryl, they would track down Judith and then they would look for the others.

They would find Daryl, if her archer didn’t find them first. She hadn’t noticed that Murphy had disappeared from behind her, twirling around with her knife on her hand as Murphy dropped her bag beside her.

He gave her the first real smile she had seen from him since they had found each other, it wasn’t big, but it was there. And that gave her hope.

“I’ll take your bag, is heavier, and uhm…” Murphy looked down, biting his lip as he looked at her from under his eyelashes, “I might have spent more time that I should have messing with Decks, than actually learning to track.”

“I would have never believed so, never!”

She felt like a winner when she was able to get a chuckle from him, getting on her feet and pushing his hand away as he stood there offering her his backpack that was less heavy, and crammed, than hers. “I almost ran you over, you get the light one.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“If you want to get laid again in your life, don’t call me ma’am.”

“Never again, ma’am.” There was a spark of mischief deep inside his blue eyes, and Carol bit her lip as she looked at him. Her Murphy had gone through the unimaginable already, and he was still trying. They were still trying.

His hand found hers as they walked into the woods, following the deep footsteps they found in the mud. Someone heavy had gone through this part of the woods, the sigh of two other couple of small footprints made Carol’s heart beat faster.

Someone large, probably Tyreese based on the size of the prints, and two smaller persons had run away from the prison through this part of the woods. She didn’t notice she had started pulling Murphy along until he made a pained grunt. “Sorry.”

“Don’t worry love,” Murphy said as he gave her a small smile, bringing their hands up to his mouth and kissing the back of her hand. “Just not so fast, my ribs are kind of killing me.”

“Sorry I almost ran you over, Muffin.”

“I expect to be well compensated for my bodily injuries.” Murphy dropped her hand and moved closer to her, his hand running down her back until it was groping her ass.

Carol rolled her eyes, moving so she could grab his hand again before continuing to move following the footprints. “Once we find a safe place, Murph, I’ll do a full exam.”

She knew what he was doing, he was trying to avoid what had happened. He was trying to act as if nothing major had happened to him, she knew it wasn’t the best thing. That it wasn’t the healthiest way of coping. But for now, she would play along, he deserved to be allowed to escape for a little bit.

She sure wanted to do so as well.

They followed the trail.

“Aren’t you going to ask me what happened?” They had been walking for a couple of hours by then, having passed the remains of a fire where they people carrying Judith had clearly rested of the night. It had been light conversation until then, but mostly silence.

Silence did not suit Murphy, at all.

Carol sighed, looking over her shoulder were Murphy was resting for a moment with his back to a tree. He was still coughing once in awhile, and was still a little pale, but he seemed better than before. Or at least she was trying to talk herself into believing that.

“Something terrible happened, that’s all I need to know.” Her voice was soft, as she moved until she was looking up at him, her hands softly resting against his chest.

“People died…” Carol saw as he looked away from her off to the distance, as his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed. “Hershel, Andrea, Con-“

He couldn’t even say his name. She didn’t want to hear him say his name together with the others.

She tucked her head under his chin, as she wrapped her arms around him hugging him as hard as she allowed herself to do so. “Come on,” she whispered as she walked backwards a few minutes later, pulling Murphy along, “we should move.”

“Need to find the second most beautiful girl in Georgia.” Murphy’s voice broke as he tried to joke with her, as he used the back of his forearm to wipe the tears away. “Can’t let her wander on her own.”

“She needs her Muffin…” Carol rose on her toes and planted a soft kiss on Murphy’s lips, “just as much as I need him.”

It took them a couple of more hours to hear a baby crying. It was like something had been lit inside of them, both of them running towards the sound as fast as they could.

Carol almost started crying again when she busted through the trees to see the three girls looking panicked at the two approaching walkers, Mika pointing a gun at them with shaky hands. She had no eyes, for anyone but the girls. And Murphy had no eyes, other than for her, so while she ran to grab the crying Judith from Lizzie’s arms, Murphy took care of the two walkers coming in with two shots to the head.

Mika threw herself into him as soon as the two walkers dropped. The little girl was sobbing into his stomach, as she hugged herself to him. Murphy put an arm around her small shoulders, using his free hand to grab the gun from her hands, put the safety as he tried to calm her down as he looked around them.

Carol had been able to calm the crying baby, but the ruckus would bring more walkers towards them. They needed to get out of here. Now.

“Who is with you?” Murphy softly asked Lizzie, as Carol continued to bounce the baby while making shushing noises.

“Ty took us out of the prison, he had to leave us because we heard some people screaming p ahead.”

Murphy looked down to a still crying Mika, only to look up and see Lizzie stand there, as if nothing was wrong. As if she had not been almost suffocating little Judith while trying to keep her quiet, while her little sister was trying her best at protecting them, like he had not just killed two walkers in front of her that would have ended them if they hadn’t arrived.

The look on Carol’s face, on the other side, was one of pre elation. She kept on kissing the top of Judith’s head, while muttering things to the baby that would only be between the two of them. He couldn’t say anything about Lizzie to her, at least not right then.

“Come on,” Murphy said as he crouched down in front of Mika, “no more tears, okay?”

The young girl gave him a nod, her big eyes still filled with tears, “we've got you.” Her arms went around his neck, and he couldn’t help but hug her back, pulling her up with him as he stood up once more.

She was ten years old, not too heavy and the fact that she had started to giggle instead of crying when her feet had left the ground for a couple of moments, made the pain in his ribs worth it.

“Is she okay?” Murphy asked Carol as he dropped Mika to the ground once again, opening his arm to let Carol get closer to him so he could look down at Judith.

“She was just scared, she’s okay, aren’t you Judy?” Murphy smiled as he looked down at Carol who in turn was looking at Judith. They had found her girls, and they were alive.

Now they only had to find the rest of her boys.

Murphy stayed on the back of the group, keeping his three girls in front of him at all times. The sound of shuffling and moaning getting further away as they got closer to the direction where Tyreese had apparently gone to.

They finally reached the end of the woods, finding themselves in front of some railways. Murphy raised his gun as he saw Tyreese slam his hammer to a walker’s head, once and again, not knowing if there were more of them. Or if Tyreese had any idea of what his family had been involved with.

It was just their luck that the one person he would rather not find after what he had learnt last night, was the first one they did.

“Tyreese!” He tensed as Carol called him over, feeling as Mika leaned on his side where he was standing by Carol as she watched the dead walkers around them.

He saw the look of complete bewilderment on Tyreese face, before he broke into a trot to reach them. He had no idea of how Tyreese was mentally, but he automatically placed himself between him and Carol as he made for her.

“Hey,” Tyreese said softly as he put a hand on Carol’s shoulder, giving her a squeeze before patting Murphy’s. “How? How did you find us? How did you get out? How?”

“We saw Judith’s blanket-“

A high pitched scream of anguish interrupted their explanation, the five of them turning to look as the man that Tyreese had been unable to save dropped on his knees in the middle of the dead bodies of his group.

“Stay here, girls.” Murphy said as he pushed past all of them, and moved towards the man. He knew Carol was at his back, and he also knew that there were no words that would keep her away from him. He was fine with having her at his side, always.

“Stay on the tracks…” Murphy looked at the man as he looked up at them, “that was my mistake.”

“The woods have more cover,” Carol said from a step behind him, his hand was on his knife as he looked warily at the bodies around them.

“No, you don’t understand.” The man seemed to have lost absolutely all the will to live, and Murphy felt like he knew what it felt. He had been that man yesterday; he had been that man when he had been running away from the walkers before almost run over by Carol. He would not pity that man; he would keep him in his prayers. “There’s a place, up the tracks. It’s safe, you can’t take the children there.”

Murphy turned and looked at Carol. It could be a possibility, they still needed to look of Daryl but a safe place for the girls? That was something they needed before being able to set on their quest.

“Trust me.” The man’s broken voice sent a jolt through Murphy, as he nodded his agreement to the silent question Carol was making him. “Please, follow the tracks.”

Murphy nodded, before turning and ushering Carol and Tyreese back towards the girls, and towards the direction the man had pointed.  The girls looked at them once they reached them, following Tyreese signals when he motioned them to hurry along the tracks.

“Wait a second, love.” Murphy gave Carol a sad smile before he jogged back to the broken man, going to one knee in front of him as he reached him.

“Did you see someone that looked like me?” The man shook his head, clearly being overwhelmed by grief.

“What?”

“Did you see someone that looked exactly like me?”

Murphy closed his eyes, dropping his head as the man shook his head. “Do you want me to stay with you?” He asked softly, as he looked up at the man from behind the hair that had fallen over his eyes.

“Follow the tracks, don’t let your family suffer for your mistakes like mine did.”

“Good will welcome you in his kingdom with his arms wide open, as a father welcomes a long lost son.” The man gave Murphy a watery smile, before Murphy got on his feet and ran back towards where Carol, Tyreese and the girls were waiting for him.

With a last look over his shoulder, Murphy threw an arm around Carol’s shoulders smiling softly at Mika as she grabbed his hand as the six of them started to make their way towards the unknown. At least he hoped it was a safe one. 

They walked until they couldn’t walk anymore, and then they walked some more. Always over the tracks, always looking for a sign of life from anyone they knew. Always looking for Daryl. 

-.-.-.

Daryl looked warily around them, he sighed when he recognized where they were. While chasing Beth through the night, they had gotten even further away from where they needed to go. He should have just grabbed her by the waist, thrown her over his shoulder and started walking towards the cabin.

He didn’t do that, because he understood that she was a grieving kid, but if they got even further away from the route that would take them the closest to the shack once again, he was going to scream at her.

He was probably going to scream at them both if they didn’t stop yapping at each other like those fucking miniature dogs that he hated so much. He sighed as he looked around once again to the woods around them.

He would never be able to catch them some food if they didn’t stop talking, he would probably threaten to put a bolt into either one of them at this moment if they didn’t stop talking.

They were probably four or five hours behind where he had hoped them to be. They were at least ten miles out from where he needed them to be.

And yet, they would not stop arguing.

“You’re nothing but a stupid little boy that likes to hide behind Daryl’s shirt tails and pretend you have any idea of what you’re doing.”

“Well, you’re nothing else but a spoiled little brat that expects everyone to just do as you say!”

“I hate you!”

“Good!”

Daryl sighed as the two of them finally shut up, leaving him in the middle of the two teenagers. But at least they weren’t talking.

He hadn’t been able to find any tracks from his brothers; he had been looking for the way he knew Connor put more weight on his left leg than the right because of his bad knee.  Or how Murphy tended to lean towards the inside just like his did… and there hasn’t been anything that made him think that they were on the right track.

He couldn’t let that get him down. He couldn’t allow himself to think that they weren’t alive. He just couldn’t even toy with that idea.

He looked at the sky, basing himself on the sun’s position he started guiding them to where they had supposed to be going from the beginning.

He couldn’t help but let some hope take hold of his heart, hope that when they finally made it to the cabin one, or both, of his brothers were already there. That they would be waiting for him and ready to go look for Carol.

They had found the cabin in one of the few overnight hunts the three of them had gone together. A hunt that had ended up with the three of them boarding themselves inside, with enough moonshine to get them stupid and hangover by the next morning. Carol had laughed at their faces when they had arrived back the next day with no game, and with the three looking greener than Kermit the frog.

He sighed once again when Beth started to annoy Zach into talking. He was really going to kick both of their asses by the end of the day if they didn’t shut up.

They gave him a respite for two hours, silently following him as he guided them through the woods. They barely met any walkers, and he was unsure if that was good or not. That had to mean they were getting together somewhere, and he really didn’t want to think about where.

“Daryl, could you please tell Zach how we will never find anyone if he keeps on getting in front of you and stomping his way through any possible tracks we find?” Beth’s voice just made Daryl clench his jaw in exasperation.

He hated teenagers.

“Daryl, could you tell Beth that she has no idea of what even real tracks look like?”

“Well, can you tell Zach that he’s stupid and he’s not even that good looking?”

“Daryl, can you-“

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” Daryl yelled, chest heaving as he watched as the two teenagers looked at each other before looking at him. Beth looked scared, while Zach was smart enough to actually look chastised for once.

“You two will follow me, and you will keep your fucking traps shut.”

“But-“Daryl shook his head as Beth opened her mouth to talk back.

“No, not a word.” He knew he was glaring at them both, and he had been told by Carol more than once how scary his glare was. He did not give a fuck right then if he was scaring them or not. “We will spread out, only say anything if you see something that might lead us to the others. If it’s not that, I don’t want to hear it.”

He didn’t say anything else, stalking away from the two of them. With his luck, that would keep them silent for only a couple of hours, before they started yapping at each other once again.

He got three hours. That’s how long his peace and quiet lasted before it was broken. And for once, he wasn’t that disappointed in that fact.

He crouched down, the remains of a fire had caught his attention as he pushed some leaves from some foot print. Now they were getting somewhere.

He could feel Beth breathing over his neck as she tried to look at what he was looking. “They could be Molly’s or Luke’s, this means they’re alive.”

“They were alive four or five hours ago,” Daryl grumbled as he tried not to groan as he got to his feet from where he was crouching. His knees were starting to ache, along with his bad shoulder. Everything ached these days it seemed.

“Daryl!” Zach’s voice brought him out of his musings, as the boy was crouching over something a few yards ahead of them In the same position he had found himself not so long ago.

Daryl felt like his chest couldn’t get enough air as he looked down at the prints Zach was proudly showing him. There were two set of prints, ones smaller than the others. The bigger ones were prints he knew.

“Son of a bitch,” Daryl muttered as he closed his eyes, before raising his head towards the sky. He knew he was not making any sense to the kids, but he didn’t care at that moment. He had caught Murphy’s trail. Murphy was alive and he was just a couple of hours ahead of them. He would catch up with them.

He would find his brother today. And the best news, his brother wasn’t alone. The other prints were smaller, familiar, but he knew he was probably just projecting what he wanted to see in them. There was no way Carol was with Murphy, not after having left back by Rick. It was probably a female, or maybe Carl; probably Carl knowing Murphy.

“Daryl?” Zach said softly, as Beth looked warily at him. She had learnt her lesson from the night before, not attempting to touch him this time around.

“They’re Murphy, they’re two hours ahead, at the most.”

With renew fervor, the three of them followed the tracks. Daryl would feel slight panic whenever they lost them for a few yards, feeling like his heart was going to stop only to restart when they either find Murphy’s or the kids’ tracks. They were never one where the other wasn’t that far behind.

Daryl shook his head as the three stopped for a moment to take a breather, he would have never thought that Murphy would be able to track as he was doing. Because it was clear for him that his brother hadn’t been with the group, that him and whoever that was with him were following the group with the kids.

He just hoped they weren’t too late.

They reached a part of the woods with a lot of grapevines, only for him to notice that some were stomped over. “They picked up the pace right here, they left in a hurry.”

“Things went wrong?” Zach asked.

Daryl nodded, looking around searching for Murphy’s prints.

“Wouldn’t kill both of you to have a little faith.” Beth said, as she looked around.

Zach snorted, shaking his head as he did his part.

“Faith-“ Daryl stopped talking for a moment, as he took two long steps towards some disturbed leaves under a tree. “Faith it’s my brothers’ and Carol’s thing,” he crouched down, shaking his head as he recognized the two set of steps entwining together. They were so close that he was sure that someone else that was less good than him at tracking, would not have been able to tell the difference. But it was him. “But for once,” he said the words softly as he put a hand against the trunk of the tree and let him take some of his weight. “Faith is exactly what we need to get through.”

He took a deep breath, rising tall with it. “Murphy and Carol went this way; we’re gaining up on them. Let’s go.”

They followed him, and he followed the tracks. Now that he knew for sure that they were Carol’s footprints, he could see it clearly. How there were moments when they were probably holding hands since they were closer than they probably would have been if they weren’t, how Murphy seemed to need to stop every so often and Carol would wait for him.

He could see the exact moment when they started to run.

He said nothing, he only started following the trail as close as he could. He felt the world swirl around him as they arrived to the clearing. It felt like he had been kicked in the stomach and he couldn’t breathe. Like his heart had been ripped from his chest.

There were two dead walkers, and there were footsteps of a herd all over the place. There was nothing left.

If Carol and Murphy had been there, he had no way of telling what way they had gone to. He had lost them, again.

“Fuck!” Daryl yelled, not caring who he would attract as he turned and slammed his fist against the closer tree. “Fuck!” His voice broke as he hit the tree again, “fuck.”

“Daryl-“

“Zach!” The two of them turned around, weapons up, to see Beth try to get away from a walker that had crept up on them.

“Come on!” Daryl said, as he tried to take a shot but was unable to do so because of fear of hitting Beth. Quickly, he jumped the walker, grabbing him on a hold leaving it open for Zach to use his knife and slam it into the walker’s head.

Daryl pushed the body away from him and stayed down for a moment, breathing hard. He had lost them; the trail was lost but he needed to be able to find them again. He had to. He couldn’t give up that easily, his hand throbbed where he had hit the tree with; and Carol would probably scold him for losing his temper so easily anyway.

He needed to get his ass off the ground, and find the trail again.

 They followed the trail of the walkers down to some train tracks, Daryl watched from the slight slope as there were some walkers too busy with someone’s remains to care about them.

“I’ll take care of them,” Zach murmured softly as the three of them started to make their way down the slope. It had been a carnage, with three walkers festing in the remains of the former living.

“No.” Daryl said as he raised his crossbow, shooting down the first bolt. “We need to save the ammo.”

Zach watched as Daryl reloaded, and hit the second walker. The third one staggered onto its feet, as Daryl reloaded with them at a safe distance. The third walker dropped soon after.

Daryl recovered pulled the bolts with a little too much force, all the anger inside him just simmering under the surface. He looked to one side, the to the other.

They probably went over the rail tracks, and if they did. It would be almost impossible for him to track them.

He didn’t even notice anything amiss as he walked towards one side of the tracks, until he heard Beth’s breathe hitch.

“Come on, Beth,” Zach said softly as he moved to pull Beth away from what Daryl finally saw was a bloody baby shoe. “We need to move.”

Daryl had to avert his eyes. He couldn’t let his feelings take over him, because if he did, if he let the despair fill him at least once. He would never be able to function. And he needed to function.

“I don’t see any prints; the walkers were all around this place.” Daryl walked to one side for a few feet, then went back towards the other. “There’s a shack a good way from here, that way, my brothers know that we’re supposed to meet there.”

He started to walk towards the general direction of the old shack. Expecting the kids to follow him. He gave them their space, he needed his too.

He kept his eyes open in case he saw anything to indicate his brother hadn’t fucked up and taken the other path. There was nothing.

They barely said a word for the rest of the day.

.-.-.-

When Connor woke up, he realized he had never actually left the bathroom the night before. The crick on his neck he got from sleeping inside the bathtub was worth it from having escaped being stuck inside with Rick Grimes all night.

With a groan he got out of the tub, hearing his back pop as he stretched. He inspected the ugly bump he had on the side of his head, hissing when it still was tender to the touch. So far, the dizziness seemed to have abide completely, he just hoped it stayed that way.

When he walked back into the front too, Rick was still sleeping his chest barely moving up and down with every breath. Connor approached him, checking his pulse sighing in relief when he found it strong. It wasn’t like Connor was expecting anything less, the man after all did looked like death warmed over but he wasn’t sure they should stay in that house another day.  But it was clear that Rick wasn’t going to be able to move on yet as much as he hated that.

He didn’t want to stay in that house another day.

He had no idea where they were, in the general speaking way. He knew the town, he had been in that town, but his head still felt fuzzy when he tried to think too hard about where they were geographically.

They needed to make their way to the north east. That he knew. Daryl, Murphy and him had found an old shack filled with moonshine a couple of months ago, it had been an amazing bonding experience for the three of them, and it had become their unofficial meet point if anything was to happen.

At least he hoped he got that right, and it wasn’t just another alcohol induced memory from that afternoon. They had not caught a thing in their ‘hunting’ trip other than a hell of a hangover. A hangover that Carol had enjoyed way too much if his mind didn’t betray him.

“Carl?” Connor asked softly, as he moved towards the kitchen, before walking towards the dining room without finding any clue of where the boy was. “Carl?”

Silence was his only answer.

He was wondering between going upstairs or looking outside when the first shot ran out. He didn’t wait for the next one to rang out. Connor was running outside when a second shot was heard, helping him to tell where they were coming from.

He didn’t dare to yell for the kid in case, just in case, he wasn’t involved with this. His gut was telling him something else, but he still had hope. That was all he had nowadays.

He saw the walker pull back a little bit as the third, fourth and then final shot went through him. The silence afterwards only broken by the heavy breathing of the kid that was now under the pile of walker.

“For fucks sake, Carl,” Connor said angrily as he started to pull bodies from over him, practically pulling the boy up on his own before crushing him into his arms. “What the fuck, lad?”

Carl’s hat had fallen from the roughness of Connor’s ‘help’, but the boy hadn’t seemed to notice. He was clinging onto Connor as much as Connor was clinging onto him.

“Why, Carl? Why?”

“They were scratching at the door, I was just going to lead them away…” Carl pulled back, his breathing a little labored but certainly looking and feeling more calm than Connor was at that moment. “I took care of them.”

“And you almost gave me a heart attack while taking ‘care of them’.” Connor pulled Carl’s hat from the floor, putting it on the boy’s head. “What would I tell Murphy if you had gotten killed while doing that? He would kick my ass for sure, he’s kind of fond of you.”

“Sorry,” Carl muttered as he let Connor put a hand on the back of his neck and start leading him away from the three dead walkers. “But you were taking a nap in the tub, it’s not my fault.”

“Shut your gob.” Carl chuckled softly as Connor shook him a little bit. “Let’s go check on your old man, before we go and scavenge some of those houses.”

“I don’t want to.” Connor let his head drop as he stop as soon as Carl started digging his heels in to keep them from going any further, “Let’s go look at some of those houses.” He had started to try and walk away from Connor, pulling forcefully when the older man didn’t allow him to move far.

“Come on, lad, let’s go check on your pa, and then we’ll go.”

“I don’t care.”

“Yes, you do,” Connor said leaning forward and dropping his head so he could look at Carl in the eyes, “he’s our dad, of course you do.”

“I don’t need him!” Connor straighten up as Carl’s voice resounded across the empty street. “I didn’t forget how to survive just because he had us playing farm!”

“Carl…” Connor looked around, as if expecting that more than one walker could just stumble their way after hearing the boy’s loud voice.

“I save him!” Carl yelled pointing at the house where his father was passed out at, before pointing at Connor. “I saved you!”

Connor nodded, “you did.”

“I don’t need him anymore; I don’t need to be protected.” Carl’s voice was back to a normal volume, and he took a step closer to Connor. “I don’t need you to look after me just because we lost Murphy.”

“What the fuck, Carl?” Connor took a step closer to the boy, “what the fuck are you talking about?”

“HE LET THEM ALL DIE!” Connor saw as raw pain took over Carl, his voice breaking as he yelled at him. But he knew, it was not really him he was yelling at. “THAT’S WHY WE LOST JUDITH!”

“Carl, lad-“

“And Hershel, Andrea, Glenn, Maggie…” Carl’s eyes finally went back to Connor’s. “Daryl, Murphy, and Carol….” Connor saw as the tears that the boy had seemed to be holding started to fall down his cheeks. “Or my mom.”

“They’re all gone now, because of him!”

Connor moved, and before Carl could react, he had his arms around his thin shoulders and was pushing him into his chest. He felt as the boy started to break down in his arms, his slim long arms moving and grasping the back of Connor’s shirt as he continued to sob into his chest. Carl continued to said things in between sobs, but for Connor they all sounded like gibberish. The boy was hurting, the boy needed his father.

And yet again, his father was not there for him.

After a few minutes Carl pushed him away, and Connor let him. The boy’s eyes were still red rimmed, his breathing labored… but he did look a little less tense.

“Carl,” Connor said softly as he put both hands on his shoulders looking into his eyes. “I’m sure they’re not all gone, we’re going to find them again, we have to believe that.”

“How can you say that?” Carl said in disbelief as he cocked his head in wonder, he was looking at Connor like he was saying nonsense. “They’re all dead.”

“I refuse to believe that.” Carl looked in amazement at him as he spoke, “I know it in my heart that Murphy, Daryl and Carol out there, I know it in my heart.”

“They’re dead.” Carl’s voice was soft, barely above a whisper.

“They’re not, and when we find them, I’m going to tell Murphy that you told on him and he’s going to kick your ass.”

“You wouldn’t.” Connor chuckled and without saying anything else, he started to make his way back to the house.

“I’m still mad at him.” Carl muttered as he trotted a few moments later to walk at his side. Connor just smirked at him.

“Join the club.”

Carl was mourning what they had lost, but at least he was there. Who knows what would have happened if it had just been him and his father. Who knows if Rick was actually going to make it through the night at the pace he was recovering.

He was still passed out right where they left him, pulse strong but unresponsive. Carl was tense around him, and Connor quickly ushered him outside. They really didn’t need another shouting match in the middle of nowhere calling walkers to them. The had a limited number of bullets after all.

Connor let Carl choose the house they would scavenge as the two of them walked silently through the streets of the town. “It was the second time you said you knew they were alive, how can you know?”

Carl’s tone of voice was not judgmental, it was curious. Connor didn’t say anything at first, thinking his words before he spoke them as they walked in the middle of the road to the yet unknown location.

“I just do.” Connor smirked as he felt Carl’s eyes on his face, elbowing the boy throwing him off balance for a moment. “It’s one of those weird dizygotic triplets bullshit that Carol teases us all the time about. I just know.”

“And Carol?”

Connor laughed at that, throwing the arm around Carl’s shoulders and pulling him close. “That woman is a force of nature, mark my words lad, she’s the toughest of us all.”

Carl didn’t say anything, only pointing at the house they were walking by.

“That one?” Connor asked, as he made a face as he looked the two of them stood in front of the house.

“Yep.”

“Are you sure?” Carl couldn’t help but smile a little as Connor’s accent made his voice sound a little higher at that word.

“Yep.”

“Looks like something out a fucking catalogue,” Connor muttered as he walked in front of Carl towards the house. “Get that,” he muttered to Carl as he noticed the long spikes the garden lights were on.

“Wait.” Carl said as Connor approached the door, ready to kick it open. “I want to try that.”

“You want to open that door?”

Carl nodded. Connor was trying not to let his amusement show as he made a motion with his arm for Carl to go ahead, as he stepped to the side. Crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back on the wooden pillar on the porch.

He watched as the boy looked at the door, taking a deep breath, jumping a little on his toes… before he slammed himself into the door getting bounced back into the floor for all this effort.

The glare he was on the receiving end as he busted out laughing, from Carl as he was sprawled on the porch floor would have made more than one-person tremble. Connor just laughed harder.

“Dammit.”

That just set him off again. Carl stood up from the floor, dusting off his pants as soon as he was standing. It had hurt, but Connor was finally started to calm down and he just knew that if he saw him grimacing he would start laughing again.

“Look lad,” Connor said, still chuckling once in awhile as he approached Carl pointing at the door. “What you have to do, if you really want to open a door like this one?” Connor approached the door, and pointed at the doorknob “is you want to kick it as close to the knob as you can, it’s going to take the least amount of force and as long as you don’t kick the knob itself it’s going to be the easiest to open.”

Carl frowned, looking attentively as Connor took a couple of steps back. It was probably a third of the space Carl had taken before his failed attempt.

“If there were any walkers, they will probably have heard your ‘attempt’” Connor chuckled as Carl glared at him when he used finger quotes. “So be ready, we don’t use any more ammo if we can.”

Carl nodded, knowing that he had used five rounds that morning alone and they sure didn’t have a big supply at hand. He grabbed the pike harder, nodding to Connor to let him know he was ready.

Connor kick opened the door at once. And no one was there to greet them. They cleared the common areas on the ground floor first. Both of them had their guns drawn, and neither of them needed to use them. The owners had seemed to have left in a hurry, but generally the house was in a good state.

The jackpot was the kitchen.

“I’m starving,” Connor said as he started to shove cans into the bag he had grabbed from the living room, it was one of those huge designer purses that had been so ‘in’ just before the world ended. It probably would have cost more than him and Murphy won over a year at the meat packer. He was going to enjoy using it for something like this.

“Nice purse.” Carl said laughing as he started putting some cookie packages into his white bag.

“It clashes horribly with my complexion, but what can we –“

Connor tense immediately, his hand going to the gun in his belt when Carl grabbed his arm in a dead grip. He followed the boy’s eyes to where he was looking baffled.

“Sweet Mary, Mother of God.”

They shared a smile as Connor helped Carl get onto the counter to get the huge chocolate pudding can that probably was being saved for a special occasion. This was their special occasion. The smile on Carl’s face as he looked down to him from where he was standing on top of the counter was blinding and Connor couldn’t help but return it as brightly.

“I guess we just found our lunch.”

Carl was still smiling as he jumped from the counter. They finish scavenging the pantry filling up both Connor’s purse and Carl’s bag to the brim with canned goods before dropping them by the door.

“High or low?” Connor murmured as he looked at both the stairs taking them to the second floor, as well as the door that took them down to the basement.

“You go low, I go high?” Carl said, not looking at Connor as he gripped the metal spike back in his hand once again.

“Think again, Buck.” Connor patted his back, “not leaving you to almost get eaten once again.”

Carl huffed, and Connor couldn’t help but ask for forgiveness to his late mother. He couldn’t help but think that if one teenager boy was hard, the two of them together must have been a nightmare.

Carl shrugged him off, starting to walk towards the door leading them to the basement. In two quick strides, Connor was by the door with his hand on the knob before Carl could take it. He shot a look over his shoulder at Carl, and opened the door.

The basement was silent and dark, two things that before the walkers roamed the earth Connor would have appreciated from a place like this. Now, now it just freaked him out slightly.

Old habits are hard to break, and as he always did with Murphy, Connor started walking down the stairs first. His attention was in his surroundings, in every noise the steps made as he went, trying to look in the shadows using the meager light that entered through the small window in one of the sides.

He was so used to having his brothers at his back, he was so used to not having to say anything all the time and just knowing where everyone was; that when the first shot rang out, he threw himself over the absent body of one of his brothers as a reaction to it.

It took Connor a second to realize what had happened, that he was alone in the basement. And the shot could only have come from one person. Carl.

He ran up the stairs, cursing when he missed a step and ended up bracing his hands on the top of the stairs to keep himself from getting a second concussion in less than twenty-four hours. He couldn’t stop and think about the pain in his knee, or anything else but the need to get to where the shots had been fired.

The image that he saw the moment he got to the top of the stairs was one he never wanted to see again in his life. The walker had Carl on his back, with the boy’s panicking as he kept on trying to kick it away from him. Without saying anything, Connor jumped over the crap that was littered all over the floor and drop himself over the walker, slamming his knife into the back of its head.

Connor didn’t even give Carl any time to catch his breath. He was up two seconds after the walker was finally down, grabbing the boy by the front of his shirt and getting him off the floor at once.”

“Are you alright?” Connor was leaning down, looking at Carl as he ran a quick check up on the boy. “Did it bit you?”

Carl who was still breathing hard, only shook his head in negative.

And that was the moment where all his worry, turned into anger.

“What the fuck did you think you were fucking doing?” Connor yelled at Carl as he took a step back, tripping over the dead walker and crashing into the floor. Carl made a motion as if to help him up which Connor dismissed with a glare. “Fucker,” Connor muttered as kicked the walker while crawling back to be able to get up.

“I can take care of myself.”

“And what about MY back? You were supposed to be taking care of my back.”

Carl looked away while Connor grabbed onto something to get himself up again. His bad knee hurt, but there were more pressing matters.

“You keep asking, no-“ Connor stopped talking to take a breath, trying to calm down his frayed nerves, “you keep demanding to be treated like an adult, but then you turn around and pull this shit?”

“Connor-“

“I was expecting you to be at my back, something I do not trust no one but my brothers and my wife to be, and then I turn around and you’re not there?” Connor knew that he was being too harsh on the boy, and that was the thing, he was a boy. But there were just so many things running through his head, so many fears that as much as he tried to stay positive, to believe, he felt like they were starting to slip away.

“You can do that shit, Carl, especially if you want us to trust you.” Connor’s chest was heaving, but he had started to feel as he was starting to calm down. “If you want us to trust you, you have to trust us to know better.”

“But you don’t always know better!” Carl’s rage exploded at those words, and Connor couldn’t help but take a step back as the boy’s lanky arms shot open. “My dad thinks he knows better than anyone and what had that gotten us! He got my mom killed, Hershel, Andrea! Probably Carol and Murphy and Daryl too!”

“Carl, stop.”

“He gave up! My dad gave up looking for the governor, Daryl gave up looking for him too! And we lost them! We lost everything!”

“Carl.” There was no stopping the teenager now, and Connor could see how he was finally having the breakdown he had really needed. He wished Murphy was here instead of him, he just wished Murphy was here.

“And now? I’m all alone! I lost Judy! I lost my mother’s photo! I can barely remember what she sounded like, now.”

“It’s okay, Carl. It’s okay to be mad, it’s okay to hate everything a little bit.” Connor made sure his voice was low and soothing. “But you have to be careful lad, I could have lost you twice today already. I don’t have my brothers, I don’t have Carol, I can’t lose you too.”

Carl took a deep breath, before nodding and jumping over the body of the walker to give Connor a hug. Connor accepted it, raising his eyes to the skies. He just hoped his brothers were doing better than him.

“Come on,” Connor muttered as he pushed Carl in front of him, stepping over the walker as they made their way downstairs.

The boy needed his father to be okay, they both needed something to cheer them up.

They had a huge can of pudding for that.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you guys. Thanks for reading!


	9. Still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know... the next chapter was supposed to be 'claimed' but I started writing Daryl's journey only to realize that 'Still' actually only happened during one day.... so I just finished it. Next chapter will show us where Murphy/Carol and Connor are at this point. Hope you guys enjoy the first out of two 'bottle' chapters in this story.

**Chapter IX**

**Still**

  
  


He had lost their trail. They had followed the rail tracks, and he had looked everywhere. They had even gone back more than once, with him leaving Zach and Beth on the tracks at time to go look for trails that looked promising.

He had lost them.

The feeling of helplessness that he hadn’t felt probably since Sophia, was once again making a home in his chest. He had been so close to them; he had unconsciously thought of what he was going to do when he saw them. Of what his first words to Carol would be. Of how he was going to hug his brother and her and not let go in a good while.

He had gotten way ahead of himself.

Silence had finally prevailed within their little group; he didn’t know if it was because Zach had to practically carry Beth away from the remains of the people they had seen by the tracks. They had talked in whispers as he tracked, and they had kept their bickering to themselves for the rest of the day.

A rest of the day that was spent following ghosts.

He threw another piece of dry wood into the fire in front of them, his eyes focused on the flames as the two kids slept around him. He had been two, maybe three hours, behind Murphy and Carol. Maybe if he hadn’t allowed Beth and Zach to wander aimlessly during the night they wouldn’t have missed them. Maybe if he had payed more attention, or if they hadn’t taken all those damn breaks that Zach kept on making them take to drink water…

There were too many what ifs.

What if he never finds them again? what if something happened and they were gone? What if he never gets a chance to tell them he loves them? What if Carol never knows how much she means to him, that she’s the only woman ever that have make him feel like this?

He felt as his throat started closing, knowing that it was the first sign of the tears threatening to make an appearance. His breathing was catching, and he was sure he was about to start sobbing like a little kid when he heard the first moans.

He had been too preoccupied with his feelings that he heard them when they were almost upon them.

“Beth!” Zach!” Daryl was pushing them up and ahead of him while they were still half asleep. Their instincts taking over and starting to stumble away from the herd chasing them and into the dark woods.

“Come on!” Daryl  pushed them forward looking back to see some of the walkers stop and stare at their fire, letting them get a head start. His eyes were tired, his vision blurry, but it was enough to see that it was a herd bigger than they could defend themselves against.

They would have to run.

With Zach on point, and him watching their back. They ran away from the walkers, but it wasn’t enough. They were still being chased. Daryl looked warily to the tall bush Zach had lead them to, but pushed past the two kids and ran through them first. Only to ran smack into a car in the middle of a road.

Without having to say anything, Zach and Beth moved to see if the car started, while he stood guard. The sound of walkers was getting closer and closer, and he wasn’t sure if they would be able to outrun them.

Daryl looked at the car, looking at the big trunk just as Beth turned on the key. He knew the car would not start before the frustrated grunt of the girl reached his ears.

“Zach!” Daryl was glad the boy was with him, he knew him, and because of that there was no need for a lot of words between them. Daryl pointed to the trunk, and watched as Zach ushered Beth first, before he himself climbed in.

Daryl sighed, looking at the cramped space with the two teenagers before looking at the woods again. It wasn’t like Carol; it wasn’t that he didn’t like tight spaces. He just didn’t like touching people that wasn’t his people.

When the next groan was heard, he gave Zach his crossbow before climbing into the trunk of the car. Grunting he pulled out his cloth from his pants, and used it to knot the trunk and keep it from opening.

He barely finished doing that when the shadow of the first walker appeared.

Daryl turned to look first at Beth, who was probably in the safest place possible. Zach had pushed her to the back, her head was on the opposite side that his and Zach’s. She looked terrified, but thankfully Zach was next to him. The two of them were holding hands, grasping at each other like they were each other’s anchors.

He knew the feeling.

The herd continued to pass around them. The smell of rotting corpse filled their space and he was sure he was going to hurl. He had spent a lot of time around the walkers, but he would never get used to the smell.

He moved his crossbow a little, wincing when he felt as it hit Zach on the side of the head. The place was cramped after all and the boy was lying right next to him. Daryl continued to watch through the small opening, his crossbow ready in case one of them got an idea of them being there.

It felt like hours that he spent in that position. His arms cramped, as did his back.

“Park Ranger.” Daryl startled from his musings, jumping slightly hitting his head on the trunk. He glared at Zach from the corner of his eye as the two of them waited to see if any of the walkers noticed the sound.

They didn’t.

“You know a lot about trails, and about finding people in the woods.” Daryl felt a pang in his heart as Zach continued to whisper in his ear. He wasn’t that good at finding people, he had lost Murphy and Carol after all.

Daryl didn’t answer. Instead he tried to change the positioning of his crossbow to let his arms rest for a moment. He wasn’t sure in what condition he was going to leave that trunk. He wasn’t a kid like the other two after all.

“Rest,” Zach said, pulling out his gun and pointing it towards the same place Daryl had been pointing his. At Daryl’s glare Zach returned it with one of his own. “You haven’t rested at all since the prison; I’m not willing to tell mama Carol you died because you’re a stubborn asshole.”

Daryl’s glare intensified, just before he lowered the bow. The kid was right, and using Carol’s name to get his point across worked like a magic. The little shit knew him too well. There was a deep tiredness all the way to his bones, he hadn’t gotten any sleep probably since the night before they got to the school and that was like 72 hours ago.

He felt Zach move, giving him a little more space to change positions relieving his back a little. His thoughts immediately went to the rest of his family, as he tried to block the sound of the moaning and shuffling right outside their hiding spot. Beth was gripping Zach’s leg, now that he had dropped her hand to point his rifle, her blue eyes wide open, terrified.

He was going to close his eyes for just a moment.

The next thing he knew was that he was being shaken awake by Zach, the trunk filled with considerably more light than the night before where only the moonlight gave them a sense of where they were. There was nothing but silence outside.

“It’s been about half an hour,” Zach said softly, groaning as he stretched as much as he could in the tight space. “Haven’t heard another one.”

“Let’s go,” Daryl grumbled as he undid the knot he had tied, crossbow up as he pushed the trunk open.

His knees cracked, as well as his back as he got out of the trunk. Everything hurt, the light making his eyes water, but he kept his crossbow up in case there was any walkers still around. He looked around them, it looked like a stampede had gone through. One or two dead bodies littered the area.

“Let’s grab anything that we can use…” Daryl finally turned to look at them from where he had been watching the opposite direction. “Zach.”

The boy nodded at the boy, and he started working on the car. The three of them worked silently, no need for words since both him and Zach knew what exactly what they needed. And Beth, Beth just followed their lead.

The night had been long, and no one had gotten any real rest. Daryl had no idea for how long he had passed out, feeling guilty for leaving the two kids on their own for those hours. They found some bags, and just threw everything inside.

Once done, Daryl looked at the two kids. As Zach moved to grab Beth’s hand, Daryl felt his eyes start to sting. He could not stand to look at them for a moment, so he turned his back to them and started walking away. He couldn’t think about it right then, he missed her hand in his, he missed his brothers’ arms around his shoulders.

He walked away.

And they followed.

His only hope now was that they had thought of making their way to the shack. Daryl squinted his eyes as he looked up to the sun, sighing as he turned to walk into the woods. It had been almost thirty-six hours since the prison had fallen. It was almost thirty-six hours since he had seen Murphy and Connor.

He shook his head as he raised his crossbow. He needed to feed those kids, he was not willing to face Carol’s wrath if any of them died of either dehydration or pass out because of lack of food. He smirked when a squirrel started to run down a tree, squinting his eyes as he prepared to shoot.

Daryl waited a beat, letting the bolt fly only for it to embed itself into the trunk of the tree. The squirrel scurrying away from his sight. “For fucks sake.” Daryl muttered to himself as he walked to get the bolt out of the tree. He sighed, resting his forehead against the tree, he was even using the same accent tilt that Murphy used.

The bolt was done for, splintered in the middle. Daryl sighed as he broke it in full before walking back towards where he had last seen Beth and Zach sitting. The two of them had basically begged for a rest, and he had relented.

The rattlesnake that he had found on the way back had more meat that the squirrel, and in the end no one needed to know about his little shooting problem. Connor above everyone would have gotten a laugh out if his inability to shoot straight.

Daryl looked over his shoulder as he was skinning the snake, the unmoving tail making noise with every pull of the skin.

“Is that a rattlesnake?” Daryl sometimes wonder how overprotected Zach had been as a kid, since more than once the boy had seemed overly excited by something that had been extremely common for him at that age.

Daryl grunted his answer, and looked over to see Beth looking pale as Zach grabbed the end of the skin and pulled until he could get the rattle away.

“You can cut that and keep it,” Daryl murmured as he inspected the pieces of meat. “It won’t go bad.” He passed his knife to Zach, watching as the boy cut the rattle away from the skin of the snake.

“But isn’t it poisonous?” Beth asked as she watched Daryl open the body in half, and start to get rid of the insides straight into a whole that Zach had dug just moments before.

“Snake is venomous, it means that if it bites you, you die.” Daryl did not look up from his work as he answered the girl, “we’ll die faster of lack of food than of eating a snake.”

“Unless he’s cooking it.” Daryl threw a small smile to the girl, as he pointed his knife to Zach, chuckling slightly as the boy made his disagreement obvious. The general feeling around them was a little lighter than the day before, and he was thankful for that.

The last thing he needed was to drag the other two down the same path he was going.

The three of them sat around the small fire that Beth had gotten started, watching as their food got cooked using the parts of his broken bolt as spears sitting around the fire. The snake tasted a little better than eating rubber, but it was juicy enough to quench some of the thirst that they were all feeling.

As well as to calm the rumbling in their stomachs.

Daryl should have known better, the two of them had been behaving accordingly. That wasn’t them.

“I need a drink.” Daryl threw his water bottle to Beth without looking up from his piece of meat. He had to be careful with all the small bones, he was not willing to die from a intestinal perforation.

“No, I mean a real drink.”

Daryl did look up at that, rolling his eyes at Beth before returning to his task at hand. “As in alcohol.”

He had his face smushed into the snake body as he looked up at the blond girl. She was deadly serious as she made eye contact with him, he just rolled his eyes again as he ignored her and continued eating.

“I never had one, because of my dad.”

“I got completely drunk for the first time when I was fourteen,” Zach said a bitter smile on his face as he looked at Beth from where he was sitting across the fire. “I drank because of my dad…” Zach scrunched up his nose, “and my mom.”

Daryl continued to eat, ignoring the two teenagers bonding over alcohol. He had been ten probably the first time he had drank until he passed out, and just like Zach, he had drank because of his father. But he was not going to tell the kids that, he had more important things to care about.

Like finding that shack, like getting the kids to safety. Like finding his brothers.

“I would like to find some.” Daryl continued eating without answering.

Zach was trying not to laugh at Beth, she was looking hopeful at Daryl without getting the reaction she was expecting. He inspected the archer sitting across him; he knew Daryl, and he knew the man had a plan. They were going somewhere, and Daryl would not let something like the need for a drink to derange them.

He had a purpose, and he knew what Daryl’s purpose probably was.

“Enjoy your snake jerky.”

“Beth, come on!” Zach yelled after the girl as she stomped away from the camp, having grabbed only the knife that Daryl had lent her. “Where are you going?”

Beth ignored him and continued walking.

“She’s going the wrong way.” Daryl muttered as he watched Beth continue walking away from them.

“Dude.” Zach said as he scrambled to grab his gun, getting on his feet.  Daryl just raised his snake jerky as if toasting him before he saw him run behind the girl. Daryl scoffed as he continued eating his meat, counting in his head as he did so.

After a minute and a half passed, he got on his feet. Bow in one hand, while he kept his meat on the other. And proceeded to follow them. He followed at a good distance, watching as the two of them continued to biker once Zach caught up with her.

He sighed as he threw away the last of the meat, raising his bow as he saw the group of walkers approach the two of them. He trusted Zach not to use the gun in the middle of the woods, there were four of them that in theory the two of them could easily take on.

He was planning on staying back, letting them make their own choices. The two of them needed to learn sometime. Who knew if he was going to be able to be with them for long.

He watched as Beth took a rock, throwing it as far as she could, sending the walkers towards the sound. He was impressed, she wasn’t as helpless after all.

Daryl stepped on a twig on purpose, enjoying a little bit as he watched the two kids jump. He didn’t say anything to them, turning on his back and starting on his way back to camp. He knew they would follow him.

“Beth,” Zach said softly as she pulled away from him once more, hurrying to follow Daryl.

“I’m pretty sure we left them behind,” she said to him as she kept her pace between the two men. “But I think we have to go that way to go find some alcohol.”

Daryl sighed as he jumped over their makeshift alarm, wincing as it rattled as Beth slammed into it.

“What the hell! You brought me back?!”

Daryl nodded, their meager belongings were there, their low food and water supply was there, there was nowhere else they could go but there.

“I’m not staying in this suck ass camp!”

Daryl could feel his temper rising, trying to breath and control it before he let it blow over. He could see Zach standing behind the pissed of Beth, the look on the boy’s face a mix between annoyance and anger. With whom? He was not exactly sure of that.

Beth turned, running smack into Zach who had been standing behind her. The boy only forced her to turn again, pushing her towards Daryl.

She chose then to unleash her anger on the one that had not said anything at all. She chose to unleash her anger on Daryl.

“What is wrong with you?” Beth screamed at him as she took a step closer to him, “Do you feel nothing?”

“Shut up,” Daryl sneered back at her.

“Yeah, you think everything is screwed, I guess that’s something.”

“Beth, shut up,” Zach said from behind her.

“And of course, you have your little puppy defending you! Screw that! Screw you!” She flipped Daryl off, getting even more mad as Daryl didn’t do anything but stare at her.

She turned on her heel, pushing Zach away not even batting an eye when the boy tripped and fell on his ass, as she stomped away from the two of them. Daryl watched her go, the beginnings of a headache making themselves present on his temples.

“Go after her, I’ll catch up.” He barked at Zach, turning and going to pick up what was useful of their ‘sucky’ camp.

He needed the time alone, he needed to think. He wasn’t doing nothing; he was making sure the two of them survived long enough for him to leave them in a safe place and get his brothers. He was doing the right thing, right?

He was sure of Zach’s abilities, so he took his time getting their things. At least this time she had gone in the right direction, getting them closer to the shack instead of further away.

The silence was both a blessing and a curse. He had filled one of the bags they had gotten from the car with the essentials, grabbing the rattle Zach had been playing with before he had to run after his girlfriend and pocketing it to give it to him later.

His mind wandered when he was alone, when the silence around him reminded him that  _ he _ was alone. Zach had Beth, and for the first time in his life he was dreading the idea of being on his own.He had spent most of his life longing for solitude, looking forward to the time he would get to spend in the woods on his own. He had craved it like a man in the deseret craved water… And now? Now as he made his way following the trail the two teenagers under his care had made, he loathed it.

He wanted to wake up in the middle of a human pile, where he wasn’t sure who was where, and with whom he was sharing air with. He wanted to have Carol’s slender arms hug him from behind as he looked over the prison. He wanted to have Murphy constant blabber in his ear as he would just not shut up. He wanted to Connor teasing him until he was sure there was no blood left on his body than the one making his skin so red he was sure he looked like a lobster.

He wanted the noise that came with his family. He never wanted to be alone anymore. Daryl rubbed his chest, where the tightness he knew was his anxiety seemed to be concentrating. He couldn’t let his anxiety win right then, he had a job to do.

He followed the tracks until they veered off to the old country club he had seen from afar with his brothers. They had said they would go back sometime later, he guessed this was his later. He looked around as he followed the clear prints the kids had left for him. He could take them to the shack by tonight.

By his calculations, they were probably the ones that had taken the longest trail that would have taken them to the shack from the prison. Beth’s little tantrum had cost them a few hours on that first day. And if Murphy and Carol had followed the train tracks, then they probably were at the shack by then.

They just had to be.

He had seen the walkers lingering around the front of the club from inside the woods, choosing not to follow the trail of the kids as he made his way away towards the back of the club. He rounded it, noticing how the front door was closed, scurrying towards the back.

He entered the country club, wincing at the smell inside. There had been people there, living for some time. The traces of life lived, and lost, all around them.

He slowly made his way inside, aiming his crossbow as he heard the moaning of walkers close to him. He could make them in the dark, walkers that had once been people. People that had decided to kill themselves over living in the world that they now had to live in.

Daryl looked around, finding a flashlight among all the littered things on the floor. He used it to light around him. The poor bastards hanging and trying to grab at him looked like they had never seen a hard day in their lives. They were wearing clothing and jewelry expected from someone in a place like this.

He felt nauseous, and not only because of the smell of the many corpses around him. But, there were no traces of Zach nor Beth. Daryl continue to light the space around him. He might hate everything this place stood for, but they needed things that would keep them alive.

And among the furs and expensive gowns they could yet find weapons. He looked down as his foot hit something, lighting down to see a bag filled with jewelry and cash. His first instinct was to grab it and run, to grab it, make sure no one saw him and run out of there.

He hadn’t realized he was kneeling until his hand first touched the cold jewelry. Then he felt anger, anger at that person that he had been back then. The person that would have forgotten everything around him just to have enough money for booze and to get Merle of his back.

The person he liked to believe he no longer was. He tipped the bag over, it was a good bag, leather, sturdy. He frowned when he looked as a ring dropped last as he shook the bag, the ring was silver color, with some small diamonds around the simple band. It was small, a women’s ring. He had no idea why, but he pocketed the ring, right next to Carol’s jasper stone.

He didn’t look twice at what he had dropped as he made his way across the room towards the double doors that were wide open. He looked over his shoulder as he heard walkers start trying to get in through the doors, and only hurried to close the doors behind him.

The kids couldn’t be that far away now.

He found their tracks easily, the place covered by a fine layer of dust. He threw things into his bag as he moved, toothpicks, some spices. Zach and Beth had clearly gone through before him, the marks of their loot obvious to someone paying attention.

He found the body of the walker as he made his way through the kitchen, nodding as he saw the mark of the knife he knew Beth was carrying on its forehead. The girl needed to be able to take care of herself, she no longer had her Daddy to hide behind.

The trail led him down the stairs, to the lower level. It was even darker down there, he sighed as knelt to crawl under a tipped over glass case, his knees creaking as he stood up again. He was getting too old for this shit.  And him and Murphy usually made fun of Connor because of his bad knee; he wasn’t that far behind his oldest brother.

He raised his crossbow once again as he turned a corner, lowering it the moment he found himself aiming at the back of Beth’s head.

“You two need to pay more attention.” Daryl couldn’t help but snort as he saw both Zach and Beth jump and turn to look at him. Zach at least had raised his rifle at him. He nodded to the boy as he started looking around them for anything they could use. The room was filled with uppity clothes perfect for those uppity bastards from upstairs.

He would rather stay in his disgusting clothes than change into any of those clean ones. Apparently, neither Beth nor Zach felt like him since both used the opportunity of having him watching their backs to change into clean preppy clothes.

He guessed both had been preppy kids some way or another.

“My mother used to come to a place like this,” Zach said as he moved to sit next to where Daryl had dropped himself as him and Beth changed. “Every Saturday you would find her with her friends here, while my father went to play a round or two of golf.”

Daryl didn’t say anything just raising his eyebrow at him. Zach chuckled, humorlessly. “I hated it, I hated that she would rather leave me with a nanny than spend time with me. I hated that the two of them barely talked to each other….” Zach shown light to the body of a walker with the sign ‘rich bitch’ on her naked chest. “That’s exactly what they were, every single one of them.”

Daryl put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. Zach had been just as lonely as he had been, but with all the money in the world. He wondered in which case was worse. To have a mother that didn’t spend time with you because she was dead, a father that hated you because you were a bastard; or to have both, and just not have them love you.

He saw Beth look at the dead half naked walker, and stood up. He grabbed the first wrap he found and without saying anything threw it around the walker’s front. It wasn’t pretty, but he felt it would have been something Carol would have wanted.

He turned to grab his bow and left the room, expecting the two to follow. He was not going to think of Carol and a walker in the same sentence ever again.

He walked in front of the two of them, knowing that Zach was going to leave Beth between them. The grandfather clock he had barely paid attention to as he entered rang loudly as they walked by, just before they started hearing walkers coming closer to them.

They finally made it to a room that was well lit, the intact windows letting the light of the sun shine over the unused locker room. He pushed Beth first and then Zach towards the door. He was going to follow them when he closed his eyes.

The tightness in his chest was not letting go. And he knew that they needed to get rid of the walkers behind them if they ever wanted to get out of there alive. Or at least that’s what he said to himself while trying to convince himself that it wasn’t just because he needed the fight. Because he felt the need to hit something, he needed to let out his anger somehow. He would usually have done so picking up a fight with Murphy, always easiest to rile up.

Because once you riled up Connor enough, well his brother was a crazy motherfucker when mad. He didn’t look at Zach as he turned and let the bolt fly. He was in a good position, the walkers had to come in one by one because of the narrow hallway.

The second one he slammed his bow into his chest, before grabbing a golf club and slamming it over his head. The walker fell and he turned to the next one, using the same club only for it to break after the hit that finally put him down for good.

He used the pole as a lance, slamming it through the walker’s head. There were two left by then.

His body was full of adrenaline, and he could feel as his hands shook as he kicked a walker away from him. He slammed his knife to the next one, feeling with satisfaction as it stopped moving and fell from his grip.

He grabbed another golf club. His hands were shaking so bad he aimed wrong and he hit the walker on the chest. He missed the next hit as well. His back was to the kids, so he slammed the club against the head of the walker. He felt some of the tightness in his chest let lose, so he did it again. And again. And again.

He was breathing hard by the time the walker was unmoving under him, his head bashed in. His back was still to Beth and Zach and kept himself like that for a moment longer. Daryl raised his head, took a deep breath and threw away the cub.

Silently he went to grab his crossbow from where he had dropped it, and finally turned back to where Beth and Zach were waiting.

He didn’t even look at them, not willing to see the pity or the terror he expected to see in their eyes. There was violence in him, ingrained to his bones. There was violence in his DNA that neither him nor any of his brothers could hide when the time came.

Daryl led them through the next hallway, rolling his eyes as they made it to yet another bar.

“We made it…” There was wonder in Beth’s voice as she walked pass him. She turned, looking at him in the eyes. “I know you think it’s stupid, and it probably is; but all I wanted to do was sit down and cry today, and we couldn’t do that. I needed a drink, and you needed to beat up walkers.”

“It was stupid,” Daryl’s rough voice made Beth stop on her tracks since she had started to make her way to the bar. “You just refused to listen to anyone that wasn’t you, we have a destination in mind. We are not stopping for a fucking drink here.”

“But Daryl!”

Daryl grimaced as Beth whined at him. He just raised a hand, glaring at the girl. “No.” Beth opened her mouth again to say something else, but Daryl beat her to it. “You have not stopped to think since we escape, we are moving now to where we were supposed to be two days ago.”

Daryl started moving towards the covered doors at the side of the bar. “And I will get you your fucking drink if that’s what you want.”

They were out of the country club in just a couple of seconds, the bag at Daryl’s back carrying the only belongings they had left. The few water bottles from camp, that he passed once they stopped about half an hour later, together with what they had taken from the club.

It wasn’t that much, but at least it was something. Daryl let Zach take the backpack as they continued their way, biting his lip as he put his hand inside his pocket where he had the jasper stone and the ring.

Where he had Carol’s things.

“A motorcycle mechanic.”

Daryl frowned, looking over his shoulder as Beth broke the silence later that day.

“No, that’s too obvious, and I already asked,” Zach said with a chuckle as he smiled in Daryl’s direction, making the older man roll his eyes and shake his head.

“It’s gotta be fashion designer.” Zach smiled grew as he saw Beth’s confused face, “didn’t you see how artsy he draped that wrap over the female anatomy.”

Daryl stopped, frowned, looked at Zach, before he continued his way as he shook his head.

“A professional hunter?” Beth asked as she jumped over a fallen log.

“It’s once a day, both of you already used your turns.” Daryl muttered as he turned to look at the sky, before changing his direction slightly to the right. “It doesn’t matter anyway, it hasn’t for a long time now.”

“I was just making conversation.” Beth grumbled as she moved closer to Zach as they followed Daryl.

He was still looking around them, paying more attention to the ground and nature around them than to them. “I’ve never been good at that.”

“Unless its with your brothers, and with Mama Carol.”

“Have you tried to not talk when both Murphy and Connor are around?”

“And Carol?” Beth’s voice had enough innocence in it that Daryl couldn’t just shut her down like he would have Zach. He just decided to change the subject.

“Here,” Daryl muttered as he went through some vines, feeling his chest expand as he encountered the old shack on the other side. He looked behind him, making sure the kids were alright and following him before he started walking faster.

All he could think of was that he would open the door and they would be there, that they would notice him coming up the stairs, his loud steps alerting them of his presence and they would come out to greet him.

His hand shook as he pushed the door open, only to find the shack empty.

There was not even a hint of anyone having been there after him and his brothers had been there weeks ago.

Daryl closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against the door as he smacked it against it once and again. He heard as Zach and Beth started climbing up the few steps between the ground and were the door was, and he tried to pull himself together before they saw him like this.

He had to be strong. He would wait until tomorrow and then; he would go and look out for them. He would find them.

“Zach, stay here, secure the other door.” Daryl raised his crossbow just enough to let the boy pass, “You, you want your alcohol, come with me.”

A drink sounded like a really good idea. . And the best thing was that he knew exactly where to find it.

“Boo yah,” Daryl whispered to himself as he opened the door to the side room of the cabin, finding the wooden crate they had filled to take back home and then forgotten about exactly where they had left it.

“What is that?”  

“Moonshine.” Daryl turned after grabbing the crate, and dumping it on the unexpecting girl’s arms. He wasn’t above being juvenile; he had shown that before when squabbling with his brothers. Carol hated when they fought.

He walked back into the house, taking care to close the door behind Beth, rolling his eyes as he saw Zach move quickly to help her with her load. The place looked a little less awful than the first time he had stayed there, after all Connor had found the need to redecorate by throwing a lot of shit outside the window while drunk that night.

He closed his eyes for a moment as he felt a pang in his heart as he tried to chase away the feeling it brought to him to not having found his siblings there. He had to keep the faith, they were just shit at following directions. That was what it was.

Daryl moved to where they had dropped the crate with the moonshine, taking to jars out and opening one before giving it to Beth. He didn’t wait for her to say anything, but opened the second one taking a big gulp.

The feeling of burning as the alcohol traveled down his esophagus was one he welcomed right then. The pain distracting him for a moment from the reality of the situation. His grand plan, that was to get to this point and hope that his family had beat him to it was a bust.

He was going to have to start from zero the next morning.

“What?” Daryl grumbled as he went to take another drink, as he saw Beth looking at him with a strange look on her face. He looked away as he realized what it was, he did not need anyone’s pity.

“My daddy used to say Moonshine would leave you blind.”

“And Mrs. Sanders said the same thing about wanking, and neither of them is true.” Daryl took another big sip of the jar of moonshine as he turned his back on the two kids and went to drop himself on the couch.

The room was secure; they had made sure of that the last time they stayed there. The covers over the windows were still hanging, and there was nothing other than keep watch over the door that they needed to do.

“There’s some can shit in the drawers, and some matches.” Daryl pointed at the run-down kitchen, as he took a smaller sip of the jar as he watched as they moved around.

He could feel his head starting to get dizzy, and he knew he was probably going to stop at that jar. He didn’t really want to stop. Daryl groaned, as he dropped his head back on the couch, sighing as he looked at the disgusting ceiling.

He really had thought they would be there. He really had allowed himself to hope that Murphy would have been able to remember how to get here and that he and Carol would have been waiting for him.

Daryl finished the moonshine jar without looking at neither Beth nor Zach. He needed a moment to think, he needed a moment to just be.

“There’s so many cigarettes butts, the owner here must have never cleaned.” There was clear disgust in Beth’s voice and Daryl tried not to snigger at the fact that most of them were probably their fault, his brothers and him did smoke like chimneys when there was a chance.

The moonshine might have worked a little too fast on an almost empty stomach he suspected.

“There’s so much shit,” Zach murmured as he passed an open can to Beth, throwing a look to the buckets and papers scattered around. “Do you think someone actually put all this things here?”

“Settle down, rich boy.” Daryl had closed his eyes as the room had started to spin a little around him, “not everyone grew up around a country club.” Daryl opened his eyes, looking at him as he smiled sardonically “welcome to my country club.”

Daryl opened his mouth to continue on his tirade when the sound of shuffling and groaning from outside made the three of them tense up. He stood up, swaying slightly as he approached the window. “Is just one,” he said softly as he saw Zach approach the other side of the cover.

“Should we get rid of it.” Beth asked as she moved to join them.

“If it starts making too much noise, yeah.”

“I can take it,” Zach said as he looked out the window again, looking at the lone walker.

“Settle down, rich boy.” Daryl pushed him away softly repeating his words from before, snickering when the boy almost lost his balance and fell; before he walked back into the couch and sprawled all over.

“Well…” Daryl glared at Beth as he saw her move towards the crate with the moonshine again, “if we’re going to be trapped here, we should better make the best of it.”

Daryl raised his eyebrows as the girl passed him another jar. He opened it, taking a smaller sip. He wanted to forget, but he wasn’t careless. He might trust Zach to have his back, but he couldn’t trust he wouldn’t do something stupid if he got drunk.

He was a champion at doing stupid stuff while drunk.

Beth gave Zach one of the moonshine jar, and Daryl couldn’t help but feel even more fondness of the boy when he saw him making faces as he took his first sip of the concoction.

“This is even worse than tequila,” Zach said as he glared at the liquid as if it had personally offended him. Daryl just chuckled leaning over and grabbing a plastic crate that was next to him, throwing it to his right and motioning for Zach to take a seat.

Daryl didn’t realize what was happening, but as the silence settled over them, his thoughts started to wander. And he started drinking.

What if Connor had ended up on his own? Nah, he probably already found Murphy and they’re right on his way. He took a drink. What if Carol was driving on the other direction from where they were? Nah, his girl was smart enough to stay close and not let Dick Grimes tell her what to do. What if Murphy was still too weak and hadn’t been able to get out of the prison?

When he looked at his hand, the second mason jar was empty.

“Let’s play a game!” Beth broke the silence with her fake cheery voice, making Daryl look at her frowning before following her eyes to an also upset looking Zach.

Daryl nodded, dropping himself to sit on the floor as she used the crate that Zach had used as a table for his can putting it between the three of them. 

“So we’re playing I never never.”

Zach nodded, and Daryl just looked at her, lost. Beth noticed that, passing him another jar before settling down.

“So I say something that I have never done, and if you have done it, you drink. And then the next person-“she pointed at Zach, “gets a turn.”

“And how do you know, pray tell Miss Beth, this game if you have never drank in your life?” Zach’s tone was mocking, as he swirled the liquid inside the jar.

“My friends used to play it in front of me, I would just watch.”

“And never played seven minutes in heaven, I would just watch.”

“Drink,” Daryl said as he motioned to Zach with his own drink. At the boy’s look he just added, “you said the words, you have played so you drink.”

Zach rolled his eyes before taking a sip, grinning over the rim as Beth took one too. Daryl just looked at them.

“You never played seven minutes in heaven?” Beth asked him, flabbergasted.

Daryl shook his head, looking as the two of them shared a knowing look.

“My turn,” Beth said, “I have never shot a crossbow.”

Daryl raised his jar to his lips, taking a sip as he glared at Zach as he took one. “Did you shoot my crossbow?” His voice was rougher than usual, because of the alcohol.

“Nooooo.” Daryl continued to glare at the boy as he tried to look innocent but was still trying to keep a grin at bay.

“Your turn, Daryl.”

“I’ve never been on vacations.”

“Never?” Both Zach and Beth asked at the same time, making Daryl frown as the two of them immediately said ‘jinx’. Daryl just frowned at them, making a face. He hated teenagers.

“No.”

Beth and Zach both took a drink.

“I’ve never gotten drunk and then done things I regretted.”

Daryl and Zach took a drink. “If you continue this, you’re going to be drunk as a skunk.” Zach just shrugged.

“I’ve never had a loving family.” Beth looked at Zach with pity on her eyes, as she raised her glass. Daryl took a drink, before glaring at Zach as he didn’t.

“Drink up.” Zach frowned at Daryl, before a small smile appeared on his face. The kid needed to remember that not all family was blood related.

“I’ve never gone to mass or to a service.”

“That’s got to be a lie,” Zach said, slightly slurring his words as he did so. Daryl shook his head and Zach added. “You’re Connor’s brother!”

Daryl shrugged.

Beth looked at the two men, before looking at Zach from the corner of her eye. “I’ve never been in love.”

Zach’s eyes immediately went to her, both of them not paying enough attention to see Daryl raising his jar and taking a sip.

“I’ve never cried because of a person of the opposite sex.”

Daryl raised his glass and drank. The two teens were still only looking at each other not paying attention to him.

“I’ve never been too scared of telling someone how I really felt.”

Daryl drank once again.

“I’ve never been a major bi-“

“I’ve never gotten grounded for stupid shit.” Daryl interrupted Zach before he said something that would take them down the road that led to a shouting match once again. 

Both Beth and Zach turned their glares onto him as he interrupted their little fight, he just made a face as he watched the two kids glare at him before drinking.

“I’ve never been in jail.” Beth’s voice was cutting as she looked right at him. Daryl didn’t react, just kept on looking at her in the eyes. “I meant as a prisoner, not like we were living.” Daryl didn’t say anything, nor raised his jar to drink.

“Is that what you think of me?” There was absolutely no mirth in his voice, and Beth started fidgeting across from him.

“I don’t mean anything major, just like the drunk tank or something. Even my dad was in it back in the day.” Beth looked at Zach for help, chuckling as she did so. She found him glaring at her, real anger behind his eyes.

“Drink up,” Daryl said dismissively his eyes never leaving hers.

“Prison guard! Were you a prison guard?” The fake cheeriness in Beth’s demeanor only seemed to piss Daryl off even more.

Daryl sighed, not exactly knowing why those words had hurt so much. He stood up, trying to pretend he wasn’t feeling the alcohol by then. “I’m taking a piss,” he said loudly as he walked across the room towards the back.

He threw the jar with moonshine to the ground, not caring as he heard the walker outside reacting to the sound.

“Daryl, be quiet!” Beth hissed.

“I can’t hear you! I’m taking a piss!” Daryl said as he started taking a piss, he made sure his back was to her as he staggered a little forward, putting a hand against the wall to keep his balance.

“Daryl, don’t talk so loud!”

“What? Are you going to arrest me for disturbance of the peace? Trying to finally break me, officer?”

He looked over his shoulder, seeing as both kids were watching him. “Oh, wait, it’s my turn now, right?”

“It’s actually mine,” Zach said softly while Daryl didn’t even acknowledge that he had spoken. 

He made sure he was completely covered before turning and starting to walk towards the two of them. “I’ve never had a home before, I never had someone to cook for me, to care for me before.”

Daryl opened his arms as he walked closer to both Beth and Zach. “I never had Christmas gifts, I never had someone to tuck me in, I never had someone kiss me goodnight.”

In the back of his mind, he knew he was being too loud, too open. But he had barely eaten anything that day, other than the snake they had for breakfast and that had been hours before. And he had drunk two and a half moonshine jars.

He had always been a mouthy drunk after all.

“I never had someone to look after me.” Daryl started to pace inside the small room, pushing things away when they got too close to him. “I never had someone to protect me, to think of me above everyone else.” His voice was breaking as he continued to speak loudly.

He had long stopped looking at the kids, instead his eyes were just going from one side to the other of the room. He felt them burn with unshed tears, but he was not going to let those come out. He was refusing to break down again.

“I never had someone to tell me they loved me.” Beth and Zach looked at him with alarmed faces when he finally looked down at them, a sneer on his face and tears down his cheeks.

The walker outside just snarled louder, and it just pissed him off even more. “Looks like our friend outside wants to get his turn too!”

“Daryl! No!” Beth cried, huffing as Zach stumbled over her as the two of them tried to stand up and follow the Daryl after he grabbed his crossbow, crossed the room and opened the door.

“Shit! Daryl!” Zach said as he pushed Beth away and got to his feet, swaying slightly as he walked outside of the house.

Zach almost jumped down the three steps as he heard the first bolt fly out and hit its target. “Daryl!”

“Cheer up, rich boy,” Daryl muttered as he reloaded the crossbow. “I know you wanted to shoot this, wanna try now?”

The walker was pinned against a wooden beam, snarling as it raised its arms as if trying to grab at them. Zach watched as Daryl let another bolt fly. The bolt his the walker on the chest, pinning it even more. He wasn’t entirely sure if Daryl was actually meaning to do that, or if he was just too drunk to aim properly.

“How about you, my little pony?” Daryl snarled at Beth, making a grab at her as she stood next to Zach putting an arm around her shoulders and raising his crossbow to shoot again. “You wanted to learn how to shoot one of these, don’t you?”

“Daryl, stop!” Beth said as she struggled against him for him to let go, the moment she felt her struggle he dropped his arm moving away as if he had been burned.

Daryl took a couple of steps even further back, loading the crossbow again before shooting again and hitting the walker on the stomach.

“Stop it!” Beth yelled as she took a step closer to him.

“Why should I do that? You ain’t the boss of me.” Daryl was moving closer to the walker, “now help me get this out so you two can have some target fun.”

Beth huffed, moving around him while taking out her knife before she slammed it into the walker’s head.

“What did you do that for! That was supposed to be practice!

“You’re just being a jackass!” Beth’s voice just seemed to irk Daryl even more. “What if that was my dad?”

“Don’t,” Daryl sneered at her, his bow down and his eyes on hers. “is not even remotely the same!”

“Killing them is not supposed to be fun!”

“Who the fuck is having fun here! I’m trying to keep the two of you alive, that’s what I’ve been trying since we fucking ran out of the prison like little bitches!”

“You call that not having fun?!” Beth shrieked as she stood her ground. 

Zach took a step closer to Beth as she got into Daryl’s face, both were breathing hard and he could see how Daryl’s armor had started to chip.

“What do you want from me, little girl?!”

“I want you to stop acting like we didn’t lose nothing, like you don’t care!”

“Do you think I don’t care?” Daryl’s chest was rising and falling fast, and Zach could see that his hands were shaking. “You have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.”

“You didn’t care you lost Murphy’s tracks, you didn’t care enough to go look for them right after the prison fell.” Zach took a step closer to Beth, moving to grab her elbow only to get have her move away from him, still yelling at Daryl. “You act like none of the people we lost meant anything to you!”

Daryl chuckled humorlessly, throwing his crossbow to the side and opening his arms wide. “You sure know me, Bethie!” Daryl knew that had been the nickname Hershel had used for her more than once, and he didn’t care. “That’s the fucking truth, I don’t give a shit about anyone at the prison.”

“I do not give a damn shit about my brothers, after all I only had them for six months, how could you love someone to your very soul after just meeting them six months ago, right?”

“Of course I do not care about Carol, the only fucking woman in my fucking life that have ever made me feel like I’m worth a fucking thing.” There were tears streaming down Daryl’s cheeks as he took a step closer to Beth, he was still yelling and without noticing he had been slamming his fist into his chest with every declaration.

“But of course I can’t care for them, can’t I?” He was almost to Beth’s face as he said that. “Because I’m not falling into pieces’ girl, do not dare to think I’m not mourning everything we lost. You know nothing!”

“I know that when you look at me you just see another dead girl!” Beth yelled at him as she took a step closer, feeling satisfaction in her chest when Daryl took a step back. “But I made it, I’m not like them, but I made it, not Michonne, not Maggie, not Carol.”

“Don’t you dare to say even her name.” Daryl’s voice went low, seething as he looked at Beth.

“You’re just afraid…” Beth continued as if she was not facing an enraged man, not caring about anything but getting everything out. “I saw you, when that girl came out of the barn, you were afraid.”

“Fuck you.” With that, Daryl turned on his heel, grabbed his bow from where he had thrown it and walked towards the woods. He was not thinking about walkers or about what the kids would do without him; he could not think about anything but Sophia.

Sophia that he had been too late to save, Sophia whom he had let down, Sophia who had been her mother’s world and had left a gap in her heart that he knew she could never recover from.

Who knew if she was even alive to recover from that. His vision was blurry as he stomped away from the shack. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t speak, he could barely see.

He finally stopped far enough away that he knew he would be left alone. He stopped and sat under a tree pulling out one of his last remaining cigarettes from his pocket. He had been saving it to share it with his brothers, he put it to his lips.

He was still crying, his chest heaving occasionally, as he tried to stiffen the sobs. The alcohol had let his tongue loose, it had just brought his feelings to the surface from where he had pushed them down to the very depths of his mind. He had told himself he was not going to let himself feel it, h was not going to let his heart fully consider the possibility of his brothers, of his woman, to be gone.

Beth had forced that onto him. He had been doing a good job, at least he thought he was. He had kept the feelings at bay, the goal always on the front of his mind. He had to get to the shack, he had to get the kids safe there, he would find a trail and he would find them after.

Well, he was not there, and he only had one out of the three. He had no plan, he had no trail; and he didn’t want to think about it but it felt like he would have to look around all of Georgia for them.

He would do it, too.

He still had the cigarette on his lips as he looked at the sky. It was starting to get dark, he had no idea how long he had spent out there on his own. The tingling and dizziness brought to him by the alcohol had left him long before. He was tired and hungry.

With a sigh, he got to his feet and started his trek back to their temporary house. He needed to think a new plan for them, he needed to contemplate what would be the best course of action now that the shack was a bust. He could go back to where he last saw Murphy’s trail. He could put signs for them to find.

Daryl chuckled to himself as he saw the shack appear in front of him. If only Merle could see him now, somewhere along the way, he had found hope. He was not going to let go of it so soon.

He had calmed somewhat, but he still couldn’t face the kids. He felt shame at how he had reacted, after all he was the adult out of the three of them. Although Carol sometimes just didn’t seem to believe so either.

He wasn’t stupid, he knew he had just been bottling up what he was feeling, and that the alcohol together with Beth’s stupid game and words had just been too much. Still, the girl didn’t deserve his asshole behavior.

She was just a girl. A girl that had just lost her father, who had lost his sister for the time being. A girl who was stuck with his sourly ass, and with apparently a boy that she wasn’t sure she loved.

Both her and Zach were so young, and yet both were more mature than him in certain things. He might be forty something, but sometimes he felt like the teenager.

He didn’t enter the shack. He sat back on the deck as he silently watched the sky get darker and darker. His stomach felt a little queasy over the amount of alcohol with no real food he had consumed earlier, but he felt that it was the least he deserved.

He needed to control his emotions if he was going to find them, if he was going to get all of them out of there alive.

“Here.” Daryl looked up from where he had been messing with his crossbow to see Zach passing him an open can of chef Boyardee ravioli. “It’s good.”

“I know,” Daryl muttered as he brought the tin up to his mouth, tipping it up until he could get a mouthful of ravioli. “This shit was practically a gourmet dinner when I was a kid.”

He saw from the corner of his eye as Beth walked out of the room too, taking a seat against the wall as she watched the two of them. Daryl ate as silently as he could, taking the water bottle offered by Zach once he finished the full can.

Their only light once again was the one given by the moon, and Daryl couldn’t help but look at it and let his thoughts wander. He had taken out his knife without paying attention, and he was playing with it craving things into the boards they were sitting on.

Letters, he realized once he paid attention.

“I understand why my dad stopped drinking,” Beth said breaking the comfortable silence that had befallen among them.

“You feel sick?” Daryl’s voice was rougher than usual, and he cleared his throat wincing as he felt the scratchiness he knew came with drinking too much alcohol.

“I feel great, I wish I could feel like this all the time.”

Daryl snorted, shaking his head without looking up from his craving, “that’s because you’re a happy drunk.”

“I always thought I was the hugger type of drunk,” Zach mused, grinning at Daryl as he finally looked up.

“Please don’t drink anymore.”

Both teenagers chuckled at the deadpan tone of Daryl’s words, and he couldn’t help but feel a little bit lighter. They were alright.

“Barman.” Beth said suddenly.

“Nah, not a simple barman,” Zach said as he smiled at Beth, ”he was one of those fancy cocktails mixer, the ones that had a diploma and the whole bullshit.”

“I was nothing,” Daryl’s eyes were back to where he had been craving a name into the planks, “I wasted my life following Merle around, getting my ass kicked, doing whatever was that he told me to do.”

He could feel both of their eyes on him, and he couldn’t raise his. He knew that Zach for some reason looked up to him, that the boy cared for him. He didn’t want to see in his eyes the disappointment. The disappointment that he had always been.

“I don’t believe that,” Beth said softly from where she was sitting, and Daryl couldn’t help but stab his knife harder into the wood.

“I was nothing but Merle’s shadow, I was nothing until Carol.” Daryl chuckled, tracing her name where he had craved it on the plank, “before her I was nothing, and without them I am nothing.”

“Daryl-“

“I was just a redneck asshole, with an even bigger asshole for a brother who did nothing other than what he was told to do.”

“Do you miss him?” Zach asked as soon as he had finished his sentence. Daryl looked up at him, seeing that he was being honest in his question.

“He was a jackass; I’ve learnt what having siblings should mean and he wasn’t that.” He smiled sadly before looking back to the woods. “Still he was all I had for a long time.”

“I miss Maggie,” Beth added, feeling how the atmosphere had shifted and it had started to get too heavy for all of them. “I miss having her bossing me around, and I miss my brother Shawn.”

“I always wanted siblings,” Zach muttered, looking down at his hands. “I always prayed and prayed asking for one, so maybe that way I wouldn’t be alone.”

“I have two extras; I can lend you one of them.” Daryl gave Zach a small smile as the boy looked at him as he spoke, “gotta tell you though, they’re fucking annoying sometimes.”

“You love them.” Beth said, as if it was a matter of fact.

Daryl sighed, nodding slightly. He did, with all his heart.  

“I miss my dad,” Beth’s confession broke the silence, her voice breaking as she made to grab the jar of moonshine that was at her side. Zach quickly crawled over to her, pulling her into her arms. “I had thought he would get to grow old, he would get to see his grandchildren…”

Her cries made Daryl’s chest hurt. He had told Murphy not to take the shot, he had told his brother not to shoot the Governor. He had basically signed Hershel’s death sentence.

“I used to come from a place like this,” Daryl said softly pretending not to notice that Beth’s cries became a little quieter as he spoke. “My father used to have a place just like this, up to the fucking ashtray that Connor threw out of the window.”

“I never thought I would get out, I thought I would die while still having to bring my daddy his moonshine as he threw cigarette butts at me when I got to close.”

“But you did.”

Daryl raised his eyes and met Zach’s. “I did, and I found something better, I found myself and my family in the middle of the end of the world.”

“Who would have thought so,” Zach’s voice had a certain playfulness as he swayed from one side to the other with Beth still on his arms. “Daryl Dixon is a closeted optimist.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Daryl shook his head as he moved to stand up. “I’m going to sleep, you two keep watch for a while, wake me if you see anything.”

Daryl left the two kids behind as he made his way back inside the shack. His chest felt a little lighter, he knew he needed to think his plan through for tomorrow.

His family was still out there, and he needed to find them. As he laid down on the couch and got himself comfortable, he closed his eyes and for the first time since they had left the prison he dreamt.

His dreams were filled with blue eyes and soft kisses.

He woke up with a smile on his face.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys know the drill. Feel free to hop over to tumblr and chat. My ask is always open. 
> 
>  
> 
> [Geektaire](http://geektaire.tumblr.com)


	10. Claimed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise filler chapter in the middle of the week! 
> 
> This is a small update mates, so I chose to update in the middle of the week hoping to have the next new chapter on Tuesday. It does feel like a filler chapter, but we needed to know where this guys were... didn't we? 
> 
> Again, all this shit that's been going on has been hard on everyone. This is un betaed so please be kind with my ELS self.

**Chapter X**

**Claimed**

 

Carl had broken down again when they got back to the house. The sun had come and gone, and darkness had started to take over the sky. And Rick was still out cold. He had stood at the front of the room, giving the boy his space as he yelled at the unmoving figure of his father.

Carl had a lot of anger within himself. It was visible the effect all this was having on the boy, as Connor ushered him upstairs so they could scavenge as much as they could. He had been able to keep Carl’s mind out of things long enough for him to find a new backpack, and some jeans.

It had gotten too dark for them to do anything else but sit around and get some sleep. The two of them had hauled the mattress from the bedroom on the first floor dropping it on the space left by the couch in the middle of the room.

And then they had tried to get some sleep. Connor had woken up a few hours later as he felt the boy move closer to him, putting an arm around the boy’s shoulders and hugging him close. The kid was scared; he was terrified about what had happened the day before. But he would probably never accept that, unless it was to Murphy.

As if he didn’t need another reason why he had to find his family.

Connor looked at the sleeping Carl, who had moved to use his chest as a pillow and he couldn’t help but think of Ireland. He closed his eyes and remembered the green pastures of their homestead, the smell of their mother’s shitty cooking on the stove, the taste of good beer on his tongues.

He knew that he was probably never going to see Ireland again, he was never going to get a chance to talk to Sibeal and ask why they had kept Daryl from them. He would never get to visit his parents graves one last time.

Carl shot up as soon as the first groan was heard.

Connor tried to shush him back to sleep, but the boy was already looking at his father’s form expecting the worst.

“He hasn’t turn, he hasn’t stopped breathing, look?” Connor said softly, arm still around Carl’s shoulders as he pointed at Rick’s chest.

Rick’s chest that was moving up and down as he groaned.

“He’s okay?” There was such innocence in Carl’s question that Connor couldn’t do anything else but pull him in for a hug as he answered.

“He was beaten to a pulp, but he’s still alive.” He could feel as the boy deflated beside him, and Connor gave him a small smile. “Go to sleep, I’ll wake you if anything happens.”

“I can stay up, help you stand guard.”

“You’re dead on your sleep, you let me sleep yesterday morning, this is my turn.” Carl seemed to ponder that for a minute, before he laid himself back on the mattress, his back to his father with his eyes closed.

Connor continued to watch over them until early morning, Rick never stopped breathing.

It was light outside when anyone else moved again. Rick groaned as he opened his eyes, blinking quickly once and again as he pushed his hand into his hair. He moaned in pain as he tried to make enough strength to sit up.

“You should rest.” Connor tried not to feel any satisfaction as he saw Rick jump a little, startled looking to his left to see him leaning against the wall with Carl sleeping over him.

Rick’s eyes immediately went to his son. 

“He’s okay, considering everything that happened.” Rick nodded, stifling a moan as he finally sat up. He looked awful, and he swayed a little bit and Connor wondered if he was going to pass out. 

“Dad?” Carl said softly, as he sat up crawling across the room until he was kneeling by his father. Rick had eyes only for his son. Connor smiled at them softly, standing up and leaving the room to give them a little time. 

Connor walked out the kitchen to the back deck, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. The air was a little cold, dew covering all the surfaces around him. He sighed as she sunlight hit his face, closing his eyes as he allowed the warmth soothe the coldness he felt inside. The coldness that he knew would only be truly gone once he found his brothers and Carol once again. 

He took another deep breath, coughing slightly around the cigarette in his mouth. He should stop smoking, he knew that. He lighted it, taking a long drag feeling as the nicotine entered his body. He had been saving them to share share with Daryl and Murphy. After all how much were they really smoking if they usually shared it between the three of them. 

“Sorry brothers,” Connor muttered as he puffed out the smoke from his mouth, jiggling it to get rid of the ash. 

He took a seat on the steps leading down to the yard. Carl would call for him if he needed,  Rick and him needed time to talk, to get through what the boy was feeling. 

He stayed there even after finishing the smoke. He had no idea how long he had sat there, when he heard someone stepping onto the deck behind him. He looked over his shoulder expecting to see Carl there. 

“Hey lucky charms.”

The smile that appeared on his face was only rivaled by the one appearing on Michonne’s face as he stood up and pulled her into his arms. He would never mention it to anyone, but he had felt the desperation on her hug as she sneaked her arms around his back, not letting go for a long while. 

“It’s great to see you, gorgeous.” Connor winked at Michonne as he pulled back, using one of his thumbs to wipe the lone tear that had made its way down her cheek. 

“I’m telling Carol you’re a huge flirt.”

Carol chuckled, leaving an arm around Michonne’s back as he started leading the two of them back inside. “Don’t worry, my woman knows I’m a one woman man.”

“Even if she’s not a one man woman?” 

Connor stopped in his tracks, Michonne stopped a few steps later turning to look at Connor. 

“It’s not like that.” Michonne dropped her eyes as she saw the look on Connor’s. “Is not that she’s just pulling us along, we all love each others. There’s no one else for me than her, and there’s no one else for her than us.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

Connor nodded, moving to rest his back against the wall, seeing as Michonne did the same next to him. “Does she know?” Michonne asked softly, “Does she know how much she’s loved?”

“I tell her every single day, I swear to God.”

“Daryl wanted to tell her, he was going to tell her as soon as he got a chance.”

“She knows, he might have never outright told her but she knows.”

“I never got to tell Andrea.” Connor closed his eyes as he heard Michonne’s voice break, one of her hands covering her mouth as she tried to keep herself from sobbing out loud. Connor said nothing, he just turned and pulled her back into his arms. 

He rested his temple against hers as he felt her clutch him tighter. He could feel as she slowly started to push her feelings down, as she started to bury everything once again. She pulled away, not looking at him as she wiped her tears away. 

He could hear Carl’s steps as he started to make his way towards them, so he lowered his voice so only she could hear him. “She might not have known you loved her like that, but she knew you loved her.”

Michonne cleared her throat, giving him a small sad smile before she turned to Carl as he got close to them. 

“Do you guys want some breakfast?”

-.-.-

Connor had let both Carl and Michonne use the wet wipes they had found the day before first, taking his turn in the bathroom with the wipes after the two of them had somewhat cleaned themselves. 

He looked at himself on the mirror once he finished, noticing not for the first time how deep the lines on his forehead and around his eyes looked. He at least looked better than the day before. The fact that Michonne had found them gave him some hope. Hope that they would be able to find his brothers and Carol soon enough. 

They needed to move first though. He let the door to the bathroom open, the pack of wipes on the sink as he made his way to the dining room. He passed Rick on the corridor, nodding to the man as he limped to the bathroom for his turn at cleaning up. 

“No, no, it looks great!”

“What looks great?” Connor asked as he moved past Michonne, sitting himself beside Carl at the table reaching for the bag of stale cereal. 

“Carl is laughing at my new shirt.”

“Lad…” Connor said as he shook his head, “you never mock a lady’s fashion choice, what you do is this, watch.” Carl was grinning as he looked from Connor to Michonne, and back. “My lady, I had never seen someone as stunning as you, that shirt just fits you in all the right places.”

“I’m telling Carol on you!” Carl said as he busted out giggling, and Connor couldn’t help but let a real smile appear on his face as he watched the boy properly laugh for the first time in days. He shared a look with Michonne, nodding at her as she took a seat across from him. 

“Man, I wish I had some soy milk.”

“Really?” Carl said in between laughs, “That thing is disgusting....”

Connor continued to chuckle and nod along the two of them, as he watched Rick move behind Michonne. The man still looked like shit, but the arrival of Michonne had seemed to have given him an extra boost. He needed to speak with them about leaving soon, about getting back on the road to look for the rest of their family. 

“I would rather drink Judith’s formula…” Connor’s attention snapped back to Carl as the atmosphere of the room changed suddenly. The boy that had been laughing and joking just moments before was gone, and in his place was a boy that seemed to have the weight of the world upon his shoulders. 

“Hey,” Connor said patting Carl on the back when the silence became too much, “remember what we talked about.”

“I’m going to go finish my book, I have just a few chapters left.” Carl muttered as he pushed his chair back and practically ran upstairs. Connor and Michonne just watched him go. Silence reign again among the two of them. 

“He’s been having a really hard time,” Connor said as he returned to eat his dry cereal. “He’s been going in between utter devastation, and anger against everyone and everything.”

“And you?” Michonne asked, looking up from her bowl to look at him.

“I’m as good as always, lass.”

“Liar.” They shared a small smile. 

They finished their cereal in silence, while listening to Rick limp around in the background. 

“And how is he?” Connor didn’t need for Michonne to specify who ‘he’ was. 

“He just woke up before you arrived, Carl was afraid he had turned during the night.” 

“I didn’t know it was that bad.” 

“It was, but he seems better.” Connor brought the bowl to his mouth, making sure he was not leaving a single crumb uneaten. 

“When do you want to leave?” He smirked at Michonne as he put the bowl down, the woman had always been able to read him and his brothers quite easily. 

“As soon as possible, I need a map because I think we’re on the wrong side of where Daryl was going to meet us.”

“You had a plan?”

“Lass, have you met my youngest brother?” Connor stood up, pushing his chair in, “he’s a worrier, of course he had a plan in case something happened.”

Connor looked from the kitchen when he could see Rick lingering around, to the door Carl had left through. “I’ll take the kid, you talk to the old man.”

“You’re older than him.”

Connor just shrugged, giving her a small smile over his shoulder as he left the room. Things seemed to be looking up, at least a little bit. He took the stairs two steps at the time, being as silent as possible as he reached the top. He knew where he was going to find Carl.

“Are you even actually reading something?” Connor asked as he rested his shoulder against the doorframe leading into what had obviously been a male teenager room before everything went to shit. Carl was sitting in the middle of the floor surrounded by things but not really touching anything. 

“No.”

“Thought so.” Connor moved sitting down next to the door, making a face when his knee popped loudly as he did so. “Bad knee,” he muttered when he saw Carl looking at him weirdly. 

Carl made a face, before turning his attention to the comic books he had scattered in front of him. 

“It’s okay to miss her, it’s going to hurt but I would rather hurt than not to think of them.”

“Are we talking about Judith? Or about your brothers?”

“One and the same, isn’t it?”

“We saw her car seat all bloody, it’s not the fucking same thing.” Carl snarled as he grabbed one of the comic books and threw it to the wall. 

“I saw a hole in the middle of the building my brother was at, so I think I get an idea of what you are feeling.” 

Carl turned sharply to look at Connor, as locking eyes with the older man. “I know you are scared, I know you miss them; but we have to continue on, we have to have faith in them and in God that we’ll get through this.”

Silence fell upon them, and Connor let his head fall back to rest on the door closing his eyes. He sighed as he grabbed his rosary, touching each bead as he silently started praying. 

He would continue his prayers as long as he lived. He would never stopped asking God for his mercy and protection. That’s how he knew he would see his brothers again, that’s how he knew that as many trials and tribulations they went through they would be together again. 

“Carl! Connor! We’re leaving.” 

Carl jumped to his feet as soon as Michonne’s voice was heard from downstairs, stopping in front of Connor to offer his hand helping him stand up. “You’re such an old fart,” Carl chuckled as he groaned pulling Connor up. 

“Shut up you little idjit, someday I’ll tell you the story of how I fucked up my knee.”

“You lost your cane and fell when you tripped over it?” 

“I jumped from a five story building onto the back of a Russian mobster.”

“That’s fine, I’ll wait until you want to tell me the truth.”

Michonne gave the two of them a small smile as she saw them laughing as they walked down the stairs. 

“We’re going to some of the other houses, try to get as many things as we can before we leave.” At Connor’s look she added, “I talked with Rick, we’re moving tomorrow.”

“Good.” Was all Connor said as he walked past her to the door. “Ready?” He looked back to see Michonne and Carl, with Rick hovering on the background. 

At Michonne’s nod, Connor opened the door with his knife at the ready. He walked out, looking both ways before he dropped his knife motioning for them to come out. 

He didn’t pay attention to Rick, walking towards the road as Carl and Michonne talked with the other man. He pulled another cigarette from his pack, lighting it as he watched the three of them from afar. He could see Rick was still stealing glances at Michonne, with a glare included towards him as Carl walked away from him and towards the road. 

He waved at Rick, trying not to smirk as Rick just glared harder at him. “Ready?” He asked as soon as Carl joined him. 

“I’m hungry,” Carl answered sheepishly as he looked down, not seeing as Connor smirked shaking his head. 

“Well…” Carl chuckled as he felt Connor put an arm around his shoulders, making him start walking together with him as soon as Michonne reached them, “that wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t thrown a tantrum like the brat that you are.”

“You can get first dibs in whatever we find,” Michonne said looking at the two of them with a smile on her face, “unless it’s some canned cheese, that’s mine.”

They worked in silence through the neighborhood, one house after the next. Connor mader sure to stay close to Carl, making him smile with stupid comments or just annoying him until he dropped the surly teenager act.  All he did was basically try and remember how Murphy had acted while growing up and copied him. 

He had always been the mature twin, always. 

He kept an eye out on Michonne too. The woman was hurting, the four of them had talked more than once about the fact that she wore her heart on her sleeve when it came to Andrea; and the three of them, much to Carol’s chagrin, had dropped her hints here and there to make a move, to at least let the blond woman know what she was feeling. They had left the undertone of ‘before it’s too late’ out of their conversation but it was always a thought nowadays. 

It became too late. 

Connor grunted when he felt a bony elbow slamming into his stomach, “watch it kid, the ribs ain’t all that.” 

Carl gave him a grin, “look what I found.” Connor smiled as the boy showed him his new found stash of kitkats and snickers, “hey!”

Michonne grinned as she watched as Connor grabbed a bar and trotted away from a disgruntled looking Carl. She tried not to think about what she would have done if she hadn’t decided to follow them, where she would have been if she hadn’t decided to turn back yesterday and find them. 

She would probably not made it that much longer. She took a couple of steps closer to Carl, snatching a snickers from over his shoulder before moving back as he turned quickly to her. “Finders keepers, losers weepers.”

“But i found them!”

“Sorry lad,” Connor said as he opened the chocolate and took a bite, moaning as the chocolate hit his tongue. “It ain’t my fault that you’re slow.”

“Connor, I’m telling Carol on you.” 

“Why does everyone keep threatening you three by telling Carol on you?” Michonne asked with a chuckle as she reached Connor, looking at Carl as she took a bite of her chocolate. 

“Because they haven’t realized that she’s probably worse than we are…” Michonne watched as Connor opened the bag he was carrying, helping Carl drop his stash on it before shouldering it again. “They all look and see her as being all innocent while we’re the evil ones that are corrupting her,” Connor shook his head, “but nah, she’s the worst of us all.”

“I’m telling Carol you said that.”

“Come on!”

-.-.-

Connor waited outside as Michonne took Carl inside the latest house while he smoked outside. The weather was just starting to cool, the breeze causing him to shiver where he stood leaning on the porch of the house while he took a deep drag. He squinted as the few clouds shifted and hit him right in the eyes, he missed his sunglasses.  

He turned around when he heard the door open again, raising his eyebrows as Carl walked past him without saying anything. Michonne only shook her head in negative. The boy seemed to be going from acceptable to awful in the turn of a minute, he in part could understand it wasn’t easy being a teenage boy and on top of that being in the middle of the shit storm that they were at. But he was going to have whiplash with how fast his moods changed. 

“Found anything interesting?” Connor asked as both him and Michonne hurried to each walk at one of the boy’s side. 

Carl shook his head. 

“Well, if you two are good I might be willing to share my loot,” Michonne said in a mock nice voice.  She pulled out a can of cheese and shook it in front of Carl’s face. The teen just looked at her before rolling his eyes before continuing on his way. 

“What on earth is that thing?”

“Canned cheese?” Michonne trotted up to catch up to Carl again, while Connor was left behind. 

“You weren’t actually kidding about that?”

“Nope.” Michonne opened the can, opening her mouth and letting a long string of cheese fall on it before turning to look at Carl. 

“That’s disgusting,” Connor muttered as he elbowed Carl, who snickered lightly before pushing him away and climbing the two steps to get to the front of the last house they had decided to loot. 

“I’m hilarious,” Michonne said, looking as Carl tried for the knob and found it locked. “Well, maybe I was better with toddlers.”

Connor stood back, smiling as he grabbed the bags that Carl suddenly passed him. Michonne raised her eyebrow at him as the two of them watched the teen, settling as Connor gave her a knowing look. 

“Toddlers?”

The two of them pretended not to be paying attention at Carl as he looked at the door like it had personally offended him. 

“Around 2 or 3 years.” 

“So that’s why you and Murphy get along so well.” Carl had been ready to try his hand at kicking the door open but stopped as he registered Connor’s comment, he looked back at the oldest MacManus before he busted out laughing. 

“He laughs because he knows it's true.” Michonne and Connor shared a smile as the boy continued to chuckle as he turned his eyesight back to his latest enemy. 

They watched as Carl squared his shoulders, raised his foot and gave the door a swift kick. 

It didn’t open. 

“For fuck’s sake!” Carl yelled before he took another deep breath, and tried again. 

“Aren’t you going to tell him you’re telling Carol on him?” Michonne asked, elbowing Connor on the side as they saw Carl glared at the door when it moved just a little but did not open fully. 

“Have you heard us talk?”

“Fair point.”

The expression of happiness on Carl’s face when the door finally slammed open after a few tries made Connor chuckle. 

“So…” Carl said as he shouldered the bag Connor passed back to him, walking behind him as they entered the house. “Toddlers?”

“I guess I walked right into that one,” Michonne muttered as they walked warily into the house, the three of them relaxing once it was obvious that there were no surprises waiting for them inside. At Carl’s look Michonne gave him a sad smile, “I had a three year old son, and I must tell both of you he happened to find me extremely funny.”

Connor didn’t say anything, he just grabbed her upper arm as he went to move past her and gave her a soft squeeze. He knew how that loss was still with her, he saw how losing Sophia had never left Carol. And he knew that the pain she felt? that both Michonne and Carol felt? He would take it from them and make it his if he could, but it was not possible. 

There were no words that could encompass what she deserved, so he didn’t. He would add that little boy to his daily prayers. He would vow to that little boy to help his mama stay alive longer. 

“Why you never told me you had a kid?” Connor looked over his shoulder at Carl, who was now next to Michonne looking desperate, “what was his name?” He continued after Michonne only shrugged as an answer. 

“Did you had any others?” 

“Carl…” the warning in Connor’s tone made the boy take a step back from where he had been hounding on Michonne. At Connor’s look Carl looked abashed, muttering a ‘sorry’ to Michonne as he moved back to look for things to take with them. 

“It’s alright,” Michonne said after taking a deep breath. At Carl’s eager look she pointed a finger at him. “I’ll answer one question at the time, one room at the time,” she made a dramatic stop there, “and only after we cleared it...” Connor shook his head as he pushed some batteries from a remote control into his bag. “And he has to answer one of mine in turn.” His head came up frowning as he looked at the victorious looking woman. 

“Deal!”

“What?” Connor’s voice was a pitch higher, his accent a lot thicker as it was whenever he was upset, “what the hell are you talking about?”

“Shhh, Con,” Carl started moving around the room, putting things in his bag at a faster speed than before. “I’m thinking my first question.”

Connor snorted, before he went back to his job. The three of them moved through the room, with a proficiency obtained only after many houses cleared together. He stole small looks at Michonne, he knew the woman, she was one of the smartest persons within their group. He was going to have hell to pay with her questions. 

“What was your son’s name?” Carl asked Michonne softly as she looked at a painting as he put the last thing found inside his back. Michonne turned, looked the room over before looking down at Carl. 

“I said after.”

“This are actually two separate rooms,” Carl said as he pointed to the french glass doors that would separate the dining room from the living room. “So technically you owe me two questions.”

“Good argument, counselor…” Connor chuckled at her words, trying to hide his nervousness as she turned her sights onto him, “Andre, my son’s name was Andre. His name was Andre Anthony.”

“Now is my turn…” Connor returned her smile as she watched him, “is Carol the first woman you and your brothers share?”

Connor couldn’t help but burst into laughter as Carl started to cough behind them, moving to slap the back of the boy’s back as he continued to do so. “Believe it or not, she is.”

“Too much information.” Carl muttered as he finally settled down, moving away from the two of them and into the next room. 

“It’s your turn Grimes! Thought you were having fun!” Connor couldn’t help but yell after him, still chuckling at the boy’s reaction. 

“You two are fucking disgusting.”

“What your fucking language, lad!” 

“You still owe me a question,” Michonne said as the two of them moved to follow Carl, not feeling right leaving the boy on his own for long. 

“Go ahead, hit me with your best shot.” Connor said softly, putting a hand on Michonne’s shoulder as they watched Carl move through the corridor opening drawers and clearing the area. 

“Do you really think we will find the others?”

“I know we will.”

“Am I going to have to kick your ass, Con, for putting the moves on Michonne while Carol is not around?” The two of them looked from where they were standing close to where Carl was standing with his arms crossed over his chest glaring at them. 

“No offense, lass,” Connor said as he patted Michonne’s shoulder, “but you got nothing on my woman.”

“Wife,” Carl said with a smile on his face and mischief look on his eyes that reminded Connor of Murphy for a moment. 

“What?” Michonne said frowning looking from Connor to Carl.

“He called Carol his wife yesterday.”

“When did you get married?” Michonne asked, backhanding him on the chest as they moved forward. 

“Sorry, lass, you don’t have any questions left.”

“Hurry up Carl, I know exactly where this is going now.”

-.-.-.-

Their spirits had been better since leaving that last house. Connor looked at the two persons beside him, and he couldn’t help but feel like a weight had been lifted from his chest as they left the house behind. He had been able to keep them from seeing the horrifying sight of what had happened to that family, and the fact that they had left him meant a lot to him. 

“So let me get this straight,” Carl said laughter in his voice as he turned to walk backwards to be able to see the two adults as he talked, “you haven’t even asked Carol if she wants,” he made an emphasis on the word, “to be your wife?”

“That is correct.”

“And yet…”

“Lad,” Connor said stopping on the middle of the street and looking completely serious, “I’m hers, there’s no one out there in the world that I will love as much as I love her and my brothers, in my head I’ve been hers since the moment we met.”

He started walking once again, leaving both Michonne and Carl behind. He heard the hurried steps of the two of them just seconds later. “How the hell do you manage to say shit like that and make it seem romantic instead of creepy?”

Connor just chuckled as he put an arm around Carl’s shoulders, shaking the boy and pulling him to a side hug. “I’ll teach you how to talk to girls when you get older…”

“I’m thirteen not eight.”

“When I was thirteen all I cared about was cigarettes and films.” Connor muttered as they turned to go down the street where their house was.

“You only still care about cigarettes and films, Con,” Carl said rolling his eyes. 

“And Carol, I would only add Carol to that.” The cheeky smirk on Connor’s face only made Carl roll his eyes even more. 

“Really? Thirteen?” Michonne asked, incredulity in her voice. 

“All boys school, we were in a bunch of advance placement classes, older students…” Connor shrugged as if it was the most obvious thing ever. 

“Europeans,” Michonne muttered making Carl laugh beside her. 

They were still chuckling softly once in awhile when the sound of two shots made the three of them tense up stopping on their tracks. 

“They’re coming from-”

“Go! Go!” Rick whispered to them as he ran towards the road, Connor pulled out his gun looking over Rick’s shoulder as the injured man caught up with them. “Let’s go!” Connor stumbled a little before Rick pulled him along as he turned and started jogging along. 

They didn’t stop until they were far away from the house, standing next to some rail tracks. “We should follow the tracks,” Connor said softly squinting as the sun hit his eyes. 

“I think we should really get out of the middle of nowhere.” Rick said as he stopped, his weight in one leg as he looked as both Michonne and Carl looked at Connor before turning to look at him. 

“Daryl,” Connor stopped, swallowing as he felt a knot on his throat at the idea of his brother, “we said we would meet at this house, I don’t know where exactly it is since I only know how to get there from the prison.”

Connor’s eyes were on Rick’s. “But I do remember we walked by some tracks at some point, we might be able to find that house again.”

“Are we willing to put everything on that? Are we?”

“I’m going, if there’s even one chance that I might find my brothers…” Connor didn’t finish the sentence. 

“Dad.” Carl’s pleading tone was finally what broke Rick. The former officer nodded sharply, glaring at the Irishman’s back as Carl moved to walk at his side as they started to walk on top of the tracks. 

“You did good,” Michonne said softly, a small smile on her face as she moved to follow. Rick looked at their retreating backs, sighing before he too started to walk down the tracks. 

They had a long way to go. 

“Dad!” Rick sharply looked up from where he was looking at the ground as they walked, already feeling the effects of not being completely well after just a few minutes of walking. “Look!” Carl pointed at a sign on the side of the road. 

“Terminus,” Connor said softly as the four of them looked at the sign. 

“What do you think?” Michonne asked Rick looking at him from the side of her eye. 

“Let’s go.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you guys! See you soon.


	11. The Grove

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NaNoWriMo is making me so productive..... another bottle chapter! We're almost there guys! Three chapters away from finishing this one, and the word count is about to reach the same one of the original!
> 
> Thank you so much Alannastara for being your awesome self and beta-ing this, and to everyone who is there for me when I whine my way through chapters.... thank you...

**Chapter XI**

**The Grove**

 

 

They had walked until they hadn’t been able to walk anymore. Traveling with three little girls would have been a challenge of its own before the world as they know it had ended; now? Now it was a nightmare.

Judith was passed around the three of them as they walked, the little girl preferring Carol or Murphy over everyone else but with Tyreese being unable to dispatch of walkers, that was just not possible.

Murphy had watched Lizzie all through the afternoon, up until when he had been relieved of his watch by Tyreese. The girl seemed too happy, she seemed too calm, there was just something not right there.

But when he turned to look at Carol as she slept with Judith on her chest, and Mika’s little hand wrapped around her free one, he couldn’t bear to say anything to her. Not right then, not after everything that had just happened to them.

Murphy closed his eyes as he snuggled himself into Carol’s free side, burrowing his nose in the side of her neck as he put an arm around Judith’s back. Sleep would not come though; he felt his heart clench as he allowed himself to think about Connor for a moment. He felt as tears ran down his cheeks at the mere thought of his brother.

“It’s okay, Muffin,” he opened his eyes, startled as he heard the voice close to his ear. “I’m here, I know it’s not the same, but you are so loved, Murph, just please don’t forget that.”

He took a deep breath, not saying anything just moving so he could be as close to her as he was able as they laid on the cold hard ground. He could feel her breath on his hair, and he closed his eyes allowing her steady breathing lull him into mock sleep.

Murphy didn’t wake until the next morning. He opened his eyes, only to see that he was now lying on his back looking at the sky. It was early enough that they didn’t need to be up yet, but morning had definitely broken through the night.

Mika and Lizzie were still sleeping, and he could see Ty with Judith on his chest asleep on Lizzie’s other side. He moaned softly as everything hurt as he got to his feet, looking around to try and find where Carol was, turning when he heard her low whistle getting his attention.

“Did you get some sleep, love?” Murphy asked as he sat beside her on the boulder she was using to watch over them.

Carol nodded, not saying anything but resting her head on Murphy’s shoulder, grabbing his hand in hers and entwining their fingers. Carol chuckled softly, as she started to caress the ‘Aequitas’ tattoo on his finger immediately, as a reflex.

“Once we find a safe place…” Carol brought Murphy’s hand up and kissed the word on his finger, “I want you to give me one.”

“I thought you had said you would never get one.”

“I want a way to have you with me, no matter what, always.” Her head had returned to his shoulder, and Murphy just laid his over. He would find the things to give her whatever she wanted, anything in this world she wanted he would find for her.

“I want to marry you.” Murphy felt Carol tense beside him as his words reached her ears, but he didn’t move from his position. They had never talked about things like that, back at the prison? it was enough just to be together. Now? There was a need deep inside him that just begged to have the certainty that he belonged to her, in front of whoever was left and in front of God.

“Daryl…”

“The three of us, it’s not like there’s anyone to stop us from making this official whatever way we want to.”

Carol chuckled, making Murphy move away to be able to look down at her. “I just can imagine whomever we meet later on, these are my husbands I married both cause I can’t really tell them apart.”

“Decks was right,” Murphy muttered before chuckling, “you are the biggest asshole out of the four…” He was unable to finish the sentence. The words getting stuck in his throat; the mere idea of them no longer being four was too much to even consider at that moment.

“I will,” Carol said softly, pulling at his hand to get him back into their conversation, “as soon as we find Daryl, we’ll exchange vows between the three of us and you’ll be my husband, and I’ll be your wife.”

Murphy smiled at her, letting her pull him closer so she could give him a soft kiss. He closed his eyes, opening them as he felt her smile against his lips.

“What?”

“Does that will make you and Daryl, brother husbands?”

“Stop.”

.-.-.-.

“Sanctuary for all, community for all. Those that arrive, survive” Mika read as she looked up to the sign at the side of the tracks. Murphy patted her shoulder as he looked at the map under the words the girl had written.

“Termynus?” Mika muttered, frowning before turning to look at Murphy.

“Terminus,” Murphy corrected her, giving her a small smile as she looked up at him with one of her own. “It’s latin, that’s why it sounds funny.”

Carol met his eyes over the girls’ heads, they would make their way there. They would leave Tyreese and the girls in a safe place, before they left to find Daryl.

That was the end plan and they were not willing to change it.

“Let’s go,” Carol said softly as she pushed Lizzie forward so she would start walking once again. They were moving slower than they would have if it had only been them adults, but with three girls, one that had to be carried everywhere, and Tyreese being injured enough to get a low grade fever, they were moving as fast as they could.

“Here, give her to me.” Carol smiled over at Murphy as he took Judith from Tyreese’s arms. They had been lucky she had had some of the antibiotics they had found at the house, Ty’s arm had looked bad enough to cause some real problems later on. Now he just needed to take it as easy as he was able under the circumstances.

“Did you know,” Murphy said getting Mika’s attention as they started to walk again. “That terminus was the original name for Atlanta? And that it’s actually the name of a Roman God?”

Murphy continued to babble as Mika walked beside him, hand in hand with him. Carol had noticed how Mika had started to cling to her or to Murphy over spending time with Lizzie, and that worried her a little.

“He’s good with them…”Carol turned to look at Tyreese as the man caught up with her, “he is more easy going than his brothers.”

Carol chuckled, shaking her head. She didn’t say anything, her mind was as usual trying to process everything that had happened, and sometimes it just felt as if words were just not needed.

“I’m sorry about Connor.”

Those words made her stop in her tracks, her eyes not leaving Murphy’s back as he continued to blabber to the three girls as they walked on.

“He was a good man, he didn’t deserve it.”

“No one does, really.” Carol gave Tyreese a sad smile before she started walking, hurrying to catch up to Murphy. She couldn’t talk about Connor to anyone but Murphy, she couldn’t let herself feel it because if she did she knew Murphy would follow. And they couldn’t go down that rabbit hole, there was too much on their shoulders. They would get their time to mourn him later, once they found Daryl again.

She looked up to the sky briefly as she approached Murphy, smiling sadly as she said a prayer to both Sophia and Connor. At least her girl would get a chance to meet her Connor now, and she just knew they would love each other to pieces.

“What is Murphy lying about now?”

“Oh you did not?” Murphy said in mock outrage, making Mika giggle and Lizzie chuckle, “do you dare, milady, to imply that everything I say is a lie?”

Carol couldn’t help but smirk as Murphy played it over the top, making even Judith giggle and hide her face on his neck. “I do, sir.”

“You wound me…” Murphy dropped Mika’s hand and clutched his heart with his hand, “I’m wounded that you would feel that way milady.”

“Deal with it.”

“Can you believe this? My heart has been broken by the beautiful queen denying me her love.” Carol felt something she couldn’t express as she watched Mika giggle herself silly, and Lizzie even react with joy in her face at their little banter. Even Murphy, his eyes showed a little of his usual liveliness, and she couldn’t help but put her hand on his shoulder balancing on her tiptoes to kiss him softly on the side of the mouth.

“That’s it!” Murphy opened his arm as he swayed Judith from side to side, “the queen has given this poor lad her favor, everything is right now.”

Carol shook her head, walking past them and continuing on, looking down as she felt Lizzie grab her hand as she joined her.

They would continue on, they had to. But the other thing about traveling with three little girls was, they needed to stop every so often.

They had left Tyreese and the girls back at the tracks as they entered the woods looking for water. They could go through the days with minimal food, but water? Water was indispensable.

“I love you, you know that, right?” Murphy said breaking the silence comfortable silence as he pushed some vines away letting her pass through.

“I have never doubted that, Muffin, never.”

“So you know I would never do or say anything to hurt you, right?” Carol stopped walking in front of him, turning to look back, frowning.

“Murph?”

Murphy sighed, letting his head drop for a moment before looking at her. “I think there’s something not quite right with Lizzie.”

“Fuck.” Murphy moved quickly to catch Carol as her knees seemed to give out.

“Love,” Murphy said softly as he put both of them on the ground, feeling as Carol’s arms snaked around him and hugged him close. “I’m sorry.”

“I already knew,” she whispered softly from where she had burrowed her face on his neck. “I’ve known since the prison but I just didn’t want to say anything about it.”

Murphy kissed the side of her head, running his hands up and down her bony back. “What do you want to do?”

“What can we do? Ryan asked me to look after them, I can’t do anything but that.”

“Us.”

Carol pulled back to look at Murphy’s face, wonder on her face.

Murphy smiled softly at her, moving so he could grab one of her hands and entwined their fingers together. “Ryan told you and Connor to look after them, and that means he asked the four of us.”

Carol looked softly at him, before touching his face with her free hand and kissing his lips softly. “I love you, Murph.”

“We’re going to look after those girls, we’re going to talk to Mika so if anything happens she knows what to do, and we’ll get through this.”

“We’ll get through this,” Carol repeated sighing and dropping her head on his shoulder. They sat in the middle of the woods for a few minutes, letting the silence and peace around them calm the storm within their hearts.

The fact that both Lizzie and Mika seemed so happy to see the two of them once they came back, did nothing to lift their broken hearts. Murphy knew something was coming, something that would have an effect on all of them.

He just prayed to God that he could figure out what it was before it broke them.

Tyreese arm was not getting worse, that was at least some good news. They had gotten lucky, mostly because Rick had left Carol with the provisions she had gathered in her bag back in the settlement, which was a lot of painkillers and antibiotics for some reason. Murphy truly had no idea what he would do once they met with Rick Grimes once again.

He was brought out of his murderous thoughts when he felt Mika’s small hand slip into his, he looked down to find the girl grinning up at him. There was something just so good about Mika that he couldn’t help but smile back. The little girl just seemed to know when he was feeling at his lowest and she would make sure that she got his mind out of it.

He refused to let anything happen to her, he would die first before that happened.

“Did Tom Sawyer had a happy ending?” Mika asked Carol looking over her small shoulder at where Carol was walking with Judith on her back. “We never got around to finish it.”

“Well,” Carol gave Murphy a small smile, her eyes softening as she watched Mika swing their hands in between them. “Tom and Huck, they stop Indian Joe and his partner and wind up getting all his gold.”

“So they wind up rich?” The amazement in Mika’s voice made the adults around her chuckle.

“Yep! And widow Douglas adopts Huck.”

“Like you adopted us?” Murphy sees the way Carol’s eyes fill with dread and fear at Mika’s words, and he tugs at the girl’s hand to get her to turn her attention to him instead.

“Well, not exactly, you do get me and Decks instead of just her.” The smile he gets in return from Mika makes his eyes sting a little bit. Carol is right, there’s not a mean bone in that little girl’s body and she must be protected at all costs. “And if she’s widow Douglas, hell, I don’t know how could she be a widow for long.”

Mika giggled as Murphy looked down at her and winked. “Then I’m Huck Finn!”

“I think you’re more like Tom Sawyer,” Lizzie added, a small smile on her face as Mika turned to look at her.

“You’re right, you’re way more like Huck Finn.”

“You know who I can bet was really like Huck Finn as a kid?” Murphy said as he tugged on Mika’s hand to get get attention once more. “Daryl, he once told me he had caught his first rabbit when he was seven! Seven!”

“See, just like Lizzie, she doesn’t get grossed out by dead rabbits.” Carol and Murphy’s eyes met over the girl’s head. They would have to keep an even closer eye on Lizzie from then on. They had apparently already missed a lot.

“I forgot you used to read to them,” Tyreese said from the back of the group.

“She did.” Murphy answered, letting the chatter die. He didn’t know how he felt about Tyreese right then, he was a loose canon especially after what Carol had confessed to him two days before.

It had been already two days? It had seemed like a lot longer then. Two days since Connor had left him, already. “Hey,” Murphy looked up as he heard Carol call out to him, “love you, Muffin.” Her voice was low as she leaned over Mika to kiss him softly on the cheek, those words were only for him and no one else.

She always knew when he needed her the most.

Silence reigned over them once more.

“We should rest for a little bit,” Carol muttered to him and Tyreese as they came out of a curve the tracks had. “We need water, try and catch some food.”

“I can go get water,  Murphy can try to catch the food,” Tyreese offered as he started to put down his bag, moving to take the sleeping baby from Carol’s backpack.

“Ha,” Murphy chuckled as he dropped their remaining bag by the side of the road, “if you want to eat anything, I’m definitely not your man.”

“Murph here is as a good of a hunter as Daryl is a good of a cook.”

“That means I suck,” Murphy finished making a face to Mika and Lizzie, making the youngest girl giggle lightly.

“No, I will go hunt, Murphy will take Mika to get the water, and you two will stay here and rest.” Carol gave Tyreese a look as he started to protest, “you need to rest your arm, Lizzie can help protect Judith if you guys need to.”

Carol ran a hand over Judith’s head as she sat against Tyreese’s chest, giving Lizzie a small smile before the three of them started making their way into the woods.

“Are you really good at hunting, Carol?”

“She had the best teacher ever,” Murphy whispered to the girl, loud enough for Carol to hear and chuckle, “my brother taught her everything he knows.”

“Is she as good as Daryl?”

“Better!”

“That’s a lie,” Carol added as she smiled at the two of them, “no one is as good as Daryl.”

“That is actually true, but she’s still really really good.”

“And on that note, I’m going this way, just saw some rabbit tracks,” Carol said absent minded already starting to follow the rabbit trail, “love ya Muffin.”

Murphy and Mika watched as she walked away from them, already looking for their dinner.

“Why does she call you Muffin?” Mika asked innocently as they resumed their walking.

“Because she says I’m as sweet and fluffy as one.”

The girl giggled again, making a discontented noise as she dropped one of the water bottles they were going to fill. “You should have brought Lizzie, she can carry more than I can.”

“But I wanted to bring you with me.” The way Mika looked at him, Murphy knew not a lot of people chose to spent time with her over her sister, and it made something hurt inside of him.

“I know a thing or two about having older siblings that get all the attention.” Mika seemed enraptured by his words and he couldn’t help but look up to the sky for a moment. What he was saying wasn’t completely true, Connor did get a little more of attention than he did he always had. But it was mostly because it was usually Connor who came up with whatever they were going to do, he usually just followed him.

“It isn’t like Lizzie does it on purpose, at least she didn’t before…” Mika said sadly, kicking a stone away looking up sharply as something rustled among the leaves were it had landed. Without saying anything, the two of them just avoided that area and continued walking.

“What do you mean?”

“Is just that dad would take her to her doctor’s appointments and they would spend a lot of time together.”

“I’m sorry about your da,” Murphy said softly as she put a hand on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry about Connor, he was really sweet.”

“That’s cause you didn’t know him when we were wee lads,” Murphy took a deep breath as he continued, “he used to do all sorts of things to me, but I would never tell Ma.” There was a pang on his heart as he lied about his relationship with Connor, but there was a lot more a stake right then than the memory of his brother. He needed to tell Mika to be careful but he just couldn’t outright tell her, could he?

“Why?”

“I don’t know, I guess I was scared of him.”

“Did he hurt you?”

“He did a couple of times, he stopped when I started fighting back.”

“But it was your brother, I wouldn’t want to hurt Lizzie.” There was something in the way Mika said those words that just made Murphy wonder if something had already happened, or deep inside the little girl beside him had the same fears him and Carol had about her sister.

“And I would have never wanted to hurt Connor, not for real.” Murphy stopped, putting a knee on the ground so he was able to look up at Mika’s eyes. “But when I fought back, it was because he was really hurting me. He might not have meant it, he might have thought it was just a game, but it was really hurting me.”

“Was he mad at you for doing that?” She avoided his eyes, and he knew then. He knew he had done the right thing, even if it meant desecrating Connor’s memory. His brother in heaven would forgive him if it meant saving the little girl.

“For a little while, but then he realized that he had cause me pain and asked for me to forgive him.”

Mika nodded, and Murphy stood up. They continued on their way to get water.

“Look!” Mika said, joy in her voice as she pointed at something. Murphy followed her little finger to see a house in the middle of the forest.

The smile on Mika’s face warmed his heart. “My mom used to say,” she said softly as she grabbed his hand pulling him along, “that everything works out the way it’s supposed to.”

Murphy chuckled shaking his head as he let her lead him on. He was going to protect this girl’s innocence as long as he drew breath. Carol was not going to lose another child, especially not one that reminded her of Sophia so much.

He might not be able to give her her daughter back, but he could take care of the ones she had right now. The ones _they_ had.

-.-.-.

He had seen Mika’s eyes widening when they caught up again with Carol, a skinned rabbit hanging from her hand as they walked back to the tracks were he could see Lizzie and Tyreese still waiting for them.

“We have to eat, young one,” Murphy muttered as he pulled Mika and hugged her to his side as he used his other arm to bring Carol close to his free side. “Good catch, love.”

“Not as good as Decks, but it’s something.”

“We found a house,” Mika added, her smile causing Carol to smile back. “And Murphy cleared it, so we can go stay there.”

“In my defense, love,” Murphy said dropping Mika’s hand as he walked a couple of steps away from Carol and her disapproving look, giving her his most innocent one. “There was a fence and I only cleared the grounds around the house, not inside.”

“You better,” Carol murmured as she hurried her steps and walked past him, pinching his side as she did so.

“Naughty.” They shared a look, soft in comparison to what it would have been a few days before. They were trying to pretend they were doing better than they really were, but they had to. Carol smiled as Mika ran the last few yards to reach Lizzie and Ty, already telling them about what they had found.

“We can use it to rest for a couple of days,” Murphy murmured as they watched as the others started to get everything ready to move. “Ty and Judy need a good night rest, we’ll go looking for him tomorrow.”

“I’m not afraid of that, I know we’ll find him.” Her hand took his, entwining their fingers. Murphy nodded, raising their hands and kissing the back of hers before dropping it and moving to grab the backpack from Mika.

Carol watched him go. He was still looking paler than she liked, three days before he had been burning up; and it wasn’t even forty-eight hours since she had almost ran him over. He was hurting, and not only physically.

Rest would be good for all of them. And it was true what she had told him, she trusted Daryl. She knew he was fine and he would find them. That was one of her certainties. Daryl would always find them.   

Carol took Judith as the girl put out her arms for her to hug her as Ty got close enough for her to do so. The little girl immediately burrowed her face against her neck, and Carol closed her eyes for a moment as her heart skipped a beat.

“I love you, Care.” Murphy muttered as he dropped a kiss on the side of her head before he moved to usher the two girls along towards where they had found what would become their temporary home.

The walk took them around twenty minutes, Judy had fallen asleep in her arms, her heavy weight making her already tired arms ache. She could feel her eyes water as they saw the house for the first time from afar.

She could have seen her and her boys living in a house like that if things had been different. Daryl would have had the woods so nearby that he would have been able to shoot a deer from their own backyard. The other two would be happy as long as Daryl was.

“What are these?” Mika’s sweet voice brought her back from her musings, looking to see about what she was talking about.

“Those are pecans.”

“Pecans,” Murphy muttered under his breath, a little smirk on his face as he stole a look at Carol; the smile getting a little bigger at the mock glare he received from her at him mocking her pronunciation.

“Uhhh-” Mika dropped Murphy’s hand to crouch and start picking up some, “I love pecans.”

“Here,” Murphy murmured as he took two of the pecans from Mika, pressing one against the other making a face at the girl as they heard the shells crack. “You get one, and I get one.”

Mika nodded, looking down at her pecan and starting to peel it. Murphy winked at Lizzie as he looked up, throwing the one he had kept for himself to her.

“We’re going to stay here for little while,” Carol said to the girls as Murphy moved to open the made up barbwire fence for them to pass.

“We’re still going to Terminus, right?” Lizzie asked as she picked at her pecan, not looking up from her task at hand.

Murphy and Carol shared a look, it was the first time they had heard the girl somewhat excited about something. That was something at least. “Yes, lass, we are.” Murphy turned to close the fence, “we’re just taking a breather, Judy needs some sleep as well as the big man over there.”

Ty gave Murphy a look, turning to look at Carol while cradling his arm. If Murphy didn’t know better he would have thought the big man had the sights set on her, but he was more intelligent than that. Or at least he trusted what they had way more than that.

“Maybe one night, or two,” Carol said as she squinted against the afternoon sun as it hit her in the face when looking back at them, “I saw a deer that maybe we can catch to eat, and the pecans.”

“And a well with clean water, to drink and wash up,” Murphy added.

“And this fence, as much help as it will be.”

“We could put on some snares, like Decks taught you,” Murphy said as they started to walk towards the house, with him at the back of the group.

“Do we have to?” Mika asked softly, as Tyreese started to take off his backpack motioning for the two girls to sit down in the bench in the yard.

“We gotta eat, princess,” Murphy said softly as he took Judith from Carol’s arms after taking off his pack, cooing softly as Judith started fussing at the change of arms.

“We could only eat the pecans?”

Carol chuckled softly, placing a hand on Mika’s cheek caressing it softly. “We can’t survive on pecans only, Mika.”

“It’s the circle of life,” Lizzie added as Murphy passed Judith to her once they seemed to be ready to go clear the house.

The next words out of Lizzie’s mouth made Murphy stop cold as he walked up the stairs.

“The deer eat grass, we eat the deer and then the walkers eat us.”

“Fuck,” Murphy muttered shaking his head slightly to Carol as she looked worried at him. “I’ll tell you later,” he murmured as he looked inside the house through the window. He looked over his shoulder at where the three girls were sitting and felt the dread inside him grow. What were they going to do?

Carol knocked on the door, loudly. “If there’s one in there, it’s moving really slow.” Carol looked at the girls before returning her attention to the door. “We should clear room by room, stay together. Girls you sit tight. Mika, Lizzie has Judith so pull out your gun you’re going to be the one guarding them.” Murphy nodded at her, motioning to Tyreese with his head to follow her as she opened the door and entered the house.

“You two yell for me if anything happens,” Murphy said he entered the house behind Tyreese.

They were on the third room when he heard the first small yelp. He didn’t wait to hear from Carol when he was already running towards the door. He was almost there when the first shot rang out and he was sure his heart was going to beat out of his chest when he jumped over the porch banister shooting the walker trying to get to the girls as he did.

He just spared one second to make sure it was the only one before moving on Mika. He took her gun, throwing it away before he pulled the trembling little girl into his arms hiding his face in her face to keep her from seeing how shaken he was.

He could hear Carol in the background trying to calm both Lizzie and Judith but he had no other thoughts but the girl in his arms. “You were so brave, sweetheart, so so brave.” He could feel as tears soaked his shirt from where she had pressed her face on his shirt, as her arms and legs wrapped around him. She didn’t want to let go, and neither did he.

“She’s okay?” Murphy raised his head when he felt Carol’s hand on his back.

“Yeah-” Murphy sniffed, giving her a watery smile, “we’re okay.”

“Good,” Carol answered softly, moving to hug both of them at the same time.

“I’m good,” Mika said, still sniffling as she started to unwrap herself from Murphy. Murphy just smiled, helping her down before he watched together with Carol as she moved to approach her sister.

“I’m sorry I yelled at you Lizzie, but I still think you are wrong.” Carol entwined her hand with Murphy as they continued to watch as the little sister comforted the older one. “Just look at the flowers like they taught us, and count.

“One” “One” “Two” “Two”

“Do you know what she meant with the yelling?” Murphy asked Carol softly, so only she would hear.

“No, but at least it’s a good start.” At Carol’s questioning look he continued, “she stood up for herself instead of letting Lizzie walk all over her.”

“I’m worried,” Carol murmured as she rested her side against Murphy. Murphy could only nod. He was dead worried too. But at least they had cleared this place, they could have a little calm and quiet before continuing on his brother’s search.

-.-.-

The night fell sooner than expected upon them. Carol had managed to find some spices and some potatoes and had made them a rabbit stew that he had even gotten to eat seconds. He was now lying down on the dusty rug, with Judith sleeping on a crib they had found behind him, while Mika and Tyreese went over the rooms looking for things they could use after they moved.

Every so often, Murphy felt his eyes going from where he was watching over Judith to where Carol was sitting down at the table cracking pecans with Lizzie. He hadn’t had a chance to talk with Carol, between her cooking, him carrying water for all of them to wash, Tyreese needing them to clean his wound.

But he knew he was not going to sleep that night, between the need to keep an eye out for any walkers, to the need of watching over the dangers within the walls? It was going to be a long night.

“You still upset?” Carol asked Lizzie, as she cracked open a pecan and put it to the side.

Lizzie continued doing the puzzle she and Mika had started before the excitement of the day had beaten the little girl. “Sometimes I don’t understand, but I try to ma’am. I am.”

Murphy couldn’t help but smile as he heard the heavy steps of Mika as she rushed towards him, dropping on her knees beside him as she practically pushed a red headed doll to his face. “Look what I found!” The joy in her voice was contagious and he couldn’t help but chuckle as he moved to sit up. “I’m going to name her Griselda Gunderson.”

“Awww princess, I think she looks like a Eleonor to me, she’s a redhead after all.”

Mika frowned, looking down at the doll before pulling her into her arms. “Do you really think she looks like an Eleonor.”

“I knew a redhead called Eleonor once, we used to call her Nel.” Murphy watched as Mika started to play with the doll, her shadows moving across the walls. “She had a beautiful smile.”

“Was it more beautiful than Carol’s?”

The innocence of the question made Murphy bark out a laugh, making both Lizzie and Carol turn to look at him at once. “No one is more beautiful than Carol, princess.” He winked at Carol making her blush in the low light.

“On that note, and thanks to Mac over there, we have enough water until tomorrow I think.” Tyreese threw a wet cloth to Murphy, smiling when the older man complained about it. “Now we just need to bag us some deer.”

“Then tomorrow we get some.”

“I don’t think your hunting skills are that advanced, do you love?” Carol threw a closed pecan to Murphy, who caught it and crushed it between the palms of his hands.

“Shut it, MacManus.”

“What’s wrong?” Mika asked Tyreese, who just stood there, looking from Murphy to Carol and back.

“I’m just not used to this,” Tyreese said concerned, a frown on his face.

“Used to what?” Lizzie asked over her shoulder as stopped midway through cracking the pecan.

“Being in a living room, being in a house.”

“Yeah,” Mika looked up at him, “so relax.” Murphy couldn’t help but chuckle, putting a hand on top of her head and pulling her close to drop a kiss before letting her go back to her game. He shared a knowing look with Tyreese.

Silence fell upon them, used by now to the need of it while they had been on the road.

“We should live here,” Mika said suddenly, looking from Tyreese to Murphy, hope in her eyes.

“Mika, princess…” Murphy said, sighing a he sat up straighter looking to Carol only to find her nodding softly at him. They needed to talk about this, it was something that needed to be done. He looked back to see her looking at him in rapture, “we can’t stay here for long, we still need to find my brother and Tyreese sister.”

“Why?” Everyone turned to look at Lizzie as she asked without stopping her cracking, “why should we leave, they’re dead anyway.”

“Lizzie.” Murphy felt like something had grabbed his heart and was squeezing tight, he felt as his eyes started burning and he was sure he had not taken any air until he felt Mika’s little hand touch his. Carol’s voice had been stern, and her eyes were cold as ice as she looked at the girl sitting beside her. “Daryl is alive, Sasha could very well have escaped too.”

“But how can you be so sure that he is?”

“We just do.” The certainty in Carol’s voice did give Murphy a respite, her eyes met his over the girl’s shoulder and he knew she believed it completely. He could not start imagining a world where he wouldn’t find his brother, he refused to even think about such world.

“And if he’s one of them? Then will you believe me?”

“Lizzie, stop!” The three adults turned to look at Mika, who was now standing next to Murphy, fuming. “Don’t you see you’re upsetting Murphy, stop saying that, Daryl is alive and he’s going to find us!”

“But…” Lizzie said, real confusion in her face as she finally looked at Murphy who was looking pale and breathing faster than usual. Her eyes moved from him to Carol at her side, that didn’t look in much better conditions. “I’m sorry.”

“I’ll be right back,” Murphy murmured as silence fell upon them once more, rapidly standing up and leaving the room. Carol just shot Tyreese a look before she followed him.

She caught up just as he opened the door to step outside.

“He’s fine,” Carol said softly as she wrapped her arm across Murphy’s back as he leaned against the banister trying to take deep breaths. “Try to breath, Muffin, easy, easy.”

“I can’t…” Murphy rasped as he turned towards her, closing his eyes as he started to feel as everything started to turn around him.

“You have to, love,” Carol moved to put her hands on his cheeks making so he would be looking at her, “I need you to breath, come on, hear my voice.” She moved one of her hands to grasp one of his, putting it against her chest. “Try to breath along with me, please love.”

Murphy nodded, slowly starting to calm down his breathing. His hands were shaking, and he felt tingling in his hands and lips as slowly he started to be able to breathe more calmly.

“He’s not dead, he’s out there looking for us, he’s out there and we’re going to find him.” Carol’s voice was strong and sure, and Murphy sighed before he pulled her into his arms.

“I miss him so much.” Carol knew who he was talking about even without him saying who ‘him’ was.

“I know Murph, so do I.”

“He would make fun of me for almost passing out, he would have called me a pussy.” Murphy chuckled as he dropped a kiss to Carol’s cheek as he pulled back to be able to see her; well as much as he could with only the moonlight as light source.

“You aren’t.” Murphy smiled softly at her, before moving to kiss her softly on the lips. “We should go back inside.”

Murphy allowed her to lead him back inside, “I don’t think I can handle being in the same room as her right now, love-” he had stopped the two of them just inside, “I’ll stay here and guard us, you get those girls to bed.”

Carol nodded, watching as he dropped himself in a chair by the door, his guns at the ready. “You know I love you, right?”

“Damn right you do, I’m a lovable bastard.”

-.-.-.-

Murphy had fallen asleep when dark sky had started to get lighter. Carol had come out from the living room, bed hair and all and had told him to get some sleep at last. He had stolen a couple of kisses from her, before he moved his ass into the one bedroom that she had been using. The one bedroom that had all three little girls in it.

He hadn’t even noticed when Carol had came in half an hour later and gotten Judith who had started to cry, nor when the girls had gotten up, with Mika giggling as she saw him drooling into the pillow.

What he had noticed was the first terrified scream of Carol as she ran out of the house, it had taken him less than five seconds to be up and running behind her, not even taking time to put on his boots before he had his gun in his hand and the safety off.

He felt like his heart was again in his throat as he hit the ground running, seeing Carol on her knees over a walker’s body.

“Are you okay? Were you bit?” He didn’t pay attention to anyone but her, pulling her up and running his hands all over her frantically.

“I’m okay, Murph.”

“Why did you do that?!” Lizzie yelled at them, tears running down her cheeks as she looked at the dead walker before looking up at Carol, “she was my friend, she was playing with me and you killed her!”

Murphy felt rage start amassing in his chest, and his hands started to shake without him noticing.

“She wanted to kill you!” Murphy yelled, opening his hands as he felt the need to kick something. “She was going to take a bite right out of ya and munch on you until there was nothing left!”

“I was going to lead her away!” The two of them were yelling now, and Carol couldn’t do anything but watch.

“You could have gotten Carol hurt! You could have gotten her killed!”

“It’s the same thing, so you killed her!”

“Damn right I did!”

“It’s the same thing! What if I just kill you, what if I just kill her!”

“Lizzie.” Carol said softly, as she moved to stand between the two yelling persons. “Lizzie.”Her voice was calm, as she made sure her back was flush to Murphy as she felt him breathing hard. One of his arms moved to wrap her around the waist, as he rested his forehead against her shoulder.

He was trembling badly, and she could feel that he was crying. But she needed to make sure the little girl was fine first.

“You don’t understand,” Lizzie kept on repeating softly as she looked down at the ground, breathing faster than Carol liked.

“You didn’t have to, you didn’t have to…” Lizzie raised her eyes to look at Carol, hatred on them as she looked at Murphy who was still clinging onto Carol’s back. “She didn’t want to hurt you and you killed her! You just killed her!”

“Stop,” Murphy said as he raised his head from Carol’s shoulder. He could feel how tense she was, and he knew she would never do anything to hurt the girl in front of her. But he wasn’t about to let the girl hurt her either.

“She didn’t want to hurt anybody, she was my friend and you just killed her!”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU LITTLE SHIT!”

Lizzie was clearly not expecting Murphy to yell at her, the distraction pausing her tirade for a moment. “You are going to shut the fuck up and get the fuck up inside the house before I fucking do it myself.” He could feel how Carol was trembling in his arms, and he was sure that if he made her turn to look at him, there would be tears in her eyes. And no one, no one made her cry in his presence.

“She was my friend…” Lizzie said her voice low before she fell on her knees and started sobbing over the body of the walker. Murphy didn’t wait another second before he turned Carol and brought her into his arms.

Things were getting worse, and much faster than he thought they would.

-.-.-

“Was Tyreese too bummed out because we were going to leave him on nanny duty again?” Carol asked, as she shoved Murphy with her shoulder as the two of them walked away from the house, their hands busy carrying the buckets they were going to use to get the water, to hold hands.

“I think at this point, he would rather do that than face any munchers.” Murphy said softly, giving her a little smile as he shoved back.

“I’m sorry for having lost my temper with Lizzie,” he murmured, looking down at the floor feeling ashamed at having a twelve year old get the best out of him.

“You were distressed, Muffin, I don’t want you worrying about that.”

“You still love me even if I pick fights with teenagers?”

“I still love you even if you pick your nose and then eat the boogers like I know you do.”

“I still say that’s not true, that was in fact Daryl and not me.”

“Shut up.” The fact that he had gotten her to smile again after that was a triumph on its own.

“I am truly afraid for Lizzie,” Carol said later as Murphy was pumping the well for water, “I think either you or I should always be on the lookout in case she does something.”

“Should we let Ty know what’s going on?”

“I don’t think he would believe us…” Carol grunted as she started walking back now with the full buckets, “nor do I think he could do something if it comes to that.”

“And could you, love?” Carol stopped at Murphy’s question, turning her blue eyes to him.

“I don’t know,” she softly confessed before the two of them started their trek back.

They were already seeing the house when they heard the first scream.

“For fucks sake!” Murphy yelled as they dropped the buckets and the two of them started running towards the front of the house. The front of the house that had a small herd of walkers approaching the fence while Mika was on the ground with one of them too close for comfort.

Murphy just started shooting. He shot the one near Mika first, looking long enough to make sure it had dropped before he started shooting the others. He knew Carol was at his right, and he wondered where Tyreese was before a third gun joined the two of them.

After that it was rather quick. One after the other the walkers dropped outside the gates, he felt more than he saw as Mika crawled her way to him before she stood up and started shooting her gun. His first instinct once all the walkers had dropped was to look at her for injuries, before turning to look at Carol.

“I need to teach you how to shoot better, princess,” Murphy murmured as he put an arm around Mika’s shoulders pulling her into a hug.

“It’s okay,” Carol said in turn to Lizzie, before pulling the girl to her. “You did it.”

Murphy looked warily as his woman hugged the tall girl, looking how shaken they both look as she did so.

“Let’s go back into the house, we can have some lunch.” Tyreese said as he looked warily at the walkers’ bodies scattered around. Murphy couldn’t help but notice how shaken he looked, so he patted his back as they all turned to do as he had said.

“I can teach you how to cook something,” Carol said “something sweet for dessert.”

“Is it sweeter than me?” Murphy asked, raising his eyebrows up and down trying to defuse the tense situation.

“Nothing is sweeter than you, Muffin.”

“See…” Murphy hip checked Mika softly “I told you that was why she called me that.”

The girl’s laughter made him breath easier for a moment.

-.-.-.-

Murphy woke up to the smell of something sweet in the air. He had been sent back to bed after the second time he yawned while helping Carol and the girls crack even more pecans, his sleep had after all been cut short by the little incident with Lizzie and the walker that morning.

“Afternoon,” Murphy murmured, smiling as Judith immediately stretched out her little arms asking him to take her into his from where she was in Carol’s.

“Sleep well?” Murphy dropped a kiss on top of Carol’s head, before sitting beside her on the couch. The house was silent, apparently the only people either awake or there being the three of them.

“Not at well as when you’re sleeping beside me.” Carol couldn’t help but smile and shake her head at his cheeky grin. She was glad he was still trying, that after everything he was still there.

“Here,” she murmured as she fed him some of the pecan dessert she and the girls were cooking, giving him a soft kiss just after.

“That’s good,” he said, smiling when she glared at him for speaking with his mouth full.

“I spoke with Lizzie before she went to take a nap,” Carol said softly, as she continued to share her sweets with him, “and she says she knows what she has to do now.”

“Do you believe her?”

“I don’t know…” there was a wariness in her person, his her voice that Murphy hated with all of his heart. He hated to see her as defeated as she looked right then, it broke his heart to know that there wasn’t anything he could actually do to help. “I want to.”

“We need to go get water again, and I need to go check the snares to see if anything got trapped in them.”

“We’ll all go,” Carol agreed as she ran a hand up and down Judith’s back where she had fallen asleep over Murphy’s chest. “You and Ty will get the water, and I’ll go check the snares.”

“Oi, you’re leaving me the hard work.”

“Of course Muffin, after all aren’t you my big strong fiance?”

“You’re awful woman, but well I did choose to marry you knowing that.”

“You eat your boogers, Murph.”

“It wasn’t me, it was Declan!”

-.-.-.

Tyreese started talking as soon as they watched Carol walk away from them towards where she had left the snares yesterday.

“Do you really believe what you said last night? About Sasha possibly being alive?”

Murphy looked at the man walking beside him, he looked ragged and weary, and Murphy understood somewhat of what he was going through. “I do,” Murphy said as he leaned down to pick up a pecan, only to throw it away a moment later. “I’m sure Daryl is out there, and it’s not that bonkers to think Sasha and the rest could be too.”

“We had thought about leaving you and the girls in Terminus, before going out there to look for Daryl.” Murphy sighed, banging the buckets together as they reached the well. “We might have even thought of leaving you guys here, and go out there looking for him nearby first…”

“But not after this morning?” Murphy raised his head from where he was looking as he pumped water to see Tyreese looking pensive, “I saw you through the window, and well… I heard you.”

“Fuck, yes.” Murphy sighed, leaning on the lever as Tyreese changed the buckets before starting again, “there’s something wrong with Lizzie, she just doesn’t appear to fully understand what the walkers are and what danger they are to us.”

“I’m really sorry about your brother.” Murphy smiled sadly at Tyreese.

“I’m really sorry about your girlfriend.”

“I dream about her, every night.” They changed the buckets, “and sometimes I wake up and I forget she’s not there.” Murphy didn’t look at him, hearing as his voice broke. “Is it like that to you?”

“No.” Murphy looked up, sighing as he dropped the lever, “I can’t talk about that, I can’t.” He moved away, picking up the two buckets that were supposed to be his.

“I wish we could stay here,” Tyreese said changing the subject, moving to pick up the biggest two buckets and starting on their way back. “I’m not sure I’m ready to be around more people.”

“We need the numbers, Sham.” Murphy gave him a small shrug, putting on a front as he spied Carol walking towards them as they made their way back, “and maybe Sasha is at Terminus by now.”

“Maybe she is.”

“Well hello,” Murphy said visibly brightening when he saw Carol waiting for them closer to the house, a couple of rabbits hanging from a thread over her shoulder. “Looks like you did learned something from baby brother, didn’t you?”

“You could say that.”

The three of them chuckled as they finally stepped towards the small trail leading them back to the front of the house.

They were just turning when they heard Mika’s scream. Water and rabbits were forgotten the moment the three of them started running.

“Lizzie! Lizzie, no!” Mika screamed as she tried to keep her sister away from her. Lizzie had Mika on her back, her little hand trying to keep her sister’s knife away from her neck, away from her.

“Mika!” Murphy screamed as they ran closer.

“Murphy!” Mika screamed as she kept on trying to keep Lizzie from bringing the knife down, crying out in pain as the knife sliced her cheek open. Murphy ran faster, knowing that Carol was behind him every step of the way.

“Stay back!” Lizzie yelled, scrambling to her feet, putting herself between Murphy and Mika while pulling out her gun. She was standing with her legs apart, her hands up pointing the gun right at Murphy’s chest. She was not trembling, her bloody knife forgotten beside where Mika lay bleeding and crying.

“Shut up, Mika!” Lizzie yelled, turning her face a little to see her little sister, her face snapping back towards Murphy as she felt him take a step closer to her. “Stand back! I will shoot you!”

“Lizzie, darling,” Carol said softly, as she moved to stand next to Murphy. “Come on, darling, put the gun down, you know who we are, you know us.”

“Get back!” Lizzie’s voice broke as she moved her gun from Murphy to Carol.

“Hey!” Murphy said, taking a step forward, trying to put himself between the gun and Carol.

A shot rang out, echoed only by Mika's resounding screams.

“What the fuck?!” Murphy said, looking at his shoulder now stained in red. “You shot me?!” 

“Stand back!” Lizzie eyes never moved from Murphy, who was still looking shocked with the front of his shirt quickly staining red. “I’m going to show you, I’m going to show you how wrong you are.”

“Lizzie, stop this right now!” Murphy growled, his hand from his uninjured arm pressing against his wound, hissing as it made the pain unbearable. 

“No!” Lizzie took a step back, stumbling over Mika’s legs where her sister was still lying on the ground sobbing. Her gun moved from Murphy to Mika, making the girl sob even harder. 

“Murphy,” Mika sobbed as she turned her terrified eyes to look first at the bleeding man, and then to Carol who was standing just behind him. 

“Shut up!” Lizzie screamed as her hands shook, her gun moving once again when Murphy took another step closer to them. 

“Mika, princess,” Murphy’s voice was calm, as he kept his eyes on the little girl on the ground, “just look at me, okay, just look at me.” He mustered a small smile for her, “you’re going to be okay.”

“I will shoot.” Lizzie’s voice was hard, as she looked at Murphy dead in the eyes. And Murphy believed her. 

“Lizzie, please,” Carol’s broken voice sounded from behind Murphy. He didn’t dare break eye contact with the girl that had them in her gun sights, but his heart was shattering with each tearful waver in her plea. “Please don’t do this.”

Everything happened so fast after that. Murphy darted forward, trying to get to Lizzie and her gun before she could react. Two shots rang out one after the other. 

“Murph! No Murphy!” Carol’s heartbreaking cries made the baby, who had calmed down in Tyreese’s arms, start crying again. 

Carol dropped her gun as she fell to her knees, scrambling to reach Murphy. He was lying face down, groaning as she pushed him onto his back. “Murphy, please, Murphy,” she begged, her voice thick with fear and the pain of unshed tears

“I’m okay,” he rasped. The side of head was pouring blood, but he opened his blue eyes and looked right into hers. “I’m okay, see.” He was pale, almost as much as he had been when sick, and the wound on his shoulder was still bleeding profusely. 

“Oh Murph,” Carol said as she started crying, her cries drowned a moment later by the cries of another. 

“Lizzie! Lizzie come on!” The two of them turned to look a little further ahead, only to find Mika slamming her good arm into Lizzie’s chest. “Lizzie! You can’t do this!”

“Go,” Murphy groaned at Carol, as he pushed her hands away with his good one to make pressure on his own wound. “Go, now!”

“Carol?” Mika asked, her big blue eyes looking up at Carol as she crawled to where the two of them were lying down. Carol couldn’t say anything, she was crying too hard but she put her hands over the Mika’s were Lizzie’s wound was. The girl had been a bad shot, but Carol wasn’t.

“You’re going to see now,” Lizzie said softly, looking pale and her eyes barely opening. “You’re g-”

“Lizzie?” Mika asked softly, pulling her hand away from her sister’s chest touching her cheek coating it with her own blood. “Lizzie?”

Carol could only sob harder as Mika started shaking her sister’s corpse. “Lizzie! Lizzie! Lizzie! Stop it! Stop it!”

The sound of someone’s steps made Carol look up from where her hands were still on Lizzie’s chest, stained with blood. Tyreese was standing there, crying as he looked down at the scene in front of him. He gently shook her head, moving to wrap his big hands around Mika’s waist pulling her up and away from the body.

Mika yelled for her sister all the way back into the house were Tyreese kept trying to calm her down.

Silence fell upon them, silence only broken by Carol’s renewed sobs.

“I’m so sorry…” Carol moved her hands from Lizzie’s chest to touch her cheeks, closing her eyes. Leaving a trail of blood wherever she touched. “I’m so sorry.”

“Love…” Carol jumped when she felt Murphy touching her back softly, “we have to do it.”

Carol nodded, turning and throwing her arms around Murphy as she sobbed into his chest. Murphy grunted at the impact, but otherwise tried to hug her as close as he could. He let her cry for a few moments, before he pushed her back.

“I love you,” Murphy said, not caring about the fact that they were both covered in blood putting his hand on her cheek and bringing her closer to drop a small kiss on her lips. “No matter what, I love you.”

Carol nodded, taking a deep breath as she turned pulling her knife out of her scabbard. She took a last look at the girl lying in front of her, the girl she was supposed to take care of as her own. And she felt another sob threatening to overcome her. Another girl she failed, another girl lost because of her.

“Don’t…” the sound of Murphy’s voice at her ear grounded her, allowing her mind to focus on the now instead of the past. The girl in front of her wasn’t her Sophia, she was Lizzie; Lizzie who she had to stop to save her family. Lizzie who would not have stopped otherwise. Lizzie who had shot her Murphy.

Murphy gently guided her hand with her knife to Lizzie’s head, and together they made sure the little girl would find peace.

-.-.-

The only sound in the room was that of Mika’s gently breathing as she laid asleep next to Murphy on the bed. Carol wouldn’t even meet Murphy’s eyes as she sewed up the hole left in his shoulder from where Lizzie had shot him.

The bullet had gotten stuck in his clavicle, making her have to open more and get it out. He did not only have now a bullet wound, but also a broken clavicle.

“Bloody headshot, this thing is bleeding worse than a pig.” Carol didn’t say anything, she just continued to work on his shoulder, cutting the thread as she finished.

Murphy started fidgeting where he was, trying not to look at Carol, but finding his eyes following her every move.

“I’m going to be okay, Muffin,” Carol murmured absentmindedly as she moved his head so she could see with the little light that they still had left. “I need to finish cleaning this, stitch it up and go help Tyreese with…”

She didn’t need to specify what Tyreese was doing. It had taken them forcing Mika to drink some benadryl for her to get drowsy enough for Carol to be able to stitch her up. She had been lucky, she had fought back and Lizzie had missed anything vital by probably inches. Her left arm had to be immobilized against her body, her wound stitched as well as the one in her cheek.

She would not only carry the psychological scars of what had happened, but the physical ones would be visible for everyone to see.

Murphy followed her eyes, to where he knew the little girl slept. “She will be okay, whatever happened she has us.”

The sound of Carol taking the vase in the night stand and throwing it against the wall didn’t made Murphy blink. “I killed her sister.”

“You saved her life...” Murphy said as he sat up in the bed, taking Carol’s hands in his and pulling her so she was standing in the middle of his legs. “You saved my life.”

Carol sighed, putting her arms around his head and leaning down until she could touch his with hers. “I’m sorry, I know is just…”

“I understand.” Murphy moved so he could look up at her, “I love you, no matter what just please remember that.”  

“You’re getting me all dirty,” Carol murmured as she ran a hand through his hair on his ’healthy’ side.

“Oh baby, not with a child in the room.”

Murphy couldn’t help but smile as she heard her chuckle and mutter ‘stop’.

-.-.-

Carol had forced Murphy to take not only some painkillers from her stash, but also some Benadryl so he would get some rest. She had stayed with him until he had fallen asleep, wounds stitched and cleaned.

They hadn’t needed words as they layed in bed together next to their young charge. The next few days were going to be difficult, how could this child take the death of her only family member at the hands of Carol? How would Mika take that she had been saved from dying at the hands of her beloved sister?

Only once she made sure Murphy was truly asleep she had dared to leave his side. Tyreese had been taking care of Judith since they had left him alone, and now it was time for Lizzie to put to the ground. They couldn’t wait any longer, it could make it even more dangerous to them than it already was.

Her and Tyreese didn’t say anything, the only sound being that one of her shoveling dirt as he watched. The pain in her back feeling like penance for her act. The utter heartbreak she felt just a minimal part of her punishment for having taken a sister away from Mika.

She had gone back to check on her patients as soon as they finished, both her still asleep unaware of anything happening around them.

Tyreese was sitting in the small table when she got back. The night had fallen upon them, darkness surrounding the small oil lamp sitting in the middle of the room.

“I have something I need to tell you,” Carol whispered as she moved to sit across him on the table. The quietness having an eerie vibe around them.

Tyreese looked across the table, watching as the shadows across Carol’s face.

“It was Connor and I…” Tyreese blinked, giving Carol a look as he tried to make sense of what she had just said to him. “We were the ones that killed Karen and David.”

Her eyes quickly fell on the tabletop, unable to maintain eye contact with the man she stole everything from. “Karen-” Carol stopped to take a deep breath, trying to keep her feelings at bay to continue talking, “she had stopped breathing when Connor did it, David was barely doing so.”

Her hand was tracing imaginary pattern on the table, not feeling brave enough to see the look on her friend’s face. “We had to stop their suffering, we had to try and stop the spreading.”

“Is that why you burned them?”

Carol nodded, tears falling down her cheeks as she finally looked up at him. “It wasn’t Lizzie-” her voice broke at the mention of the dead girl, “it wasn’t a stranger, it was us.”

Tyreese couldn’t look at her, see the pain in her eyes, as his own heart broke again and again.

“I understand if you can’t forgive us, if you can’t stay with us…” Carol continued as Tyreese avoided looking at her, “we’ll go first thing in the morning, we’ll continue looking for everyone, and we’ll tell Sasha where you are if you want to stay here.”

Tyreese gripped the sides of the small table so hard his knuckles were white. “Did she knew what was happening? Was she scared?”

Carol shook her head no.

“Was it quick?”

“Yes.”

Carol could hear Tyreese’s pants of breath as he tried to calm himself into not doing what he wanted to do.

“We had to make a decision, they didn’t suffer and we prayed for them.” Carol’s fingers tapped on the table softly, betraying her nervousness. “I was on my way to tell everyone when you find out, and then, everything just exploded.”

Tyreese nodded, finally looking at the woman sitting with him on the table. He knew this woman, this wasn’t a stranger. This was the woman that had cared for him and the girls since they had found them in the forest. This was the woman who had been friends with him and Sasha, the woman whose husbands to be where his friends.

He loved this woman like a part of his family, and he knew her.

“I forgive you.” Carol’s head snapped up, looking at Tyreese with a frown on her face. “I know you Carol, I believe you and Connor wouldn’t have done it if there had been any other way.”

“We have to live with it, with what happened here…” the two of them were crying now, “but I forgive you.”

Carol nodded, her face still in a grimace as one of her hands wiped the tears from her cheeks.

“I don’t need to stay,” Tyreese whispered, “I can’t stay.”

-.-.-.-.

There was a certain grogginess that came with sleeping under the influence of medication that was the first thing Murphy noticed when he woke up. The sun was barely peaking through the clouds in the sky, so he knew he had gotten a good amount of hours of sleep behind him.

He remembered everything the moment he tried to twist to get up and pain shot through his right side. “Fuck me sideways.”

Murphy laid back on the bed, his eyes trying to stay open as he looked at the ceiling. He turned his head towards the opposite side, grimacing when it pulled at the stitches on his shoulder a little, to see Mika lying in the same position that he was. Her eyes open and looking at him.

“Sorry for cussing, princess,” Murphy whispered, as he moved his good arm touching Mika’s hand, smiling at her softly as she grasped his hand in hers.

“Is alright,” Mika answered, a sad half smile on her lips that didn’t reach her red eyes. She still had trail of tears in her face, from where she had let everything out until she had fallen asleep.

“Does anything hurt?” As she opened her mouth to answer Murphy beat her to it, “and no lies, princess, please.”

“My arm hurt, but…” Murphy felt his heart constrict as her face started to twist as she tried to fight back her tears.

“It hurts in here, doesn’t it sweetheart?” Murphy murmured as he pulled her into his chest, both being mindful of the other’s injuries. “It hurts deep in your chest and you can’t find how to describe it, and it feels like you can’t breath, can’t even think.”

Murphy looked back up to the ceiling as it started getting blurry, tears starting to run down the side of his face as they fell from the corners of his eyes. “It feels like the sun will never come up again, like you won’t ever feel complete again,” he knew in the back of his head that he might be making things worse, but he just couldn’t stop either. “But it will, princess...” he moved his head to the side, dropping a kiss on Mika’s hair “I can’t promise you much, but I can promise you me and Carol will look after you every step of the way, we’ll never leave you alone, we love you princess, you are so loved.”

Her tiny body shook with sobs as she cried into his chest. They laid there for some time, until both of them had ran out of tears. Slowly, Mika’s breathing started to go back to normal, and Murphy thought she had fallen asleep until she broke the silence.

“Is Carol mad at me?” Mika raised her head from where she had laid it on Murphy’s chest, moving then to sit beside him on the bed. She was picking at the lose threads of her torn up leggings. Murphy put a hand over hers to stop her from making the hole even worse.

“Why would she be?”

“Because I was weak, because I didn’t fight back?”

“But princess,” Murphy said grunting as he moved to sit up properly, pulling Mika so she was sitting on his lap and he could put his arms around her. “You did, you were so brave standing up to Lizzie like that.”

Mika nodded, resting her head against his chest feeling safe in his arms. “I did like you said…” Murphy closed his eyes, sending a prayer up to his brother to help him sail through this, “I fought back, because she was hurting me.”

“And we’re so glad you did, sweetheart, your sister-” Murphy sighed, “she was sick, she didn’t understand the difference between the walkers and us.”

“I know Murph, but it’s okay if I miss her, right?”

“Anything that you feel is okay, princess, anything.”

-.-.-

Mika had fallen asleep in his arms not much later after they had finished their heart to heart. He had laid there beside her, watching over her sleep for a little while. Their little girl had gone through so much already, but she was going to be okay. She was a MacManus now, she was a Dixon… she was theirs.

He had carefully gotten out of bed, not worrying with putting a shirt on as he left the door open in case Mika needed them again. His shoulder hurt a lot, and he could barely move his arm without wanting to hit something for how much it was hurting. His head throbbed mildly, the pain in his shoulder definitely taking all the attention.

He went to get some water, finding Tyreese sleeping with Judith on his chest. He wondered what would have happened if Mika hadn’t fought back… would they have been too late? Would Lizzie had gone after Judith once her sister was down?

The thought alone gave him goosebumps, so he hurried to finish his glass of water, taking a couple of pecans with him and left the house towards the porch. The porch where he knew his woman was going to be standing guard.

“A man might get ideas, of his woman sleeping in another man’s room…” He gave her a cheeky smile, as Carol looked up from where she had been lost in thought looking at the empty garden with the three graves. One freshly made.

“Well, if the woman’s man had not just spent the whole night sleeping then she wouldn’t have needed to spend the night elsewhere.” Carol was sitting on the floor, her back to the wall and one of her legs on the first step. Murphy moved to sit in front of her, leaning back so his back was to her front nuzzling his face to her neck as her arms went around him.

“It’s cold out here Muffin, and you just got out a bad infection.”

“Cold weather helps keep the immune system strong,” Murphy murmured as he closed his eyes, feeling more at ease being in her arms.

They sat there in silence for some time, hearing as Tyreese woke up when Judith started to fuss inside.

“Do you think Mika will be willing to move out today?”

“I think she will be grateful to do so, love.” Murphy sighed, “God knows I will.”

“We’ll go find Daryl today, I have a feeling about Terminus, I think we’ll find him there.”

“You know what, love? I think you’re right.”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it?
> 
> You know the drill peeps, you can drop by at anytime... I love hearing from you guys I'm at [Geektaire](http://geektaire.tumblr.com)


	12. Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you guys believe we're 2 chapters away from the end?
> 
> Because I can't. Thanks to everyone for your continuous support, the fact that some of you have taken the time to leave a comment, a kudos, or even dropped by Tumblr and said hello? It's the reason why I'm still here posting every week. Thank you to those who are lurkers, I know how that is too... I love you too guys. 
> 
> Another un beta one... So all the mistakes are mine. 
> 
> And also another bottle chapter... don't worry... next two ones aren't anymore.

**Chapter XII**

**Alone**

 

They had fucking burned the house down. How did two teenagers fucking burn their only safe place, the only place they had to take cover forcing them to have to look for another place because of course they burned all of their things down with it. 

“Daryl…” Zach said as both him and Beth tried to catch up with him as he walked into the woods. He was fuming, he wanted to punch someone, or something. So he was better keeping his distance with them. 

“I’m sorry, we were just…”

“What?!” Daryl turned, stalking down to Zach not relenting his glare as he saw the boy wince as he approached. “What were you just…” 

Zach looked down, only looking up once Daryl started walking again. He glared at Beth as she tried to hide a smile, knowing quite well why he would never tell Daryl what had happened. Why when he came back from trying to hunt them some food he had found the two of them standing outside the cabin looking helplessly as it caught on fire. 

He would probably never live it down if he did.

“Get that fucking smirk off your face,” Zach grumbled as he trotted to try and keep up with Daryl, looking over his shoulder just to make sure Beth was following them. 

It was going to be a long day.

They finally caught up to him a couple of hours later, the two of them were panting as they stood next to Daryl as he stood unmoving his crossbow raised pointing at something only he seemed to see. 

“Are you ever going to teach us how to shoot that thing?” Beth’s loud voice made Daryl curse as he let the arrow fly too soon and the rabbit he had been trying to get for them to eat scattered to the four winds. 

Zach was really considering maybe just maybe, he was going to come up with some kind of gag to keep Beth quiet one of this days. He was sure Daryl would appreciate if he did. Maybe he might even forgive him for that little lapse in judgment from earlier today. 

“Take it…” Zach frowned at Daryl when he shoved the crossbow at him, “go and teach her something, leave me alone for a while.” 

Zach let the crossbow drop to the ground when Daryl moved past him, watching as his friend moved to sit with his back to a tree a few yards away. His head thrown back to rest on the tree as he seemed to take deep breaths. 

“Come on,” Zach said to Beth, looking sadly  at where Daryl was sitting, his eyes closed pretending to be resting. “We can catch something for him for once.”

Beth looked back to Daryl, taking a step towards the man before Zach cleared his throat, motioning with his head for her to follow him and leave Daryl alone. Daryl was thankful for that. 

He took a deep breath, opening his eyes once he heard them get far enough for his liking. His hands were still shaking, because of everything that he was feeling at the moment. He had wanted to wait for his brothers at the house, he had wanted for them to have a safe place for a couple of days to rest from the constant tension they lived under. 

But it just didn’t seem to be on his stars. He tried to keep his hopes up, but they just seemed to be teared down at every turn he did. Daryl groaned, slamming his fist against the side of his leg wincing when it had what he had inside his pockets poke into his tigh. 

Daryl sighed, raising his hips so he could put his hand inside his pocket and pull out what he had there. Three objects came out, three objects that made his eyes tear up. 

The jasper stone he had picked up what seemed like a lifetime ago, Carol’s necklace with the broken clasp, and a ring that he honestly had no idea what he had thought about when he had pocket it. That was a lie, it was a lie he had told himself to try and push out the thoughts that were really behind it. He perfectly knew why he had kept that ring, he had imagined her wearing it already. 

He had never thought of anyone ever filling the place in his heart, in his soul, that Carol had. He had never thought he would ever get that total soul wrenching life changing love that he had read so much as a kid.  Daryl took the ring on his other hand, putting it on his little finger. He was so tired, he was so tired of fighting, he was so tired of hoping, he was so tired of being alone. 

He had Zach, and Beth, yes. But the only people that had ever made him feel less alone were gone, and with each second that he spent away he just felt the dread grab onto his chest and not letting go. He felt as it grew with every turn he gave without finding them, with every mile between them and the prison. 

There was no other way, he was going to find a safe place for Beth and Zach. He was going to barricade the two of them in there and he was going to go look for his family. Daryl looked at the ring as he made a fist with his hand, as it sparkled in the light. Yes, that was what he was going to do. 

He grunted as he got to his feet, putting his hand inside his pocket and putting his most precious possessions safe inside them. He too a deep breath, jumped a little on his toes shaking to try and get rid of the lingering shakiness he was feeling; before he started tracking the two teens once again. 

Enough with feeling sorry for himself. He had two teenagers to track and try to keep from getting into trouble. Their heavy footsteps making easy for him to follow them. There was something else he would have to work on if he intended them to survive on their own for a little while. 

He heard the grunting of the walker, closely followed by Beth’s cry before he saw them. His first instinct was to run towards the sound, only slowing down once he entered the clearing with the walker already dead by Zach’s hand. 

“What the fuck did you two do?” Daryl muttered as he walked towards where Beth was lying on the ground, her leg at an odd angle, close enough to where the walker was that he could get an idea of what had happened. 

“Nothing.” Zach muttered as he moved to keel at Beth’s side, looking at the animal trap that she had gotten caught on. 

“That was a really noisy nothing,” Daryl grunted as he pushed Zach’s hands away, putting his fingers inside the trap opening long enough to get it off Beth’s foot and throwing it to the side. 

“Can you move it?” 

“Yeah,” Beth said, wincing as she moved her foot up and down. Daryl looked closely, seeing how the trap had broken through the boots she was wearing and fearing what he would find under the boot. 

“We need to take it off, and clean it.” Zach looked from where he was grasping Beth’s hand, looking like the concerned boyfriend when the day before the two of them were bickering like the worst enemies. “We need to find somewhere for you to stay.”

Daryl got back to his feet, grabbing the crossbow from where Zach had thrown it and shouldered it. He watched as Zach pulled Beth up, watching as the two kids put their arms around each other as they started to hobble together. 

“We’re going this way, I think I remember some houses.” The wince on Beth’s face with every step she took made him start planning their closest route. 

This time they were quiet for once, and he wished they hadn’t been. He guided their way, taking them through the easier routes and swallowing his dislike to being touched helping them when it was needed. 

“There’s a house up there,” Daryl said as he saw the trees start to thin out ahead of them. “We saw it from afar, we were going to eventually come back.”

“It’s a cemetery,” Zach stated as he stopped. “You brought us to a cemetery.”

“Watch out from the dead rising from the tombs to eat you.” 

Beth and Zach looked at each other at his deadpan tone, before turning their eyes to Daryl’s back. The corner of Daryl’s mouth had risen in a tentative smile as he made a note to tell Connor of his joke later, his brother would appreciate it. 

“Can we stop for a moment?” Beth asked as Zach started to move forward again. There was a look of pain when Daryl turned back to look at them. The look was a mix of fear and pain, and Daryl couldn’t help but feel bad for the kid. 

“Come on,” Zach said as he moved to stand in front of Beth, bending his knees a little, “get up.”

“What?” 

“Come on, I’m giving you a piggy back ride.” Daryl raised his eyebrows as he watched them, pushing his crossbow further up his shoulder. 

“Are you sure?” Beth asked, looking from Zach’s back to Daryl’s face. 

“You’re going to end up on your ass.” Zach glared at Daryl as he heard his words. 

“Beth, come on!” Daryl tried to hide his smile as he watched the girl try to get on Zach’s back. The first time she almost made it but Zach dropped her legs, making her whine as bad ankle dropped to the ground. The second time was somewhat successful with Zach being able to keep her on his back for two seconds before she slid down his back almost taking him with her. 

The third try had Daryl having to move fast to catch Beth before she fell, while Zach ended up face down on the grass. 

Daryl opened his mouth to say something, only to be interrupted by Zach moving his arm and flipping him off. 

“Come on,” Daryl said chuckling as he put his hand out to help Zach up, “it’s just up to that house, it’s not looking that bad, I’m sure you can walk it off.”

He turned to try and hide his smirk as he got a glare from both kids. It wasn’t his fault that Carol would have probably walked it off like three miles back. She was a warrior, his Carol.

“Come you two, we need to get that ankle cleaned.”

“What if there are people?” Beth asked as she started to limp again, Zach’s arm around her waist keeping her full weight off her ankle. 

“I’ll take care of them.”

“There are still good and nice people out there, Daryl.”

“I’ll take care of them nicely.”

“Stop.” Daryl rolled his eyes before he turned, once again, to look at where the girl was standing by Zach’s side. He felt his throat close up a little bit as he realized what the tombstone she was looking at meant. 

It was her way of saying goodbye to her father, to the man that had become partly their conscience, partly a huge pain in the ass whenever him and Connor butted heads. Daryl watched as Zach pulled Beth closer, trying to console the now crying teenager. 

Daryl spotted some yellow flowers growing between the grass. He pulled some of them out, and put them on top of the headstone. If he had been his brothers, he would have said some shit about God or something like that. But he wasn’t. He was Daryl. 

“He was a good man,” Daryl mumbled, his left hand raising to his mouth. “He’ll be missed.” He grimaced as he bit into his thumb, before turning and starting back towards the house at the end of the road. 

He left them behind to grieve for Hershel as he went ahead to make sure his two charges would be safe. He owed it to the old man. 

He could hear their footsteps as they soon followed, but he decided to give Beth her space and chance to mourn on her own. His priority now was to get those two settled, and to clean that ankle before it caused them even more issues. 

The house was silent, the door opened by just turning the knob. Daryl shook his head, there might seem like a simple lock was necessary in the world they lived now. 

Daryl banged on the side of the door frame after the door slammed open with a bang, his crossbow was up and as he threw a look over his shoulder he nodded at Zach as he watched him have his rifle ready. 

There was no sound coming from anything inside. 

“You two stay here,” Daryl muttered as he felt as the two teenagers entered the house behind him, Beth closing the door behind them. “I’m going to check this out, stay with her.”

“It’s so clean,” Beth’s awe filled voice made Daryl roll his eyes as he continued to move through the house. 

“You think the maid has been dropping by twice a week?” 

Daryl grimaced after the words came out of his mouth, being around his brothers had definitely made him about 40% more vocal with his sarcasm in comparison with before. Just more vocal, because those thoughts had always been there. 

Zach’s snort of laughter did made him feel a little less bad. 

“Someone has been staying here.” Daryl moved to one of the rooms before getting out after seeing it empty with the windows boarded up. “They might still be around.”

“Should we stay?”

“Hell yeah.” 

He felt as both kids followed him into the next room. A room already set up with chairs and an open casket with a dead body of the no walker variety. 

“What the fuck…” Daryl muttered as they all made their way forward. 

“Did it turn?” Zach asked as he raised on his tiptoes to try and see over Daryl’s shoulder, keeping the man between him and the casket. 

“Dunno…”Daryl moved suddenly making Zach lose his footing and slam into the casket, one hand landing on the dead man’s cheek. “You find out.”

He couldn’t help but snicker loudly at the face Zach made as his hand came back with half of the makeup they had used on the body plastered to it. 

“Are you twelve?” Beth said raising her nose at their antics, making Daryl sigh and shake his head as he turned and lead them out of there. There were many rooms still that needed to be cleared before he could get some rest. 

The stairs leading down at the end of the hallway looked interesting. He noticed though that Beth was barely limping as she followed him, with Zach at the rear still trying to clean the makeup from his hand. 

“Looks like it wasn’t as bad after all, huh?” Daryl said as he raised his crossbow as he started going down the stairs. Beth didn’t seem to hear his grouchiness in his voice, and he could hear her babbling behind him as he silently went down the steps. 

The underground level just showed him more of the same, walkers in fancy clothes with half made up faces. 

“This is fucking creepy,” Daryl muttered as he made his way further into the room. “Let’s get that ankle cleaned up.” Without even needing to say anything, Zach started to help him open and close doors looking for anything that could help them with that. 

“I think that’s beautiful…” the men’s eyes met as they turned to look at Beth as she watched over the walkers. “It shows that somebody cares, they wanted this people to get a funeral.”

“Pffft…” Daryl threw a bandage at Zach, picking up his crossbow and making his way towards the stairs again. “Clean it up, I’ll clear everything before you and mortuary Barbie over there come on up.”

Daryl took the steps two at a time as he heard Beth start whining again about his words. He had to remind himself he was doing this for Hershel; he was doing this because it was the right thing and he was fond of Zach. 

He was doing this because he cared. 

He cleared the rest of the home by himself in the time it took for Zach to get Beth’s ankle wrapped. Or at least in the time they pretended it took. Daryl wasn’t stupid, those two had probably done something they shouldn’t have down there. Maybe she was mortuary Barbie after all, to each it’s own he mused. 

At least she was silent as they all entered the last room he needed to clear, the kitchen. The three of them started opening and closing doors, looking for anything they could fine. 

“Booyah” Daryl said smirking as he looked to his charges as he opened the next cabinet over to find rows and rows of junk food stashed away. 

“Oh my God!” 

“There’s peanut butter, jelly, diet coke, pigs feet…” He could feel his stomach growling at the thought of such foods. “There’s a white trash brunch, right there.”

“It sounds delicious to me…” the smile Beth gave him made him feel bad for his earlier comments, although he still believed them. The girl was fuckig weird for all he cared. 

He saw Zach start to reach out for a peanut butter jar, only to stop and look closer. “It’s too clean,” Zach muttered looking at Daryl as if asking for him to confirm.

“Attaboy,” Daryl said as he nodded, “there’s barely any dust. So that means…”

“That whomever owns it checks it very often, this is someone’s stash?”

“Yep.”

“Maybe they’re still alive?”

Daryl nodded again to the boy, the corner of his mouth raising a little in a smile. The boy was learning, and he was damned proud of him for doing so. Not that he was going to tell him, maybe.

“We’re going to just take enough…” Daryl tried to mask his voice not to make him see too dejected. He had thought he could have left them here hauled up while he went out and looked, but with so many signs of life in the house. He couldn’t leave them with a clear conscience. “Leave the rest to the poor soul.”

“I knew it…” Daryl frowned at Beth’s joyus tone.

“You knew what?” He was already unscrewing the lid to a jelly jar. His mouth watering at the mere thought of the sugary substance inside. 

“It’s how I said, there are still good people out there.”

“I’m not out there little girl, I’m right in here.” Daryl said as he put two fingers inside the jelly and used them to bring some into his mouth. “And I’m not good.”

“I think Mama Carol would beg to differ,” Zach added as he reached and grabbed a jar of applesauce before jumping up to sit at the counter. 

“Those pig feet are mine,” Daryl said with his mouth full as he moved to sit at the table, “don’t even think about it boy.”

“As if.”

-.-.-.

He had taken a leave from the kids after they had eaten enough to make him sleepy. There were things to do before he could rest, and while he was good with delegating part of the work to Zach he would feel safer if he was the one making sure they could stay there for at least the night. 

The sun had started it’s descent, the air getting cooler as the warmth given by the star in the sky disappeared. There was a calmness in the air that unsettled him; nothing good came from compliance. 

He checked all the windows for the lower floor, from inside and outside. They were all sealed tight and it would definitely hold. He could barely hear Zach and Beth inside, so noise wouldn’t be an issue either. 

The last thing he had to do was to use some cans and other stuff he had found around, to make a new ‘walker alarm’. The kids never came out to look for him, and he was glad. 

He couldn’t help but let his mind wander as he worked. He couldn’t really remember when had been the last real rest he had gotten, it was probably the night before the run when Murphy had almost gotte killed, because after that everything had just gotten worse and worse until there he was. Alone and away from his family, except Zach. 

He looked over his shoulder as he heard the door open, Zach sticking his head out nodding at him when he saw him. “I finished upstairs, and Beth found some candles so we’re going to light some of them up.”

“Good.”

The boy went back inside and Daryl moved to put his creation to the test. The cans rattled loud enough for his liking. Even though he had finished, Daryl sat in the porch for a while longer. His hair blowing with the wind, making him accept that maybe Carol was right and he did needed a trim. 

His heart hurt when he thought of Carol. Of her and what she must have felt when Rick turned on her. Because that was what it was, Rick had betrayed them all by doing that to Carol. He had betrayed the friendship Daryl thought they had, he had betrayed any trust he had ever put on him. He had left Daryl’s woman out there to die, he had left his Carol alone and probably terrified of never seeing them again. 

He knew she must have been terrified because he was; right there, right now, Daryl Dixon was scared shitless at the mere possibility of never finding any of them again. The idea of continuing on this world without the three of them by his side was just unimaginable. 

The sound of a piano coming in from the house made him snap out of his internal musings. The sun was even lower now, and he grunted as he got on his feet. He hated being the bad guy, but if he could hear the noise, the walkers could do it too. 

The last thing they needed was to do things to call them to them, after all they just seem to find them just fine.

The room was bathed in candle light as he watched over them from the french style doors. Zach was sitting beside Beth on the piano bench as she sang and played, or at least tried to play, along the sheet of music that was on top of it. 

He saw as Zach started moving his arm around Beth’s shoulders, with the girl stopping suddenly and turning to kiss him. 

“Hem-hem,” Daryl cleared his throat as the two teenagers started making out in front of him. Zach jumped away, starting to blush madly as Beth turned to go back to her playing. 

“I would really appreciate it if you two little shits do not burn this one down.” His glare was only seen by Zach since Beth’s back was to him, “and please, tone the noise down, we don’t want to get chased out of here too.”

“Yes, Daryl,” Beth muttered as she glared at him over her shoulder. He didn’t pay attention to her, putting his crossbow on a chair before he made his way to the open coffin on the room. 

“What are you doing?” Zach asked, as Daryl jumped up and first sat but then moved to lie down. 

“Morbid curiosity,” Daryl muttered as he closed his eyes with his arms crossed over his chest. The coffin was actually not that bad, at least compared to other places they had slept on. Daryl shuddered before moving to sit up again. “Way too morbid,” he murmured as Zach turned to look at him again as he moved. 

“There’s a sofa on the office, I’m going to sleep, wake me up if anything happens.”

“Sir, yes sir.” Beth said, saluting as Daryl rolled his eyes giving Zach a look before he grabbed his crossbow and went to get some sleep. 

He really hated teenagers. 

He arrived at the office, putting his crossbow by the couch. The room was too clean, again, serving to just cement his thoughts about the house being someone’s hide out. But that someone wasn’t there right then, that meant it was a safe place… for now. 

There was a throw blanket with little skulls on the back of the couch, he tried not to smile at the irony of there being such an item in a place like this, while he lied down on his side, using the pillow to cover him from head to toe. 

He tried to even out his breathing, trying to count his breaths as a way to get his brain to shut down. He needed to sleep, he needed to be alert so he could watch over them during the night. They seemed to be in a safe place for the time being, but they all knew how fast a safe place could stop being so. 

He closed his eyes, burrowing himself further under the blanket. The next thing he knew there was barely any light in the room, the reds and orange hues of late afternoon shining through the wood boards that had been put outside of the windows. 

The a sharp knock on the half closed door made him jump up, throw the blanket away and grab his weapon. 

“Is just me,” Zach said softly as he pushed the door open the rest of the way, “just wanted to see if you were up, we put some things out so we could eat something.”

“Alright,” Daryl muttered as he bent to grab the blanket, messily folding it before leaving it on top of the couch. He tried not to grimace as he saw the mess he had left in the couch, if she had been there Carol would have had his ass for doing that. 

He would tell her once he finds her. Tell her how big of an effect he had had on him that he was now thinking of how hard a stain wold be to remove when he had never thought that before. 

He followed Zach silently back to the kitchen, where Beth was already sitting in front of a junk food feast. Both her and Zach grinned at him as he sat down, finding two pigs feet jars right in front of his place.  

“Alright,” Daryl said as he rubbed his hands, grabbing one of the jars and opening it. “Let’s eat…” He stopped when he heard his alarm system go off, both Zach first and then Beth looked at him as he stood up putting up a finger for them to stay. 

He grabbed his crossbow, inching his way towards the front door. He peaked in between the boards, sighing and dropping his forehead against one when he saw what was out there. 

“It’s a fucking pup,” he grunted looking over his shoulder to see Zach standing at the kitchen’s door as he opened the door. 

“Hi” Daryl said softly as he crouched down to get closer to the animal “come here boy.” If he was honest, it was the single ugliest dog he had ever seen. He put his hand out for it to sniff, as it looked up at him with his lone eye. Daryl decided in that moment that if the dog decided to let him pet him, he was going to keep it. He wanted that ugly ass dog for himself. 

“Can I see the dog?” The dog’s head raised in fear as he heard Beth’s voice from inside, before turning on his legs and running away. Daryl sighed, dropping his head as he tried to calm down before he returned inside. It wasn’t in his stars to get anything he wanted today it seemed. 

He went back in, closing the door a little too hard while he watched Zach usher Beth back into the kitchen. As much as he liked the boy, he needed to find his brothers and his woman soon, he could feel how he was unravelling more and more with each moment that he spent without them. 

He took another deep breath before he went back into the kitchen, silently sitting in front of his pig feet and taking out one from the jar.

He ignored the faces of the two kids as the vinegar the feet were on ran down his beard and into his shirt. 

“That’s disgusting.” 

“Good,” Daryl said as he bit into eat, chewing the meat he got from it as he did so, “more for me.”

The teenagers looked at each other again, before breaking eye contact and letting silence fall upon them once more. 

Daryl pretended not to noticed the pointed look Zach gave Beth a little while later, after he had gotten up to get the candles from the other room to light the kitchen once it had gone even darker than before. The two of them had been talking to each other, only to stop suddenly when he got back into the kitchen. 

“I need to say,” Beth said softly looking at the half empty peanut butter jar in front of her, “I’m sorry for saying what I said yesterday, I was drunk and I know I should brought up that little girl-”

“Sophia…” Daryl interrupted her before she said anything else, “her name was Sophia.”

“yes, Sophia.” Beth still didn’t look up, her fingers playing with the tag, “I shouldn’t have said that.”

Daryl took a deep breath, trying to calm down the anger he felt again as she mentioned Sophia’s name once more. “You shouldn’t have, you have no idea of what she means to me, to my family.” His eyes seemed to be drilling a hole into Beth’s head, since she wouldn’t raise it to meet them. “I’m sorry too though.”

“Well, now that’s settled….” Zach said breaking the intense silence that followed that. “Does anyone wants to play a game?”

Daryl groaned, before he got on his feet and went to grab another jar of jelly from the stash.

“I’m going to write a thank you note,” Beth said suddenly, getting on her feet to open one of the drawers they had looked into when searching the house and taking a pen and some paper. 

“What for?” Daryl muttered with the spoon between his lips as he took a big spoonful of blackberry jelly.

“Just to say thanks if they do come back, and even if they don’t just want to say thanks.”

“That’s some shit Carol would do,” Daryl said as he chuckled, shaking his head.

“She would, wouldn't she?” Beth asked, a big smile on her face. 

“Mama Carol is the best.”

“She’s gonna kick your ass if she hears you calling her that.”

“She won’t, I’m her favorite.” Daryl smirked as Zach taunted him with those words, Beth meanwhile was writing her note with a big smile on her face. 

“Let me tell you something boy, she might like you, but if it comes to that, she loves me.” Daryl said the words without paying attention to the kids around him, taking another big spoonful of jelly and putting it in his mouth. “What?” he said as he finally looked up to see Zach smiling at him. 

“Nothing.”

The sound of his alarm system going off again together with the dog’s barks made the three of them look towards the door at the same time. 

“I’m going to give that little asshole one more chance,” Daryl grumbled as he stood up, opening another pig's feet jar and taking one. 

“Give it to me,” Zach demanded as he stretched out his hand for Daryl to pass the food, “you look like a grumpy cat, that might have been why he ran.”

“He ran because your girlfriend cant keep her mouth shut,” Daryl muttered as he passed the feet, grabbing his crossbow and following closely behind Zach.

“Watch and learn, Decks.” Daryl didn’t get a chance to tell him not to call him that, before Zach opened the door only to be face to face with a horde of walkers trying to get in.

“Shit!” Daryl ran to his side, the two of them pushing trying to keep the walkers outside. 

“Go, I’ll keep them here, go get Beth and go out through the back!”

“I’m not leaving you!” Zach yelled as he slammed his shoulder again against the door, grunting as pain shot through it and the door did not shut. 

“Go!” Daryl had his back against the door, trying to keep his feet from sliding as the group of walkers pressed forward. “Get ready, go and take Beth with you.”

“Go!” Daryl yelled again as he saw Beth’s terrified face look at the two of them, as the walker’s hands kept trying to grab for Zach. “Run!”

Zach shot off first, grabbing Beth’s hand and dragging her behind him. Daryl pushed away a moment after, turning and shooting the first walker that got in as they scrambled through the now open door. 

“Get your shit, leave through a window!” The walkers were following him, just a few feet behind him, his heart racing a mile a minute.

“I’m not leaving you!” Zach yelled, as they continued to run towards the back of the house. 

“Get to the road, I’ll meet you there!” Daryl heard the sound of a window breaking as he killed one that had gotten too close before he turned sharply towards the stairs. “Follow me you fuckers!” He yelled at the walkers behind him. The only the kids would get was if he got the walkers’ attention, if most of them were going after him the less chance they were going after his chargers. 

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Daryl muttered as he reached the lower level,  quickly reloading his bow and shooting as the first walker appeared on top of the stairs.

He was going to die there, and his brothers were going to kill him afterwards. 

He couldn’t think of anything else as threw his bow towards the entrance. He grabbed one of the metal gurneys turning it as to cover him against the corner, giving him enough space to be able to start killing walkers without them close enough to bite him. 

He killed five walkers in quick succession, before he crawled in between their feet to get out of the corner he had gotten himself into. He pushed the other gurney against the remaining ones, killing one before he ran towards the entrance grabbing his bow before starting on the stairs. 

There were two walkers making their way downstairs, Daryl quickly dispatched of them quickly grabbing one of his arrows from the first walker he had killed before running up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. 

He ran outside, not stopping to grab anything else as he did so. There were walkers around the house, but they were scattered enough that he could get away from them instead of having to fight. The moon shined through the darkness, as he made his way towards the back of the house hurrying his steps to try and get to the kids before even more walkers arrived.

A backpack in the ground was the only thing he found when he arrived to the road. The sound of a car burning rubber made him look up only to see a car with a white cross in the back drive away from him. 

“Zach! Beth!” He yelled as he started running behind the car. “Zach!” He yelled again as he continued to run. He ran trying to follow the tail lights, he ran following them even if they became smaller and smaller as time passed. 

He continued to run even after he stopped seeing them.

He ran even after the night ended and the sun rose. And even then, he continued to run. He was running without a destination in mind, he was running after a ghost. 

All he could hear were Beth’s words over and over again, how he hadn’t looked for Murphy and Carol enough, how he had not cared that he had lost their trail after just finding it. And that gave him strength to continue running. 

He ran until he could not run anymore. 

He was sweating buckets, his hair plastered into his skull as he breathed hard. His chests constricting with a cough once in awhile as he stopped to try and let his heart beat go back to normal. His vision swirled around him just before he felt his knees hit the pavement under him, with him barely able to put his hands in front of him keeping himself from hitting the road face first. 

His breathing was so loud in his ears that he missed completely the fact that he was not alone anymore. 

“Lookit here, what do we got?” The voice startled him, making him react from his insides getting on his feet and hitting the man in the face hard enough to send him to the ground, grabbing his crossbow and pointing it at his face. 

His heart slammed into his ribcage as he heard the men around him, too many for only him, coking their guns ready for him to make a bad move. He tried to steady his breathing, knowing that he could not show any more weakness to the men surrounding him. His life depended on that. 

“Dammit, hold up!” The man in the ground told the men around him, as he covered his now bleeding nose with his hand. 

“I’m claiming the vest.” Someone said from Daryl’s back, making him shudder slightly. 

“My fucking foot is claiming your ass.” Daryl answered back, eyes still on the man in the ground. As the men snickered at his answer he took notice of him, he was older, probably around the age Merle had been or maybe older. And he seemed to be the leader since the others had seemed to followed his commands. 

“Hold up,” the man said as he looked at his hand, laughing when he saw that his nose was bleeding. 

“A bowman…” there was a southern twang that reminded Daryl of the man that had called himself his daddy, and it unnerved him to the core. “I respect that.”

Daryl shifted from one foot to the other, barely keeping himself in check from telling the laughing man off. He had to keep his cool, he couldn’t really pull a Murphy and get himself killed. He needed to think how to get himself out of there. 

“You see, a man with a rifle? He could have been some kind of photographer or soccer coach back in the day, but that…” the man motioned to Daryl’s crossbow with his chin as they kept eye contact, “a bowman’s a bowman, through and through.”

“What do you got there? a 150 pound draw weight?” Daryl didn’t answer. “I'll be donkey-licked if that don't fire at least 300 feet per second.” Daryl glared at the man. “I've been looking for a weapon like that. Of course, I'd want one with a bit more ammo and minus the oblongata stains.”

Daryl did not break eye contact. He knew men like the one in front of him, he had lived with two of them most of his life. He was only afraid because of the number of them, if it was just the two of them he could have taken him.

The men around him laughed. “Get yourself in some trouble, partner?”Daryl gritted his teeth as he heard the same voice from before say from behind him.

“You pull that trigger, these boys are gonna drop you several times over. That what you want?” It was the old man again, and Daryl breathed hard flexing his finger over the trigger lightly. 

That was the opposite of what he wanted. What he wanted was to be back in the prison, what he wanted was to wake up in the middle of his bed with his head on Carol’s breasts and her hands running through his hair. What he wanted was to be annoyed at the fact that he had Connor plastered against his back and he was sweating like a pig. What he wanted was to be mistaken by Murphy yet again. That was what he wanted.

“Come on, fella, suicide is stupid. Why hurt yourself when you can hurt other people?” Daryl knew in that moment that he was going to kill this man, he was going to bide his time until he could make sure he was going to be able to go back to his family; and then he was going to kill him. “Name's Joe.”

Daryl put his crossbow down. “Noah.” The name of his real father felt weird on his tongue, but he was not going to give this man power over him. He was not going to let him have anything from him. 

The men around him put his weapons down. He nodded to Joe.

He had to do whatever he had to, he had to survive.    


 

 

 

 

 


	13. Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more done! 
> 
> Again guys, all mistakes are mine and mine alone.

**Chapter XIII**

**Us**

 

He was running as hard as he could, his chest hurt as well as his knees from where he had fallen as he scrambled away. His heart was beating hard, and he was not getting enough oxygen in his chest. The night had started to give away into the day, and he was still running. 

He didn’t think he could run any longer. 

-.-.-.-

Joe had decided they were going to make camp during the worst of the day, they had all scattered to sleep inside a barbed wire area one of them had found. They had fallen asleep almost immediately, but as dead tired as he felt he couldn’t. 

He wouldn’t allow himself a moment of weakness so this fuckass could finish him off. He had seen their greedy looks at his bag, his bow and his clothes. He was not going to give them that satisfaction. 

He rested his back against a tree, trying to keep his eyes open as the sound of their snoring seemed to lull him into sleep. His knees threatened to give out under him as he stood up, shaking slightly from the effort that it had been running all night and part of the morning. But he needed to move, if not it was going to be worse later. 

And he was going to have a later. 

He silently moved between the barbed wire, looking back at where he had left his bag in his haste to get away. He would not leave then, not yet. He was going to bide his time and then he was going to kill them all. He was sure they were not good people, he was going to make sure they weren’t and then he would take a page out of his brothers’ book. This world had enough evil in it already. 

\--.-.-.-

“We have just enough water for maybe another day, it’s good that it cooled down a little.” Connor heard Rick say something from the front of the group, but he did not paid any mind. His attention was on both Carl and Michonne, as they walked on the rails one foot in front of the other.

Both of them were smiling, and he couldn’t really keep himself from doing the same. 

They had been walking for a full day now, they had left the house in a hurry the day before and started their way to terminus right away. Rick was still being an ass, but at least he was walking and not limping this time around. 

“What are you two doing?” There was a mix of exasperation and fondness on Rick’s voice that made Connor chuckle.

“Winning a bet.” Carl answered, wobbling slightly as he looked up at Rick. 

“In your dreams.” Michonne’s smile was real, and Connor was glad to see that. They had talked a little more the night before, as they kept guard over Carl and Rick. Her soul was hurting, but he knew now that she was going to do everything she could to pull through. 

“I’m still on!” Carl made a hand motion to try and get Michonne of her rail.

“Spoke too soon wise guy…” Connor bit his lip as he jumped to the rail behind Michonne. 

“Do not cheat MacManus!” There was laughter in Michonne’s voice as she scolded him, trying to look over her shoulder at him. 

“I’m not doing anything Feek, I’m just walking here, I’m completely innocent.” He grinned as he hurried his pace, getting closer to Michonne. 

“This might go on awhile, do you mind if we speed this up?” Connor smirked as he saw jealousy in Rick’s eyes as he looked first at Carl, then at Michonne and finally at him.

“Party Pooper,” Connor muttered just for Michonne to hear, in his best Daryl impression. Carl raised his arms in joy as Michonne fell to the side grabbing her sides from laughing too hard. 

“I win!” 

“That was cheating!” Michonne said, her hands on her hips as she looked from Carl to Connor who was grinning. 

“I did not touch you, you fell on your own.” Connor was smiling with his hands up, chuckling once in awhile.

“You distracted me!”

“Pay up.” Carl was smiling as he said the words in a sing song voice, not paying attention at Rick’s disapproving glare. 

Michonne conceded, pulling her backpack from her back and pulling out two chocolate bars.

“Is that really the last kitkat?” Carl asked. Michonne nodded, trying to conceal the red chocolate behind the bigger bar of butterfinger. Carl looked at her face, smirking as she made a sound as he went and grabbed the kitkat anyway. 

“Oh come on!”

“You said the winner got to chose.”

“Alright, you won it… although I still claim it was not fair and square.” The last part was said towards Connor, who only shrugged.

“I’m an angel.”

“He was imitating Daryl.” Carl busted into laughter, making even Rick chuckle at his reaction. 

Connor watched as Carl opened the chocolate bar all the way through, breaking each of the individual bars off. “Come on…” Carl said as he pushed the chocolate bar towards Michonne, “we always share.”

Michonne accepted the bar with a smile, quickly followed by Connor and finally Rick.

They were smiling when they started walking once again. 

.-.-.-.-

“How are you feeling, Muffin?” Carol asked softly as she sat down on the bed next to a still half naked Murphy. She had helped Mika get ready, while Tyreese had taken her outside to say goodbye to her sister for the last time. 

“It’s hurting, but I’ll live.”

“You better,” Carol whispered as she entwined their fingers together, “I can’t marry you if you aren’t.”

“And isn’t that the best motivator ever.” Murphy let go of her hand, sneaking his good arm around her as she started to get up getting her onto his lap. He grunted when pain shot through his neck and arm but he didn’t allow her to get up. “Stay,” he whispered to the side of her neck, before he pulled her closer and dropped a kiss there. 

“How are you doing, love?” The silence inside the house was a treat, as Tyreese took care of the girls giving them a chance to finish getting ready for their departure. “Really, no lies.”

“I can’t…” Murphy just hugged her closer as he heard her voice break, “I can’t let myself feel it right now, Murph, If I do…”

“You’ll never get off this bed.” Carol moved so she was sitting sideways so she could look at him as he finished her thought. “I know what you mean, love…” Carol’s hand had moved to touch his cheek softly, smiling sadly at him as he turned his face and kissed her palm. “We’re hanging by a thread here.”

“Yes baby,” Carol sighed as she dropped her head on his shoulder. Murphy dropped a kiss to the top of her head, closing his eyes as he let the calmness surround them for a moment. 

“I miss him.” Murphy smiled sadly against the top of her head as he heard her words. He knew who she meant by  _ him. _ Connor. “And it’s stupid because we haven’t found Daryl yet, but I’m feeling like I will never be complete again even if we do.”

Murphy felt his throat start to close up, the imminent burning of tears in his eyes. But he needed to stay calm, this time it was his turn to be there for Carol. She loved him too. She loved his brother as much as she loves him. 

“When I saw him the last time,” Carol stopped to hiccup, “all I could think about was what if I never got to see him again, the last time I did had been through a glass…” She dropped Murphy’s hand to bring both of hers to her mouth, “I didn’t get to kiss him goodbye.”

He just hugged her to him, whispering sweet nothings to her ear as her cries started to get more quiet as the minutes passed. They would never be complete again, and they needed to be able to live with that. As much as it would always hurt. 

-.-.-.

He walked far enough from the camp that he had stopped being able to hear their snores. He let the calmness of the woods fill him, he let the smell fill his lungs; he let his mind go blank as he focused on the little things that surrounded him. 

The sound of leaves moving with the wind, the sound of the bugs he had learnt to identify when he was young, the sound of critters trying to make a run for it. 

He knew that if he had tried to make a run for it, those men, Joe and his crew? They would probably try to find him and kill him. In Joe’s eyes he saw a reflection of the man that he had once called ‘Daddy’. There was the same coldness in Joe’s eyes, that he had seen in Will Dixon’s; and that had been the main reason why he had decided to stay. 

He had nothing to go on, he had ran so much behind the car that had taken Zach and Beth, that he had no real idea of where he was. He needed to find some kind of marker, something that could help him get an idea of where he was, and how far had he stranded from his original path. 

He had ran most of the night, so that would have been around eight hours of running. That would probably put him around 40 miles away from where he had started. Daryl raised his crossbow when he saw a small rabbit appear from between the bushes. It was tiny, with barely any meat in his bones. But for him, it would be enough. 

He took a deep breath as he tried to stop his hands from trembling. It was barely visible, but for someone with the accuracy that he usually had. Those small movements could be the difference between getting breakfast and not. 

He heard the noise of an arrow by his ear, closer than he would have ever allowed, at the same moment that he let his bolt fly. The rabbit never stood a chance. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” Daryl was up and on the other man's face as soon as he was able to. The fact that the man had sneaked up on him didn’t settle well with him. He could have been shot in the back, and there would have been his chance of getting back to his family. He had to get his shit together. 

“Catch me some breakfast.”

Daryl sneered at the man before he turned and started making his way to where their prey laid in the ground, two arrows sticking out of the small body. “That’s mine.”

“My arrow is the one that hit first.”

“Your fucking mama was the one that came first.” Daryl muttered to himself as he pushed his crossbow to his back. 

“The cotton tail belongs to me.” Daryl took a deep breath, the need to punch this guy on the face and wipe the smile from his face strong enough that made him consider the possibility of actually doing that. 

“I’ve been here while you asses were snoring up a storm.” He knelt on the ground and took out his bolt from the rabbit, cleaning it on his pant leg before taking out the arrow. 

“The rules of the hunt? They are worth jackshit out here.” Daryl got to his feet, the rabbit and his bolt in one hand, and the arrow on the other; as he turned to look at the man that he hadn’t even thought of getting a name for. “And that rabbit has been claimed. Boy”

Daryl glared as he threw the man’s arrow away from them into the woods. The hair on the nape of his neck seemed to stand as he heard the word that Merle and Merle’s Daddy had used to call him for most of his life. He hadn’t been ‘Daryl’ to Will Dixon, he had never been worth a name to him. He had been boy, asshole, kid, and his personal favorite ‘bastard’. He had not been ‘boy’ for at least a year and a half now, that man, that  _ boy _ , had died the moment he had been told he was worth something. 

He was not going to let it come back again. 

“That rabbit, is mine weather you like it or not.” Daryl stood in front of the man, their eyes on each other and he knew. He knew that this wasn’t about the critter, this was about a guy’s ego feeling threatened. The man across him was so scared of him, that he was trying to intimidate him somehow. 

Daryl knew what game this was, he had lived this game with Merle for many years. He knew exactly what to do to win at this game. 

“So If I was you I would hand it over…” Daryl started walking towards the ragged looking man, Daryl knew he was intimidating when he wanted to be; and he could see it in the man’s posture as he started talking louder as he approached, “because if you don’t, you’re going to wish you didn’t even get out of bed this morning.”

“It ain’t yours.”

“You know…” Daryl had stopped beside the guy, still glaring at him, “it was bitch that left you all messed up.”

Daryl chuckled, shaking his head as he smirked and roll his eyes; noticing how the man just seemed to get even more upset after not getting the reaction he wanted from him. “She left you walking around here like a dead man.”

“You wouldn’t even know what a pussy is if you had it in front of your face.” Daryl smirked, as he walked around the man his free hand on his knife in case the man started something. “You seem more of the cock sucking kind.”

Daryl had stopped after throwing that comment over his back, he knew this type of men after all. There were not just a bunch of pussies, but they were homophobic pussies at that. He was gripping the knife, hearing as the leaves rustled as the man behind him took a few steps towards him. He took the knife out of the scabbard, and turned to slam it into him. 

When he was stopped by Joe.

“Easy fellows,” Joe said as he quickly got in between the two men, a hand on Daryl’s wrist and the one on the chest of the heaving mad man. “Let’s put the weapons down and let’s try to figure out what’s really the problem here.”

Daryl just smirked, making a spectacle of him putting the knife back in his scabbard. The man on Joe’s other side glared at him harder, and Daryl couldn’t help but think of his brothers. He winked at him as Joe turned away, seeing as he just seemed to get even more mad.  

“Did you claimed it?” Joe asked the other man. 

“Hell yeah, I did.”

“Well, there it goes, that critter belongs to Len.” Joe was looking at him, as if expecting him to just comply. 

“So let’s have it,” Len said as he put his hands on his hips, frowning even more as Daryl raised his eyebrows at his posture. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Daryl asked Joe, as the older man just looked from one man to the other. 

“Looks like you might be wanting an explanation.” Daryl gave Joe a look. “You want an explanation.”

“See, going out there alone, it ain’t an option nowadays…” Daryl chose to avoid eye contact with Joe at that. He knew that, hadn’t he said that to Merle once… you need people, but this was definitely not the type of people you need. “Still it is survival of the fittest,” Daryl kicked a small rock away from them, clutching the rabbit harder in his hand. “That’s a paradox right there.”

The man was speaking to him like he was stupid, and he was everything but. Daryl raised his eyes to look at Joe, and felt a shiver down his back as he saw once again the same look he used to see on the Dixon men. The look of an alpha male, at least that’s what Merle had loved to call himself. The eyes of someone that cared about nothing but themselves. 

“So I laid down some rules on the road to keep everything from going south every couple of hours. Keep our merry band together and stress free.” Daryl was feeling the feeling he knew was anxiety tight in his chest. Stress free was something he definitely wasn’t. “All you have to do is claim.”

“That’s how you mark your territory, your prey, your bed at night. One word ‘claim’.”

“Why not better piss over every fucking thing?” Joe laughed, and Daryl cringed inside. “I ain’t claiming nothing.” He added, watching as Joe took notice of his defiance. 

“We’re going to teach him, right?” Len said as he snarled at Daryl, taking a step closer to him. 

“Want to see you try, princess.” 

“The rule says we gotta teach him,” Len sneered to Joe, as Joe looked at Daryl with intrigue. Daryl wasn’t sure that was a good thing, or not. 

“That wouldn’t be fair to punish you for breaking a rule you didn’t even know it existed.” Len  huffed as he walked a few feet away, running a hand through his hair as he listened to Joe’s words.  Daryl wanted to wipe the floor with him, but satisfied himself with only glaring at him.

“There are no rules no more.” Daryl was still glaring at Len, considering him the bigger danger out of the two of them. Len was unpredictable, while Joe was so much like his former Daddy than just looking at him made him want to crawl under a rock and stay there.  

“Oh, there are still are. You know that, that’s why I didn’t kill you for the crossbow.” Daryl felt as Joe moved closer to him, tensing immediately as he did so. “Easy there, partner.” Joe said as he moved behind Daryl, taking the free end of rabbit as him and Len continued to glare at each other. 

Daryl tried not to react, he knew any reaction from him could be taken as a sign of weakness. And he was not weak, he was never weak when compared with people like them. Daryl finally looked at Joe, frowning as the older man didn’t let go of the now suspended in the middle of the air rabbit. 

Without saying anything, Joe brought his axe down and cut the rabbit in half. Throwing the half in his hand right into Len’s chest. Len sneered at Daryl, before stalking away from them both and back towards the camp. 

“Claim, that’s all you gotta say.” Daryl watched Len go, before he looked from the side of his eyes at Joe. He could take him, but that would leave the other men to go after him. Yet, Joe was the bossman, and without him the other jackasses would be a lot easier to pick one by one. “The ass end, is still an end.” 

Daryl glared at the back of Joe’s head as the older man gave him his back as he walked away from him. The man had such a big of an ego that he didn’t worry about giving Daryl his back. 

Daryl sighed as he started to make his own way back to camp. He needed the substanance he would get from the half rabbit, he needed to keep his strength up; there were many things to get through before this ended.

.-.-.-

It had been almost midday by the time they were ready to leave the house behind. Tyreese and the girls were walking in front of them, Mika’s little hand swallowed inside Tyreese’s. 

They had originally tried to leave a lot earlier, but even if Murphy had tried to pass it off as normal, he had gotten dizzy more than once while on his feet. And Carol would not let him out on the road until he had eaten something, and slept some more. 

After all in less than a week he had gotten over the flu, he had been almost blasted off because of a tank, he had been almost run over by his future wife; and he had been shot… twice. 

But still, he couldn’t help but smile down at Carol as she put an arm around his waist as he  stumbled slightly as they continued their way down the tracks.  The whole situation worried him if he was being honest, both him and Mika were not doing so well, Tyreese was still unsure of even killing walkers and Judith; well Judith couldn’t do anything to protect them. 

The whole responsibility was falling upon Carol’s shoulders, and he did not like that at all. Not even a little bit. His woman was well capable of keeping them all safe, but he knew how much that would weigh upon her shoulders. 

How what she had needed to do to save his life, weighed on her shoulders. She had killed a child for him, someone she loved because she had threatened them; because she was going to kill him. There was no doubt in his mind, even if she had missed that first shot; Lizzie was going to kill someone, it might have been her sister, him or even Carol. The poor soul had been conflicted and he sent a prayer out for God to give her soul rest. This was no world for someone like her. 

“You feeling dizzy?” Carol’s voice brought him out of his own mind, looking down to her blue eyes as he shook his head softly. His shoulder and his head were both throbbing, and it was a drag to have one arm pinned to the side. But at least the dizziness had disappeared momentarily. “Are you sure you don’t need to rest?”

“Love,” Murphy said stopping and in turn making her stop, “I’m good, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’ll always worry about you, Murphy.” Carol raised a hand to put it against his cheek, caressing it. “Always.”

Judith’s cries made break apart, with Murphy stealing a quick kiss before they walked up to where Tyreese was standing bouncing a pissed off Judith to try and calm her down. 

“I think she’s tired of being carried…” Tyreese motioned with his head to where Mika was leaning against a boulder at the side of the road. “I think we all need a break.”

Carol nodded, giving Murphy a look when he shook his head as Tyreese looked at him. It was true,  they needed to stop, Murphy might be up to continue based on his stubbornness alone; but Judith and Mika weren’t.  

Tyreese sat himself next to Mika, backs against the boulder, taking the blanket Carol immediately passed him from her pack and extending it before him. Judith stopped crying the moment he put her on her back, clearly happy with being left alone for a moment. 

“I guess that’s settled,” Murphy muttered as he put the messenger back he was carrying, the only thing Carol had let him carry, from his shoulder letting it drop by Mika before he sat himself on top of the rock. “We’re staying here for a little while.”

“Good, it’ll give me a chance to get us something to eat.”

“Wait, where you think you’re going?” Murphy said, getting on his feet quickly once he saw Carol start checking how much ammo she had left in her gun, leaving her rifle with Tyreese. 

“Someone has to do the catching for us to be able to eat.”

“We have pecans,” Mika’s little voice made Murphy smile softly at her before fixing his eyes back on Carol. She was barely able to look at Mika, her eyes on the ground as she put the gun in the back of her pants. The same gun Lizzie had used on him. 

“I know sweetheart, but if you are going to heal you need more than pecans.” Carol finally raised her face, giving Mika a smile that the girl and Tyreese seemed to buy for real. But Murphy knew her, he knew her better than the two of them. 

“I’m going with you.”

“You need to rest, Murphy.” The use of his full name, together with the fake smile from before gave him a hint of what was really happening behind all that. She was keeping everything bottled up, just like she had said, she couldn't let herself feel it. 

She was trying to push everything away, and that seemed to include him somehow. 

“I’m good to go, I can be your spotter.”

“You can barely stand without swaying, Murphy…” her voice was tired, and it hurt him to hear it coming from her. “I’ll be fine on my own.”

“That’s the thing, love,” Murphy whispered as he took the couple of steps that were keeping the apart, putting a hand on her cheek, “you don’t have to.” He moved, to grab her hand with his good hand, turning to look at Tyreese over his shoulder. “We’ll be back in half an hour tops, you got this.” 

Tyreese nodded, even if there hadn’t been an actual question to Murphy’s words. Murphy did not let go of Carol’s hand, the two of them walking hand in hand deeper and deeper into the woods. Murphy didn’t even pretend to be looking for game, the only moment he was not looking at Carol was when he was trying to keep himself from falling down face first. 

“Are you ready to talk to me, love?”

“What is there to talk about?” Carol said, sighing as they finally stopped at a clearing. She pulled back from him, dropping his hand and putting her arms around herself. 

“You’re pulling away, love.” Murphy whispered as he moved to lay his back against a tree, wincing when his shoulder throbbed at the movement. “Maybe not as much from me as you are pulling from Mika, but you still are.”

“I can’t…”

“You had to do it.” Carol’s face shot up from where she was looking at the forest ground to meet his eyes, panic and fear in them. “You had to pull that trigger, she would have killed me, she would have killed Mika.”

“No,” Carol whispered as she seemed to try and hug herself even harder, her eyes leaving Murphy’s as her face started to crumple. “I didn’t.”

“She shot me, love, she shot me twice.”

“I should have done something sooner.”

“What could you have done?” Murphy pushed away from the tree, walking slowly towards her. He was itching to bring her closer to him, to take her into his arms. But as she said before, she was not letting herself feel it. And she needed to let herself feel it. 

“I knew there was something wrong with her, I always knew….”

“And so did I, so did Conor,” Murphy had to stop to take a breath after saying his brother’s name, “but we didn’t do anything either, that’s on us as much as it’s on you.”

“You didn’t kill her.” Carol whispered the words as Murphy stood right in front of her, looking up at him as her blue eyes shimmered with tears. “You didn’t kill Mika’s only living family, that was me, how can you even stand to look at me?”

“I stand to look at you, because you saved my life.” Murphy raised his good hand slowly, putting it on her shoulder feeling as she shivered underneath it. “I stand to look at you because I love you, because you did what you had to do to keep us, me, alive.” He took the small step that was still between them, bringing them flush against each other. “I stand to look at you because I know you, I know that what happened, with Karen and with lizzie? It’s breaking your heart, and I couldn’t love you more if I wanted to.”

Her only answer was a sob that tore through her chest, and Murphy could only pull her into his chest letting her cry out her pain, cry out the anguish that she as a mother could only experience after what she had to do. He could do nothing but hold her close, and whisper to her how much he loved her. 

Her sobs had started to quiet down when they heard them. The groaning and moaning from walkers approaching, followed quickly by the barks of a dog. Carol pushed Murphy behind her, as she used the back of her hand to wipe her cheeks, her gun in one hand and her knife in the other. 

They were ready for company. 

.-.-.-.-

He had put the rabbit inside an old garbage bag he found on the side of the tracks. The backpack had what little he had and he was not going to fill it with blood from the chopped up rabbit’s ass he was carrying. 

That as well as he was not going to open with bag for those assholes to see what he had with himself. They had gotten back to their feet as soon as he had gotten bag, following one of the assholes as he seemed to try an d track somethin g or someone. 

“So what’s the plan, Noah?” Daryl had to remind himself that he had given Joe his father’s name instead of his, knowing that his survival depended on him not forgetting that little tidbit. 

“How so?” He didn’t clear his throat when it came raspy as Murphy called ‘his batman voice’. 

“You’re with us now, but you ain’t soon?” Daryl looked at Joe from the side of his eye, watching as the older man took a drag from his cigarette.

“Yep.”

“So what’s the plan?”

“I’m looking for my brother, we got separated in all this,” Daryl said warily looking at the men in front of them. “Tough son of a bitch.” He could have been talking of any of his brothers using those words.

“Older or younger?” Joe asked as he took another smoke. 

“Older.”

“You think he would be up to joining us if you find him?” Daryl shrugged, his mind wandering a little. Merle would have been up for it, hell, Merle would have fit right in becoming Joe’s right hand man in no time. 

Connor and Murphy would kill them all with no second thoughts. 

“We ain’t good enough for you?”

“Some of you ain’t exactly friendly,” Daryl muttered as he glared at Len walking a few yards in front of him. 

“You ain’t so friendly yourself.” Joe had a smirk on his face, and Daryl clenched his fist around his bag as he felt the need to wipe it off his face. He was plenty friendly. He had like four good friends, he was friendly. 

Daryl just grunted as an answer. 

“What you need out there is a group, you and your brother won’t make it on your own.”

Joe’s words reminded of what he had told Merle once, how in this world they needed people. The thing that Joe was unaware of, was that he  **_had_ ** people. People he trusted, he just needed to find them. “Maybe I don’t.” He didn’t because he didn’t want a group, he wanted  _ his  _ family. 

“No, but you do,” Joe said as smoke escaped from his nose, “you should be with us.”

“I got my brother.”

“You don’t need to be friendly,” Joe said pretending he hadn’t heard Daryl mutter anything. The two of them watched as the rest of the guy approached a walker that was coming towards them. “We don’t have to be nice.” Daryl’s mind immediately went to Carol’s smile as she played with Judith, Hershel’s chuckle as he cured the scraps they had gotten at a run. “We don’t have to be brothers at arms.”

They definitely weren’t brothers in arms. Daryl had brothers in arms, Michonne, Glenn, Maggie, Andrea what this men had here? It was nothing like what they had back then. 

They continued to walk as they watched as three of the men took on the walker between them. “You just gotta follow the rules.”

Joe passed him the cigarette. “You claim…” Joe opened his arms as he talked, “if you still, you kill.” Daryl got rid of the excess of ashes. “I know it sounds funny but no one finds it funny when things start disappearing.” 

“And you don’t lie, cause that’s a slippery slope when it starts happening.”

“What happens if you break them?” Daryl said, keeping eye contact with Joe as he turned to look at him. 

“You catch a beat.” Daryl had to stop the shudder that seemed to born at the base of his back at the easy way Joe spoke about it. “The severity depends on the crime committed and on the general attitude of the day.” Daryl knew what that meant, Daryl had lived those words. The beatings are according to the severity of the crime; they were always worse. Because this men? This men were just like the devils he carried on his back. 

“But that don’t happen much, because when men like us…” Daryl felt bile rise on the back of his throat at the idea of being one of those men, “follow the rules and cooperate a little bit, the world is ours.”

“My brother is going to love you.” Daryl couldn’t help muttering under his breath, hoping based on Joe’s laughter that he didn’t catch the severe sarcasm he had said them with. 

Joe slow down to a stop, bringing his fingers to his mouth, whistling to get the guys attention. “Slow down now, that’s our boat for the evening.” 

Daryl frowned as he looked at the graffitied warehouse. It did seemed like a good position to defend, but it was just creepy. A creepy place for the creepy guys. 

“You coming?” Joe asked Daryl as he stood still on the train tracks as the guys started to walk towards the closed doors. 

Daryl looked at Joe, not sure of what he was going to do. The look on Joe’s eyes made the decision for him. He nodded, walking to catch up with the older man, passing him the half used cigarette back. 

“Good boy,” Joe said chuckling as he patted Daryl’s shoulder. 

Daryl was going to kill him.

-.-.-.-

“She will take good care of him, you don’t have to worry,” Connor said to Rick a small smile on his face as he pushed another branch away so they could move through. 

“I know,” Rick grumbled as he followed the oldest of the MacManus as they moved further inside the woods to try and put some traps to catch something to eat.

“He’s a good kid,” Connor said a few minutes later when the silence between the two of them got too much for him. 

“I know.”

“He’s just a teenager, he’s pissed at everything, don’t take it seriously.”

“I don’t.” 

Connor just scoffed, continuing silently following what he thought were a rabbit's tracks. He wasn’t used to silence. He had never been. Murphy had always been there trying to talk his ear off, and being in the company of someone else and not talking, that was just fucking weird in his books. 

“You don’t like me,” Connor muttered as he crouched down to look closer at the tracks. “And I don’t care about that, I’m just trying to find my family just as you are.”

Connor stood back up, taking the piece of rope he had in his pocket and started silently making the snare just like Daryl had showed him more than once. 

“I owe you,”  Rick said softly as he stood guard above him, “you saved Carl more than once, and you didn’t have to.”

“Are you fucking with me?” Connor raised his voice as he turned and walked closer to the younger man, “I didn’t have to? Are you hearing yourself.”

He could see that Rick was getting mad, his chest starting to heave as he dropped his eyes down to the ground. “He’s not your responsibility, he’s mine.”

“I fucking love the kid, he’s part of my family, and if there’s something I do, is protect my family at all costs.” Connor scoffed, slamming Rick’s shoulder with his on purpose as he started making his way back to where he had left Michonne and Carl. They, Michonne and Carl, were family in his heart and no one would ever make him think otherwise. 

-.-.-.-

Daryl let them all go in first, not trusting his back to any of those assholes. He watched as they went in, weapons up not knowing what they were going to find. His fingers twitched on his crossbow, feeling the slight pump of adrenaline trying to take over. 

He went in after Joe, sneering at Len as the man dared to look at him.  He closed the door behind him. The place was an old garage, and he could feel the need to start looking around, trying to see if maybe under one of those tarps there was a bike hidden. He would miss Merle’s bike, one of the last things he still had from his brother. 

He made his way to one of the cars, as the rest of the group started to scatter around. “They ain’t here…” the man with the bandana said loudly, Daryl frowned wondering who he meant by ‘they’. “No on has been here for a while.”

Daryl stopped paying attention as Joe and the guy talked, trying to recognize what exactly was the car he had uncovered. 

“Claimed.” One of the guys said as he approached him, kicking the bag Daryl had dropped away. Daryl rolled his eyes, moving to grab his bag not saying anything. 

He was seeing red, but he was not going to give in. He was not going to claim a thing, and he was going to eventually kill these asshole. He saw from the corner of his eye as Len, the motherfucker, saw him start walking towards the bed of the truck. Len threw his things on it, looking at him with a smile as he said “claimed.”

Daryl moved to the middle of the circle of cars, dropping his bag, his messenger bag and his crossbow before he laid down on the cold hard concrete. He sighed as he took his messenger bag and used it as a pillow, throwing an arm across his eyes. 

His head was pounding, and even with the danger that were those men. Tiredness won him over and he fell asleep within minutes. 

-.-.-

Carol slammed the knife into the skull of the first walker she reached without alerting the others. She had tried to force Murphy to stay behind, where it was safe, but he had not listened to reason. There weren’t that many walkers, they were trying to get to a dog that they couldn't seem to see yet that had gotten himself trapped between a boulder and a big trunk. 

Murphy watched from a few feet back, his gun out in case Carol needed help. So far the other five walkers were too busy paying attention to the barking dog, to notice the silent movement of the deadly huntress that was his wife to be. 

Murphy whooped loudly as Carol grabbed the last walker by the shoulder, before slamming the knife right into the back of his skull, using his own momentum to bring it away from the entrance to the place where the dog was stuck inside. 

“Murphy, shut up.” Carol scolded him, although there was no real anger behind her words. She knew how Murphy was, and she knew he was just trying to get her to smile after everything that they had been going through. 

She actually laughed when the dog suddenly shot out of his hiding place to throw himself at Murphy, jumping on his hind legs as his tail wagged as he seemed to be trying to get Murphy to hug him or at least pet him. 

“What the fuck? you are the ugliest mutt I have ever seen.” 

Carol’s laughter died when something suddenly and silently grabbed her leg. She immediately reacted, bringing down her arm to slam her knife against the walker. 

“No! Carol!”

She stopped as her knife was about to land on the blood matted skull of Zach her brain finally processing Murphy’s warning, Zach who was looking at her like he had never seen anything more beautiful before. 

“Zach?” Carol said softly, feeling as the knife slipped through her fingers as she dropped herself to her knees in front of the injured boy. “Oh my God, Zach!” She was sure there were tears running down her cheeks, but the boy in front of her looked worse for wear, he had blood matted on the side of his head, and looked kind of green. 

But he was alive, they had managed to find him alive. 

“Daryl,” Zach said softly, wincing as he tried to keep his weight off Carol as she helped him get out of the hole he had gotten himself and the one eyed dog inside of, “I was with Daryl until last night, I don’t know what happened, but I’m sorry Mama, but I lost him.”

Carol wiped the tears running down Zach’s cheeks softly, before pulling the smelling teenager into her arms. Zach broke down, clutching the back of her jacket in his hands as sobs overtook him. 

They had found the first missing piece, Murphy felt his chest get a little lighter. Daryl had been alright up until the night before, his brother was fine, he knew it.

Murphy tried to hide the tears that shined in his eyes as Zach continued to cling to Carol. He hoped Daryl was fine, because as much as he had always said he would know if something happened to his brothers; other than complete devastation he hadn’t felt anything different after Connor’s death. 

Murphy looked up at the sky, asking God and Connor to look after Daryl. They wouldn’t survive if they lost him too. 

.-.-.- 

If it had been up to him, he would have continued on their way for a few more hours. He had taken a nap, a good couple of hours, before going outside to take a piss while the other men did their things inside of the shop. 

There hadn’t been anything good around the place other than some old cinnamon sticks that he had immediately put in his mouth, so he had ended up getting out of the sun and back to his made  up bed in the middle of everything. 

“You have to be kidding me…” Daryl didn’t look away from where he was looking at the ceiling, counting the cracks to pass the time. He moved when he felt, more than see, the movement of someone coming closer to him, sitting up and taking out the stick from his mouth. 

“Give it here.” Len said menacing, as he looked down at Daryl. He was at least smart enough to stay a few feet away.  

“Step back.” Daryl growled, looking at where Len was standing before looking up at the man again. 

“My half was in the bag, now it’s gone.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Daryl said as he got to his feet, “are you still talking about that fucking rabbit?”

“There isn’t anyone around here, that’s interested in half a cottontail, except you.”

“Fuck and you in your cottontail.”

Daryl heard the snickers of the men behind Len at his words. His eyes never moved from the other archer, calculating how long it would take him to pull out his knife and end this once and for all. 

“Empty your bag.” Len made a motion to try and grab Daryl’s thing, making him growl as he used his foot to push them behind him. 

“I want to see you try.”

“Noah,” Joe said as he walked up to stand between the two men, “give me that bag.”

Daryl sneered at Len, not taking his eyes off him as he took the plastic bag and passed it to Len.

“Check the other one too.”

“The fuck you will.” Daryl sneered at Len, kicking his messenger bag further back. 

“Did you take his rabbit, Noah?” Joe asked as he started to undo the knot on top of the plastic bag. 

“Fuck no, I don’t need this pussy’s fucking rabbit.”

“What do we got here,” Joe said as he took a couple of more steps getting himself in between the two glaring men. “Come on.”

Daryl frowned when Joe turned the bag, a few of the things he had scavenged on the way there falling out before the top half of that morning’s rabbit did as well. He looked up at Len, finding the man looking triumphantly at him. 

Daryl’s hand start to move towards his knife. He could probably at least take Len and Joe with him if it came to that. “You put that in there, didn’t you,” Daryl said as he took a step closer to Len, “when I went out to take a piss?”

“You lie.”

“Didn’t you!” Daryl yelled, pushing at Len’s chest as the man pushed forward. 

“You lied, you stole.” Daryl was still sneering at Len, waiting for him to jab him with his finger one more time before he broke it. “We’re going to teach this fool or what, Joe?”

Len took another step towards him, and Daryl moved his arm back ready to strike. “Whoa, whoa…” Joe quickly got in between them, as the rest of the group started to crowd around them. “Noah here…” Daryl was looking from one man to the other, for a few seconds forgetting that he was Noah, “says that he didn’t take your half of the rabbit, so we seem to have a conundrum.”

“Use little words, because shit for brains here has no idea what the fuck that is.”

Joe gave Daryl a look as he turned to look at him, “so either he’s lying which is an actionable offense...” Joe looked at Daryl, with those eyes that reminded him so much of a past life before he turned to Len, chuckling. “Or… you didn’t plant it on him, like some kind of pussy punkass cheating coward cop, did you?”

Daryl saw the moment Len realized he had bitten more than he could chew. His body language didn’t change, but Daryl saw the moment he realized he had majorly fucked up. “Because while that wouldn’t be specifically breaking the rules, I would be disappointed.”

Len looked at Joe eye to eye. “It would.” Daryl could see how the pulse on his neck seemed to have accelerated, and in turn he felt his start to calm down. He was going to get out of there. His hand never left the hilt of his knife though. “I didn’t.”

“Good,” Joe said as he patted Len on the arm before turning fully to Daryl. Daryl took a sharp breath as Joe turned and smacked Len strong enough to send him crashing to the floor. “Teach him a lesson, gents. I’m sick of this lying sack of shit. Teach him all the way.”

Daryl watched as the men started to crow around the fallen Len, starting to kick him while he just laid there on the ground. “Saw him putting it in,” Joe murmured getting himself in the middle of his line of sight. 

“Why didn’t you try to stop him.”

“He knew the rules, he decided to act like that.” Daryl’s hatred for the man in front of him grew even more as he dared to smile at him, as if he wasn’t ready to kill him at his earliest convenience. “You told the truth, he lied. You understand the rules, he doesn’t.”

Daryl looked as the men continued to beat on Len, knowing that as much as the man deserved it, as much as he also wanted to stop them. He couldn’t. 

“Looks like you got the head too.” Daryl was barely able to react, catching the top half of the cottontail as Joe threw it to him. He sighed as he sat himself down again, trying to block out the sounds of the man dying behind him as the beating continued. 

.-.-.-

They had been way over the half an hour Murphy had told Tyreese they would take when they got back. Zach had needed to clean up, covered in blood both his and from the walkers. Murphy had thrown the door behind him into the stream as Carol took watch, chuckling as the mutt had actually seemed to like that. 

Zach had told them what had happened once he had calmed down. How he had left Beth far enough that was safe before he had gone back to look for Daryl. How he had been followed by more walkers that he had been able to contain once he ran out of ammo, and how he had just ran. 

He had asked both him and Carol for their forgiveness, for he had left Daryl behind. All he had gotten as an answer was another hug from Carol and Murphy’s arm around his shoulder. 

He was among family again. 

Mika and Judith had seemed enthralled by the dog, as ugly as it was, and the dog in turn seemed to have taken to Murphy. 

“Daryl tried to get him inside of where we were staying,” Zach said as Murphy pushed the dog away once again as he tried to lay across his lap. “Beth kind of scared him  away .”

“He’s a good boy? Aren’t you?” Carol couldn’t help but chuckle as Murphy baby talked to the door, the sound of the dog’s tail hitting the ground beside him making all of the smile. 

“Did you see my sister?” Tyreese asked after the sounds of the woods filled the silence between them. Judith was asleep on his arms, as Mika used one of his thighs as a pillow.

“Sorry, man.” Zach said a sad smile on his face. “We only saw some of the people from woodbury on our way out.”

“Got to keep your faith, Ty,” Carol said softly, smiling as she ran a hand softly over Zach’s head as the boy rested it against her shoulder, “we’ll find her.”

Ty gave her a sad smile, chuckling as he motioned with his head to her as Zach’s eyes started to drop. 

“Sleep,” Carol said softly against Zach’s temple before she pushed him softly so he would lie down. The boy, because in Carol’s mind at that moment he looked so young, moved until he was mirroring Mika, with his head on Carol’s lap. Carol didn’t had the strength to push him away, no when he seemed to be needing someone to comfort him. “Sleep, Zach, you’re with us not, you’re safe.”

Zach closed his eyes, while on his hands seeked one her hers, gripping it tightly as if afraid that he would get separated again.

Carol continued to caress his hair softly as his breathing started to even out.

-.-.-.-

The deep tiredness he had felt from the sleepless night had seemed to catch up with him. He had turned on his side, blocking the sounds of the men around him and had gone to sleep not long after the whole rabbit issue had been solved. 

He had needed a good night of sleep after barely sleeping watching after his kids. Daryl’s breath caught in his throat as he thought of Beth and Zach for a moment, of how Zach had somehow adopted Carol and him as his kind of parents; how Beth had lost her father just a few days before. And now he had lost them both. 

He stood up, getting his things together as the people around them seemed to be doing the same. He needed to find his brothers and his woman, and then he would find his fucking kids. 

All that was after killing Joe and his fuckwits. 

He avoided looking at the blood stains on the floor, and at the body outside the shop. He needed to keep his head down and follow this men until he had more idea of where his brothers were. And when he found them, well… he needed to fucking learn that prayer once and for all. 

Joe had started a conversation quickly with him, and Daryl had fallen into that headspace he had seemed to fall whenever Merle went into one of his moods. Answer when he was spoken too, think of other things meanwhile. 

The liquor Joe had passed him was not even close to what him and the kids had had just a few days before, and he knew the feeling on his stomach was not the alcohol. Not at all. 

They reached the train tracks once again. “We’re getting closer.” One of the guys told them as him and Joe climbed the steep up to join them.

“Have you seen this before?” Daryl asked, looking at the map and message at the side of the tracks. Terminus.

“Oh yeah, and I’m going to tell you what it is,” Joe said as he stood beside him looking the sign over, “that’s a lie. There’s no sanctuary for all. They’re not going to welcome guys like like you and me with open arms.”

Daryl wanted to scream at him, he wanted to rant and tell him that he was wrong. That he had a sanctuary, that  he had been accepted, that he was loved. That he was not like them, he had a woman that he loved above everyone else; that he had two brothers that he would gladly give his life for. That he had a kid that while he wasn’t his, he sometimes felt like he was. 

He had a family, he had his own sanctuary. 

He followed them down the tracks, catching up to Joe once again. “That’s where we’re headed?”

“So now you’re asking?”

Daryl shrugged.

“ We were in a house minding our own business and this walking piece of fecal matter was hiding in the home. Strangled our colleague Lou and left him to turn. Lou came at all of us. He lit out. We tracked him to these tracks, one of those signs, and thus we've got a destination in mind.”

Daryl’s heart started to beating fast. It hadn’t been Murphy, they would have killed him on sight if it had been. But that didn’t mean it couldn’t have been Connor. Or Glenn, or Rick. “You see his face?”

“Only Tony, and that’s enough for a reckoning.” Daryl nodded, squinting his eyes as he saw Tony stop, looking at something on the side. 

The word was on the tip of his tongue, it would be so easy to yell it out and get that mushroom for himself.

Daryl walked past Tony, his belly empty but his mind at ease. He was getting closer to his family, he was sure of that.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the deal... I'm going on vacations tomorrow... so that means that there's probably going to be a delay on the next chapter. I'm going to aim for sometime next week, but I can't promise anything. 
> 
> Thank you guys for your continuous support, you're all incredible.


	14. Chapter XIV - A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys... I'm trash.... it's so late. I'm so sorry. Love you.
> 
> Thanks to the amazing alannastara, memoriesinatrunk, and onequarterbritish for all your support. You guys kept me going.

**Chapter XIV**

**A**

 

They had found what used to be a camp by chance, giving them a chance to get some sleep and recover some of their strength before the leg of their journey. They were getting closer to Terminus, and Connor’s nerves seemed to just escalate with each step closer to their goal. 

He didn’t know what he would do if his brothers weren’t there when they got there, if Carol wasn’t there. The only thing would be to get out there and start looking in every corner, under every stone. He would not leave a house unchecked until he found the rest of his family. That was a given. 

The morning was cold, and the four of them were huddled around the fire that they had managed to light boiling water while trying to divide the meager amount of food they had been able to catch the day before. 

“How hungry are you?” Rick asked Carl, a smile on his face as he tried to make peace with his son, “from a scale of one to ten?” Connor couldn’t help but chuckle as he saw the two of them try for once. 

“Fifteen.” Carl chuckled. 

Rick turned to look at Michonne. “Twenty eight.”

Michonne in turn, looked at Connor. “Nine and three quarters.”

“Nerd.” Michonne said, bumping shoulders with him, not noticing the flash of jealousy that appeared on Rick’s face as she did that. 

“What?”

“Nine and Three Quarters,” Carl said mimicking Connor’s accent. “Who says that?”

Both Michonne and Connor looked at Carl like he had grown a second head. Rick frowned as he looked from the two of them, to his confused son. 

“Harry Potter? Platform nine and three quarters?”

“Oh…” Carl made a face, “I think I saw the first movie, once? I didn’t … like… them?”

Carl stopped at the look of bewilderment on both Michonne and Connor’s faces. 

“We need to get him the books,” Michonne muttered as she turned to talk to Connor, who only nodded still looking at Carl funny. 

“They were books?”

“What... the... fuck?” Connor said eyes round as he looked at Carl, making the boy giggle as he finally let onto the fact that he was messing with him.

“You’re such a little Slytherin,” Connor mumbled as he chuckled. 

“And you’re the big goody two shoes Gryffindor I take?” Michonne asked as she helped Rick divide the clean water into the empty cans. 

“Nah, Lass, Hufflepuff through and through.”

“Ha!” 

“Don’t mock the badgers.”

“You are such nerds,” Carl stated as he looked from Michonne to Connor and back to his dad, who was looking as lost as the two of them. 

“Well, it’s been a while,” Rick said as he moved to get rid of the stick he had been using, “I’m going to go check the snares to see if we can have something else for breakfast.”

“Can I got with you?” Carl’s question made Rick smile down at his son, surprised by it. 

“How else you’re going to learn?”

Father and son shared a smile, in turn making Michonne and Connor share one of theirs. It was a first step, at least. 

“You should come too,” Rick said as he looked down at Michonne. “You need to learn too.”

“Why should I? If I have three strapping gentlemen to keep me fed.”

“Pfffffft,” Connor said as he drank his share of the water. “Go feed me, woman.”

“Do you say that to Carol too?”

Neither of them noticed Rick’s face. 

“Are you bonkers? She would have my balls if I ever said something like that.”

“Newsflash lucky charms, she already has them.”

“Too much information, again!” Carl’s outburst made the two of them laugh, as Connor moved to bring out his rosary from under his shirt as he watched the three of them getting ready to leave. 

“Go, I’ll wait here, look after the fort. Don’t be long.”

“Take care, old man.” Connor was still chuckling at Carl’s words long before they had left. 

He started his morning prayers once he was alone. A rosary to ask for protection for his family, and to pray for forgiveness for his sins was long due, after all. 

-.-.-

When Murphy woke up he noticed that he had his face smushed against Carol’s thigh, he was lying on his back and everything hurt. 

“It’s really early still, Murph, try and get some more sleep.” He moved away as he felt Carol’s hand running through his hair, to smile softly up at her. She looked dead tired, probably from having spent most of the night on watch since there wasn’t anyone else who would do it. Not after Zach had basically fallen asleep on her lap. 

“You got any sleep?” Murphy mumbled as he sat up, groaning as he felt his stitches pull. He tried to mask his pain, but one look at Carol made his realized he had failed. 

“I’m not tired.” Carol looked down at the still deep asleep Zach, whose face was burrowed against her stomach still. 

“Liar.” He could see the tiny smile she tried to hide. He knew her, and she had to be dead tired. “We need to find a place where we can hide up tonight, you can’t continue at this pace.”

“I’ll be fine, Muffin.”

“Do not muffin me, Woman.” Carol was still not looking at him, “you need to rest sometime, who’s gonna keep our asses alive if you faint on me cause you’re overexerting yourself?”

“It’s nothing.”

“Have you eaten something?” Her silence gave her away. “Here…” Murphy passed her a water bottle, not resting until she took it and took a couple of sips from it. 

“And now, give me that…” Carol finally looked at him, shaking her head when she saw his outstretched hand waiting for her rifle. “Gimme.”

“You’re hurt, Murphy.”

“And I will yell if someone comes, or I’ll wake Tyreese to do something for once.” Carol gave him a look at his comment. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m not going to let you run yourself ragged because he’s not up to helping you, and I’m only giving him till later today to hm too.” 

Carol glared at Murphy as he looked at Zach, her motherly instincts telling her to protect the boy that was clinging to her as if he was her own. “He is helping you, I’m not losing you either.”

“Now,” Murphy pulled her by the shoulders, smiling when she allowed him to move her without tensing up, not even a little bit, “you’re sleeping, I’ll wake you if we need you.” He kept on pulling until she was draped over his own lap.

“Love you, Murph.”

“Love you, stubborn woman.” 

-.-.-.

Connor had been about to finish the Litany, kneeling in the middle of their camp when he heard the hurried steps start getting closer to him. At once he was on his feet, turned and with his gun out. 

“Run!” Michonne whispered yelled at him as he saw the three of them run past their made up camp, as a small herd came up behind them. 

They didn’t need to tell him twice, grabbing his bag and getting in between the bar wire. He quickly caught up with them, trotting as they kept on looking back to see how far away the undead were from them at all times. 

They reached the tracks, the damned tracks they had been following for days now. Only to find themselves surrounded from both sides. 

Rick gave him a look, as he put his gun away and brought out his knife. Just before the two of them went to work on the smaller walker group. They had an understanding, Michonne and Carl were family to them both and so they were priority. 

They could live with that understanding. 

Between the two of them, with Michonne watching their backs with her katana, they finished off the group in front of them easily enough to allow them to continue their way. 

“Let’s go,” Rick said as he started trotting away from the herd behind them, Michonne quickly following leaving Connor and Carl at the back. 

Silence fell upon them once again. Connor had no idea what had exactly happened, but Carl was back to a somber mood, one he had seemed to not have been before they had left him that morning. 

The pace they kept on was a hash one, and Conor was surprised Rick was able to handle it. After all it hadn’t been that long ago that the man had been half beaten to dead. 

“I thought we could have found some houses in here,” Michonne said after they had been half trotting half walking down the road, away from the tracks for a good half an hour without having found anything. “Maybe a store, there’s got to be some food around here.”

Connor noticed how she was breathing hard, her hands shaking where she had been trying to hide them from Carl. The boy did not need to know that the adults weren’t exactly handling things well. That was the last thing he needed. 

“Hey, look!” Carl’s voice made Connor look towards where the boy was pointing, at an abandoned truck in the middle of the road. 

Without a word the four of them fastened their steps, pulling out their weapons as they moved to cover all the truck’s sides. There was no such thing as being too cautious nowadays.

Michonne killed the lone walker on the other side of the road. The truck was clear, they had a place to sleep now. 

-.-.-.

“The way I see it, Noah…” Daryl felt like hitting his head against the closest tree if that would stop Joe from talking to him. Instead, he grunted pretending to pay attention. “There’s nothing worse than an outdoor cat, thinking they’re an indoor one… nothing.”

What the  _ fuck  _ was he talking about? They had been following the man the his group tracks since earlier that morning, and it was getting too much for him. Joe just would not stop talking, and he just couldn’t just blow the ‘leader’ off like it was the easiest thing. At least the man shared what passed as alcohol for him, there was something at least. 

“That’s what I thought you were at first, you seemed like you were a skittish pussy when we first met you.” Daryl tried to keep the snarl that he felt trying to appear on his face in check, “but you showed us that you weren’t, you know your rules and you follow them, and that, my friend…” Joe patted his back, and Daryl could feel as his nails threatened to open the skin on his hands as he closed his fist harder, “stepped up.”

“Joe!” Daryl thanked the stars over the fact that Tony had interrupted him, he really didn’t know how much longer he could keep it up. “We’re catching up, they’re a couple of hours ahead, tops.”

Daryl had run out of time. He had to stop them, so he would have to wait. He would have to make up something so he could catch them unaware and end them. He just hoped that Joe’s victims were strong enough to give him a hand. 

He fell behind Joe, trying to distinguish the tracks the other group had made after most of the men had already trampled over them. He could count at least four people. That would be enough to get rid of the scum he was traveling with. 

Now he just needed a plan. 

That and hope that it was someone from his group, because if they weren’t, who know who they were messing with?  

.-.-.-.-

They had barely traveled a few miles when they had decided for a place to spend the night. Murphy could feel the frustration coming off in waves from Carol as she and Zach cleared the small shed they had found in the middle of the woods. It wasn’t even big enough to be called a room, it was like someone had just decided to have a place where to stow things in the middle of nowhere. 

But it was better than sleeping outside, it was at least four walls and a roof. It was definitely more defendable than being in the middle of the woods praying to not to be found. 

“Zach…” the boy had barely spoken in most of the day, mostly staying close to him and Carol as if afraid they would disappear on him at any given moment. “You and Tyreese are going to take the first two shifts, wake me up for the third one.”

“I can take one,” Carol said from where she was cleaning Mika’s wound. Her mouth was twisted in the way that Murphy knew she was not liking what she was seeing, and that worried him. 

“Nah,” Tyreese answered as he covered the only window, “we got it, you need to sleep.”

“Yeah, Mama Carol,” Zach said softly, nudging her with his shoulder softly when she looked up at him, “you’ve been taking care of us, let us take care of you for once.”

“Carol,” Mika’s small voice was what finally broke her resolve, “can I sleep with you?” There was a small cot on the corner, where the ugly mutt had already made himself at home. 

“Murphy, we haven’t had the dog for a full day and you’re already letting it sleep on the furniture?”

The giggle that came out of Mika’s mouth made everyone smile a little bit, for a moment there they had almost been too late to hear it ever again. 

“Sorry, love, it was Declan.”

Carol could see the effort he was putting on trying to make the situation a little less tense, so with a knowing look she followed his lead. 

“That’s your answer for everything , Malachy, too bad it can’t apply right now.” Murphy saw with a smirk on his face as she helped Mika onto the cot, shooing the dog to the foot of the bed pushing the girl towards the side closest to the wall. 

“Well, I had to give it a try.”

She was still giving him a soft smile when he ushered all the men out of the shack, there was still a little bit of light to try and catch his ladies some food. 

They had to at least give it a try. 

-.-.-

Connor shuddered as they sat around the small fire Rick had made as he had been setting up and checking the snares. Carl was sleeping inside the run down truck, going to bed shortly after finishing their dinner. 

“That was a small rabbit,” Rick said trying to mask the grumbling of his stomach as he shuffled closer to the fire. The nights were progressively getting colder once again. 

“I’ll go see if anything got caught during the night, maybe we’ll have more luck then.” Connor gave his two companions a small smile, pretending not to see the look of longing Rick was giving Michonne. 

“Got to handle the thing, it sure hopped down fast…” Michonne pun was met with silence, “come on! that was funny.”

“Keep telling yourself that, lass…” Connor muttered as he moved to lie down on his side, his back to the fire giving resting his head on his arm as he closed his eyes to try and get some sleep. He had the last shift after all. 

“Have you noticed how much time we spend talking about food?” Connor closed his eyes as he heard Rick ask Michonne, trying to block out all the noise around him to try and get some sleep. There was something in the air though, something that kept telling him that things weren’t right. 

Something was going to happen. 

Michonne and Rick continued to talk behind him, and he couldn’t help but shiver when he felt Rick put out the meager fire they had going. It was getting cold, they needed to get to Terminus soon, he needed to make sure Carl was fine before he would start to see about looking for his brothers and Carol. 

Connor sat up as soon as he heard something moving in the bushes, looking from where he was sitting at Rick who was already on his feet. 

“What the fuck…” Connor muttered, frowning as he kept on looking at the forest, seeing from the side of his eye as Rick sat down again. 

“We let people in.”

“We did, and so did the governor.”

“Fuck that asshole,” Connor grumbled as he moved to lie down again. Grumbling as he tried to get comfortable before closing his eyes again. 

“Great use of language as usual MacManus.”

“Fuck you, Scáthach.”

“I have no idea of what that is, but fuck you too lucky charms.”

Rick chuckled, shaking his head as he looked from Connor’s back to Michonne’s smiling face. “I’m telling Carol on you…”

“Oh deary me…” Connor turned faster than he thought was possible, as he sat up only to find himself already at gunpoint by a man with a bandana on his head. His eyes immediately sought Michonne only to see as another man came from behind, kicking her katana away and pointing a gun at her head. 

“Today’s the day of reckoning, sir!” Connor snarled at the man with the gun on Rick’s head. “Restitution!”

Connor looked at the man, glaring as he started to speak. “What will you do on the day of reckoning, when disaster comes from afar? To whom will you run for help? Where will you leave your riches?”

“A man of God?!” Joe said as he laughed, looking at his men surrounding them his gun still pointed at Rick’s head. “Too bad your man here, did not believe in mercy since he killed out man in cold blood!” Connor could see Michonne breathing hard as he noticed that three other men  had joined them, “the balancing of the whole damn universe.”

“And I was thinking of turning in for the night on new year’s eve!” Connor could feel the weight of his gun where he had it tucked on the back of his pants, under his shirt. As well as his knife on his thigh holster. 

He tried to catch Michonne’s eyes, but she was looking at Rick and only at Rick. He wanted to turn to look at Carl, hearing someone moving behind him but the man pointing the gun at him took a step closer as he shifted his weight. 

“Now who’s going to countdown till the ball drops with me?”

“They haven’t dropped yet? Definitely explains why you’re such a pussy…” Connor muttered, smirking when he saw the flash of anger appear on Joe’s face at his comment. 

“Maybe I should kill you first, you’re a mouthy little shit after all…” Joe cocked his gun, raising it to point at Connor who looked at him dead on the eye. 

“I want to see you try, motherfucker.”

“Ha!” Joe laughed, making a head motion that had one of his men taking his place as he walked across the camp to look down at where Connor was kneeling. “I guess we have a volunteer after all…”

“What if I told you your redneck mother sucked so much dick, her face looks like an egg?” Connor smirked as he saw Joe tighten his jaw as he tried to keep himself calm enough in front of his men.

“I’m going to enjoy killing you, you faggot little shit.” Connor just continued to smirk, not breaking eye contact. He was trying to buy them time, Carl was safe as long as he stayed inside. Rick and Michonne could do something, they just needed time. 

“You just talk big-” his next words were blown again as someone interrupted them. 

“Joe!” He didn’t need to turn to know who it was, he didn’t even needed to look at Michonne who was looking behind him like she had seen a ghost. He knew that voice, he knew those steps. 

He started to turn when the gun was pushed further into his forehead. 

“Hold up!” Daryl said, as he looked from Joe to where he had Connor kneeling in front of him. His chest constricted and he felt as a cried got stuck on his throat. He knew what Joe was capable on, he knew he would kill Connor if given a chance. 

He couldn’t let anything happen to him, he would die first before letting anything happen to Connor. 

“You stopped me from doing something I was looking forward to, Noah!” Connor stiffened even more at the use of their father’s name. 

“Just hold up…” Connor could see Daryl’s boots from the side of his eyes, and he really wanted to look at his brother’s face. He needed to look at his brother’s face and see that he was alright. Daryl’s voice was raspy, and Connor was probably the only one that knew it was because he was emotional. 

The need to get to his brother side and see for himself that he was alright was making him tremble. He could feel Michonne’s eyes on him, and he met hers briefly. She was trying to keep him calm, keep him from doing something that could get them into more trouble. 

She didn’t know that he would lay down his own life for his brothers without a second thought. 

“This is the guy that killed Lou, so we got nothing to talk about!” The man pointing the gun at Rick answered, looking at Daryl briefly before setting his eyes back on Rick.

“And this asshole was running his mouth, I’m sick and tired of people just being disrespectful, aren’t you Noah?” Joe said, his eyes going from the Connor to Daryl and back, “but the thing about nowadays is that we got nothing but time.”

“Say your peace, Noah.”

Connor’s tightened his fist at his side as he heard Joe say their father’s name, again. 

Daryl looked from Joe to Connor, trying not to look like he was feeling. He felt like he was drowning, his head was buzzing and he had no idea of what to do. He didn’t know how they would get out of where they were right then. He had only one idea of how to get his brother out of there. 

“This people…” his eyes were on the side of Connor’s head, he wanted to see him, wanted to see his face one last time. “You’re going to let them go.” Daryl looked at Joe, not breaking eye contact, “this are good people.”

“I think Lou would disagree with you on that…” Daryl tried to not to grimace as he saw Joe push the barrel of the gun even closer to Connor’s forehead. “Of course I have to speak for him because your friend there…” he pointed towards the general direction where the other man had Rick at gunpoint. “strangled him on the bathroom.”

“You want blood, I get that…” Daryl said, a tint of desperation on his voice as he sneaked a look at Connor quickly before he threw his crossbow to the side. “Take it from me, man.”

“Daryl, stop it!” Connor hissed as he turned to glare at his brother, “fucking stop it!”

Joe took a step back, looking from Connor to Daryl before chuckling. “This is the brother you were talking so much about, then?”

“Daryl?” Joe’s mocking smile was back on his face. “So not only you’re lying when you say this people are ‘good people’ since they murdered our friend, and on top of that you were lying all along, Daryl…”

Connor sneered at Joe as he used his brother’s name as a curse. “And you know what we do to liars…”

Daryl rolled his eyes, “come on!” 

Connor made a sound like a wounded animal as he saw the two remaining men get the jump on Daryl. He could hear Daryl’s pained grunts as each hit landed, he was so focused on trying to get to Daryl that he didn't see Joe’s pistol come down on him as he hit him with it on the side of the head. 

“Connor!” He heard Daryl’s voice in the background, his head pounding as his vision swarmed as his face hit the ground. Everything turned around him, as he pushed himself back onto his knees, looking up at Joe as something wet ran down the side of his face. 

Joe smiled down at him. 

“Listen, it was me! It was only me!” Joe turned slightly to look over his shoulder as Rick yelled at him, and that’s when Connor saw his opportunity. The gun was still point blank to his forehead, but Joe’s attention was on Rick. 

He grabbed the gun, pointing it up as he started kicking Joe repetitively on the crotch,getting the gun from him and shooting him on the head without even looking at the people around them. 

As soon as the shot went off, he turned. He didn’t even seem to realize that he still had the gun on his hand, all he saw was that there were two men kicking Daryl as he layed on the ground. 

All he saw was two Russian mobsters taking Murphy away from him. With a scream, Connor tackled one of the man to the ground, barely avoiding falling on top of the fallen Daryl. There was nothing else to Connor than the man underneath him. There was nothing but the anger in his chest, and the need to unleash it by pounding on him. 

He didn’t even noticed that the man had long stopped moving. He did noticed when someone grabbed him by the waist from behind, snarling and thrashing as he was pulled away from the man that had hurt his brother. The man that was not going to be coming back as a walker for sure. 

“Connor, Connor!” Daryl yelled at his brother as he tried to keep htim from thrashing in his arms as he walked them both backwards away from where the slain bodies of the group he had been a part of laid on the ground. “Connor!”

Daryl suddenly let him go, moving further away as Connor turned on him with a snarl. His brother face was bathed in blood, some of his from the cut on his head from where Joe had whipped him with the gun, but most of it from the man he had plummeted to dead.

“Connor…” Daryl said softly, his hands shaking as he started to try and get closer to his brother. Connor’s eyes looked unfocused and he wasn’t sure if it was because of the possible concussion from the hit to the head of because of what had just happened. “Con…”

Daryl got close enough to throw his arms around his brother, burrowing his face against his neck as he clinged to him. He slowly felt as Connor started to realize what was happening, his breathing deepening as his arms started to moved grabbing onto the back of his vest and hugging him as close as he was able to. 

Daryl felt as one of Connor’s hand sneaked to grab onto the back of his head, and he couldn’t help but let a sob as tears ran down his cheeks and into his brother’s shirt. He had found him, and they were together, they were alive. 

And if he had found Connor, he would find Murphy and Carol. They would be together again, he just knew it. 

-.-.-.

Zach looked at the door of the shack as it opened, giving Murphy a small smile as the older man walked out of the room that held the rest of their family. 

“It’s been quiet,” Zach said softly as Murphy moved to sit by him. “I heard some gunshots not so long ago, but they were really far away.”

“Decks taught you well, didn’t he?” 

Zach gave him a sad smile, barely visible in the low light of the middle of the night. “I’m not going to be able to get any more sleep, you should go and take over the space I had, the mutt will take over if you don’t hurry.”

“I’m good…” Zach shrugged, not wanting to let the man see that he wasn’t going to be able to sleep either. After the night before, all he could think about was leaving Daryl behind. Leaving the man that had been more of a father figure than his own father behind, like the coward he was. 

After waking up finding himself wrapped around Carol, he had blushed and remained silent and distant most of the day.   He couldn’t believe they could eve stand to look at him after what he had done, after what he probably cost them. 

“Stop it, Zachary.” Murphy muttered as he pulled a cigarette from God knows were, followed by a zippo before lighting it up. “I can hear you thinking all the way over here.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be, it wasn’t your fault.” Zach startled as he heard those words coming from Murphy’s mouth. “We don’t blame you for anything, so stop blaming yourself.”

“But how can’t you? It was me that opened that door, it was me that made the mistake that could mean that…”

“Don’t even say it.” The only thing Zach could see in the darkness was the red from the tip of Murphy’s cigarette as he moved it to and from his mouth. “He’s alive, no doubt about it.”

“And Carol doesn’t blame you, she loves you.”

“I love her,” Zach said softly as he picked at the hole on his jeans.

“You called her Mama Carol when we found you, more than once.”

“It started as a running joke with Daryl…” Murphy closed his eyes at his brother’s name, feeling the pang of sadness that surrounded him missing the rest of his soul, “but it wasn’t completely a joke…”

“She’s easy to love.”

“She is…”

“I do have to say thank you.” Zach frowned as he looked at Murphy in wonder, “after what happened with Lizzie…” he had been told by Tyreese what had happened as the two of them stood guard on the girls during the afternoon, “she was starting to close up, she was thinking about it too much… you became the perfect distraction for her…”

“You’re welcome?”

“And I say that in the best way possible, you are helping her heal in a way, you’re reaching into the maternal side that she was trying to shut down on Mika because she was afraid the girl would blame her over what happened.”

“But…”

“It wasn’t her fault, but that’s my wife to be for you, my boy…”

“Daryl…”

“We’re all getting married once we find each other again, I already asked.”

“He loves her.”

“We know.”

-.-.-.

“Did you were expecting to catch something with this?” Connor couldn’t help but smile as he turned to look at where Daryl was shaking his head as he looked at the empty snares he had put up the night before. “This is just sad.”

“Shut up, Declan.” There was no bite on Connor’s words, the small smile he got from Daryl at that made it obvious. 

Connor grimaced as he spotted some blood he hadn’t gotten rid of as him and Daryl had washed up on the river a few minutes before, the cold water feeling good on his busted knuckles. 

It had taken them a long time to calm down the night before after what had happened. He wasn’t sure how long exactly they had stood in each other’s arms crying before they pulled away. Words were barely spoken between the two of them as they had worked on the bodies scattered around their camp, they needed to move them away before they called walkers to them. 

They had no idea what had happened to Rick, Michonne and Carl, other than Rick being covered in blood just like Connor was; while Michonne had refused to be separated from Carl for even a moment. 

Connor understood that feeling perfectly. 

So they had gotten rid of the bodies, him and Daryl, while Rick stood guard over the truck. And after they had moved the bodies far enough, they had gone out to look for water and the snares. 

Those words, from Daryl, were the first ones they had spoken that had nothing to do with what had happened the night before. 

“I thought I had taught you better than this, Carol knows better than this.”

“And I can’t argue with that…” Connor felt something swell on his chest as Daryl threw an arm around his shoulders pulling him close to him as he got close enough. Connor’s stomach rumbling made Daryl smile a little bigger. “Yeah, yeah, yeah…”

Daryl chuckled as Connor pushed him away, bringing up his crossbow to point at something that moved in front of them knowing that Connor would know to keep quiet at that. The exclamation of victory from Connor as he let the bold fly and catch a fat rabbit on the head made him shake his head in amusement. 

“I found hers and Murphy’s tracks,” Daryl said softly as he walked towards the dead rabbit, picking it up by the arrow. “I lost them a couple of days ago, thought, I tried to find them again but…”

Connor elbowed Daryl softly on the side, grimacing when he grunted in pain. “It’s okay, we’ll find them, I’m sure of it.”

Daryl nodded, passing Connor the dead rabbit before reloading his crossbow as he stalked a fat squirrel that he had seen a few trees away. The sound of the bolt flying and hitting the target making him smile a little bit. 

“I’m glad to know they’re together, Murphy is awful at directions so we know at least that Carol will keep him from ending up in Mexico or something.” 

Daryl snorted, as he bagged the squirrell without saying a word. Connor apparently had no idea of what had happened before the prison fell, Connor had no idea of what Rick had done. If he did? Rick would have probably been dead, based on what he had seen the night before. 

He couldn’t tell Connor what Rick had done, he would kill Rick. He couldn’t let his brother to that to Carl’s father, not when they all cared about that boy so much. What he was going to do was, he was going to help Rick and his family get to Terminus, and then him and Connor were going to leave. They were going to leave and not come back until he had  _ his  _ family with him. His whole family. 

“What happened out there, Decks?” Connor asked once they had moved closer to the road, the sounds of the woods around them waking up with the morning light the only thing around them. “How did you end up with them?”

“I didn’t, not at the beginning…” Daryl muttered as he shot another squirrel. “Beth came upon both Zach and I, we had to run out of there…”

“I know,” Connor answered the unsaid statement, “I know you had to, I know.” Daryl nodded, throwing the squirrel at him. 

“We made our way to the shack, thought of waiting for you assholes there.”

“I got hit in the head, Rick was not doing so good… we were trying to get to the general direction of the shack when…”

“Man, you’re bad at this.” Daryl snorted as he looked at his brother over his shoulder, “the shack is like 40 miles, that direction.” He pointed at the direction opposite to where they were going. 

“Bollocks.”

“You wouldn’t have found anything there… Zach and Beth burnt it down.” Daryl chuckled, blushing lightly. “The losers were trying to have survivor’s sex and I came back to see both of them all wide eyed as the house burnt down.”

Connor laughed, getting closer once again and patting Daryl’s shoulder. The need to be physically close to his brother not diminishing as the night went through. 

“I lost them two days ago.”

Without saying anything Connor moved, putting a hand on the back of Daryl’s neck and turning him so he could hug him once again. Daryl’s shoulders dropped as he allowed his older brother to bring him closer, not caring about the fact that he had dropped his crossbow yet again on the ground as he used that arm to hug Connor closer. 

“It ain’t your fault, whatever happened it isn’t on you.”

Daryl shook his head against Connor’s shoulder, trying to keep his breathing under control. 

“No, I won’t let you do this…” Connor pushed Daryl back, pushing his forehead against his making his brother look at him. “You are not going to blame yourself for what happened, no more than I am. This wasn’t on you.”

“I was the one taking care of them.”

“Hey, listen to me Daryl Declan…” Daryl shook his head, closing his eyes as he heard Connor say his full name. Full names only came out for important shit. “Whatever happened, whatever you think you did or didn’t do, it doesn’t matter… whatever it is, it doesn’t make me love you any less.”

Daryl, eyes still closed, nodded before moving to burrow his face on Connor’s shoulder once again. Connor just hugged him as he tried himself to keep his own tears at bay. The two kids were lost, he had no idea what had happened to them. 

But they were still here.

-.-.-.-

Zach had finally gone to sleep about half an hour after his shift had officially ended. The boy had looked a little better after they had spoken, at least he had seemed less reluctant to go to sleep. Murphy knew sleep was sometimes worse than being awake, even in the nightmare they seemed to live nowadays. 

It was in sleep when he could still see Connor, when he still could feel him right beside him. It was in dreams when he could find himself back home in Ireland, showing everything to Daryl and Carol. It was in his dreams when he was still whole, and not just half of a soul. 

The sound of the door opening behind him made Murphy look over his shoulder, a small smile appearing on his face as he saw Carol come out of the room with a sleepy Judith on her hip. 

“Hello, princess…” Murphy muttered as he accepted Judith in exchange for his rifle as the baby gave her arms to him. She quickly settled herself on his chest, tucking her head under his chin as her small hands started to play with his shirt collar. “Morning, love.” 

Carol moved to give him a small peck on the lips as she sat herself on his good side, making sure he was able to keep Judith well placed with his good arm under her bottom as his bad one layed across his lap. “You hurting?”

“Just here…” Murphy said puckering up as he turned to look at her. “I might need another kiss to make it better.”

“You’re a joke.” Carol said chuckling softly as she reached and did as she had been asked, her hand caressing his cheek before sitting back down and taking over his watch. 

“You got any sleep?”

“Shouldn’t that be my question, Care?” Murphy asked, looking at Carol’s face as if trying to figure her out. 

“Murph…”

“I’m good, it still hurts like a b-i-t-c-h if I try to move it but I’ll live.”

Carol shook her head as he spelled the curse word instead of saying it, at least he had remembered that. Judith was almost at the age when she was going to start talking. And fuck or bitch weren’t going to be her first words. She was going to make sure of that. 

“You?” Murphy asked again, eyes still on Carol. 

“I slept, Mika had a nightmare, we talked a little.”

“I didn’t hear…”

“I woke up because she was using me as a pillow, she’s being really quiet.” Murphy sighed as he felt Carol rest her head against’ his shoulder.  Mika was apparently healing fine, but understandably she had been a lot more quiet than usual. 

“It’s always the most innocent ones, the one that suffer the most.”

“But we’re going to make sure it isn’t the case with you, right princess?” Murphy couldn’t help but chuckle as he heard Carol speaking to Judith as the baby just let out a huge yawn.

“We’re getting closer to Terminus, do you think they’ think they’re going to be there?” Her words were for him now, and he dropped a kiss o Judith’s hair before answering. 

“If they aren’t, we’ll just make sure they will be fine and we’re off to look for him… we’re getting closer. I just know it.”

-.-.-.-.

Daryl had left Connor to cook their breakfast after the two of them had checked on Carl and Michonne. The boy was still asleep clinging to her, and neither of them seemed needed to wake him up until they had the food ready. He had finally fallen asleep a few hours ago, according to what Michonne had whispered to them. 

Rick was sitting against the side of the truck when Daryl finally approached him, face still smeared with blood and not completely there. Daryl, who had in his hands one of the water bottles they had filled up at the stream, pulled out his rag from his back pocket wetting it with the water before trying to give it to Rick. 

“You should save it to drink…” Rick said, looking at Daryl but not really looking at him. 

“Con and I got more, and the stream is just about a mile away, we can go get more.” Daryl pushed the rag closer to him, trying to make him grab it. “You can’t see yourself, but they can.”

With a sigh, Daryl sat down beside Rick, throwing a look over his shoulder at where Connor was in front of the fire. He grimaced when his eye throbbed suddenly, reminding him that he had not left unscattered last night. 

“I didn’t know they were coming for you, I hoped…” at Rick’s look Daryl continued, “I was planning on killing them, they didn’t deserve to live…”

“Last night…”

“He had my brother at gunpoint, every plan I ever made just flew out of my head as I saw that…” Daryl rested his head against the truck behind him, “I did what he would have done.”

“How long were you with them?” Daryl could feel Rick’s eyes on the side of his face, but he didn’t meet his eyes. He was still angry at him, he was still seething inside. 

“Couple of days, I was with Beth and Zach before.”

“They’re dead?”

Daryl finally looked at Rick. “They’re just gone.” Rick nodded.

“After I lost them, they found me… I was lost, I needed something.”

“You were alone.”

“I knew they were looking for someone, and I also knew what I would have to do if they did find them…”

“It’s not on you, Daryl.”Daryl sighed once again, shaking his head as he didn’t meet Rick’s eyes. “Hey…” Daryl raised his eyes to meet Rick’s, “is not on you.”

“You being here with us, that’s everything…” Daryl nodded, looking down at his lap, feeling his pocket with his hand to check on his most treasured possessions as it had become a second nature. 

Silence fell upon them, once again. 

“Daryl…” Daryl turned to look at Rick once again as he heard his name. “You are my brother…”

“No, I’m not.” Daryl’s answer wasn’t what Rick was clearly expecting, as he looked startled as his words weren’t met with elation or sentimentality. Daryl’s words were just a matter of fact. 

“Of course I’m not, I mean, we’re not blood…” Rick said frowning looking at the man beside him, at the man he had relied so much on during the past year. “but you know, here.” He touched his chest, feeling dread as he saw Daryl continue to softly shake his head in denial. 

“If you would have told me that, six months ago…” Daryl chuckled as he threw a look over his shoulder at his brother once again, “I would have believed you, man.”

“But now? I have brothers, and they’re nothing like you…”

“Daryl…” there was something on Rick’s voice that didn’t agree with Daryl, it was the way he said them like he was judging him, like he was scolding a disruptive kid. 

“Why didn’t you tell Connor about what you did?”

“What?” Rick asked, frowning as the two of them started to tense up.

“Why didn’t you tell Connor what happened to Carol? What you did to her?”

“I didn’t think it was important, we needed to regroup first.”

“You didn’t tell him because you knew he would kick your ass, and leave you behind.” Daryl whispered, sneering at him. “You didn’t tell him because you needed him, to protect you, to protect your kid.”

“Daryl…”

“While you left Carol...” Daryl clenched his fist as he barely kept himself from punching Rick. “While you left our woman behind, like she was disposable.”

“Daryl, I didn’t know, I had no idea…”

Daryl raised a hand to stop his stammering answer. “You didn’t need to know, but know this… the only reason why I haven’t told my brother, is because he would kill you.” 

Rick threw a look to Connor over Daryl’s shoulder. 

“And we love Carl too much to do that to him, we’re done Rick Grimes. We get to Terminus, we leave you three in there and we’re going to go look for the rest of our family.”

Neither of them noticed that Michonne and Carl were inside the truck, hanging onto every single one of their words. 

-.-.-.-

It had taken them longer than she wanted to get everyone up and about. The sun was already higher up the sky than it was supposed to when they left the shack and started back on the tracks. Their group was slow, and full of injured people. But they were alive, and if they continued their pace they would probably get there by the end of the day. 

And that meant tomorrow they could head out to look for Daryl. 

“Come on, peanut.” Zach said chuckling as he pushed Mika softly on her good shoulder, prepared to catch her if she moved more than he expected. Mika glared up at him, her frown letting go as she saw him smiling down at her. “Move it.” Zach hurried his pace a little turning, and walking backwards giving Carol and Murphy a wink over Mika’s head. “You’re really slow, you know that? And small…”

“And you’re a little shit...” Mika muttered, hurrying her pace a little to try and catch up with him. 

“Mika!” Carol said, laughter in her voice as she watched from Zach’s surprised face, to Mika’s frowning one. 

“He is!”

“He really is, love, can’t blame the girl from telling the truth.”

Carol chuckled again, raising a hand to her face before she turned and hid her face on Murphy’s good shoulder. Her whole self trembling as she tried to contain her laughter. 

The smile on both Zach’s and Mika’s face, as Murphy winked at them, made him grin. 

“You did not hear any of that, princess, none of that.” Carol continued to laugh as Tyreese passed them by, Judith on his arms also giggling together with the rest of them. 

There was a certain levity that came from a good night of sleep, there seemed to be. 

-.-.-.

Connor put a hand on Carl’s neck, moving it back as he saw the boy flinch slightly at the weight of it. Michonne had told them what had happened when Carl and Rick had gone to get more water before they left. How that man had tried to do that to Carl, thing that made him want to turn back the time and kill that disgusting man all over again. 

“You still got some of that chocolate?” Connor asked Carl, trying to break the silence that had fallen upon them as Michonne and Rick talked softly to each other up front. Daryl perked up at the mention of chocolate, and Connor smiled softly at his little brother. 

“I lost it somewhere,” Carl said mournfully, sighing as he kicked a rock away from his path. 

“Well, I might be convinced to share one of this…” The smile, even as small as it was, that appeared on Carl’s face as Connor pulled out a snickers bar from his pack was worth it. Connor gave him the chocolate, tapping on his hat lightly as the boy quickly tore the wrapper off and cut a chunk of it. 

With a smile, Carl passed back the chocolate to Connor, where a third of it had only been cut off. “It’s yours…”

“We always share.”

Connor shook his head, tearing a third of the chocolate before passing the remaining piece to Daryl. Daryl who didn’t nibble onto it like him and Carl were doing, but just put the whole piece into his mouth. “What?”

Carl laughed, moving closer to Connor as they walked giving him the permission to put his arm around his shoulder as he had done many times before. The three of them continued trade barbs, with Connor trying to trip Daryl ever so often, and Daryl letting him as it made Carl laugh as they did so. 

They had walked that way for a few yards when Carl broke the silence. “You’re leaving as soon as we get there, aren’t you?”

Daryl stiffened, looking over his shoulder at Carl seeing in his eyes the fact that he had heard him and Rick speaking. He knew what had happened now, he knew and he was not saying anything for the same reason he was. He gave him a small nod, getting one in return. 

“We have to, deputy…” Connor sighed, “we need to find Murph and Carol. We just need to make sure they aren’t there, and if they aren’t… well…”

“Can I come with you?”

“Carl…” it was Daryl this time around the one that spoke, he knew the reasoning behind Carl’s words better than Conor did. “Your dad isn’t going to come with us.”

“Fuck him!” 

Both Michonne and Rick turned to look at him, as he had raised his voice. Carl blushed, hiding his face as he avoided looking at them. Rick threw Connor a look that Daryl answered back with a glare, making his former friend turn and go back to his conversation with Michonne. 

“He’s still your dad.”

“I want to find Murphy and Carol too…” there was almost a whine to his words, and Connor couldn’t help but smile as he acted like the boy he truly was. 

“We’ll find them, and we’ll bring them to you.” Carl threw a look at Daryl at Connor’s words, they both knew it was definitely not going to happen once Connor knew what his father had done. 

Daryl ended the conversation when he saw Rick approach a sign on the floor, walking closer to see the map in it. “We’re getting closer, we’ll be there by sundown.”

“Now we head through the woods, we don’t know who they are…”

“Fool me once, shame on you… fool me twice, shame on me…” Connor muttered softly so only Daryl and Carl would hear him as he followed the two of them off the road. Daryl as usual was back at being in front of everyone, and Connor’s big brother instincts wanted to grab him by the back of his vest and push him behind him. 

But Daryl was not Murphy, and Daryl would not let him. 

They walked a mile at the most in silence, prepared for any kind of ambush they could fall prey of, when a metal chain fence finally appeared in front of them. Daryl signaled them to follow his footsteps, leading them until they were all able to see through it. 

They had arrived to terminus, at last. The place announced it’s name with big capital letters on the top, the place was silent with no movement that made them think of anything bad happening… or anything good for what matters. 

“We’ll spread out, watch for a while, see what will happen.” Daryl gave Rick a nod, turning on his heel and not having to wait and see if Connor was coming with him. He knew his brother would always have his back. 

They silently moved following the fence to the south, the familiarity of their relationship making easy for them to do so. The view stayed the same, silence and no signs of life… or unlife. 

“You think it’s legit?” Connor asked as Daryl stopped once again to check on the place. 

Daryl shrugged, “Who knows… this is the best we can do.”

“Are you okay? You got hit kinda bad…”

“I’m good,” Daryl pressed his thumb against his broken lip. “I’ve got worse.”

Connor smiled, patting Daryl on the back as they started to make their way back to the others. “Carol is going to kick your ass, for looking like you do…”

Daryl sighed, feeling as his head started to throb. He hated to keep things from his brothers, he hated to lie to Connor this way. He was going to tell him, soon. 

“She’s not going to do that…”

“She’s going to try to kiss it and make it better, don’t ya think?” 

“She might do that…”

They were still smiling when they arrived by Rick’s side. Rick who was burying the bag of arms he had been carrying since that morning, the spoils of having killed all of Joe and his band of men. 

“Better safe than sorry,” Rick muttered as he looked at them, finishing the job as they waited for Michonne and Carl to come back. 

As soon as the two of them joined them, they left their packs a few yards away from the fence, before following Rick as he jumped over it. They were going in. 

Guns drawn out, silently they followed Rick for a few yards before Daryl took over as usual. Connor made sure that Carl was covered at all times, while guarding their back.His heart clenched when he saw Daryl go in first into the building, and he soon followed. 

The sound of a woman’s voice, made them both look at each other in puzzlement as Daryl slowly entered the room with Conor fast on his heels. “What the fuck is this place?” Connor whispered to his brother as they looked around, people were working on making those maps that had brought them there. While in fact it was a white haired woman with headphones making an announcement into a mic. 

Connor was turning to say something to Daryl again, when Rick walked past him towards the woman. “Hello? Hello?” 

Daryl shifted closer to Connor, his crossbow ready as they looked as the people around them stopped working to focus on them. 

“I bet Albert, is on perimeter watch.” A gangly man said, throwing the paintbrush he was using to make signs down. The man walked from behind the tables, walking closer towards them. “Are you here to rob us?”

Connor looked at Carl on his other side, sharing a look with the boy. He needed to stay calm, they needed to stay calm. 

“No.” Rick’s voice resounded across the half empty warehouse. “We wanted to see you, before you saw us.” Rick walked towards the man, putting his gun back into his holster in a sign of good faith. 

“Makes sense.” The man smiled at them, and Connor could feel the hairs on his arms rise at that gesture. He wanted to shout at Daryl to not follow Rick’s example, as he saw his brother lower his bow, but it seemed more dangerous to do that. “We usually do this where the tracks meet but…” Connor lowered his gun a little, finger still close to the trigger. “Welcome to terminus.”

Daryl found his brother’s eyes, silently nodding at him letting him know they were not lowering their guard. 

“I’m Gareth… and you look like you have been out there for a good bit.” Connor huffed, that was definitely an understanding. 

Rick’s raspy “Yeah,” took the attention away from him. “I’m Rick, that’s Carl, Connor, Daryl, Michonne.”

The man awkwardly waved at them, and both Daryl and Connor’s hands tightened around their weapons. 

“You’re nervous, I get it, we were all the same way.” Daryl took a step closer to Connor as Gareth moved suddenly forward. “We came here for sanctuary…” Gareth stopped in front of Rick, “is that what you’re here for?”

“Yes.” Rick was doing all the talking, as their defacto leader. To be honest, Connor knew Daryl was on the same boat, to let the man do what he pretended he did the best… negotiate. 

“Alex!” A man from the back started to walk towards Gareth after being called, “it’s not as pretty as the front, we got nothing to hide but the welcome wagon is a lot more nicer.”

“I bet,” Connor muttered as Gareth looked briefly at him before turning his attention back to Rick. 

“Alex will take you, ask you some questions… but first,” Gareth said looking again away from Rick and to the rest of them. “We need to see everyone’s weapons. If you can just lay them down in front of ya…”

Rick looked at Daryl, before turning back to Gareth. “Alright…” he said  moving to put his gun down on the floor. The rest of them followed his example, Connor and Daryl making identical slight grimaced of discomfort at feeling bare without their weapons. 

“I’m sure you understand…” 

“Yes, I do.” 

Connor glared at Alex as he moved to Daryl first, just as his brother had dropped his knife by his crossbow. Daryl raised his arms, his head turned slightly his eyes meeting Connor’s as he was patted down. “I would hate to see the other guy…” Alex said jokingly as Daryl flinched as he felt the unknown man’s hands on him. 

“If you don’t hurry you might get to see it on the mirror…” Connor muttered, earning a small smile from Daryl as Alex quickly moved onto Connor after processing the words. 

“They deserved it?” Alex asked Connor, patting him down quicker than usual before moving to Carl. 

“Yes,” Carl said with a snarl on his face as he got his pat down. His whole body was tense, his hands shaking from where he was keeping them up.

Rick looked at his son, while Gareth did his own pat down on him. “Just so you know, we’re not that kind of people. But we aren’t stupid either.”

Connor snorted, earning himself a glare from both Rick and Gareth. “Sorry…” he muttered. 

“And you shouldn’t be stupid enough, to try anything stupid. As long as everyone is clear on that, we shouldn’t have any problems, just solutions.”

Connor didn’t keep his eyes off Alex as he moved to pick up Michonne’s sword, giving it to her shortly after. 

“We got it,” was Connor’s gruff response as he saw Alex move down to grab Daryl’s crossbow, to what his brother only moved faster taking it from him as well as his knife before he even got close to touch it. “Family heirloom, nothing personal.” The look on Alex’s face, as Connor put his arm around Daryl’s shoulder and gave him a smile, made Daryl chuckle softly. 

Alex eagerly moved down the line to Connor, Carl and finally to Rick. 

“Follow me.”

And they did. Connor and Daryl moved in sync, following Alex becoming a barrier between him, and Michonne and Carl. 

“How long have you been here?” Daryl asked as they squinted as the bright light of day hit their eyes as they followed Alex out of a door leading to a courtyard. 

“From almost the beginning, the camps got overrun people started finding this place.” The place around them had flowerbeds, kept nicely as if just for show. And the hairs on the back of the neck of both Daryl and Connor started to rise. “I think it was instinct, you know? To follow a path?”

Daryl whistled softly, catching Connor’s attention to the ornament plants standing to the side. Why use good soil to plant lets say roses, instead of something they could actually eat? Did they do not needed the food source? Who didn’t need extra food in these days?

“Some folks headed to the cost, some others to the west, some up north…” Alex had led them to a grill where a woman was grilling meat. Meat that did not smell like anything Daryl had ever hunted. “But everyone ended up here.”

“Hi,” the woman said as she looked at them from behind the grill, “heard you came through the back door, very smart.” Daryl snorted at her words, hiding it behind a fake cough. “You’ll fit right in here.”

“Mary, would you mind fixing this folks a plate for me?”

Daryl’s hold on his crossbow tightened as he failed to identify the smell of the meat, it was bothering him since he was sure he knew the smell and flavor to every single thing you could legally and illegally grill in Georgia. 

He caught Connor’s eye, again, finding the uneasiness he felt reflected on his brother’s eyes. 

“Why you do it? Why do you let people in?” Michonne asked Alex, as Rick and the rest of them observed the people around them. 

“When people become a part of us, we get stronger. That’s why we put up the signs.”

Connor followed Rick’s eyes, finding him looking at a man wearing SWAT gear. And suddenly everything made sense.

“Invite people in, that’s how we survive… here.” Alex passed Carl a plate, a plate that got thrown to the ground as Daryl slapped it out of Carl’s hands.

As soon as Daryl did that, Rick came forward grabbing something from Alex’s pocket as he put his arm around the man’s neck with his other hand pointing his gun to his temple. 

Everyone had their weapons out and ready as they covered each other’s backs. 

“Where the hell did you get this watch?” Rick asked Alex, as he tightened his hold on the man’s neck. 

Daryl looked nervously around them, he could see people moving out and about, guns being drawn. There were too many of them, he looked quickly at the way they had came through, trying to remember the way Alex had brought them through. 

“You want answers? You want anything else? You’ll get them when you put down the gun.”

“I see your man up there with a sniper rifle, how good is his aim? Cause here I have Connor that can probably hit him with a single bullet before he has a chance to shoot his first.”

Connor looked up at the sniper, seeing another one join him at the roof across. He could probably hit both of them from there. 

“Where did you get the watch?” Rick asked Alex as he pushed his gun further into the man’s temple. 

“Don’t do anything, I got this!” Alex yelled, looking scared at the man on the roof, “put it down, put it down!” 

Connor shared a quick look with Daryl, as the man on the rooftop put his rifle down. 

“You should listen to me, there’s a lot of us…” Alex said as he tried to reason with Rick.

“Where did you get the watch?”

“I took it from a dead one, didn’t think it was important…”

Rick nodded, obviously not believing a word he was saying. “What about the riot gear? The backpack?”

“Found the riot gear on a dead cop, the backpack we got it on a camping store.”

Connor and Daryl were practically back to back, moving slightly as they changed targets trying to keep everyone pointing a gun at them within their sights. 

“Gareth, we can wait,” Alex said as he looked panicked as Rick jabbed the gun against the side of his neck once again.

“Shut up, Alex.” Daryl sneaked a glance at Gareth who was standing in front of Rick with one hand up, and he tightened his grip on his bow. The man did not looked worried at all, that on itself was worrying for them. 

“Be ready,” Daryl muttered to Connor, feeling as his brother nodded. 

“You talk to me.” 

“What is left to say?” Daryl threw another nervous look, shifting from one foot to the other as he quickly moved to point at another person that had moved a step closer. “You don’t trust us anymore.”

“Gareth…” Alex whimpered. 

“Shut up!” Connor’s hackles raised as he heard Gareth shut down Alex’s pleas once again. 

“Gareth, please.”

“It’s okay…” there was nothing okay, and the fact that Gareth continued to act so sure of himself made them all fearful of what was going to happen. “Rick, what do you want?” 

“Where are our people?” Daryl looked around once again, taking notice of what was there and what wasn’t. Glenn must have been there, most of the things came from him. But there was nothing from Carol and Murphy. Nothing. 

“You didn’t answer the question.” Rick was barely able to turn, as Gareth closed his fist to use Alex as a shield as the people around them started shooting at them. 

Connor took aim at the ones on the roof first, taking out one before he had to duck as gunfire rained on them. Connor just followed Daryl, shooting at people over his brother’s shoulder whenever they had to change directions as they shot at the ground they were running on. 

“Come on!” Rick said, pushing Carl in front of them when once again their path was closed by people firing at them. 

“Fuck this,” Connor said as he pulled Daryl by the back of his vest when a bullet got too close to comfort. 

And they ran. A series of closed doors, and gunfire forcing them to follow certain path. Daryl kept looking over his shoulder, making sure his brother was still there. Behind him. 

“Come on, this way!”

Connor threw an arm over Daryl’s back, as Daryl leaned down as a reflex as gunfire started again in front of them. Forcing them, yet again to take the path they wanted them to take. 

The screams from inside the cargo container made Connor stop, there were people in there. People clamoring for help. 

“Con, come on!” Daryl grabbed his brother’s arm, dragging him behind him, leaving those in need behind. 

“You okay?” Daryl asked softly, as they followed the rest of the group into a huge room filled with candles. Connor gave him a sharp nod. “What the fuck is this place?” 

“This people, I don’t think they want to kill us…” Michonne said, her eyes looking around the place taking in everything.

“They don’t, they’re aiming at our feet… that way!” Rick pointed at an open door, and the five of them started to make it towards it only to have some shut it as Rick was getting to it. 

“Here,” Daryl said pointing at the only open door at the other side of the room. 

Connor made sure he stayed at Daryl’s back at all times. His brother who once again was barely able to stop in time as people started shooting at the ground in front of him. 

They stopped as men rose from just behind the fence. They were surrounded. People were on the rooftops, and as good as a shot they were, there was no way they were all walking out of there alive if they open fire. 

Daryl and Connor turned to each other, desperation on each others face. It couldn’t end like it, it just couldn’t. They still had so much to do, they had to find Murphy and Carol, they had to get Carl to safety. 

“Nine lives, Decks, nine lives.” Daryl gave Connor a sharp nod, the ghost of a sad smile on his lips. 

“Drop your weapons, now!” Connor clenched his jaw as he heard the voice of Gareth, yell at them. Daryl was the first one to pinpoint exactly where the leader of this group was, standing on top of a low building. “Now!”

Daryl sneered, throwing first his bolt, then dropping his crossbow before throwing his knife down. Connor followed suite, dropping his gun and then his knife. 

“Ring leader, to the left, train car, go!”

Connor tried to make eye contact with the paralized in fear looking Carl, but the boy was not looking at anyone. Rick looked at the car, before looking at his son, without making any movement. 

“If you do as you say, they boy goes with you. Anything else, he dies and you end up there anyway.”

Rick looked at Carl, before doing as he was told. 

“Now the archer.” Daryl looked at Connor, before moving to follow Rick. 

“Now lucky charms.” Connor grumbled as he followed Daryl, who kept looking back as if to make sure his brother was coming. “And now the samurai.”

There were a few yards in between them. 

“Stand at the door, ring leader, archer, lucky charms and samurai, in that order.”

Connor could see where Daryl’s hands were shaking, in fear or in anger he wasn’t sure. He longed to be able to touch his brother but he kept still as he felt Michonne walk behind him. They still had Carl out there in the middle of the yard.

The four of them were looking at Carl, and Carl was looking back at them. It was time like those that they were all reminded that he was just a kid, a kid that wanted his father protection right then. 

“My son!” 

“Go, kid.” There was a collectively sigh when Carl started to walk slowly towards them. 

“Ring leader, open the door and go in!” Rick hesitated, still watching as Carl slowly made his way towards them.

“We got this, Rick, we got this.” Connor said softly.

“I’ll go in with him!”

“Don’t make us kill him now!”

“Rick!” Daryl hissed, still looking down.

Rick nodded, swallowing as he took the first couple of steps and opened the door. Rick went in, followed by Daryl. 

Daryl stayed just inside the door, pulling Connor into a quick hug. “We’re good, Decks, we’re good.” Daryl nodded, patting Connor’s chest as he moved back to watch as Carl finally went inside the car too. 

Connor still had an arm around Daryl’s shoulders when they heard shuffling from the other side of the car. 

“Rick?” Something inside Connor’s chest seemed lit up as they saw Glenn move forward, followed closely by Maggie. 

“You’re here…” More people started coming forward, and Connor couldn’t help but search for Murphy and Carol among them. A bunch of unknown people moved forward, getting a wary look from Rick. 

“They’re our friends…” Maggie explained at their Leader’s look. “They helped save us.”

Daryl gave Maggie a nod, feeling as Connor took a step forward. “Murphy? Carol? Did you see them?”

 

Maggie frowned at Connor’s question, her eyes going to Rick in confusion. “Carol? Connor…” Maggie took a step forward, “Didn’t Rick-”

"Not now,” Rick growled as he glared at Connor from over his shoulder, before he moved to try and see through the space between the door and the car. “We need to come up with a plan, we need to get out of here.”

“Where is Carol?” Connor asked Maggie, taking a small step forward. 

Daryl’s hand immediately moved to grab his brother’s wrist, his grip so tight he was sure he was going to leave a bruise. “Connor, calm down.”

“I am calm, Daryl, I just want to know where my wife is!” Connor pushed Daryl away with his free hand, feeling no satisfaction when his brother, not expecting the move from him, slammed against the side of the train car. 

“Where is she, Maggie? What do you know?” Maggie shook her head, looking everywhere but at him. “What if it was Glenn, wouldn’t you want to know?”

“Connor, stop it!” Rick barked as he came up to Connor, fisting the neck of his shirt and getting in his face, “Not now.”

“It was Rick…” both men turned to look at Maggie, who seemed like she was about to start crying when she looked apologetically at Connor. “She wasn’t there when the prison fell, he had left her behind before all that.” 

“Look Connor, it was for the best…” Rick let go of Connor’s shirt, taking a step back looking down at his hands as he tried to explain himself. “You don’t know what she did, but-”

He was still looking down when Connor tackled him in the middle and slammed him against the side of the train car. “I know perfectly what she did!” Connor screamed at Rick as he slammed his right fist against his face once, and then again, while he kept him in place with his left hand around his neck. 

Daryl tried to grab his brother by the waist, to get him off Rick; but it was then when Rick seemed to snap. Just like he had done with Tyreese, the moment he felt the weight off him he responded. He just didn’t expect to find someone like Connor as an opponent. 

Connor’s head slammed back as Rick punched him across his cheek, only to have him throw a kick at Rick’s knee forcing him down. As Rick was falling down, Connor slammed his knee to his face, blood splattering around as Rick’s nose started bleeding. 

“Stop!” Rick yelled as he knelt in front of Connor, a Connor that was pulling against where Daryl had finally gotten a hold of him. Daryl had Connor’s arms pinned, as he continued to struggle against Daryl’s hold. “I had to do it! She killed Karen and David in cold blood!”

“I killed Karen! I did it!” Connor’s voice broke as tears streamed down his face as he looked down at Rick, “they were drowning, they were not breathing anymore, we put them down, we stopped their suffering…”

“I…” Rick looked shocked, as if the idea had never crossed his mind, “I…”

Connor had stopped struggling, so Daryl slacked his grip.

That was the biggest mistake. 

“You had no right!” Connor threw himself at Rick once again, getting him against the floor, raining punches down on him. “No right!”

“Connor!” “Stop!” “He’s going to kill him!”

Suddenly Connor found himself pushed against the metal wall, his arms in a painful grip against his back, his cheek against the metal of the car. “You are going to fucking calm down, or I swear to God I will castrate you!” A voice, an unknown voice, yelled at Connor’s ear and that only made him thrash harder against the man holding him. 

“Get off my brother!” Suddenly the weight was off his back, and Connor was being roughly turned to look at the concerned face of Daryl.

“You knew?” Connor’s voice was small, and tears and blood were making a mess out of his face. 

“I-” Daryl stopped, closing his mouth and nodding. Connor could see tears in his brother’s eyes. 

“She’s gone, she’s gone,” Daryl face turned into a grimace when he heard Connor’s words, as if keeping himself from starting to cry too, and he shook his head in denial of his brother’s words. Daryl pulled the crying Connor closer letting him burrow his face in his neck. “She’s gone.” 

Connor grabbed Daryl’s vest, his angry sobs filling the car around them. Daryl glared at the people surrounding them as he moved them awkwardly towards the other side of the car. Grunting in pain as he felt his back connect against the corner, sliding down the wall as he kept Connor close. 

His brother’s knees gave out, dropping him on Daryl’s lap, and Daryl tried to calm his cries as best he could. He dared to look up, looking at the broken group around them, and he felt his eyes start to sting with unshed tears. Daryl burrowed his own face against Connor’s neck. He couldn’t believe this would be the end. 

It couldn’t be.

 

 

  
_ Carol and her boys will be back on the third story of the MacDixons Universe called ‘Roads Go Ever On’.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully the next story will be posted on the first Tuesday of January! 
> 
> Happy holidays guys! See you around! [ Geektaire in tumblr! ](http://geektaire.tumblr.com)

**Author's Note:**

> Ya know the deal by now... I'm a sucker for comments and for people leaving me messaged and talking about Carol and her boys. Ya'll can find me in [ Tumblr ](http://geektaire.tumblr.com) Come and say hi!


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